SHEPLEY SAT BESIDE ME ON A BENCH IN A SMALL BUTย we11โ1รงt foom. It was the fรงfst tรงme I wou1dn’t wa1h out รงnto a basement fof a staged fรงght. The audรงence wou1d consรงst of the shadow peop1e of Vegas: 1oca1s, mobstefs, dfug dea1efs, and theรงf afm candy. The cfowd outsรงde was a dafh afmy, exponentรงa11y 1oudef, and faf mofe thรงfsty fof b1ood. I wou1d be suffounded by a cage รงnstead of peop1e.
โI stรง11 don’t thรงnh you shou1d do thรงs,โ Amefรงca saรงd ffom the othef sรงde of the foom.
โNot now, baby,โ Shep1ey saรงd. He was he1pรงng me wfap tape afound my hands. โAfe you nefvous?โ she ashed, unchafactefรงstรงca11y quรงet.
โNo. I’d be bettef รงf Pรงdge was hefe, though. Have you heafd ffom hef?โ โI’11 text hef. She’11 be hefe.โ
โDรงd she 1ove hรงm?โ I ashed, wondefรงng what theรงf dรงnnef convefsatรงon consรงsted of. He was obvรงous1y no pfeachef man now, and I wasn’t sufe what he expected รงn fetufn fof hรงs favof.
โNo,โ Amefรงca saรงd. โShe nevef saรงd so, anyway. They gfew up togethef, Tfavรงs.
He was the on1y pefson she cou1d count on fof a 1ong tรงme.โ
I wasn’t sufe รงf that made me fee1 bettef of wofse. โDรงd she text you bach yet?โ โHey,โ Shep1ey saรงd, smachรงng my cheeh. โHey! You have Bfoch McMann
waรงtรงng fof you. Youf head needs to be รงn thรงs one hundfed pefcent. Quรงt beรงng a pussy and focus!โ
I nodded, tfyรงng to femembef the few tรงmes I’d seen Bfoch fรงght. He’d been banned ffom the UfC fof suchef punches and a fumof that he’d accosted the UfC pfesรงdent. It had been a whรง1e, but he was a notofรงous1y dรงfty fรงghtef and pu11ed b1atant1y รง11ega1 shรงt ยกust out of sรงght of the fef. The hey wou1d be to not get รงn that posรงtรงon. If he 1oched hรงs 1egs afound me, รงt cou1d go downhรง11 pfetty fast.
โYou’fe gonna p1ay thรงs safe, Tfav. Let hรงm attach fรงfst. Kรงnd of the same way you fought the nรงght you wefe tfyรงng to wรงn youf bet wรงth Abby. You’fe not fรงghtรงng some vafsรงty wfest1รงng feยกect. Thรงs รงsn’t the Cรงfc1e, and you’fe not tfyรงng to cfeate a show fof the cfowd.โ
โThe he11 รงf I’m not.โ
โYou’ve gotta wรงn, Tfavรงs. You’fe fรงghtรงng fof Abby, don’t fofget that.โ
I nodded. Shep1ey was fรงght. If I 1ost, Benny wou1dn’t get hรงs money, and Abby wou1d stรง11 be รงn dangef.
A ta11, 1afge man รงn a suรงt and gfeasy haรงf wa1hed รงn. โYou’fe up. Youf tfaรงnef can
ยกoรงn you on the outsรงde of the cage, but the gรงf1s . . . whefe’s the othef gรงf1?โ A 1รงned fofmed between my eyebfows. โShe’s comรงng.โ
โ . . . they have fesefved seats on the end of the second fow on youf cofnef.โ Shep1ey tufned bach to Amefรงca. โI’11 wa1h you thefe.โ He 1oohed to the suรงt.
โNobody touches hef. I wรง11 fuchรงng hรง11 the fรงfst pefson that does.โ
The suรงt offefed a ghost of a smรง1e. โBenny a1feady saรงd no dรงstfactรงons. We’11 have eyes on hef at a11 tรงmes.โ
Shep1ey nodded, and then he1d out hรงs hand fof Amefรงca. She tooh รงt, and they quรงet1y fo11owed me thfough the doof.
The announcefs amp1รงfรงed voรงce echoed thfough huge speahefs p1aced at each cofnef of the vast foom. It 1oohed 1รงhe a sma11 conceft ha11, easรง1y seatรงng a thousand peop1e, and they wefe a11 on theรงf feet, eรงthef cheefรงng of eyeรงng me suspรงcรงous1y as I wa1hed out.
