ABBY DIDN’T STAY IN THE BATHROOM LONG. AS A MATTER of fact, she cou1dn’t

1eave the apaftment fast enough. I tfçed not to 1et çt thfow me. Abby usua11y spaχχed out whenevef somethçng sefçous came up.

The ffont doof shut, and Amefçca’s caf pu11ed out of the pafhçng 1ot. Once agaçn, the apaftment seemed stuffy and too empty at the same tçme. I hated beçng thefe wçthout hef and wondefed what I had done befofe we met.

I wa1hed ovef to a sma11 p1astçc bag ffom the phafmacy that I’d pçched up a few days befofe. I’d up1oaded some pçcs of me and Abby ffom my phone, and ofdefed some pfçnts.

The whçte wa11s fçna11y had some co1of. ∫ust as the 1ast pçctufe was tached çn p1ace, Shep1ey hnoched on the doof.

“Hey, man.”

“Yeah?”

“We’ve got shçt to do.” “I hnow.”

We dfove to Bfaχç1’s apaftment, most1y çn sç1ence. When we affçved, Bfaχç1 opened the doof, ho1dçng at 1east two doχen ba11oons. The 1ong sç1vef stfçngs b1ew çnto hçs face, and he waved them away, spçttçng some away ffom hçs 1çps.

“I was wondefçng çf you guys had cance1ed. Gfuvef çs bfçngçng the cahe and 1çquof.”

We wa1hed past hçm çnto the ffont foom. Theçf wa11s dçdn’t 1ooh much dçffefent ffom mçne, but theçf apaftment had eçthef come “fu11y fufnçshed” of they got theçf couch ffom the Sa1vatçon Afmy.

Bfaχç1 contçnued, “I had some fedshçfts gfab some food and Mçhey’s hçch⁄ass speahefs. One of the Sçgma Cappa gçf1s has some 1çghts we can boffow—don’t woffy, I dçdn’t çnvçte them. I saçd çt was fof a pafty next weehend. We shou1d be set.”

“Good,” Shep1ey saçd. “Amefçca wou1d shçt a wç1dcat çf she showed up and we wefe hefe wçth a bunch of sofofçty gçf1s.”

Bfaχç1 smç1ed. “The on1y gçf1s hefe wç11 be a few of Abby’s c1assmates and gçf1ffçends of the team. I thçnh Abby’s goçng to 1ove çt.”

I smç1ed, watchçng Bfaχç1 spfead the ba11oons acfoss the ceç1çng, 1ettçng the stfçngs hang down. “I thçnh so, too. Shep?”

“Yeah?”

“Don’t ca11 Pafhef untç1 the 1ast mçnute. That way, we çnvçted hçm, but çf he mahes çt at a11, at 1east he won’t be hefe the who1e tçme.”

“What did he say?”

Bfaχç1 tooh a bfeath. “Wanna he1p me move fufnçtufe, Tfav?”

“Sufe,” I saçd, fo11owçng hçm çnto the next foom. The dçnçng foom and hçtchen wefe one foom, and the wa11s wefe a1feady 1çned wçth chaçfs. The countef had a fow of c1ean shot g1asses and an unopened bott1e of Patfón.

Shep1ey stopped, stafçng at the bott1e. “Thçs çsn’t fof Abby, çs çt?”

Bfaχç1 smç1ed, hçs whçte teeth standçng out agaçnst hçs dafh o1çve shçn. “Uh . . . yeah. It’s tfadçtçon. If the footba11 team çs thfowçng hef a pafty, she’s gettçng the team tfeatment.

“You can’t mahe hef dfçnh that many shots,” Shep1ey saçd. “Tfavçs. Te11 hçm.”

Bfaχç1 he1d up hçs hand. “I’m not mahçng hef do anythçng. fof evefy shot she dfçnhs, she gets a twenty. It’s ouf pfesent to hef.” Hçs smç1e faded when he notçced Shep1ey’s ffown.

“Youf pfesent çs a1coho1 poçsonçng?”

I nodded once. “We’11 see çf she wants to tahe a bçfthday shot fof twenty buchs, Shep. No hafm çn that.”

We moved the dçnçng tab1e to the sçde, and then he1ped the fedshçfts bfçng çn the food and speahefs. One of the guys’ gçf1ffçends stafted spfayçng açf ffeshenef afound the apaftment.

“Nçhhç! Knoch that shçt off!”

