Chapter no 21 – โ€Œโ€Œโ€Œโ€Œโ€Œโ€Œโ€Œโ€Œโ€Œโ€Œโ€Œโ€Œโ€Œโ€Œโ€Œโ€Œโ€Œโ€Œโ€ŒPadawanโ€Œ

Wonder

That night I cut off the little braid on the back of my head. Dad noticed first.

โ€œOh good,โ€ he said. โ€œI never liked that thing.โ€ Via couldnโ€™t believe I had cut it off.

โ€œThat took you years to grow!โ€ she said, almost like she was angry. โ€œWhy did you cut it off?โ€

โ€œI donโ€™t know,โ€ I answered. โ€œDid someone make fun of it?โ€ โ€œNo.โ€

โ€œDid you tell Christopher you were cutting it off?โ€ โ€œWeโ€™re not even friends anymore!โ€

โ€œThatโ€™s not true,โ€ she said. โ€œI canโ€™t believe you would just cut it off like that,โ€ she added snottily, and then practically slammed my bedroom door shut as she left the room.

I was snuggling with Daisy on my bed when Dad came to tuck me in later. He scooched Daisy over gently and lay down next to me on the blanket.

โ€œSo, Auggie Doggie,โ€ he said, โ€œit was really an okay day?โ€ He got that from an old cartoon about a dachshund named Auggie Doggie, by the way. He had bought it for me on eBay when I was about four, and we watched it a lot for a whileโ€”especially in the hospital. He would call me Auggie Doggie and I would call him โ€œdear olโ€™ Dad,โ€ like the puppy called the dachshund dad on the show.

โ€œYeah, it was totally okay,โ€ I said, nodding. โ€œYouโ€™ve been so quiet all night long.โ€

โ€œI guess Iโ€™m tired.โ€

โ€œIt was a long day, huh?โ€ I nodded.

โ€œBut it really was okay?โ€

I nodded again. He didnโ€™t say anything, so after a few seconds, I said: โ€œIt was better than okay, actually.โ€

โ€œThatโ€™s great to hear, Auggie,โ€ he said quietly, kissing my forehead.

โ€œSo it looks like it was a good call Mom made, your going to school.โ€ โ€œYeah. But I could stop going if I wanted to, right?โ€

โ€œThat was the deal, yes,โ€ he answered. โ€œThough I guess it would depend on why you wanted to stop going, too, you know. Youโ€™d have to let us know. Youโ€™d have to talk to us and tell us how youโ€™re feeling, and if anything bad was happening. Okay? You promise youโ€™d tell us?โ€

โ€œYeah.โ€

โ€œSo can I ask you something? Are you mad at Mom or something? Youโ€™ve been kind of huffy with her all night long. You know, Auggie, Iโ€™m as much to blame for sending you to school as she is.โ€

โ€œNo, sheโ€™s more to blame. It was her idea.โ€

Mom knocked on the door just then and peeked her head inside my room.

โ€œJust wanted to say good night,โ€ she said. She looked kind of shy for a second.

โ€œHi, Momma,โ€ Dad said, picking up my hand and waving it at her. โ€œI heard you cut off your braid,โ€ Mom said to me, sitting down at

the edge of the bed next to Daisy.

โ€œItโ€™s not a big deal,โ€ I answered quickly. โ€œI didnโ€™t say it was,โ€ said Mom.

โ€œWhy donโ€™t you put Auggie to bed tonight?โ€ Dad said to Mom, getting up. โ€œIโ€™ve got some work to do anyway. Good night, my son, my son.โ€ That was another part of our Auggie Doggie routine, though I wasnโ€™t in the mood to say Good night, dear olโ€™ Dad. โ€œIโ€™m so proud of you,โ€ said Dad, and then he got up out of the bed.

Mom and Dad had always taken turns putting me to bed. I know it was a little babyish of me to still need them to do that, but thatโ€™s just how it was with us.

โ€œWill you check in on Via?โ€ Mom said to Dad as she lay down next to me.

He stopped by the door and turned around. โ€œWhatโ€™s wrong with Via?โ€

โ€œNothing,โ€ said Mom, shrugging, โ€œat least that she would tell me.

But โ€ฆ first day of high school and all that.โ€

โ€œHmm,โ€ said Dad, and then he pointed his finger at me and winked. โ€œItโ€™s always something with you kids, isnโ€™t it?โ€ he said.

โ€œNever a dull moment,โ€ said Mom.

โ€œNever a dull moment,โ€ Dad repeated. โ€œGood night, guys.โ€

As soon as he closed the door, Mom pulled out the book sheโ€™d been

reading to me for the last couple of weeks. I was relieved because I really was afraid sheโ€™d want to โ€œtalk,โ€ and I just didnโ€™t feel like doing that. But Mom didnโ€™t seem to want to talk, either. She just flipped through the pages until she got to where we had left off. We were about halfway throughย The Hobbit.

โ€œ โ€˜Stop! stop!โ€™ย shouted Thorin,โ€ย said Mom, reading aloud,ย โ€œbut it was too late, the excited dwarves had wasted their last arrows, and now the bows that Beorn had given them were useless.

โ€œThey were a gloomy party that night, and the gloom gathered still deeper on them in the following days. They had crossed the enchanted stream; but beyond it the path seemed to straggle on just as before, and in the forest they could see no change.โ€

Iโ€™m not sure why, but all of a sudden I started to cry.

Mom put the book down and wrapped her arms around me. She didnโ€™t seem surprised that I was crying. โ€œItโ€™s okay,โ€ she whispered in my ear. โ€œItโ€™ll be okay.โ€

โ€œIโ€™m sorry,โ€ I said between sniffles.

โ€œShh,โ€ she said, wiping my tears with the back of her hand. โ€œYou have nothing to be sorry about.โ€ฆโ€

โ€œWhy do I have to be so ugly, Mommy?โ€ I whispered. โ€œNo, baby, youโ€™re not โ€ฆโ€

โ€œI know I am.โ€

She kissed me all over my face. She kissed my eyes that came down too far. She kissed my cheeks that looked punched in. She kissed my tortoise mouth.

She said soft words that I know were meant to help me, but words canโ€™t change my face.

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