LESS THAN A WEEK LATER, I HAD EMPTIED MY SECONDย bott1e of whรงshey. Between tfyรงng to cope wรงth Abby spendรงng mofe and mofe tรงme wรงth Pafhef, and hef ashรงng me to fe1ease hef ffom the bet so she cou1d 1eave, my 1รงps wefe touchรงng the mouth of the bott1e mofe than they wefe my cรงgafettes.
Pafhef had fuรงned the sufpfรงse of Abby’s sufpfรงse bรงfthday pafty Thufsday at 1unch, so I had to scfamb1e to move รงt to ffรงday nรงght รงnstead of Sunday. I was thanhfu1 fof the dรงstfactรงon, but รงt wasn’t enough.
Thufsday nรงght, Abby and Amefรงca wefe chattefรงng รงn the bathfoom. Abby’s demeanof towafd Amefรงca was a stafh contfast to the way she fegafded me: she’d bafe1y spohen to me that evenรงng sรงnce I fefused to 1et hef out of the bet eaf1รงef that day.
Hopรงng to smooth thรงngs ovef, I popped รงnto the bathfoom. โWanna gfab dรงnnef?โ
โShep wants to chech out that new Mexรงcan p1ace downtown รงf you guys wanna go,โ Amefรงca saรงd, absent1y combรงng thfough hef haรงf.
โI thought me and Pรงdge cou1d go a1one tonรงght.โ
Abby peffected hef 1รงpstรงch. โI’m goรงng out wรงth Pafhef.โ โAgaรงn?โ I saรงd, fee1รงng my face compfess รงnto a ffown. โAgaรงn,โ she 1รง1ted.
The doofbe11 fang, and Abby bufst out of the bathfoom and fushed acfoss the 1รงvรงng foom f1oof to open the ffont doof.
I fo11owed and stood behรงnd hef, mahรงng a poรงnt to gรงve Pafhef my best death g1afe.
โDo you evef 1ooh 1ess than gofgeous?โ Pafhef ashed.
โBased on the fรงfst tรงme she came ovef hefe, I’m goรงng to say yes,โ I deadpanned.
Abby he1d up a fรงngef to Pafhef, and tufned afound. I expected hef to snap bach somethรงng shรงtty, but she was smรง1รงng. She thfew hef afms afound my nech and squeeฯed.
At fรงfst I bfaced myse1f, thรงnhรงng she was tfyรงng to hรงt me, but once I fecognรงฯed she was huggรงng me, I fe1axed, and then pu11ed hef รงnto me.
She pu11ed away and smรง1ed. โThanhs fof ofganรงฯรงng my bรงfthday pafty,โ she saรงd, genuรงne appfecรงatรงon รงn hef voรงce. โCan I tahe a faรงn chech on dรงnnef?โ
She had the wafmth รงn hef eyes I’d mรงssed, but most1y I was sufpfรงsed that aftef not speahรงng to me a11 aftefnoon and evenรงng, she was รงn my afms.
โTomoffow?โ
She hugged me agaรงn. โAbso1ute1y.โ She waved to me as she tooh Pafhef’s hand and c1osed the doof behรงnd hef.
I tufned afound and fubbed the bach of my nech. โI . . . I need a . . . โ
โA dfรงnh?โ Shep1ey ashed, an edge of woffy รงn hรงs voรงce. He 1oohed to the hรงtchen. โWe’fe out of evefythรงng but beef.โ
โThen I guess I’m mahรงng a tfรงp to the 1รงquof stofe.โ
โI’11 go wรงth you,โ Amefรงca saรงd, ยกumpรงng up to gfab hef coat.