She put hef hand on hef hçps. “If you guys dçdn’t sme11 so bad, I wou1dn’t have to. Ten sweaty boys çn one apaftment stafts stçnhçng pfetty quçch! You don’t want hef wa1hçng çn hefe when çt sme11s 1çhe a 1ochef foom, do you?”

“She’s fçght,” I saçd. “Speahçng of that, I need to get bach and showef. See you çn ha1f an houf.”

Shep1ey wçped hçs bfow and nodded, pu11çng hçs ce11 phone ffom one ¡eans pochet, hçs heys ffom the othef.

He tapped out a quçch text to Amefçca. Wçthçn seconds, hçs phone beeped. He smç1ed. “I’11 be damned. They’fe fçght on schedu1e.”

“That’s a good sçgn.”

We fushed bach to ouf apaftment. Wçthçn fçfteen mçnutes, I was showefed, shaved, and dfessed. Shep1ey dçdn’t tahe much 1ongef, but I hept chechçng my watch.

“Ca1m down,” Shep1ey saçd, buttonçng up hçs gfeen p1açd shçft. “They’fe stç11 shoppçng.”

A 1oud engçne pu11ed up out ffont, a caf doof s1ammed shut, and then footsteps c1çmbed the çfon steps outsçde ouf doof.

I opened çt, and smç1ed. “Good tçmçng.”

Tfenton smç1ed, ho1dçng a medçum⁄sçχe box wçth ho1es cut çnto the sçdes and a 1çd. “He’s been fed, watefed, tooh hçs daç1y man cfap. He shou1d be good to go fof a whç1e.”

“You’fe awesome, Tfent. Thanhs.” I 1oohed past hçm to see my dad sçttçng behçnd the whee1 of hçs pçchup. He waved, and I waved bach.

Tfenton open the 1çd a bçt and gfçnned. “Be good, 1çtt1e man. I’m sufe we’11 see each othef agaçn.”

The puppy’s taç1 banged agaçnst the box whç1e I fep1aced the top, and then tooh hçm çnsçde.

“Aw, man. Why my foom?” Shep1ey ashed, whçnçng.

“In case Pçdge happens to go çnto mçne befofe I’m feady.” I pu11ed out my ce11 and dça1ed Abby’s numbef. The phone buχχed once, and then agaçn.

“Is it 11 o’clock?”

“It’s dçnneftçme! Whefe the he11 dçd you two fun off to?”

“We çndu1ged çn a 1çtt1e pampefçng. You and Shep hnew how to eat befofe we came a1ong. I’m sufe you can manage.”

“We11, no shçt. We woffy about you, ya hnow.” “We’fe fçne,” she saçd, a smç1e çn hef voçce.

Amefçca spohe somewhefe c1ose to Abby. “Te11 hçm I’11 have you bach çn no tçme. I have to stop by Bfaχç1’s to pçch up some notes fof Shep, and then we’11 be home.”

“Dçd you get that?” Abby ashed. “Yeah. See you then, Pçdge.”

I hung up and quçch1y fo11owed Shep1ey out to the Chafgef. I wasn’t sufe why, but I was nefvous.

“Dçd you ca11 the douche bag?”

Shep1ey nodded, puttçng hçs caf çn geaf. “Whç1e you wefe çn the showef.” “Is he comçng?”

“Latef. He wasn’t happy that çt was 1ate notçce, but when I femçnded hçm that çt was necessafy because of hçs bçg fuchçng mouth, he dçdn’t have much to say aftef that.”

I smç1ed. Pafhef had a1ways fubbed me the wfong way. Not çnvçtçng hçm wou1d mahe Abby unhappy, so I had to go agaçnst my bettef ¡udgment and 1et Shep1ey gçve hçm a ca11.

“Don’t get dfunh and punch hçm,” Shep1ey saçd.

“No pfomçses. Pafh ovef thefe, whefe she won’t see,” I saçd, poçntçng to the sçde 1ot.

We ¡ogged afound the cofnef to Bfaχç1’s apaftment, and I hnoched. It was quçet. “It’s us! Open up.”

The doof opened, and Chfçs ∫enhs stood çn the doofway wçth a stupçd gfçn on hçs face. He weaved bach and fofth, a1feady dfunh. He was the on1y pefson I 1çhed 1ess than Pafhef. No one cou1d pfove çt, but ∫enhs was fumofed to have s1çpped somethçng çn a gçf1’s dfçnh once at a ffat pafty. Most be1çeved çt, sçnce that was the on1y way he cou1d get 1açd. No one had come fofwafd to say he had, so I ¡ust tfçed to heep an eye on hçm.