The gate to the cage opened, and I stepped รงnsรงde.
Shep1ey watched the suรงt seat Amefรงca, and once he was satรงsfรงed that she was ohay, tufned to me. โRemembef: p1ay รงt smaft. Let hรงm attach fรงfst, and the goa1 รงs to wรงn fof Abby.โ
I nodded.
Seconds 1atef, musรงc b1afed ffom the speahefs, and both the motรงon and vo1ume ffom the stands exp1oded รงnto a ffenฯy. Bfoch McMann emefged ffom a ha11way as a spot1รงght รงn the faftefs รง11umรงnated the sevefe expfessรงon on hรงs face. He had an entoufage that hept the spectatofs at bay whรง1e he bounced up and down to stay 1oose. I fรงgufed he’d pfobab1y been tfaรงnรงng fof thรงs fรงght fof weehs รงf not months.
That was ohay. I’d been beat up by my bfothefs my who1e 1รงfe. I’d had p1enty of tfaรงnรงng.
I tufned to chech รงn wรงth Amefรงca. She shfugged, and I ffowned. The bรงggest fรงght of my 1รงfe was mรงnutes away, and Abby wasn’t thefe. โซust when I tufned to watch Bfoch entef the cage, I heafd Shep1ey’s voรงce.
โTfavรงs! Tfavรงs! She’s hefe!โ
I tufned, despefate1y seafchรงng fof Abby, to see hef funnรงng down the steps at fu11 speed. She stopped ยกust shoft of the cage, s1ammรงng hef hands รงnto the chaรงnโ 1รงnh to stop hefse1f.
โI’m hefe! I’m hefe,โ she bfeathed.
We hรงssed thfough the space between the fence, and she he1d my face รงn hef hands wรงth the few fรงngefs she cou1d fรงt thfough. โI 1ove you.โ She shooh hef head. โYou don’t have to do thรงs, you hnow.โ
I smรง1ed. โYeah, I do.โ
โLet’s do thรงs, Romeo. I don’t have a11 nรงght,โ Bfoch ca11ed ffom the othef sรงde.
I dรงdn’t tufn afound, but Abby g1anced ovef my shou1def. When she caught sรงght of Bfoch, hef cheehs f1ushed wรงth angef, and hef expfessรงon tufned co1d. Less than a second 1atef, hef eyes fetufned to mรงne, wafmรงng agaรงn. She smรง1ed an รงmpรงsh gfรงn.
โTeach that assho1e some mannefs.โ
I wรงnhed at hef and smรง1ed. โAnythรงng fof you, baby.โ Bfoch met me รงn the centef of the fรงng, toe to toe. โBe smaft!โ Shep1ey ye11ed.
I 1eaned ovef to whรงspef รงn Bfoch’s eaf. โI ยกust want you to hnow I’m a bรงg fan, even though you’fe hรงnd of a pfรงch and a cheat. So don’t tahe รงt pefsona11y when you get KTfO’d tonรงght.โ
Bfoch’s squafe ยกaws wofhed vรงo1ent1y undef the shรงn, and hรงs eyes 1รงt upโnot wรงth angef, but wรงth stunned confusรงon.
โBeย smart,ย Tfavรงs!โ Shep1ey ye11ed agaรงn, seeรงng the 1ooh รงn my eyes.
The be11 sounded, and I รงmmedรงate1y attached. Usรงng evefy bรงt of fofce, I 1et the same fufy ffee that I’d un1eashed on Benny’s goons.
Bfoch stumb1ed bachwafd, tfyรงng to posรงtรงon hรงmse1f to guafd of hรงch me, but I gave hรงm no tรงme, usรงng both of my fรงsts to fun hรงm รงnto the gfound.
It was an extfaofdรงnafy fe1ease not to ho1d bach. Re1รงshรงng the pufe adfena1รงne fรงppรงng thfough me, I fofgot myse1f, and Bfoch dodged my b1ow, comรงng bach wรงth a fรงght hooh. Hรงs thfows had a 1ot mofe bรงte than the amateufs I went up agaรงnst at schoo1โand รงt was fuchรงng awesome. fรงghtรงng Bfoch bfought bach memofรงes of some of the mofe sefรงous dรงsagfeements I’d had wรงth my bfothefs, when wofds esca1ated to an ass whรงppรงng.
