12
โTHE MYSTERY ILLNESS,โ I say. โI remember reading about that. Two years where Nina Gill couldnโt work. Right as talkies started coming out.โ
โAnd she was in the news more than ever,โ Margaret agrees. โI can guess what your Dove Franklin had to say about all of that in his so-called book.โ
โSince when am I responsible for him?โ I tease. โIโm not even the one who bought that book! Blame my parents. But yes, he had his theories about her time away.โ
She flashes me a smile over the ceaseless movement of her hands among the glass shards. โLet me guess: She couldnโt hack it in the changing landscape of Hollywood. No one wanted her in the talkies and her star began to fall even faster than it had risen, leading to a two-year mental breakdown, the likes of which she never fully recovered from.โ
I nod. โAn actress at the height of her fame, taking a two-year hiatus and then spending the majority of that in and out of hospitals around the worldโa mental breakdown seemed less far fetched to me than some of his other theories.โ
Her hands still on her tools, and something passes across her face.
โThere are all kinds of reasons for a woman to want to disappear. Always
have been.โ
โSuch as?โ I say gently.
Margaret peels her gloves off her small but calloused hands. โLetโs walk back to the house. Jodi will certainly bring lunch here, but she wonโt be
happy about it. She doesnโt like waiting on me.โ
โIs she paid to?โ I ask, since, still, no information about their relationship has been provided to me.
Margaretโs head cocks prettily to one side. โNo, I wouldnโt say that,โ she settles on, as enigmatic of an answer as I wouldโve expected from her.
I pack up my things, and we leave the workshop, the doors still ajar and unlocked, the ceiling fans still twirling.
We start down the path, in the opposite direction from which Jodi and I arrived, curving around the other side of the garden beds back toward the house. When I point this out, Margaret nods. โItโs all the same path. You just stay on it, and youโll get where youโre going, eventually.โ
โLike the labyrinth,โ I say, clutching my recorder, still running, in one hand and my phone in the other.
โMore or less,โ she says. โIโve thought about turning the whole thing into a mosaic, connecting it to the labyrinth. Probably donโt have that many years left of my life though. Thatโs a lot of work.โ
โSo it was on purpose?โ I say. โThe unicursal path.โ
โI like taking away that element of decision, whenever I can.โ
โWhyโs that?โ I ask.
โBecause it gives me peace,โ she says. โRemembering my decisions donโt make much of a difference in the end.โ
I balk, even miss a step. โYou really think that?โ
Another sly, nearly coquettish smile, and at eighty-seven years old, sheโs still pulling it off. โThink. Hope. Somewhere in between the two.โ
The path curls down to walk along the marsh, and I see a fan boat docked among the reeds. โYou use that much?โ I ask.
โNot much,โ she says. โBut more often than I use the car.โ
โThat hardly tells me anything,โ I point out.
โNow youโre catching on,โ she teases.
But honestly, Iโm not. When I let her talk, sheโll talk. But when I want a straight answer, sheโs more evasive.
Which once again begs the question: What am I doing here?
โIโm curious about something,โ I say.
โIโd describe you as curious about everything,โ Margaret parries.
โHazard of the trade,โ I say, then admit, โor more realistically, I was just born this way.โ
โSounds like youโre on a unicursal path of your own,โ she reasons.
She doesnโt invite me to ask my question, but I do anyway: โWhy now?โ
โWhat do you mean?โ she says innocently. I give her a look, and she laughs. โEvery once in a while, youโve got some bite, Alice Scott. I like that.โ
โThank you. And I like when you answer the questions I ask.โ
Another laugh. โI know I look great, but Iโm old. If not now, when?โ
โRight,โ I agree. โBut โneverโ was an option. Something had to have convinced you to talk to me. And as great as I am, I donโt buy that it was my rambling voicemail.โ
We pause at the back doors to Margaretโs house. โI made a promise to someone,โ she says. โAnd then they died before I could tell them I took it back.โ
โYouโre not going to tell me who, are you?โ I ask.
She smiles and opens the door. โNot today.โ
As we step inside, from somewhere deeper in the house, Jodi grunts, โYouโre back.โ
โNothing gets past you, does it?โ Margaret leads me through a door into a bright, powder-blue kitchen, where Jodiโs slicing sandwiches into tiny triangles.
โTuna salad?โ Margaret asks, leaning over Jodiโs shoulder to look at the cutting board.
โCucumber,โ Jodi says, โand now that youโre back, you can take over.โ
Margaret gives a belabored sigh, but still steps up to the task when Jodi retreats to wash her hands over the deep double sink, its overhead window looking out on the backyard.
โHow long does it usually take a person to get used to this house?โ I ask. โI donโt understand how anything is connected. I wouldโve thought we were at the front of the house here.โ
โThereโs no โusually,โ โ Margaret says.
