No fair, you’re leaning,” she said, smiling up at me, biting her lip.
I was leaning. She was right.
Briana had her back to the wall in the hallway of the hotel, and we were playing the game where we stood as close as possible like we wanted to kiss. Lieutenant Dan sat at our feet. We were waiting for Jewel and Gwen to come out so we could walk down to the ceremony. It was the wedding day.
I stood about an inch from Briana in my suit. She had on a green cocktail dress and heels.
“You can’t kiss me,” she teased. “I have my lipstick on.”
“Can I do this?” I asked, my voice low, leaning down to press my lips to her bare shoulder. “Or how about this?” I moved to her collarbone. “Or this?” Her neck.
She was already out of breath. “You better stop,” she whispered.
“Or what?” I said, my lips so close to her skin I could practically feel her pulse.
“Or you’re going to have to take me back to the room,” she breathed. “Then let’s go back to the room…”
“Oh my God, knock it off,” Jewel called, coming out of her room with Gwen and the twins.
Briana and I laughed, and I backed away from her.
Carter and Katrina ran to me, and I crouched in my suit to pick them up. Carter was the ring bearer, so he was in a little tux with a pink boutonniere.
Katrina was the flower girl, so she had on a poofy white dress and a crown of fresh pink flowers.
“What socks?” Carter asked.
“Alligators. And look what Briana has.” I nodded at her.
Briana pulled her hair off her shoulder to show him her green smiling- alligator earrings.
The twins giggled and squirmed away from me to run toward the elevator.
Jewel looked exasperated. “I have to deliver these two to Mom in the bridal suite. You guys should go sit. Jill and Walter are already down there.”
“Where’s Jane?” I asked.
“Meeting her date in the lobby,” Gwen said, still putting in an earring. “Jane has a date?”
My sister was shy and didn’t usually bring boyfriends around until they’d been together for a while.
“That’s what she said,” Gwen replied. “She was very hush-hush about it.”
I raised my eyebrows at Briana. “A date.” She gave me a wow face.
I loved that Briana knew my sisters. That our worlds were blending. I loved that we got to hold hands even when no one was around to see it. I got to touch her when I felt like touching her—which, frankly, was all the time. We had sex like we were trying to make up for every day we wanted to and couldn’t. Over the last month all my cardio was in bed.
We texted I Love You to each other from across the ER at work. Left it in little notes. Whispered it in the dark. Said it right in the middle of a conversation, just because we could.
My life was a fairy tale.
I didn’t take one second with her for granted. I swore to myself I never would. Being able to hold her while we watched a movie or come up behind her to hug her while she drank her coffee or put a hand on her thigh under a table—it was all a gift. A privilege. And I vowed always to honor that. I wrote about it in my journal—when I had time to journal. I was too busy living the dream that was my life to sit down and document it. But I was so happy.
We got to the courtyard where the ceremony would be taking place and took our seats. There was a trellis dripping with flowers where Amy and Jeremiah would say their vows. The weather was perfect, and the smell of roses ensconced us.
“The wedding coordinator did a good job,” Briana said, looking around. “I love weddings.”
I peered at her. “Would you ever want to get remarried?” I asked.
She gave me a look. “You don’t have to be married to spend the rest of your life with someone.”
“You don’t want to marry me?”
She gave me an amused look. “Are you asking?” “And what would you say if I did?”
“I’d say you cannot marry a man you just started dating. No matter how good the sex is.”
I paused to grin. “How long, then?” She laughed. “I don’t know.”
I pivoted to look at her straight on. “Six months? A year?” “Are you putting a reminder in your phone?”
“I’m serious. I think we should talk about it.”
Her face went soft. She looked like she was about to reply, but then she peered over my shoulder. “Oh my God…”
I turned to see Jane and her date walking down the aisle to take their seats. Her date was Benny.
Briana beamed. “Hey, BEN.”
He ignored her and followed Jane to the front row.
I turned to her. “Did you know they were talking?” I asked.
She shook her head, still smiling. “No. He probably thought I’d tease him. Which I totally would.”
I looked back at Benny. “He looks good.”
She nodded. “He’s putting weight back on, he’s exercising.” “He’s going on dates.”
She gazed at me. “He looks good because of you. Because of what you’re doing.”
I put a hand to her cheek. “Will you still love me when I don’t have any more organs to give?” I asked.
“I’d love you even if you were a talking head in a jar,” she said, speaking to my lips.
“I’d love you even if you didn’t like dogs.”
She gasped. “I’d love you even if I was a gummy bear and you ate me,” she breathed.
“I’d eat you even if you weren’t a gummy bear…”
“Guys, it’s getting fucking gross,” Jewel said, sitting down next to us with Gwen. “Like, we get it, you’re obsessed with each other. Quit it already.”
We both laughed. I was just about to get back to my wedding question, but the bridal march started. Everyone shushed and shifted to watch as the wedding party began to make their way down the aisle.
First Amy’s mom. Then Jeremiah, looking like a kid on Christmas morning. His best man, then the two groomsmen and bridesmaids side by
side. Katrina tossing flower petals, then Carter with the ring pillow.
When Amy finally came down the aisle with her dad to join Jeremiah under the trellis, we all stood.
I felt complete tranquility. I was happy for them. Genuinely happy. The universe had righted itself, and everything was as it should be. Nobody was looking at me to see if I was going to implode, and if they did, they quickly realized I was busy living my own love story and they didn’t look again.
I’d actually been looking forward to this night for weeks. I couldn’t wait to slow-dance with Briana, eat the wedding cake, and then go up to our hotel room after. I was happy about the family photos we would take today because she would be in them, and I’d get to look back and remember that this day was part of the beginning of our lives together.
I was excited about all our firsts.
I peered over at her. “I wish the me of today could send a message to the me of three months ago,” I whispered.
She smiled. “Oh, yeah? And what would you have told yourself?”
“I would have said that when this day came, I wouldn’t care about the wedding because I’d be madly in love with someone else.”
She laughed quietly. “Would you have believed it?” I shook my head with a grin. “No. Probably not.”
It was too good to be true…