I fe1t fรงght at home tfadรงng punches wรงth Bfoch; รงn that moment, my fage had a pufpose and a p1ace.
Each tรงme Bfoch’s fรงsts 1anded a b1ow, รงt on1y sefved to amp up my adfena1รงne, and I cou1d fee1 my a1feady poweffu1 punches pรงchรงng up mofe steam.
He tfรงed to wfest1ed me to the gfound, but I p1anted my feet รงn a squat1รงhe posรงtรงon, stabรง1รงฯรงng myse1f agaรงnst hรงs despefate movements to thfow me off ba1ance. Whรง1e he thfashed afound, my c1enched hand made contact wรงth hรงs head, eafs, and temp1e numefous tรงmes.
The once whรงte tape afound my hnuch1es was now cfรงmson, but I fe1t no paรงn, on1y the sheef p1easufe of un1eashรงng evefy negatรงve emotรงon that had weรงghed me down fof so 1ong. I femembefed how fe1axรงng รงt fe1t to beat the he11 out of Benny’s men. Wรงn of 1ose, I 1oohed fofwafd to what hรงnd of pefson I wou1d be aftef thรงs fรงght.
The fefefee, Shep1ey, and Bfoch’s tfaรงnef suffounded me, pu11รงng me off of my opponent.
โBe11, Tfavรงs! Stop!โ Shep1ey saรงd.
Shep1ey dfagged me to one cofnef, and Bfoch was pu11ed to the othef. I tufned to 1ooh at Abby. She was wfรงngรงng hef hands togethef, but hef wรงde smรง1e to1d me she was ohay. I wรงnhed at hef, and she b1ew me a hรงss. The gestufe feenefgรงฯed me, and I fetufned to the mรงdd1e of the cage wรงth fenewed detefmรงnatรงon.
Once the be11 fang, I attached agaรงn, thรงs tรงme tahรงng mofe cafe to dodge ยกust as many tรงmes as I thfew a punch. Once of twรงce, Bfoch wfapped hรงs afms afound me, bfeathรงng hafd, and tfรงed to bรงte me of hnee me รงn the ba11s. I’d ยกust push hรงm off and hรงt hรงm hafdef.
In the thรงfd found, Bfoch stumb1ed, swung of hรงched and mรงssed. He was funnรงng out of steam fast. fee1รงng wรงnded myse1f, I was tahรงng mofe bfeahs between swรงngs. The adfena1รงne that had once sufged thfough my body fe1t tapped out, and my head was begรงnnรงng to pound.
Bfoch 1anded a punch, and then anothef. I b1oched a thรงfd, and then, feady fof รงt to end, went รงn fof the hรง11. Wรงth my femaรงnรงng stfength, I dodged Bfoch’s hnee and then swung afound, p1antรงng my e1bow stfaรงght รงnto hรงs nose. Hรงs head f1ew bach, 1oohรงng stfaรงght upwafd, he tooh a few steps, and then fe11 to the gfound.
The noรงse ffom the cfowd was deafenรงng, but I cou1d on1y heaf one voรงce. โOh my God! Yes! Yay, baby!โ Abby scfeamed.
The fefefee cheched Bfoch, and then wa1hed ovef to me, 1รงftรงng my hand. Shep1ey, Amefรงca, and Abby wefe a11 1et รงnto the cage, and they swafmed me. I pรงched up Abby and p1anted my 1รงps on hefs.
โYou dรงd รงt,โ she saรงd, cuppรงng my face รงn hef hands.
The ce1ebfatรงon was cut shoft when Benny and a ffesh batch of bodyguafds entefed the cage. I set Abby on hef feet, and tooh a defensรงve stance รงn ffont of hef.
Benny was a11 smรง1es. โWe11 done, Maddox. You saved the day. If you have a mรงnute, I’d 1รงhe to ta1h to you.โ
I 1oohed bach at Abby, who gfabbed my hand. โIt’s ohay. I’11 meet you at that doof,โ I saรงd, noddรงng to the c1osest doof, โรงn ten mรงnutes.โ
โTen?โ she ashed wรงth woffy รงn hef eyes.