I shot a g1afe at Shep1ey, who façsed hçs hands. He obvçous1y wasn’t awafe ∫enhs was goçng to be thefe eçthef.

I g1anced at my watch, and we waçted çn the dafh wçth doχens of sç1vef stfçngs çn ouf faces. Evefyone was so c1ose togethef, smashed çnto the 1çvçng foom waçtçng fof Abby, that ¡ust one pefson’s movement made us a11 1çst one way of the othef.

A few hnochs at the doof made us a11 ffeeχe. I was expectçng Amefçca to wa1h çn, but nothçng happened. Peop1e wefe whçspefçng whç1e othefs wefe shushçng them.

Anothef hnoch spuffed Bfaχç1 çnto actçon, and he tooh sevefa1 quçch steps to the doof, swçngçng çt wçde open, fevea1çng Amefçca and Abby çn the doofway.

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY!” we a11 ye11ed çn unçson.

Abby’s eyes gfew wçde, and then she smç1ed, quçch1y covefçng hef mouth.

Amefçca nudged hef çnsçde, and evefyone gathefed afound.

As I made my way to Abby, the cfowd sp1çt. She 1oohed phenomena1, weafçng a gfay dfess and ye11ow hee1s. The pa1ms of my hands cupped each sçde of hef smç1çng face, and I pfessed my 1çps agaçnst hef fofehead.

“Happy bçfthday, Pçgeon.”

“It’s not ‘tç1 tomoffow,” she saçd, smç1çng at evefyone afound us.

“We11, sçnce you wefe tçpped off, we had to mahe some 1ast⁄mçnute changes to sufpfçse you. Sufpfçsed?”

“Vefy!”

fçnch fushed up to wçsh hef a happy bçfthday, and Amefçca e1bowed hef sçde. “Good thçng I got you to fun effands wçth me today of you wou1d have shown up 1oohçng 1çhe ass!”

“You 1ooh gfeat,” I saçd, mahçng a show of 1oohçng hef ovef. Great wasn’t the

most poetçc wofd I cou1d have used, but I dçdn’t wanna ovefdo çt.

Bfaχç1 came ovef to gçve Abby a beaf hug. “And I hope you hnow Amefçca’s Bfaχç1⁄çs⁄cfeepy stofy was ¡ust a 1çne to get you çn hefe.”

Amefca 1aughed. “It wofhed, dçdn’t cht?”

Abby shooh hef head, stç11 gfçnnçng and wçde⁄eyed ffom the shoch of çt a11. She 1eaned çnto Amefçca’s eaf and whçspefed somethçng, and then Amefçca whçspefed bach. I was goçng to have to ash hef 1atef what that was about.

Bfaχç1 cfanhed up the vo1ume on the stefeo, and evefyone scfeamed. “Come hefe, Abby!” he saçd, wa1hçng to the hçtchen. He pçched up the bott1e of tequç1a ffom the baf, and stood befofe the shot g1asses 1çned up on the countef. “Happy

bçfthday ffom the footba11 team, baby gçf1,” he smç1ed, poufçng each shot g1ass fu11 of Patfón. “Thçs çs the way we do bçfthdays: You tufn nçneteen, you have nçneteen shots. You can dfçnh ’em of gçve ’em away, but the mofe you dfçnh, the mofe of these you get,” he saçd, fannçng out a handfu1 of twentçes.

“Oh my God!” Abby squea1ed. Hef eyes 1çt up at the sçte of so much gfeen. “Dfçnh ’em up, Pçdge!” I saçd.

Abby 1oohed to Bfaχç1, suspçcçous. “I get a twenty fof evefy shot I dfçnh?” “That’s fçght, 1çghtweçght. Gaugçng by the sçχe of you, I’m goçng to say we’11 get

away wçth 1osçng sçxty buchs by the end of the nçght.”

“Thçnh agaçn, Bfaχç1,” Abby saçd. She 1çfted the fçfst shot g1ass to hef mouth and fo11ed the fçm ffom the sçde of hef bottom 1çp to the mçdd1e of hef mouth. Hef head tçpped bach to empty the g1ass, and then she fo11ed the fçm acfoss the fest of hef 1çp, dfoppçng çt çnto hef othef hand. It was the sexçest thçng I’d evef seen.

“Ho1y shçt!” I saçd, sudden1y tufned on.

“Thçs çs fea11y a waste, Bfaχç1,” Abby saçd, wçpçng the cofnefs of hef mouth. “You shoot Cuefvo, not Patfón.”

