โNATALIE,ย I just want you to know, I love your products.โ
Iโve got Carmen Salinas on the phone from Happy Healthy, a local wellness store in Quincy. Even though her store is tiny, sheโs a valuable customer. I do whatever I can to give her discounts on products because full price is hard for her.
โIโm so glad,โ I say.
โCollahealth is the best,โ Carmen continues. โIโve been using it myself the last few weeks and I swear to God, I look ten years younger!โ
โI know!โ I say. โI think itโs absolutely a miracle. I wouldnโt go a day without using it!โ
โMe either!โ
Collahealth is our newest product, which is a capsule containing a special formulation of collagen. I swear, this stuff is magic. I barely even have to sell it. It sells itself.
Actually, thatโs not entirely true. I still have to work pretty hard. โSo youโd like another box then?โ I ask.
โMake it two!โ
I scribble down the details for the sale and arrange for additional boxes to be sent to Carmenโs store. All the while, the little turtle figurine stares up
at me. I rubbed off a little more of that dark red material that was adhering to its surface. If it really was a gift from Dawn, Iโm surprised she wouldnโt have cleaned it off. Sheโs obsessed with cleanliness. Iโm tempted to toss it in the trash bin, but if it was a gift from Dawn, I donโt want her to be offended and think I donโt like it.
Except Iย donโtย like it. It gives me the creeps. And what on earth was that dark red material that stained my fingers? It almost looks likeโฆ
Like blood.
Ugh, I canโt let my imagination run away from me. There isย notย a blood- stained turtle figurine on my desk. Itโs probably justโฆ I donโt know, paint that rubbed off from some other figurine that was packed with it. That makes way, way more sense than blood.
Still, the turtle is creeping me out.
Finally, I nudge the turtle with my pinky over to the corner of my desk and turn it so that itโs looking away from me, at the wall of my cubicle. Thereโthatโs better.
Itโs almost noon and Dawn still hasnโt shown up at work. Iโve called her two more times. Sent yet another text message. I donโt know what to do. She mentioned her mother lives out in Beverly, but I donโt know how to contact her. Steve in HR probably has the number. I donโt know if heโs allowed to give it out, but Iโm sure I could charm him into handing it over. But am I overreacting? Dawn is a few hours late to work. But there was that urgent email from her yesterdayโshe was upset enough about something to contact both me and her boss about โa matter of great importance.โ And then that strange phone callโฆ
Help me.
At the time, I thought she sounded hysterical. But now that several hours have passed, Iโm not so sure anymore. Maybe Dawn is fine. Maybe it was just a customer on the phone. And sheโs got that meeting with Seth at two, so Iโm sure sheโll turn up by then.
Anyway, I canโt think about this right now. Iโve got a podcast interview in fifteen minutes that Iโve been preparing for all week.
After I hang up with Carmen, I grab my personal laptop that I brought with me to work this morning and head for the conference room. Just as Iโm exiting my cubicle, I run smack into Caleb McCullough, who was coming to see me.
โHey, Nat. Lunch?โ
Caleb is his usual slightly rumpled but incredibly cute self. Caleb never wears a tie, and I donโt think that white dress shirt has ever seen the hot end of an iron, but itโs not like heโs in sales and has to deal with people. Seth hired Caleb a few months ago to work on updating our website and setting it up to drive sales through the website itself. He comes to the office a couple of days a week and usually works in an empty cubicle.
Also, weโve been dating for nearly two months.
โIโm kind of busy.โ I smile apologetically. โIโve got that podcast interview in fifteen minutes.โ
โOh, right.โ Caleb nods. โGood luck with that. Youโll be great.โ
He smiles at me when he wishes me good luck. Caleb is just slightly above average in looksโtall and lanky with baggy eyesโbut when he smiles, it transforms him. He is movie star-level handsome when he smiles. The first time he smiled at me, I was gone.
But in the last (almost) two months, I have discovered a lot of other qualities about Caleb that I adore, besides his dazzling smile. Heโs a hard worker, a whiz at computers, funny as hell, and most importantly, heโs a good guy. Whatever else you can fake, itโs hard to fake being a genuinely kind person. Itโs also exceedingly rare.
Although what I like best about Caleb is the way he looks at me. Like he canโt quite believe his luck.
Iโve dated a lot of guys in my life. Too many, probably. And my last relationship was a complete disaster that made me seriously worry for my safety. But for the first time in thirty years, I feel like I might have met The One. Weโve only been together for a short time, but sometimes you donโt need long to know. My grandparents dated for only one month before getting engaged. And they were married for sixty years.
Not that Caleb and I are getting engaged any time soon. I mean, we havenโt even slept together yet. But I could see it happening. I could see myself spending my life with this man. And Iโm ready to make that kind of commitment. Caleb is ready too. His father died when he was young, and itโs made him eager to start a family. He told me heโs just waiting for the right womanโhint, hint.
So I allow Caleb to pull me closer to him, pressing his lips against mine under the flickering fluorescent lights. Itโs an office kiss, but itโs enough to make me tingle down to my toes. Sometimes the most chaste kisses are the s*xiest ones.
โI had a great time last night,โ I murmur.
He beams at me. โMe too. You have no ideaโฆโ
Caleb came over for dinner last night at my place. I ordered in Chinese food, and then we had a pretty steamy make-out session. But he was a total gentleman and didnโt push me to go further or spend the night. Which was pretty classy, considering I absolutely would have said yes if he did. Caleb isย respectful. Itโs another rare quality.