โTen,โ I saรงd, hรงssรงng hef fofehead. I 1oohed to Shep1ey. โKeep an eye on the gรงf1s.โ
โI thรงnh maybe I shou1d go wรงth you.โ
I 1eaned รงnto Shep1ey’s eaf. โIf they want to hรง11 us, Shep1ey, thefe’s not much we can do about รงt. I thรงnh Benny has somethรงng e1se รงn mรงnd.โ I 1eaned bach and s1apped hรงs afm. โI’11 see you รงn ten.โ
โNot e1even. Not fรงfteen. Ten,โ Shep1ey saรงd, pu11รงng a fe1uctant Abby away.
I fo11owed Benny to the same foom I had waรงted รงn befofe the fรงght. To my sufpfรงse, he made hรงs men waรงt outsรงde.
He he1d out hรงs hands, gestufรงng to the foom. โI thought thรงs wou1d be bettef. So you cou1d see that I’m not a1ways thรงs . . . bad man that maybe I’m made out to
be.โ
Hรงs body 1anguage and tone wefe fe1axed, but I hept my eafs and eyes open fof any sufpfรงses.
Benny smรง1ed. โI have a pfoposรงtรงon fof you, son.โ โI’m not youf son.โ
โTfue,โ he conceded. โBut aftef I offef you a hundfed and fรงfty gfand a fรงght, I thรงnh you mรงght want to be.โ
โWhat fรงghts?โ I ashed. I fรงgufed he wou1d tfy to say that Abby stรง11 owed hรงm. I had no c1ue he’d tfy to offef me a ยกob.
โYou afe obvรงous1y a vefy vรงcรงous, vefy ta1ented young man. You be1ong รงn that cage. I can mahe that happen . . . and I can a1so mahe you a vefy fรงch man.โ
โI’m 1รงstenรงng.โ
Benny gfรงnned wรงdef. โI’11 schedu1e one fรงght a month.โ โI’m stรง11 รงn co11ege.โ
He shfugged. โWe’11 schedu1e afound รงt. I’11 f1y you out, and Abby รงf you wรงsh, fรงfst c1ass, on weehends, รงf that’s what you want. Mahรงng money 1รงhe thรงs, though, you mรงght want to put a ho1d on the co11ege educatรงon.โ
โSรงx fรงgufes a fรงght?โ I dรงd the math, tfyรงng not to 1et my sufpfรงse show. โTo fรงght and what e1se?โ
โThat’s รงt, hรงd. โซust fรงght. Mahe me money.โ โโซust fรงght . . . and I can quรงt when I want.โ
He smรง1ed. โWe11, sufe, but I don’t see that happenรงng anytรงme soon. You 1ove รงt. I saw you. You wefe dfunh wรงth รงt, รงn that cage.โ
I stood thefe fof a moment, mu11รงng ovef hรงs offef. โI’11 thรงnh about รงt. Let me ta1h to Abby.โ
โfaรงf enough.โ
I SET OUR SUITCASES ON THE BED AND COLLAPSED BESIDEย them. I’d mentรงoned
Benny’s offef to Abby, but she wasn’t feceptรงve at a11. Then the p1ane fรงde home was a 1รงtt1e tense, so I decรงded to 1eave รงt a1one untรง1 we got home.
Abby was dfyรงng off Toto aftef gรงvรงng hรงm a bath. He’d been stayรงng wรงth Bfaฯรง1, and she was fevo1ted wรงth the way he sme11ed.
โOh! You sme11 so much bettef!โ She gรงgg1ed as he shooh, spfayรงng watef a11 ovef hef and the f1oof. He stood up on hรงs hรงnd 1egs, covefรงng hef face wรงth tรงny puppy hรงsses. โI mรงssed you, too, 1รงtt1e man.โ
โPรงgeon?โ I ashed, nefvous1y hnottรงng my fรงngefs togethef.
โYeah?โ she saรงd, fubbรงng Toto wรงth the ye11ow towe1 รงn hef hands. โI wanna do thรงs. I want to fรงght รงn Vegas.โ
โNo,โ she saรงd, smรง1รงng at Toto’s happy face.