I frown, which makes her laugh.
โNot a facial expression Iโve seen you do much of,โ she says.
On her way out of the room, Jodi says, โNo one has to get used to the house, because no one except us is ever in it.โ
โEver?โ I ask.
Margaret gives an unbothered shrug. โMore or less.โ
โHow do you sell your work, to the shops and galleries?โ I ask.
She waves a hand. โOh, Jodi handles all that. Not that thereโs much to handle. Like I saidโmost tourists are looking for a different sort of thing than what I do.โ
That certainly explains the reaction from the shopkeeper whoโd finally passed along Margaretโs contact information. Heโd said something along the lines of, Youโre welcome to it, but if Irene Mayberry is actually Margaret
Ives, then Iโm Elvis.
โWhat about groceries?โ I ask.
โJodi,โ she says. โJodi handles it all.โ
โAnd what, you just stay in this house all day?โ
โI stay in the yard mostly,โ Margaret says. โOr out on the boat. Or in my
home.โ
โThatโs got to be lonely,โ I say.
โLess so than youโd think,โ she retorts. โYou get used to it, isolation.
Funny thing is, I was already used to it by the time I โdisappeared.โ โ
โMeaning?โ I ask.
โNo more chitchat right now,โ she says. โItโs nearly dinnertime, and no one needs to see the inside of my mouth while Iโm eating.โ
โข โข โข ON FRIDAY, THE morning after my best session with Margaret yet, Iโm picking through my notesโand typing up an extremely uninspiring (though blessedly short) article on new skin-care trends for The Scratchโwhen Theo texts me.
Iโm shooting in Atlanta rn, he says.
Oh, nice, I write back. Who/what?
That new fashion designer Mogi, he replies. Should be a good time.
Heโs not giving me a ton of conversational ammo here, but Iโd rather be doing anything than working right now, while sitting out on Little Croissantโs patio, sweating through my sundress, so I write back anyway: Yeah, Atlantaโs super cool! Let me know if you want any recs.
How far is it from where you are? he says.
I do a quick search to double-check. Not that close. Like three and a
half hours by car.
Shit, he says.
A second later, a new message buzzes in. What are you up to this weekend?
Oh, nothing, just more meandering interviews that manage to avoid almost anything juicy from a story Iโm sure is ninety percent juice.
Nothing today, working tomorrow during the
day, then nothing Sunday and Monday.
Nice, he says, adding, I prob will be done by Saturday night too.
The text just hangs there, and understanding clicks into place. Heโs doing what he always does: not quite asking me to ask him to hang out. Itโs annoying, how indirect he always is, but at least thereโs some comfort in knowing him well enough to read between the lines. Unlike the horror that unfolded between me and Hayden the other night.
I take a screenshot of the exchange and text it to my friends.
Priya is the first to reply: A girlโs gotta eat, Alice.
Bianca is right behind her: Turn in your skincare piece. Also BARF.
Cillian slides in next: MY ENEMY.
I thumbs-up Biancaโs text first, then write out my reply: Iโm going to invite him to come down but thatโs where I draw the line. I will NOT
be asking whether I can fly to HIM.
Tell him he can meet you there, then send him this address, Cillian says. I follow the link heโs sent.
It takes me to a map of Antarctica, a little pin over something called the Pole of Inaccessibility research station.
Will do! I say, then text Theo: Youโre welcome to come down if you want. Thereโs not a ton to do, but thereโs at least one cute bar/restaurant and a good coffee shop, and itโs beautiful.
Really? Theo says.
Yes.
Sure, why not? I could drive down when I
finish up tomorrow afternoon. Meet around
seven?
Sounds good, I tell him, then turn my phone over and click back to
yesterdayโs notes.
We covered a decent amount of ground.
Nina Gillโs mystery illness. The fluctuating weight. The hair loss. The months sheโd spent in the Swiss Alps while she recovered.
During their time apart, Nina had fallen in love with her doctor, and in the aftermath of her and Geraldโs breakup, he finally reconnected with his sister, Gigi, whose English husband had died not long after she discovered she was pregnant.
Gerald insisted on moving Gigi and her new baby, Ruth, onto his estate, now that Nina had moved out and on with the doctor.
โOut of the blue?โ Iโd asked Margaret, and sheโd given one of those dry, secretive smiles.
โNothing is out of the blue, when it comes to my family,โ she said. โNot ever.โ
I could feel the hidden meaning beneath the words, but when I pressed her on it, she evaded me. Just kept going with her story.
For a time, Gerald had continued his management of Ninaโs career, even after her marriage, but the truth was, even with his media pull, the time away had changed the landscape too much for her. The reviews of her newer films were mostly concerned with the physical toll her illness had taken on herโsheโd visibly aged and gained a fair bit of weight, and an outlet beyond Geraldโs control had nicknamed her the not-so ingenue. With the emphasis on new.