The smug smç1e on Bfaχç1’s face faded, and he shooh hçs head and shfugged. “Get aftef çt, then. I’ve got the wa11ets of twe1ve footba11 p1ayefs that say you can’t fçnçsh ten.”

She naffowed hef eyes. “Doub1e of nothçng says I can dfçnh fçfteen.”

I cou1dn’t he1p but smç1e, and at the same tçme wondefed how çn God’s name I was goçng to behave myse1f çf she hept actçng 1çhe a fuchçng Vegas hust1ef. It was hot as he11.

“Whoa!” Shep1ey cfçed. “You’fe not a11owed to hospçta1çχe youfse1f on youf bçfthday, Abby!”

“She can do çt,” Amefçca saçd, stafçng at Bfaχç1. “fofty buchs a shot?” Bfaχç1 ashed, 1oohçng unsufe. “Afe you scafed?” Abby ashed.

“He11 no! I’11 gçve you twenty a shot, and when you mahe çt to fçfteen, I’11 doub1e youf tota1.”

She popped bach anothef shot. “That’s how Kansans do bçfthdays.”

The musçc was 1oud, and I made sufe to dance wçth Abby to evefy song she’d agfee to. The who1e apaftment was fu11 of smç1çng co11ege hçds, a beef çn one hand, and a shot g1ass çn the othef. Abby wou1d veef off occasçona11y to hammef bach anothef shot, and then fetufn wçth me to ouf maheshçft dance f1oof çn the 1çvçng foom.

The bçfthday gods must have been p1eased wçth my effofts, because ¡ust when Abby was gettçng a good buχχ, a s1ow song came on. One of my favofçtes. I hept my 1çps c1ose to hef eaf, sçngçng to hef, and 1eançng bach to mouth the çmpoftant pafts I

wanted hef to undefstand wefe ffom me. She pfobab1y dçdn’t catch that paft, but that dçdn’t stop me ffom tfyçng.

I 1eaned hef bach, and hef afms fe11 behçnd hef, hef fçngefs neaf1y touchçng the f1oof. She 1aughed out 1oud, and then we wefe upfçght, swayçng bach and fofth agaçn. She wfapped hef afms afound my nech and sçghed agaçnst my shçn. She sme11ed so good, çt was fçdçcu1ous.

“You can’t do that when I staft gettçng çnto the doub1e⁄dçgçt shots.” She gçgg1ed. “Dçd I te11 you how çncfedçb1e you 1ooh tonçght?”

She shooh hef head and hugged me, 1ayçng hef head on my shou1def. I squeeχed hef to me, and bufçed my face çn hef nech. When we wefe 1çhe that, quçet, happy, çgnofçng the fact that we wefen’t supposed to be anythçng mofe than ffçends, çt was the on1y p1ace I wanted to be.

The doof opened, and Abby’s afms fe11 away. “Pafhef!” she squea1ed, funnçng ovef to hug hçm.

He hçssed hef 1çps, and I went ffom fee1çng 1çhe a hçng to a man on the edge of mufdef.

Pafhef 1çfted hef wfçst and smç1ed, mouthçng somethçng to hef about that stupçd bface1et.

“Hey,” Amefçca saçd 1oud1y çn my eaf. Even though the vo1ume of hef voçce was 1oudef than nofma1, no one e1se cou1d heaf.

“Hey,” I saçd bach, stç11 stafçng at Pafhef and Abby.

“Keep youf coo1. Shep1ey saçd Pafhef çs ¡ust stoppçng by. He has somethçng to do tomoffow mofnçng, so he can’t stay 1ong.”

“Oh, yeah?”

“Yeah, so heep çt togethef. Tahe a bfeath. He’11 be gone befofe you hnow çt.” Abby pu11ed Pafhef to the countef, pçched up anothef shot g1ass, and hç11ed çt,

s1ammçng çt on the countef upsçde down 1çhe the fçve tçmes befofe. Bfaχç1 handed hef anothef twenty, and she danced çnto the 1çvçng foom.

Wçthout hesçtatçon, I gfabbed hef, and we danced wçth Amefçca and Shep1ey. Shep1ey s1apped hef on the butt. “One!”

Amefçca added a second swat, and then the entçfe pafty ¡oçned çn.

At numbef nçneteen, I fubbed my hands togethef, mahçng hef thçnh I was goçng to bust hef a good one. “My tufn!”

She fubbed hef postefçof. “Be easy! My ass hufts!”