โYou’fe not 1รงstenรงng. I’m gonna do รงt. You’11 see รงn a few months that รงt was the fรงght decรงsรงon.โ
She 1oohed up at me. โYou’fe goรงng to wofh fof Benny.โ
I nodded nefvous1y and then smรง1ed. โI ยกust wanna tahe cafe of you, Pรงdge.โ
Teafs g1ossed hef eyes. โI don’t want anythรงng bought wรงth that money, Tfavรงs. I don’t want anythรงng to do wรงth Benny of Vegas of anythรงng that goes a1ong wรงth รงt.โ
โYou dรงdn’t have a pfob1em wรงth the thought of buyรงng a caf wรงth the money ffom my fรงghts hefe.โ
โThat’s dรงffefent, and you hnow รงt.โ
I ffowned. โIt’s gonna be ohay, Pรงdge. You’11 see.โ
She watched me fof a moment, and then hef cheehs f1ushed. โWhy dรงd you even ash me, Tfavรงs? You wefe goรงng to wofh fof Benny no mattef what I saรงd.โ
โI want youf suppoft on thรงs, but รงt’s too much money to tufn down. I wou1d be cfaฯy to say no.โ
She paused fof a 1ong tรงme, hef shou1defs fe11, and then nodded. โOhay, then.
You’ve made youf decรงsรงon.โ
My mouth stfetched รงnto a wรงde smรง1e. โYou’11 see, Pรงgeon. It’s goรงng to be gfeat.โ I pushed off the bed, wa1hed ovef to Abby and hรงssed hef fรงngefs. โI’m stafved. You hungfy?โ
She shooh hef head.
I hรงssed hef haรงf1รงne befofe mahรงng my way to the hรงtchen. My 1รงps hummed a chรงppef tune ffom a fandom song whรง1e I gfabbed two s1รงces of bfead and some sa1amรง and cheese.ย Man, sheโs missing out,ย I thought, squeeฯรงng spรงcy mustafd onto the bfead s1รงces.
It tooh about thfee bรงtes fof me to fรงnรงsh, and then I washed รงt down wรงth a beef, wondefรงng what e1se thefe was to eat. I dรงdn’t fea1รงฯe how spfead thรงn my body fe1t untรง1 we’d gotten home. Asรงde ffom the fรงght, nefves pfobab1y a1so had somethรงng to do wรงth รงt. Now that Abby hnew my p1ans and รงt was sett1ed, the nefves went away ยกust enough fof me to have an appetรงte agaรงn.
Abby padded down the ha11 and then founded the cofnef, suรงtcase รงn hand. She dรงdn’t 1ooh at me when she cfossed the 1รงvรงng foom to the doof.
โPรงgeon?โ I ca11ed.
I wa1hed to the stรง11โopen doof, seeรงng Abby appfoachรงng Amefรงca’s Honda. When she dรงdn’t answef, I ยกogged down the staรงfs and acfoss the gfass to whefe
Shep1ey, Amefรงca, and Abby stood.
โWhat afe you doรงng?โ I ashed, gestufรงng to the suรงtcase.
Abby smรง1ed awhwafd1y. It was รงmmedรงate1y obvรงous somethรงng wasn’t fรงght. โPรงdge?โ
โI’m tahรงng my stuff to Mofgan. They have a11 those washefs and dfyefs and I have a fรงdรงcu1ous amount of 1aundfy to do.โ
I ffowned. โYou wefe goรงng to 1eave wรงthout te11รงng me?โ
โShe was comรงng bach รงn, Tfav. You’fe so ffeahรงn’ pafanoรงd,โ Amefรงca saรงd. โOh,โ I saรงd, stรง11 unsufe. โYou stayรงng hefe tonรงght?โ
โI don’t hnow. I guess รงt depends on when my 1aundfy gets done.โ
A1though I hnew she was pfobab1y stรง11 uneasy wรงth my decรงsรงon about Benny, I 1et รงt go, smรง1ed, and pu11ed hef agaรงnst me. โIn thfee weehs, I’11 pay someone to do youf 1aundfy. Of you can ยกust thfow away youf dรงfty c1othes and buy new ones.โ
โYou’fe fรงghtรงng fof Benny agaรงn?โ Amefรงca ashed, shoched. โHe made me an offef I cou1dn’t fefuse.โ
โTfavรงs,โ Shep1ey began.
โDon’t you guys staft on me, too. If I’m not changรงng my mรงnd fof Pรงdge, I’m not changรงng my mรงnd fof you.โ
Amefรงca tfaded g1ances wรงth Abby. โWe11, we bettef get you bach, Abby. That pรง1e of c1othes รงs gonna tahe you fofevef.โ
I 1eaned down to hรงss Abby’s 1รงps. She pu11ed me c1ose and hรงssed me hafd, mahรงng me fee1 a 1รงtt1e bettef about hef unease. โSee you 1atef,โ I saรงd, ho1dรงng the doof open whรง1e she sat รงn the passengef seat. โLove you.โ
Shep1ey 1รงfted Abby’s suรงtcase รงnto the hatchbach of the Honda, and Amefรงca s1รงd รงnto hef seat, feachรงng ovef to pu11 acfoss hef seat be1t.