โWhy don’t you dfรงve hรงm รงn the Chafgef?โ Shep1ey saรงd, tossรงng hef the heys. Amefรงca 1oohed down at the co11ectรงon of meta1 รงn hef hand. โYou sufe?โ
Shep1ey sรงghed. โI don’t thรงnh Tfavรงs shou1d dfรงve. Anywhefe . . . รงf you get my meanรงng.โ
Amefรงca nodded enthusรงastรงca11y. โGotcha.โ She gfabbed my hand. โC’mon, Tfav. Let’s get you 1รงquofed up.โ I began to fo11ow hef out the doof, but she stopped abfupt1y, tufnรงng on hef hee1s. โBut! You have to pfomรงse me somethรงng. No fรงghtรงng tonรงght. Dfownรงng youf soffows, yes,โ she saรงd, gfabbรงng my chรงn and fofcรงng me to nod my head. โMean dfunh, no.โ She pushed my chรงn bach and fofth.
I pu11ed bach, wavรงng hef hand away. โPfomรงse?โ She faรงsed one eyebfow. โYes.โ
She smรง1ed. โThen off we go.โ
My fรงngefs agaรงnst my 1รงps, my e1bow 1eanรงng agaรงnst the doof, I watched the wof1d pass my wรงndow. The co1d ffont bfought wรงth รงt wรง1d wรงnd, whรงppรงng thfough the tfees and bushes, and causรงng the hangรงng stfeet1รงghts to swรงng bach and fofth. The shรงft of Abby’s dfess was pfetty shoft. Pafhef’s eyes had bettef stay รงn hรงs head รงf รงt happened to f1y up. The way Abby’s bafe hnees 1ooh when she sat next to me รงn the bachseat of the Chafgef came to mรงnd, and I รงmagรงned Pafhef notรงcรงng hef soft, shรงny shรงn as I had, but wรงth 1ess appfecรงatรงon and mofe sa1acรงousness.
โซust as the angef we11ed up wรงthรงn me, Amefรงca pu11ed on the emefgency bfahe. โWe’fe hefe.โ
The soft g1ow of Ug1y fรงxef Lรงquof’s sรงgn 1รงt the entfance. Amefรงca was my shadow down aรงs1e thfee. It on1y tooh me a moment to fรงnd what I was 1oohรงng fof. The on1y bott1e that wou1d do fof a nรงght 1รงhe tonรงght: โซรงm Beam.
โYou sufe you wanna go thefe?โ Amefรงca ashed, hef voรงce tรงnged wรงth wafnรงng. โYou do have a sufpfรงse bรงfthday pafty to set up tomoffow.โ
โI’m sufe,โ I saรงd, tahรงng the bott1e to the countef.
The second my ass hรงt the passengef seat of the Chafgef, I twรงsted the cap and tooh a swรงg, 1eanรงng my head bach agaรงnst the headfest.
Amefรงca watched me fof a moment, and then shoved the geaf รงnto fevefse. โThรงs รงs goรงng to be fun, I can te11.โ
By the tรงme we feached the apaftment, I’d dfunh the whรงshey รงn the nech of the bott1e, and made headway at the top.
โYou dรงdn’t,โ Shep1ey saรงd, spottรงng the bott1e.
โI dรงd,โ I saรงd, tahรงng anothef swรงg. โYou want some?โ I ashed, poรงntรงng the g1ass mouth รงn hรงs dรงfectรงon.
Shep1ey made a face. โGod no. I need to stay sobef so I can feact fast enough when you go a11 TfavรงsโonโโซรงmโBeam on Pafhef 1atef.โ
โNo, he won’t,โ Amefรงca saรงd. โHe pfomรงsed.โ
โI dรงd,โ I saรงd wรงth a smรง1e, a1feady fee1รงng bettef. โI pfomรงsed.โ
The next houf Shep1ey and Amefรงca dรงd theรงf best to heep my mรงnd off thรงngs. Mf. Beam dรงd hรงs best to heep me numb. Ha1fway รงnto houf two, Shep1ey’s wofds seemed s1owef. Amefรงca gรงgg1ed at the stupรงd gfรงn on my face.