The audiences had tired of her too. As far as they were concerned, she belonged to the silent-film era, and every time she spoke, her surprising voice convinced them sheโd overstayed her welcome.
She left the business entirely in 1931, and that same year, Gerald moved his wife, Rosalind, and his now grown children down to the House of Ives, as if the last twelve years apart had never happened.
Freddy and Francine were twenty-seven and twenty-six respectively by then, both unmarried and neither excited about relocating their entire lives.
But Gerald controlled all the money, and so when he said jump, they jumped. Thus, he; his wife; his grown children; his sister, Gigi; and her daughter, Ruth, all wound up living in the same house. If you could call the Ives estate a house, and honestly, I donโt think you can. But still.
โGerald and Rosalind never shared a room again, of course,โ Margaret told me. โThey were cold but cordial. And it was much too late for him to fix his relationship with his own children, but his niece was just a baby, so essentially all that opulence Gerald had lavished on his mistress was turned toward baby Ruth at that point. She was the light of his life. The world had probably never seen such a spoiled childโuntil Laura and I came along, anywayโbut she was good natured to her core. When she was small, her nickname was Little Princess, and even when Laura and I were little girls and Ruth was a young woman, we all mostly called her LP.โ
It wasnโt a bad interview. It was arguably good! But I could feel that there was more lurking just underneath what she was saying, and she still didnโt trust me enough to share it.
Iโd offered multiple times to stop recording, but sheโd waved off the
offer.
โYou can trust me,โ I promised her.
She parried with, โYou can trust me too.โ
It effectively ended the discussion. If I wanted her to open up to me, I had to respect that she had her own reasons for what she chose to share and when.
Margaret refused to be rushed, and I knew that pushing would only slow us down in the long run. If I got the job, thereโd be plenty of time to dig into these stories. My only real goal, these next three and a half weeks, was to earn her trust.
I just had to hope Hayden wasnโt having better luck than I was.
โข โข โข ON SATURDAY MORNING, Iโm driving through the fog to Margaretโs house when she calls to cancel on me.
โSomething came up,โ she says through my rental carโs speakers when I take her call. I put on my blinker and pull off into the Little Croissant / gift shop / enclave parking lot.
โNo problem at all,โ I assure her. โIf you just need a few hours, we
could meet later?โ
โNot today,โ she says stiffly.
โThen tomorrow?โ I suggest.
โNot tomorrow either,โ she says.
And Monday sheโll be meeting with Hayden. I ignore the sinking sensation in my chest, grapple for a grip on the hope that this doesnโt mean sheโs close to firing me, before Iโve even been hired.
I clear my throat. โShould we just pick things back up during our Tuesday session?โ I ask, crossing all of my fingers against the steering wheel as I pull into a shady parking spot.
โIf I can, yes,โ she says, but offers nothing else.
โOkay, well, if things change on your end, or even if you just need something, donโt be afraid to reach out.โ
โYouโre a sweet girl,โ she says, and I swear thereโs a hint of regret in
her voice.
Sheโs about to fire me. Isnโt she?
I swallow a lump of emotion and let my hand hover over the button to end the call. โOkay, well, take care, Margaret.โ
โYou too, Alice,โ she says, and we hang up.
I sit, staring at the wheel, trying all my best pep talks on myself and, for once, getting nowhere. With a groan, I slump forward.
Something thunks next to my left ear and I sit up with a yelp, spinning toward the window.
A gap-toothed man in a bucket hat grins at me from the other side of the glass. Captain Cecil gives a hearty wave, then steps back to make room for the door as I swing it open and step out into the heat. โThere she is!โ he says, like Iโm just the person he wanted to see.
Me, a perfect stranger heโs bumped into twice.
Instantly, my mood lifts. My heart very nearly soars. Iโve found a kindred spirit in Cecil, and it makes me realize how lonely Iโve been since the awkwardness with Hayden last week. I should be used to the isolation of this job, but Iโm not sure I ever will be.
โI was wondering when Iโd run into you again,โ I tell him.
โAnd I you,โ he says. โI have an invitation for you.โ
โOh?โ I say, intrigued.
โFish Bowlโs having a little soiree tonight,โ he says.
โI do love a soiree,โ I say. โCelebrating anything in particular?โ
โAs a matter of fact, yes,โ he says. โItโs an annual fete. In honor of my
birthday.โ
โOh, wow! Happy birthday!โ I say.
He chortles. โThank you, dear, but my birthday isnโt until December.
This is just in honor of my birthday, which happens to be Christmas. I always thought that was a raw deal, so I started throwing myself a summer bash about ten years ago and never looked back.โ
โGenius,โ I say, and his grin widens again.