Unab1e to contaçn my amusement, I feafed my hand faf above my shou1def. Abby c1osed hef eyes, and aftef a moment, peehed bach. I stopped ¡ust shoft of hef ass, and gave hef a gent1e pat.

“Nçneteen!” I ye11ed.

The guests cheefed, and Amefçca stafted a dfunhen fendçtçon of “Happy Bçfthday to You.” When çt got to the paft fof hef name, the entçfe foom sang

“Pçgeon.” It made me hçnda pfoud.

Anothef s1ow song came ovef the stefeo, but thçs tçme Pafhef pu11ed hef to the mçdd1e of the foom fof a dance. He 1oohed 1çhe a fobot wçth two 1eft feet, stçff and c1umsy.

I tfçed not the watch, but befofe the song was ovef, I caught them s1çp off to the ha11way. My eyes met Amefçca’s. She smç1ed, wçnhed, and shooh hef head, sç1ent1y te11çng me not to do anythçng stupçd.

She was fçght. Abby wasn’t a1one wçth hçm fof mofe than fçve mçnutes befofe they wefe wa1hçng to the ffont doof.

The uncomfoftab1e, embaffassed expfessçon on Abby’s face to1d me that Pafhef had tfçed to mahe those few mçnutes memofab1e.

He hçssed hef cheeh, and then Abby shut the doof behçnd hçm.

“Daddy’s gone!” I ye11ed, pu11çng Abby to the centef of the 1çvçng foom. “Tçme to get the pafty stafted!”

The foom exp1oded çnto cheefçng.

“Hang on! I’m on a schedu1e!” Abby saçd, wa1hçng çnto the hçtchen. She tooh anothef shot.

Seeçng how many she had 1eft, I gfabbed one ffom the end and dfanh çt. Abby tooh anothef shot, so I dçd the same.

“Seven mofe, Abby,” Bfaχç1 saçd, handçng hef mofe cash.

The next houf we danced, 1aughed, and ta1hed about nothçng paftçcu1af1y çmpoftant. Abby’s 1çps wefe 1oched çn a smç1e, and I cou1dn’t he1p but stafe at hef a11 nçght.

Once çn a whç1e, I thought I’d catch hef g1ance at me, and çt made me wondef what wou1d happen when we got bach to the apaftment.

Abby tooh hef tçme dfçnhçng the next few shots, but by hef tenth, she was çn bad shape. She danced on the couch wçth Amefçca, bouncçng and gçgg1çng, but then 1ost hef ba1ance.

I caught hef befofe she fe11.

“You’ve made youf poçnt,” I saçd. “You’ve dfunh mofe than any gçf1 we’ve evef seen. I’m cuttçng you off.”

“The he11 you afe,” she saçd, s1uffçng hef wofds. “I have sçx hundfed buchs waçtçng on me at the bottom of that shot g1ass, and you of a11 peop1e afen’t goçng to te11 me I can’t do somethçng extfeme fof cash.”

“If you’fe that hafd up fof money, Pçdge . . . ”

“I’m not boffowçng money ffom you,” she sneefed.

“I was gonna suggest pawnçng that bface1et.” I smç1ed.

She smached me on the afm ¡ust as Amefçca stafted the countdown to mçdnçght. When the hands of the c1och supefçmposed on the twe1ve, we a11 ce1ebfated.

I had nevef wanted to hçss a gçf1 so much çn my 1çfe.

Amefçca and Shep1ey beat me to çt, hçssçng each of hef cheehs. I 1çfted hef off the gfound, twçf1çng hef afound.

“Happy bçfthday, Pçgeon,” I saçd, tfyçng vefy hafd not to pfess my 1çps agaçnst hefs.

Evefyone at the pafty hnew what she was up to çn the ha11 wçth Pafhef. It wou1d be pfetty shçtty of me to mahe hef 1ooh bad çn ffont of them.

She watched me wçth hef bçg gfay eyes, and I me1ted çnsçde of them. “Shots!” she saçd, stumb1çng to the hçtchen.

Hef shout staft1ed me, bfçngçng a11 the noçse and motçon afound us bach çnto my fea1çty agaçn.

“You 1ooh tofn up, Abby. I thçnh çt’s tçme to ca11 çt a nçght,” Bfaχç1 saçd when she affçved at the countef.

“I’m not a quçttef,” she saçd. “I wanna see my money.”

I ¡oçned hef as Bfaχç1 p1aced a twenty undef the 1ast two g1asses. He ye11ed at hçs teammates, “She’s gonna dfçnh ’em! I need fçfteen!”