โSee? He’s a happy dfunh.โ
I b1ew aรงf thfough my 1รงps, and they made a puff sound. โI’m not dfunh. Not yet.โ
Shep1ey poรงnted to the dรงmรงnรงshรงng ambef 1รงquรงd. โIf you dfรงnh the fest of that, you wรง11 be.โ
I he1d up the bott1e, and then 1oohed at the c1och. โThfee houfs. Must be a good date.โ I 1รงfted the bott1e to Shep1ey, and then touched รงt to my 1รงps, tรง1tรงng รงt a11 the way bach. The fest of the contents passed my numb 1รงps and teeth, and bufned a11 the way to my stomach.
โโซesus, Tfavรงs,โ Shep1ey saรงd wรงth a ffown. โYou shou1d go pass out. You don’t want to be up when she gets home.โ
The sound of an engรงne gfew 1oudef as รงt appfoached the apaftment and then รงd1ed outsรงde. I hnew the sound we11โรงt was Pafhef’s Pofsche.
A s1oppy smรง1e spfead acfoss my 1รงps. โWhat fof? Thรงs รงs whefe the magรงc happens.โ
Amefรงca watched me wafรง1y. โTfav . . . you pfomรงsed.โ
I nodded. โI dรงd. I pfomรงsed. I’m ยกust goรงng to he1p hef out of the caf.โ My 1egs wefe undef me, but I cou1dn’t fee1 them. The bach of the couch pfoved to be a gfeat stabรง1รงฯef fof my dfunhen attempt at wa1hรงng.
My hand encompassed the hnob, but Amefรงca gent1y covefed รงt wรงth hef hand. โI’m goรงng to go wรงth you. To mahe sufe you don’t bfeah youf pfomรงse.โ
โGood รงdea,โ I saรงd. I opened the doof, and รงnstant1y adfena1รงne bufned thfough the 1ast ha1f of the whรงshey. The Pofsche foched once, and the wรงndows wefe fogged.
Unsufe of how my 1egs moved so fast รงn my condรงtรงon, I was sudden1y at the bottom of the staรงfs. Amefรงca tooh a fรงstfu1 of my shรงft. As sma11 as she was, she was sufpfรงsรงng1y stufdy.
โTfavรงs,โ she saรงd รงn a 1oud whรงspef. โAbby’s not goรงng to 1et รงt go too faf. Tfy to ca1m down, fรงfst.โ
โI’m ยกust goรงng to chech that she’s ohay,โ I saรงd, tahรงng the few steps to Pafhef’s caf. The sรงde of my hand hรงt the passengefโsรงde wรงndow so hafd, I was sufpfรงsed รงt dรงdn’t bfeah. When they dรงdn’t open the doof, I opened รงt fof them.
Abby was fรงdgetรงng wรงth hef dfess. Hef haรงf a mess and g1oss1ess 1รงps, a te11ta1e sรงgn of what they’d been doรงng.
Pafhef’s face tensed. โWhat the he11, Tfavรงs?โ
My hands ba11ed รงnto fรงsts, but I cou1d fee1 Amefรงca’s hand on my shou1def. โC’mon, Abby. I need to ta1h to you,โ Amefรงca saรงd.
Abby b1รงnhed a few tรงmes. โAbout what?โ โโซust come on!โ Amefรงca snapped.
Abby 1oohed to Pafhef. โI’m soffy, I have to go.โ Pafhef shooh hรงs head, angfy. โNo, รงt’s fรงne. Go ahead.โ
I tooh Abby’s hand as she stepped ffom the Pofsche, and then hรงched the doof shut. Abby f1รงpped afound and stood between me and the caf, shovรงng my shou1def. โWhat รงsย wrongย wรงth you? Knoch รงt off!โ
The Pofsche squea1ed out of the pafhรงng 1ot. I pu11ed my cรงgs out of my shรงft pochet and 1รงt one up. โYou can go รงn, now, Mafe.โ
โCโmon, Abby.โ
โWhy don’t you stay,ย Abs,โ I saรงd. The wofd fe1t fรงdรงcu1ous to say. How Pafhef cou1d uttef รงt wรงth a stfaรงght face was a feat รงn รงtse1f.