Even though I was aย littleย sad when he went home at only 9:30. โHey,โ I say to him. โYou havenโt seen Dawn today, have you?โ โWho?โ
โThe woman in the cubicle next to mine.โ Heโs still looking at me blankly, so I add, โThe one with the really short hairโlike a military cut? Really into turtles?โ
โOh.โ He snaps his fingersโeverybody knows about Dawn and her turtles. โRight. No, I havenโt. Why?โ
I consider telling him about Dawn being late this morning and the strange phone call. But Iโm trying to show him my best side at this point in our relationship, and I donโt want him to think Iโm a worrywart. Plus Iโm going to be late for my podcast interview.
โNothing,โ I say. โNever mind.โ
He reaches for my hand and laces his fingers through mine. Then he gives me a squeeze. โKnock โem dead on the podcast, Nat.โ
โIโll do my best.โ Before I forget, I reach into the box of T-shirts and pull out an extra large that I earmarked for him. โHereโs your T-shirt for Saturday, by the way.โ
I hold it up against his chest, to make sure itโs the right size. Caleb is tall, but it doesnโt look like the shirt will be too short on him. It looks perfect.
โAppreciate it,โ he says. โI canโt wait to run circles around you.โ
I smack him playfully on the shoulder. โYou wish. Iโve been training.โ โAnd Iโm justย naturallyย great at running.โ
I laugh, and he winks at me as he tugs the T-shirt out of my grip and then returns to his workstation. I truly wish I could go to lunch with him today. Iโve been feeling strung out all morning after that strange phone call, and it would be nice to go out for a bit and forget my troubles. But Iโve got to do this interview. Itโs really important.
When I get to the conference room, I take out my compact from my purse and give myself a once-over before starting the interview. I realize itโs ridiculous to worry about how I look for a podcast interview, but I always feel more confident when I know that I look good. Sure enough, my lipstick is still intact from this morning, my mascara isnโt caked in the corner of my eye, and my skin looks pinker and healthier than this morning.
I angle the compact to get a quick look at my hairโmy roots are starting to show. For my entire childhood, I had perfect golden blond hair, then sometime during my early twenties, it evolved into this washed-out dirty blond color. But itโs nothing a trip to the salon wonโt fixโMagda works wonders. I hope I have time to go before the race on Saturday.
Just as Iโm shoving my compact back in my purse, the call pops up on my laptop. The name flashing on the screen is Sherri Bell. I connect the call and plaster a smile on my face, even though Sherri canโt see me. Again, it doesnโt matter. When youโre smiling, people can hear it in your voice. I always smile during my sales callsโsmile before you dial.
โNatalie!โ Sherri sounds like sheโs smiling too. She has a great voice.
Very perky, like the girl next door. โAre you ready?โ โSo ready,โ I say.
Iโve done several podcast interviews in the past, so I feel relatively experienced with them. Usually, I find a quiet place to set up, like the conference room, and I invested in a decent mic so listeners can actually hear me. This is the fifth podcast interview Iโve done to promote my 5K, so I shouldnโt be nervous at all.
But something about this entire day is making me edgy.
โToday we have Natalie Farrell joining us,โ Sherriโs voice pipes up through the speakers. โNatalie has organized a 5K run this Saturday to benefit a foundation doing research in cerebral palsy.โ
โThatโs right, Sherri.โ
โNow, Natalie, I hear you have quite a few people participating in this charity run?โ
I clear my throat. The key to talking on podcasts is not to go on too long. You want it to be a conversation, not a monologue. โYes, thatโs right. I work at a fabulous company called Vixed, which sells nutritional supplements, and almost all of my coworkers will be running, as well as many people in the community. Weโve raised a lot of money so far and are still soliciting donations.โ
โAnd this is not the first time youโve done this, right?โ
โItโs my fifth time. And we have more people participating this year than any other year previously.โ
โAmazing.โ Sherri pauses. โNow tell me a little bit about this charity. I hear itโs very meaningful to you.โ
I am vaguely aware that Sherri has asked me a question and I need to answer it, but something has distracted me. Before starting the podcast, I put my phone on silent and placed it on the conference table next to my laptop. Now the phone is vibrating with an incoming call. I look down at the screenโthe call is from a blocked number.
Like this morning.
Help me.
โNatalie?โ Sherriโs voice startles me out of my distraction. โAre you okay?โ
โYes, yes.โ Thank God she can edit this prior to the broadcast. Iโm desperate to take the call, but I recognize how incredibly rude it would be, so I let it go to voicemail. โSorry about that. What was your question?โ
โI was just wondering why this charity is so close to your heart.โ
โWellโฆโ I close my eyes and take a deep breath. I always get choked up during this part, but at least it takes my mind off the mystery phone call. โMy best friend growing up had cerebral palsy. She struggled with it a lot. Unfortunately, sheโs no longer with us. So this is in Ameliaโs honor.โ
โOh my. I can hear how much you must miss her. Iโm sure sheโs looking down on you and grateful for what a good friend you were and still continue to be.โ
โYes. Iโฆ I hope so.โ
I take another deep breath, struggling to get my composure back. Itโs hard to talk about Amelia, but sheโs the reason Iโm doing this. That always needs to be said.
We spend the next fifteen minutes talking more about the charity itself and the details of the run. This Saturday is promising to be a beautiful day, and weโre going to have a great showing at Florian Hall, which is the start and the end point of the run.
I expect it will go off without a hitch.