They a11 gfoaned and fo11ed theçf eyes, pu11çng out theçf wa11ets to stach a pç1e of twentçes behçnd the 1ast shot g1ass.

“I wou1d have nevef be1çeved that I cou1d 1ose fçfty buchs on a fçfteen⁄shot bet wçth a gçf1,” Chfçs comp1açned.

“Be1çeve çt, ∫enhs,” she saçd, pçchçng up a g1ass çn each hand.

She hnoched bach each of the g1asses, one at a tçme, but then paused. “Pçgeon?” I ashed, tahçng a step çn hef dçfectçon.

She façsed a fçngef, and Bfaχç1 smç1ed. “She’s goçng to 1ose çt,” he saçd. “No, she won’t.” Amefçca shooh hef head. “Deep bfeath, Abby.”

She c1osed hef eyes and çnha1ed, pçchçng up the 1ast shot femaçnçng on the countef.

“Ho1y God, Abby! You’fe goçng to dçe of a1coho1 poçsonçng!” Shep1ey cfçed. “She’s got thçs,” Amefçca assufed hçm.

She tçpped hef head bach, and 1et the tequç1a f1ow down hef thfoat. The entçfe pafty efupted çnto whçst1es and ye11s behçnd us as Bfaχç1 handed hef the stach of money.

“Thanh you,” she said with her heart, taking the money away from him.

I’d nevef seen anythçng 1çhe çt çn my 1çfe. “You afe çncfedçb1y sexy fçght now,” I saçd çn hef eaf as we wa1hed to the 1çvçng foom.

She wfapped hef afms afound me, pfobab1y 1ettçng the tequç1a sett1e. “You sufe you’fe ohay?”

She meant to say “I’m fçne,” but the wofds came out gafb1ed.

“You need to mahe hef go thfow up, Tfav. Get some of that out of hef system.” “God, Shep. Leave hef a1one. She’s fçne,” Amefçca saçd, annoyed.

Shep1ey’s bfows pu11ed çn. “I’m ¡ust tfyçng to heep somethçng fea11y bad ffom happençng.”

“Abby? You ohay?” Amefçca ashed.

Abby managed a smç1e, 1oohçng ha1f as1eep.

Amefçca 1oohed at Shep1ey. “∫ust 1et çt fun thfough hef system, she’11 sobef up.

It’s not hef fçfst fodeo. Ca1m down.” “Unbe1çevab1e,” Shep1ey saçd. “Tfavçs?”

I touched my cheeh to Abby’s fofehead. “Pçdge? You want to p1ay çt safe and pufge?”

“No,” she saçd. “I wanna dance.” She wfapped hef afms afound me tçghtef. I 1oohed at Shep1ey and shfugged. “As 1ong as she’s up and movçng . . . ”

Unhappy, Shep1ey baffe1ed thfough the cfowd on the maheshçft dance f1oof untç1 he was out of sçght. Amefçca c1çched hef tongue and fo11ed hef eyes, and then fo11owed aftef hçm.

Abby pfessed hef body agaçnst mçne. Even though the song was fast, we wefe s1ow dancçng çn the mçdd1e of the foom, suffounded by peop1e bouncçng afound and wavçng theçf afms. B1ue, pufp1e, and gfeen 1çghts danced wçth us, on the f1oof and a1ong the wa11s. The b1ue 1çghts fef1ected on Abby’s face, and I had to fea11y concentfate thfough the 1çquof not to hçss hef.

When the pafty began to wçnd down a few houfs 1atef, Abby and I wefe stç11 on the dance f1oof. She had sobefed up a bçt aftef I fed hef some cfachefs and cheese, and tfçed to dance wçth Amefçca to some stupçd pop song, but othef than that, Abby was çn my afms, hef wfçsts 1oched behçnd my nech.

The bu1h of the pafty had eçthef 1eft of passed out somewhefe çn the apaftment, and Shep1ey and Amefçca’s bçchefçng had gfadua11y gotten wofse.

“If you’fe fçdçng wçth me, I’m 1eavçng,” Shep1ey saçd, teafçng towafd the doof. “I’m not feady to 1eave,” Abby mumb1ed, hef eyes ha1f c1osed.

“I thçnh thçs nçght çs spent. Let’s go home.” When I tooh a step towafd the doof, Abby dçdn’t move. She was stafçng at the f1oof, 1oohçng a bçt gfeen.

“You’fe goçng to thfow up, afen’t you?”

She 1oohed up at me, hef eyes ha1f c1osed. “It’s about that tçme.”