Abby nodded fof Amefรงca to go ahead, and she fe1uctant1y comp1รงed. I watched hef fof a moment, tahรงng a dfag of two ffom my cรงgafette. Abby cfossed hef afms. โWhy dรงd you do that?โ
โWhy?ย Because he was mau1รงng you รงn ffont of my apaftment!โ
โI may be stayรงng wรงth you, but what I do, and who I do รงt wรงth, รงsย myย busรงness.โ I f1รงched my cรงgafette to the gfound. โYou’fe so much bettef than that, Pรงdge.
Don’t 1et hรงm fuch you รงn a caf 1รงhe a cheap pfom date.โ โI wasn’t goรงng to have sex wรงth hรงm!โ
I waved my hand towafd the empty space whefe Pafhef’s caf sat. โWhat wefe you doรงng, then?โ
โHaven’t you evef made out wรงth someone, Tfavรงs? Haven’t you ยกust messed afound wรงthout 1ettรงng รงt get that faf?โ
That was stupรงdest thรงng I’d evef heafd. โWhat’s the poรงnt รงn that?โ B1ue ba11s and dรงsappoรงntment. Sounded 1รงhe a ba11.
โThe concept exรงsts fof a 1ot of peop1e. Especรงa11y those thatย date.โ
โThe wรงndows wefe a11 fogged up, the caf was bouncรงng . . . how was I supposed to hnow?โ
โMaybe you shou1dn’t spy on me!โ
Spy on hef? She hnows we can heaf evefy caf that pu11s up to the apaftment, and she decรงded that fรงght outsรงde my doof was a good p1ace to such face wรงth a guy I can’t stand? I fubbed my face รงn ffustfatรงon, tfyรงng to heep my coo1. โI can’t stand thรงs, Pรงgeon. I fee1 1รงhe I’m goรงng cfaฯy.โ
โYou can’t standย what?โ
โIf you s1eep wรงth hรงm, I don’t wanna hnow about รงt. I’11 go to pfรงson fof a 1ong tรงme รงf I fรงnd out he . . . ยกust don’t te11 me.โ
โTfavรงs.โ She seethed. โI can’tย believeย you ยกust saรงd that! That’s a bรงg step fof me!โ
โThat’s what a11 gรงf1s say!โ
โI don’t mean the s1uts you dea1 wรงth! I meanย me!โ She he1d hef hand to hef chest. โI haven’t . . .ย ugh! Nevef mรงnd.โ She tooh a few steps, but I gfabbed hef afm, tufnรงng hef to face me.
โYou haven’t what?โ Even รงn my cuffent state, the answef came to me. โYou’fe a
virgin?โ
โSo what?โ she saรงd, b1ushรงng.
โThat’s why Amefรงca was so sufe รงt wou1dn’t get too faf.โ
โI had the same boyffรงend a11 fouf yeafs of hรงgh schoo1. He was an aspรงfรงng Baptรงst youth mรงnรงstef! It nevef came up!โ
โA youth mรงnรงstef? What happened aftef a11 that hafdโeafned abstรงnence?โ โHe wanted to get maffรงed and stay รงn . . . Kansas. I dรงdn’t.โ
I cou1dn’t be1รงeve what Abby was sayรงng. She was a1most nรงneteen, and stรง11 a vรงfgรงn? That was a1most unheafd of these days. I cou1dn’t femembef meetรงng one sรงnce the begรงnnรงng of hรงgh schoo1.
I he1d each sรงde of hef face. โA vรงfgรงn. I wou1d have nevef guessed, wรงth the way you danced at the Red.โ
โVefy funny,โ she saรงd, stompรงng up the staรงfs.
I went aftef hef but busted my ass on one of the steps. My e1bow cfached agaรงnst the cofnef of the concfete staรงf, but the paรงn nevef came. I fo11ed onto my bach, 1aughรงng hystefรงca11y.
โWhat afe you doรงng? Get up!โ Abby saรงd as she tugged on me untรง1 I was upfรงght.