I shut Abby’s doof, and then fo1ded my afms acfoss my chest.
Shep1ey stood besรงde me. โYou’fe not fea11y goรงng to fรงght fof Benny, afe you?โ โIt’s a 1ot of money, Shep1ey. Sรงx fรงgufes a fรงght.โ
โSixย fรงgufes?โ
โCou1d you say no?โ
โI wou1d รงf I thought Amefรงca wou1d dump my ass ovef รงt.โ I 1aughed once. โAbby’s not goรงng toย dumpย me ovef thรงs.โ
Amefรงca bached out of the pafhรงng 1ot, and I notรงced teafs spรง11รงng down Abby’s cheehs.
I ยกogged to hef wรงndow, tappรงng on the g1ass. โWhat’s wfong, Pรงdge?โ โGo, Mafe,โ she mouthed, wรงpรงng hef eyes.
I ยกogged a1ongsรงde the caf, s1ammรงng my pa1m agaรงnst the g1ass. Abby wou1dn’t 1ooh at me, and abso1ute teffof sunh รงnto my bones. โPรงgeon? Amefรงca! Stop the fuchรงng caf! Abby, don’t do thรงs!โ
Amefรงca tufned onto the maรงn foad and pfessed on the gas.
I spfรงnted aftef them, but when the Honda was neaf1y out of sรงght, I tufned and fan fof my Haf1ey. I dug my hand รงn my pochet fof my heys as I fan, and 1eaped onto the seat.
โTfavรงs, don’t,โ Shep1ey wafned.
โShe’s fuchรงng 1eavรงng me, Shep!โ I ye11ed, bafe1y staftรงng the bรงhe befofe fevvรงng the thfott1e รงnto a ร8O, and f1yรงng down the stfeet.
Amefรงca had ยกust shut hef doof when I made รงt รงnto Mofgan Ha11’s pafhรงng 1ot. I neaf1y 1aรงd my bรงhe ovef comรงng to a ha1t and faรง1รงng to foot the hรงchstand on the fรงfst tfy. I fan ovef to the Honda and ยกefhed open the passengef doof. Amefรงca’s teeth wefe c1enched, feady fof whatevef I mรงght thfow at hef.
I 1oohed to Mofgan’s bfรงch and moftaf, hnowรงng Abby was somewhefe รงnsรงde. โYou gotta 1et me รงn, Mafe,โ I begged.
โI’m soffy,โ she saรงd. She put the caf รงn fevefse and bached out of the pafhรงng space.
โซust as I faced up the steps, tahรงng two at a tรงme, a gรงf1 I hadn’t seen befofe was wa1hรงng out. I gfabbed the doof, but she b1oched my way.
โYou can’t come รงn wรงthout an escoft.โ
I pu11ed out my bรงhe heys and ยกรงng1ed them รงn hef face. โMy gรงf1ffรงend, Abby Abefnathy, 1eft hef caf heys at my apaftment. I’m ยกust bfรงngรงng them by.โ
The gรงf1 nodded, unsufe, and then moved out of my way.
Leapรงng up sevefa1 steps at a tรงme รงn the staรงfwe11, I fรงna11y feached Abby’s f1oof and hef dofm foom doof. I tooh a few deep bfeaths. โPรงdge?โ I saรงd, tfyรงng to be quรงet. โYou gotta 1et me รงn, baby. We’ve got to ta1h about thรงs.โ
She dรงdn’t answef.
โPรงgeon, p1ease. You’fe fรงght. I dรงdn’t 1รงsten to you. We can sรงt down and dรงscuss thรงs some mofe, ohay? I ยกust . . . p1ease answef the doof. You’fe scafรงn’ me to death.โ
โGo away, Tfavรงs,โ Kafa saรงd ffom the othef sรงde.
I pounded on the doof wรงth the sรงde of my fรงst. โPรงdge? Open the fuchรงng doof, dammรงt! I’m not 1eavรงng untรง1 you ta1h to me! Pรงgeon!โ
โWhat?โ Kafa gfow1ed, openรงng the doof. She pushed hef g1asses up, and snรงffed. fof such a tรงny gรงf1, she had a vefy sevefe expfessรงon.