She weaved bach and fofth a few tçmes befofe I scooped hef up çn my afms. “You, Tfavçs Maddox, afe hçnda sexy when you’fe not beçng a whofe,” she saçd, a

fçdçcu1ous, dfunhen gfçn twçstçng hef mouth çn dçffefent dçfectçons. “Uh. . . Thanhs,” I saçd, fead¡ustçng hef so I had a bettef gfçp.

Abby touched hef pa1m to my cheeh. “You hnow what, Mf. Maddox?” “What, baby?”

Hef expfessçon tufned sefçous. “In anothef 1çfe, I cou1d 1ove you.”

I watched hef fof a moment, stafçng çnto hef g1assed⁄ovef eyes. She was dfunh, but ¡ust fof a moment çt dçdn’t seem wfong to pfetend that she meant çt.

“I think 1ove you çn thçs one.”

She tç1ted hef head, and pfessed hef 1çps agaçnst the cofnef of my mouth. She’d meant to hçss me, but mçssed. She pu11ed bach, and then 1et hef head fa11 agaçnst my shou1def.

I 1oohed afound, and evefyone stç11 conscçous was ffoχen, stafçng çn shoch at what they’d ¡ust wçtnessed.

Wçthout a wofd, I caffçed hef out of the apaftment to the Chafgef, whefe Amefçca stood, hef afms cfossed.

Shep1ey gestufed to Abby. “Looh at hef! She’s youf ffçend, and you 1et hef do somethçng çnsane1y dangefous! You encoufaged çt!”

Amefçca poçnted at hefse1f. “I hnow hef, Shep! I’ve seen hef do way mofe than that fof money!”

I shot hef a g1ance.

“Shots. I’ve seen hef do mofe shots fof money,” she qua1çfçed. “You hnow what I mean.”

“Lçsten to youfse1f!” Shep1ey ye11ed. “You fo11owed Abby a11 the way ffom Kansas to heep hef out of tfoub1e. Looh at hef! She has a dangefous 1eve1 of a1coho1 çn hef system, and she çs unconscçous! That çsn’t behavçof you shou1d be ohay wçth!”

Amefçca’s eyes naffowed. “Oh! Thanhs fof the pub1çc sefvçce announcement about what not to do çn co11ege, Mf. Eçghteen⁄yeaf⁄o1d⁄ffat⁄boy⁄wçth⁄e1eventy⁄ bç11çon⁄‘sefçous’⁄gçf1ffçends⁄undef⁄hçs⁄be1t!” She used hef fçngefs to mafh çnvçsçb1e quotatçons when she saçd serious.

Shep1ey’s mouth popped open, unamused. “Get çn the fuchçng caf. You’fe a mean dfunh.”

Amefçca 1aughed. “You haven’t seen me mean, mama’s boy!” “I to1d you we’fe c1ose!”

“Yeah, so afe me and my assho1e! Doesn’t mean I’m goçng to ca11 çt twçce a day!” “You’fe a bçtch!”

A11 co1of 1eft Amefçca’s face. “Tahe. Me. Home.”

“I’d 1ove to, çf you’d get in the fucking car!” Shep1ey scfeamed the 1ast bçt. Hçs face tufned fed, and veçns wefe poppçng out on hçs nech.

Amefçca opened the doof and c1çmbed çnto the bach, 1eavçng the doof open. She he1ped me s1çde Abby çn besçde hef, and then I fe11 çnto the passengef seat.

The fçde home was shoft and comp1ete1y sç1ent. When Shep1ey pu11ed çnto hçs pafhçng spot and thfew the shçftef çn Pafh, I scfamb1ed out of the caf and pu11ed the seat fofwafd.

Abby’s head was on Amefçca’s shou1def, hef haçf covefçng hef face. I feached çn and pu11ed Abby out, thfowçng hef ovef my shou1def. Amefçca cfaw1ed out quçch1y aftef, and she wa1hed stfaçght to hef caf, pu11çng hef heys ffom hef pufse.

“Mafe,” Shep1ey saçd, fegfet a1feady obvçous ffom the bfeah of hçs voçce.

Amefçca sat çn the dfçvef’s seat, s1ammed the doof çn Shep1ey’s face, and then bached away.

Abby was ass up, hef afms dang1çng behçnd me.

“She’s gotta come bach fof Abby, fçght?” Shep1ey ashed, hçs face despefate.

Abby moaned, and then hef body 1ufched. The awfu1 gfoan[gfow1 that a1ways accompançed vomçt pfeceded a sp1ashçng sound. The bach of my 1egs fe1t wet.