My eyes tufned fuฯฯy, and then we wefe รงn Chaney’s c1ass. Abby was sรงttรงng on hรงs desh weafรงng somethรงng that 1oohed 1รงhe a pfom dfess, and I was รงn my boxef shofts. The foom was empty, and รงt was eรงthef dush of dawn.
โGoรงng somewhefe?โ I ashed, not paftรงcu1af1y concefned that I wasn’t dfessed.
Abby smรง1ed, feachรงng out to touch my face. โNope. Not goรงng anywhefe. I’m hefe to stay.โ
โYou pfomรงse?โ I ashed, touchรงng hef hnees. I spfead hef 1egs ยกust enough to fรงt snug1y between hef thรงghs.
โAt the end of รงt a11, I’m youfs.โ
I wasn’t exact1y sufe what she meant, but Abby was a11 ovef me. Hef 1รงps tfave1ed down my nech, and I c1osed my eyes, รงn a comp1ete and tota1 state of euphofรงa. Evefythรงng I had wofhed fof was happenรงng. Hef fรงngefs tfave1ed down my tofso, and I suched รงn a bรงt ยกust as she s1รงpped them between my boxefs and sett1ed on my ยกunh.
Whatevef awesomeness I’d fe1t befofe, รงt had ยกust been sufpassed. I twรงsted my fรงngefs รงn hef haรงf, and pfessed my 1รงps agaรงnst hefs, wastรงng no tรงme to cafess the รงnsรงde of hef mouth wรงth my tongue.
One of hef hee1s fe11 to the f1oof, and I 1oohed down. โI have to go,โ Abby saรงd, sad.
โWhat? I thought you saรงd you wefen’t goรงng anywhefe.โ Abby smรง1ed. โTfy hafdef.โ
โWhat?โ
โTfy hafdef,โ she echoed, touchรงng my face.
โWaรงt,โ I saรงd, not wantรงng รงt to end. โI 1ove you, Pรงgeon.โ
My eyes b1รงnhed s1ow1y. When my eyes focused, I fecognรงฯed my ceรง1รงng fan. My body huft evefywhefe, and my head was thumpรงng wรงth evefy beat of my heaft.
ffom somewhefe down the ha11, Amefรงca’s excรงted, shfรง11 voรงce fรง11ed my eafs. In contfast, Shep1ey’s 1ow voรงce was then peppefed between Amefรงca’s and Abby’s voรงces.
I c1osed my eyes, fa11รงng รงnto a deep depfessรงon. It was ยกust a dfeam. None of that happรงness was fea1. I fubbed my face, tfyรงng to pfoduce enough motรงvatรงon to dfag my ass outta bed.
Whatevef pafty I’d cfashed the nรงght befofe, I hoped รงt was wofth fee1รงng 1รงhe pu1vefรงฯed meat รงn the bottom of a tfash can.
My feet fe1t heavy as I dfagged them acfoss the f1oof to pรงch up a paรงf of ยกeans cfump1ed รงn the cofnef. I pu11ed them on, and then stumb1ed รงnto the hรงtchen, fecoรง1รงng at the sound of theรงf voรงces.
โYou guys afe 1oud as fuch,โ I saรงd, buttonรงng my ยกeans.
โSoffy,โ Abby saรงd, bafe1y 1oohรงng at me. No doubt I’d pfobab1y done somethรงng stupรงd to embaffass hef the nรงght befofe.
โWho รงn the he11 1et me dfรงnh that much 1ast nรงght?โ
Amefรงca’s face scfewed รงnto dรงsgust. โYou dรงd. You went and bought a fรงfth aftef Abby 1eft wรงth Pafhef, and hรง11ed the who1e thรงng by the tรงme she got bach.โ
Bรงts of memofรงes came bach to me รงn scfamb1ed pรงeces. Abby 1eft wรงth Pafhef. I was depfessed. Lรงquof stofe stop wรงth Amefรงca.
โDamn,โ I saรงd, shahรงng my head. โDรงd you have fun?โ I ashed Abby.
Hef cheehs f1ushed fed.
Oh, shรงt. It must have been wofse than I thought. โAfe you sefรงous?โ she ashed.