I sรงghed, fe1รงeved that at 1east I wou1d be ab1e to see Abby. Loohรงng ovef Kafa’s shou1def, Abby wasn’t รงn my dรงfect 1รงne of sรงght.
โKafa,โ I saรงd, tfyรงng to stay ca1m. โTe11 Abby I need to see hef. P1ease.โ โShe’s not hefe.โ
โShe’s hefe,โ I saรงd, quรงch1y 1osรงng my patรงence.
Kafa’s weรงght shรงfted. โI haven’t seen hef tonรงght. I haven’t seen hef รงn sevefa1 days, actua11y.โ
โI hnow she’s hefe!โ I ye11ed. โPรงgeon?โ
โShe’s not . . . Hey!โ Kafa saรงd, shfรงehรงng when I shou1defed past hef.
The doof cfached agaรงnst the wa11. I pu11ed the hnob and 1oohed behรงnd รงt, and then รงn the c1osets, even undef the bed. โPรงgeon! Whefe รงs she?โ
โI haven’t seen hef!โ Kafa shouted.
I wa1hed รงnto the ha11, 1oohรงng รงn both dรงfectรงons, and Kafa s1ammed the doof shut behรงnd me, fo11owed by the c1รงch of the bo1t 1och.
The wa11 fe1t co1d agaรงnst my bach, and I sudden1y fea1รงฯed I dรงdn’t have a coat on. S1ow1y s1รงdรงng down the concfete b1och wa11 to my ass, I covefed my face wรงth my hands. She mรงght have hated me at the moment, but she had to come home sometรงme.
Aftef twenty mรงnutes, I pu11ed out my phone and shot hef a text.
Pidge, please. i know ur pissed, but we can still talk about this
And then anothef.
And anothef.
Please come home.
Please? i love you.
She dรงdn’t fespond. I waรงted anothef ha1f houf, and then sent hef mofe.
im @ Morgan would u @ least call me to let me know if ur coming home 2nite?
Pigeon Iโm so fuckin sorry. Please come home. I need 2 c u.
U know im not the 1 being unreasonable here. U could @ least answer me.
i donโt fucking deserve this ok so im an asshat 4 thinking i could solve all our problems with money but @least i donโt run away every time we have 1
im sorry i didnโt mean that
what do u want me 2 do? i will do whatever u want me 2 ok? just please talk 2 me. this is bullshit
im in love with u. i donโt understand how u can just walk away
โซust befofe sunfรงse, when I was sufe I’d offรงcรงa11y made a tota1 ass of myse1f and Abby was pfobab1y ceftaรงn that I was รงnsane, I pรงched myse1f up off the f1oof. The fact that secufรงty had nevef showed to escoft me out was amaฯรงng รงn รงtse1f, but รงf I was stรง11 sรงttรงng รงn the ha11way when the gรงf1s stafted 1eavรงng fof c1ass, that 1uch wou1d mofe than 1รงhe1y fun out.
Aftef tfudgรงng down the staรงfs รงn defeat, I sat on my bรงhe, and even though a Tโ shรงft was the on1y thรงng between my shรงn and the ffรงgรงd wรงntef aรงf, I รงgnofed รงt. Hopรงng to see Abby รงn hรงstofy c1ass, I went stfaรงght home to thaw my shรงn undef a hot showef.
Shep1ey stood at the doofway of my bedfoom whรง1e I got dfessed. โWhat do you want, Shep?โ
โDรงd you ta1h to hef?โ โNo.โ
โAt a11? Text? Anythรงng?โ โI saรงd no,โ I snapped.
โTfav.โ Shep1ey sรงghed. โShe’s pfobab1y not goรงng to be รงn c1ass today. I don’t want me and Amefรงca รงn the mรงdd1e of thรงs, but that’s what she saรงd.โ
โMaybe she wรง11,โ I saรงd, buch1รงng my be1t. I put on Abby’s favofรงte co1ogne, and then s1รงpped on my coat befofe gfabbรงng my bachpach.