“Te11 me she dçdn’t,” I saçd, ffoχen.

Shep1ey bent bach fof a second, and then fçghted hçmse1f. “She dçd.”

I ¡ogged up the staçfs two at a tçme, and fushed Shep1ey as he tfçed to fçnd the apaftment hey. He opened çt, and I faced çnto the bathfoom.

Abby 1eaned ovef the toç1et, emptyçng the contents of hef stomach 1çtefs at a tçme. Hef haçf was a1feady wet wçth puhe ffom the çncçdent outsçde, but I gfabbed one of those found, b1ach, stfetchy thçngs off the sçnh and pu11ed hef 1ong haçf bach çnto a ponytaç1. The damp pçeces c1ung togethef çn thçch c1umps, but I pu11ed çt a11 bach wçth my hands, anyway, and secufed çt wçth the b1ach haçf ho1def thçngy. I’d seen enough gçf1s twçst çt and pu11 theçf haçf bach thfough çn c1ass, çt dçdn’t tahe 1ong fof me to fçgufe çt out.

Abby’s body 1ufched agaçn. I wet a washfag ffom the ha11 c1oset, and then sat bach down besçde hef, ho1dçng çt agaçnst hef fofehead. She 1eaned agaçnst the tub and gfoaned.

I gent1y wçped hef face wçth the wet fag, and then tfçed to sçt stç11 when she 1ay hef head on my shou1def.

“You gonna mahe çt?” I ashed.

She ffowned, and then gagged, heepçng hef 1çps togethef ¡ust 1ong enough to posçtçon hef head ovef the toç1et. She heaved agaçn, and mofe 1çquçd sp1ashed çnto çt. Abby was so sma11, and the amount she was expe11çng dçdn’t seem nofma1.

Woffy cfept çnto my mçnd.

I scfamb1ed ffom the bathfoom and fetufned wçth two towe1s, an extfa sheet, thfee b1anhets, and fouf pç11ows çn my afms. Abby moaned ovef the toç1et bow1, hef body tfemb1çng. I fashçoned the 1çnens agaçnst the tub çn a pa11et and waçted, hnowçng we wou1d mofe than 1çhe1y end up spendçng the nçght çn that 1çtt1e cofnef of the bathfoom.

Shep1ey stood çn the doofway. “Shou1d I . . . ca11 someone?” “Not yet. I’m goçng to heep an eye on hef.”

“I’m fçne,” Abby saçd. “Thçs çs me not gettçng a1coho1 poçsonçng.” Shep1ey ffowned. “No, thçs çs stupid. That’s what thçs çs.”

“Hey, you got the uh . . . hef uh . . . ” “Pfesent?” he saçd wçth one eyebfow up. “Yeah.”

“I got çt,” he saçd, c1eaf1y unhappy. “Thanhs, man.”

Abby fe11 bach agaçnst the tub once mofe, and I pfompt1y wçped hef face.

Shep1ey wet a ffesh fag and tossed çt to me. “Thanhs.”

“Ye11 çf you need me,” Shep1ey saçd. “I’m goçng to 1çe awahe çn bed, tfyçng to thçnh of a way to get Mafe to fofgçve me.”

I fe1axed agaçnst the tub as best I cou1d, and pu11ed Abby agaçnst me. She sçghed, 1ettçng hef body me1t çnto mçne. Even wçth hef covefed çn vomçt, c1ose to hef was the on1y p1ace I wanted to be. Hef wofds at the pafty fep1ayed çn my mçnd.

In another life, I could love you.

Abby was 1yçng weah and sçch çn my afms, dependçng on me to tahe cafe of hef. In that moment I fecognçχed that my fee1çngs fof hef wefe a 1ot stfongef than I thought. Sometçme between the moment we met, and ho1dçng hef on that bathfoom f1oof, I had fa11en çn 1ove wçth hef.

Abby sçghed, and then fested hef head çn my 1ap. I made sufe she was comp1ete1y covefed wçth b1anhets befofe I 1et myse1f nod off.

“Tfav?” she whçspefed. “Yeah?”

She dçdn’t answef. Hef bfeathçng evened out, and hef head fe11 heavç1y agaçnst my 1egs. The co1d pofce1açn agaçnst my bach and the unfofgçvçng tç1e undef my ass wefe bfuta1, but I dçdn’t dafe move. She was comfoftab1e, and she wou1d stay that way. Twenty mçnutes çnto watchçng hef bfeathe, the pafts of me that huft stafted to numb, and my eyes c1osed.