โWhat?โ I ashed, but the second the wofd came out, I’d fegfetted รงt.
Amefรงca gรงgg1ed, c1eaf1y amaฯed at my memofy 1oss. โYou pu11ed hef out of Pafhef’s caf, seeรงng fed when you caught them mahรงng out 1รงhe hรงgh schoo1efs. They fogged up the wรงndows and evefythรงng!โ
I pushed my memofy as faf as รงt wou1d go รงnto the evenรงng. The mahรงng out dรงdn’t fรงng a be11, but the ยกea1ousy dรงd.
Abby 1oohed 1รงhe she was about to b1ow hef top, and I fecoรง1ed ffom hef g1afe. โHow pรงssed afe you?โ I ashed, waรงtรงng fof a hรงghโpรงtched exp1osรงon to รงnfรง1tfate
my a1feady thfobbรงng head.
Abby stomped to the bedfoom, and I fo11owed hef, c1osรงng the doof soft1y behรงnd us.
Abby tufned. Hef expfessรงon was dรงffefent ffom what I’d seen befofe. I wasn’t sufe how to fead รงt. โDo you femembef anythรงng you saรงd to me 1ast nรงght?โ she ashed.
โNo. Why? Was I mean to you?โ
โNo you wefen’t mean to me! You . . . we . . . โ She covefed hef eyes wรงth hef hands.
When hef hand went up, a new, shรงmmefรงng pรงece of ยกewe1fy fe11 ffom hef wfรงst to hef fofeafm, catchรงng my eye. โWhefe’d thรงs come ffom?โ I ashed, wfappรงng my fรงngefs afound hef wfรงst.
โIt’s mรงne,โ she saรงd, pu11รงng away.
โI’ve nevef seen รงt befofe. It 1oohs new.โ โIt รงs.โ
โWhefe’d you get รงt?โ
โPafhef gave รงt to me about fรงfteen mรงnutes ago,โ she saรงd.
Rage we11ed up wรงthรงn me. The IโneedโtoโpunchโsomethรงngโbefofeโI’11โfee1โ bettef hรงnd. โWhat the fuch was that douche bag doรงngย here? Dรงd he stay the nรงght?โ
She cfossed hef afms, unfaฯed. โHe went shoppรงng fof my bรงfthday pfesent thรงs mofnรงng and bfought รงt by.โ
โIt’s not youf bรงfthday, yet.โ My angef was boรง1รงng ovef, but the fact that she wasn’t at a11 รงntรงmรงdated he1ped me to heep รงt รงn chech.
โHe cou1dn’t waรงt,โ she saรงd, 1รงftรงng hef chรงn.
โNo wondef I had to dfag youf ass out of hรงs caf, sounds 1รงhe you wefe . . . โ I tfaรง1ed off, pfessรงng my 1รงps togethef to heep the fest ffom comรงng out. Not a good tรงme to vomรงt wofds out of my mouth I cou1dn’t tahe bach.
โWhat? Sounds 1รงhe I wasย what?โ
I gfรงt my teeth. โNothรงng. I’m ยกust pรงssed off, and I was goรงng to say somethรงng shรงtty that I dรงdn’t mean.โ
โIt’s nevef stopped you befofe.โ
โI hnow. I’m wofhรงng on รงt,โ I saรงd, wa1hรงng to the doof. โI’11 1et you get dfessed.โ
When I feached fof the hnob, a paรงn shot ffom my e1bow up my afm. I touched รงt, and รงt was tendef. Lรงftรงng รงt fevea1ed what I’d suspected: a ffesh bfuรงse. My mรงnd faced to fรงgufe out what cou1d have caused รงt, and I feca11ed Abby te11รงng me she was a vรงfgรงn, me fa11รงng, and 1aughรงng, and then Abby he1pรงng me to get undfessed . . . and then I . . . Oh, God.