โI think so,โ he agrees. โAnyway, small bites provided, no gifts required, and drinks at happy hour prices. Stop by if you feel so inclined.โ
โI will,โ I promise him. โWould it be all right if I brought a friend?โ
โAlready made a friend!โ he cries. โOther than me, of course.โ
I laugh. โWell, no. Someone from back home. Heโs driving up from Atlanta later today.โ
โSure, bring him along,โ he says. โItโs a more-the-merrier situation.โ
โMy favorite kind,โ I say.
โThen Iโll see you sometime between seven and midnight, Ms. Scott.โ
He tips his bucket hat at me and saunters off.
The smell of ground coffee beans beckons me, a siren call coming from Little Croissant. I grab my laptop from my back seat and head toward the robinโs-egg blue coffee shopโs elevated platform.
Iโm out, so I might as well enjoy it, but if I canโt interview Margaret, Iโm at least going to do some more independent research.
I order an iced brown sugar latte at the window, then take it down to the flagstone patio.
Some deep part of my subconscious feels his presence and sends an uncanny prickle to the back of my neck in the second before my gaze sweeps over the hunched, hulking shape of Hayden Anderson.
His computer sits on the little mosaic table in front of him, but his eyes are right on me.
Thereโs no pretending we didnโt see each other.
For once, I wish I was a little less chronically polite, that I was as comfortable with a good scowl or blank stare as the man four feet in front
of me.
โHello,โ I say coolly.
โHi.โ His reply is terse, uncomfortable. Everything about him is terse and uncomfortable, which makes me feel a little better about our last humiliating encounter.
Another beat. โAnyway!โ I turn toward the table farthest from him. Itโs probably only fifteen feet away, but I think I can manage to pass five
minutes there before finding an excuse to leave.
โShouldnโt you be with Margaret today?โ he asks.
My shoulders rise protectively. I should brush him off, make an excuse, or flat-out not answer. Thatโs what he would do.
Unfortunately, Iโm stillโat my coreโme.
Iโm already marching back to his table, the truth pouring out of me.
โShe canceled.โ
His face betrays nothing. It so fully betrays nothing that Iโm positive he knows something. Which I say, as I plop down in the iron chair opposite
him.
โI donโt,โ he says.
Somehow, I can hear the technicality in his voice. Heโs telling the truth, but only just.
โSo you donโt know why she canceled,โ I say, โbut you have a guess.โ
He lets out a sigh. โIโm not going to speculate, Alice.โ
โNo, I know,โ I say. โYou wouldnโt possibly share any helpful information with me, even though I am the smallest and least significant threat to this job that you can possibly imagine.โ
His jaw clenches. โYouโre putting words in my mouth.โ
โIโm reading between the lines,โ I counter.
He leans forward over the table, our knees clashing under it. โJust because youโve made a decision about how I feel,โ he growls, โdoesnโt make it true.โ
โSo, what, youโre not positive Margaretโs going to hire you over me?โ I ask.
โIโm reasonably certain,โ he replies cautiously. โWould you rather I kept that from you?โ
โYouโre pretty keen to keep everything else from me,โ I say.
His frown deepens. His lips part, as if heโs debating saying something.
A sigh escapes him right before he caves: โI canโt give this up.โ
I shift in my seat, my anger abating and leaving me unpleasantly vulnerable. That much I understand. That much I donโt blame him for. I expected him to fight for this opportunity, just like I am.
โI know,โ I admit. โNeither can I.โ
He holds my gaze for one long moment. โI would like to be friends.โ
At my surprised laugh, his inky brows draw together.
โWhatโs funny about that?โ he wants to know.
โDonโt take this the wrong way,โ I warn, โbut you sound like a robot learning to love.โ
His face screws up in bafflement. โI donโt know any way to take that.โ
โI just mean, youโve pushed me away, kissed me, and insulted me,โ I say. โAnd now youโre formally proposing friendship.โ
โI wouldnโt describe our relationship until now like that, exactly,โ he says, visibly and audibly dismayed.
My head cocks to one side. โHow would you describe it?โ
His eyes train on his green tea. He pushes it farther from the ledge. โSo you donโt want to be friends.โ
โYouโre putting words in my mouth,โ I retort.
He barely smiles. โWhat are you doing tonight?โ
โTonight?โ I ask. โHot date. At Fish Bowl.โ
โAh. Too bad,โ he says.
โWere you going to ask me to hang out?โ I ask.
โIf you thought you could go one night without talking about Margaret
Ives,โ he says, โthen yes.โ
โAh,โ I say. โToo bad.โ
โMaybe next month,โ he says.
โMaybe,โ I agree, standing. โIf you can forgive me for taking your job.โ