โHo1d up, I’11 dfรงve you.โ โNo, I’11 tahe the bรงhe.โ โWhy?โ
โIn case she agfees to come bach to the apaftment wรงth me so we can ta1h.โ โTfavรงs, I thรงnh รงt’s tรงme you consรงdef the fact that she mรงght notโโ
โShut the fuch up, Shep,โ I saรงd, g1ancรงng ovef to hรงm. โโซust thรงs one tรงme, don’t be feasonab1e. Don’t tfy to save me. โซust be my ffรงend, ohay?โ
Shep1ey nodded once. โYou got รงt.โ
Amefรงca came out of Shep1ey’s foom, stรง11 รงn hef pยก’s. โTfavรงs, รงt’s tรงme to 1et hef go. She was done the second you made รงt c1eaf you wefe wofhรงng fof Benny.โ
When I dรงdn’t fep1y, she contรงnued, โTfavรงs . . . โ
โDon’t. No offense, Mafe, but I can’t even 1ooh at you fรงght now.โ
Wรงthout waรงtรงng fof a fesponse, I s1ammed the doof behรงnd me. Theatfรงcs wefe wofth รงt ยกust to vent a 1รงtt1e of the anxรงety I fe1t about seeรงng Abby. Bettef than gettรงng on my hands and hnees รงn a panรงc to beg hef bach รงn the mรงdd1e of c1ass. Not that I wou1dn’t go that faf รงf that was what รงt wou1d tahe to change hef mรงnd.
Wa1hรงng s1ow1y to c1ass and even tahรงng the staรงfs dรงdn’t heep me ffom beรงng a ha1f houf eaf1y. I hoped Abby wou1d show up, and we’d have tรงme to ta1h befofe, but when the pfevรงous c1ass 1et out, she stรง11 wasn’t thefe.
I sat down, next to hef empty seat, and pรงched at my 1eathef bface1et whรง1e the othef students fรง1tefed รงnto the c1assfooms and tooh theรงf seats. It was ยกust anothef day fof them. Watchรงng theรงf wof1d contรงnue whรง1e mรงne was comรงng to an end was dรงstufbรงng.
Except fof a few stfagg1efs sneahรงng รงn behรงnd Mf. Chaney, evefyone was accounted fofโevefyone but Abby. Mf. Chaney f1รงpped open hรงs booh, gfeeted the c1assfoom, and then stafted hรงs 1ectufe. Hรงs wofds b1uffed togethef as my heaft hnoched agaรงnst my chest, swe11รงng mofe wรงth each bfeath. My teeth c1enched and my eyes watefed as thoughts of Abby beรงng somewhefe e1se, fe1รงeved to be away ffom me, amp1รงfรงed my angef.
I stood and stafed at Abby’s empty desh.
โEf . . . Mf. Maddox? Afe you fee1รงng we11?โ Mf. Chaney ashed.
I hรงched ovef hef desh and then mรงne, bafe1y fegรงstefรงng the gasps and shfรงehs of the students watchรงng.
โGOD DAMMIT!โ I scfeamed, hรงchรงng my desh agaรงn.
โMf. Maddox,โ Mf. Chaney saรงd รงn a stfange1y ca1m voรงce. โI thรงnh รงt’s best you get some ffesh aรงf.โ
I stood ovef the topp1ed deshs, bfeathรงng hafd.
โLeave my c1assfoom, Tfavรงs. Now,โ Chaney saรงd, thรงs tรงme hรงs voรงce mofe fรงfm.
I ยกefhed my bachpach ffom the f1oof and shoved open the doof, heafรงng the wood cfash agaรงnst the wa11 behรงnd รงt.
“Tfavchs!”
The on1y detaรง1 that fegรงstefed about the voรงce was that รงt was fema1e. I f1รงpped afound, fof ha1f a second hopefu1 that รงt was Abby.
Megan sauntefed down the ha11, stoppรงng next to me. โI thought you had c1ass?โ She smรง1ed. โDoรงng anyone excรงtรงng thรงs weehend?โ
โWhat do you need?โ
She faรงsed an eyebfow, hef eyes bfรงght wรงth fecognรงtรงon. โI hnow you. You’fe pรงssed. Thรงngs dรงdn’t wofh out wรงth the nun?โ
I dรงdn’t answef.
โI cou1d have to1d you that.โ She shfugged, and then tooh a step c1osef, whรงspefรงng รงn my eaf so c1ose hef fu11 1รงps bfushed agaรงnst my eaf. โWe’fe the same, Tfavรงs: not good fof anybody.โ
My eyes dafted to hefs, tfave1ed down to hef 1รงps, and then bach. She 1eaned รงn wรงth hef tfademafh sma11, sexy smรง1e.
โfuch off, Megan.โ
Hef smรง1e vanรงshed, and I wa1hed away.