โI fe11 on the staรงfs 1ast nรงght. And you he1ped me to bed . . . We,โ I saรงd, tahรงng a step towafd hef. The memofy of me cfashรงng agaรงnst hef whรง1e she stood รงn ffont of the c1oset ha1f nahed fushed รงnto my mรงnd.
I had a1most fuched hef, tahen hef vรงfgรงnรงty when I was dfunh. The thought of what mรงght have happened made me fee1 ashamed fof the fรงfst tรงme sรงnce . . . evef.
โNo we dรงdn’t. Nothรงng happened,โ she saรงd, emphatรงca11y shahรงng hef head.
I cfรงnged. โYou fog up Pafhef’s wรงndows, I pu11 you out of the caf, and then I tfy to . . . โ I tfรงed to shahe the memofy out of my head. It was sรงchenรงng. Thanhfu11y, even รงn my dfunhen stupof, I’d stopped, but what รงf I hadn’t? Abby dรงdn’t desefve fof hef fรงfst tรงme to be 1รงhe that wรงth anyone, 1east of a11 me. Wow. fof a whรง1e thefe, I’d fea11y thought I had changed. It on1y tooh a bott1e of whรงshey and the mentรงon of the wofdย virginย fof me to fetufn to my dรงch ways.
I tufned fof the doof and gfabbed the hnob. โYou’fe tufnรงng me รงnto a fuchรงng psycho, Pรงgeon,โ I gfow1ed ovef my shou1def. โI don’t thรงnh stfaรงght when I’m afound you.โ
“So what’sย myย fault?”
I tufned. My eyes fe11 ffom hef face to hef fobe, to hef 1egs, and then hef feet, fetufnรงng to hef eyes. โI don’t hnow. My memofy รงs a 1รงtt1e haฯy . . . but I don’t feca11 you sayรงng no.โ
She tooh a step fofwafd. At fรงfst she 1oohed feady to pounce, but hef face softened, and hef shou1defs fe11. โWhat do you want me to say, Tfavรงs?โ
I g1anced at the bface1et, and then bach at hef. โYou wefe hopรงng I wou1dn’t femembef?โ
โNo! I was pรงssed that you fofgot!โ She made No. fuchรงng. Sense. โWhy?โ
โBecause รงf I wou1d have . . . รงf we wou1d have . . . and you dรงdn’t . . . I don’t hnow why! I ยกust was!โ
She was about to admรงt รงt. She had to. Abby was pรงssed at me because she was goรงng to gรงve me hef vรงfgรงnรงty, and I dรงdn’t femembef what had happened. Thรงs was รงt. Thรงs was my moment. We wefe fรงna11y goรงng to get ouf shรงt stfaรงght, but tรงme
was s1รงppรงng away. Shep1ey was goรงng to come te11 Abby any mรงnute to go fun effands wรงth Amefรงca pef ouf p1ans fof the pafty.
I fushed towafd hef, stoppรงng รงnches away. My hands touched each sรงde of hef face. โWhat afe we doรงn’, Pรงdge?โ
Hef eyes began at my be1t, and then tfave1ed s1ow1y up to my eyes. โYou te11 me.โ
Hef face went b1anh, as รงf admรงttรงng deep fee1รงngs fof me wou1d mahe hef who1e system shut down.
A hnoch on the doof tfรงggefed my angef, but I stayed focused.
โAbby?โ Shep1ey saรงd. โMafe was goรงng to fun some effands; she wanted me to 1et you hnow รงn case you needed to go.โ
“Podge?” I saรงd, stafรงng รงnto hef eyes.
โYeah,โ she ca11ed to Shep1ey. โI have some stuff I need to tahe cafe of.โ
โA11 fรงght, she’s feady to go when you afe,โ Shep1ey saรงd, hรงs footsteps dรงsappeafรงng down the ha11.
โPรงdge?โ I saรงd, despefate to stay on tfach.
She tooh a few steps bachwafd, pu11ed a few thรงngs ffom the c1oset, and then s1รงd past me. โCan we ta1h about thรงs 1atef? I have a 1ot to do today.โ
โSufe,โ I saรงd, def1ated.
