That night, absent of any other plans, I accompanied
Christian to dinner at his friend Danteโs house.
Iโd met Dante before the night of the blizzard, but Iโd forgotten how intimidating he was. Even in a simple black shirt and pants, he commanded authority in a way that was different from Christian but equally as powerful.
Christian was a finely honed assassinโs blade sheathed in velvet; Dante was a hammer burning bright with deadly intent. Lethal and striking, with no ambiguity as to the damage he could inflict if crossed.
His fiancรฉe Vivian, on the other hand, was open-faced and friendly, with beautiful dark eyes and a warm smile.
Strangely enough, she was quick to grace everyone with that smileย exceptย Dante. The engaged pair hadnโt looked at each other once since Christian and I arrived.
โI didnโt realize you were dating Christian when I met you.โ Danteโs deep voice pulled me away from my curiosity and sent a pleasurable shiver down my spine.ย Italian accents.ย They did it for me every time. โNow it makes sense.โ
He bestowed a hard stare at Christian, who yawned.
For two people who claimed to be friends, they didnโt act particularly friendly toward each other.
โWhat makes sense?โ I asked.
โHow distracted heโs been lately.โ Dante swirled his wine in his glass. โWouldnโt you agree, Christian?โ
โMy record profits this quarter say otherwise,โ Christian drawled. He rested a hand on my thigh, the touch so casual yet possessive it sent heat arrowing to my core.
โItโs not your business thatโs in trouble,โ Dante said dryly.
Christian stared back at him with as much interest as someone listening to an insurance sales pitch. He rubbed his thumb over my bare skin. Softly, just once, but it was enough to cloud my thoughts.
I was so focused on the warm pressure of his hand I couldnโt focus on anything else, not even the delicious food.
What is wrong with me?
Iโd never lost my head over a guy like this. It was disconcerting.
Vivian cut through the brewing tension with a well-timed interruption. โYou and Stella make a beautiful couple.โ She shot him an amused glance. โI never thought Iโd see the day when Christian Harper would get a girlfriend.โ
โNeither did I, but Stella took me by surprise.โ The reply was so warm and intimate, I almost believed it.
My heart rate kicked up as the butterflies in my stomach went wild again.
I took a big gulp of wine to calm them down.
Itโs just for show. Itโs not real.
Christian donned casual affection as easily as he did one of his suits. There was no reason to believe his actions were anything more than playing into our ruse.
Other than our almost but not really kiss two weeks ago, heโd never indicated he wanted us to be real.
Sure, heโd gone above and beyond when it came to the stalker, but that was literally a matter of life and death. It didnโt mean heย likedย me.
Attracted to me? Possibly, but I didnโt think he wanted anything more than s*x.
My head spun. Everything felt too confusing after he kissed me today, even if it had just been to distract me from my nerves.
I firmly believed that if someone showed you who they were, believe them. And Christian had indicated time and time again that he wasnโt interested in a real relationship.
The day people stopped thinking they could change someone who didnโt want to be changed was the day fewer hearts got broken.
I wanted a real relationship one day, but I did not think for a second I could ever change Christian Harper.
Itโs just for show. Itโs not real.
Luckily, the tension blanketing the table gradually dissolved as dinner went on, drowned by good drinks and good food.
By the time the entrรฉe rolled around, even Vivian and Dante were talking to each other, though their conversations consisted mainly of asking the other to pass the food.
But no matter who was speaking, half of my attention remained tuned into Christian. He sat inches to my right, his presence a living, breathing distraction that crowded my lungs and clouded my thoughts.
Easy smiles, teasing drawls, and skin gilded gold by the dim lighting and wine-fueled haze.
It was my first time seeing him in such a relaxed group setting, and I finally understood how people could get sucked into his charm and underestimate him.
For all his care and concern toward me, Iโd never once doubted the ruthlessness that lay beneath his civilized veneer. But here, watching him laugh and joke with effortless grace, I almost believed he was nothing more than a wealthy playboy with only money and good times on his mind.
Christian turned to answer a question from Vivian, but his thumb made another slow sweep over my skin.
Itโs just for show. Itโs not real.
A tiny bead of sweat formed on my forehead. I was wearing a sleeveless dress, but I was burning up.
โHow did you and Christian meet?โ I asked Dante, both to distract from Christianโs touch and because I was truly curious.
I hadnโt met any of Christianโs other friends (Brock and Kage didnโt count since they worked for him), and I was dying to know their backstory.
โI was his first client.โ Dante leaned back in his chair. โHe was a kid fresh out of collegeโโ
โYouโre three years older than me,โ Christian cut in.
Our host ignored him. โI took a chance on him. Best and worst decision I ever made.โ
โWorst?โ Christian scoffed. โDo you remember what happened in Rome?โ He turned to me while Dante rolled his eyes. โWe were transporting jewels to a new store in the cityโฆโ
A smile tugged on my lips as he told the story about how he prevented the Russo Group from losing millions of dollars worth of diamonds.
Not because the story was funny, but because Christian was the most unguarded Iโd ever seen him.
He was so calculated and in control all the time that seeing him relax around friends was like getting a peek behind the curtain at the realย him.
It was nice.
Better than nice.
If he acted this way all the timeโฆ
I took another gulp of wine before I finished my thought.
Donโt go there.
โIf thereโs one thing you should know about him, Stella,โ Dante said after he finished. โItโs that he has an overinflated sense of self-importance. We couldโve handled the jewels situation without his help.โ
โTrust me, I know.โ A laugh rose in my throat when Christian slid a half-amused, half-exasperated glance in my direction.
โWhose side are you on?โ
โEasy.โ I grinned. โDanteโs.โ
The table broke into laughter while he squeezed my thigh and leaned closer until his mouth grazed my ear.
My pulse skipped.
โNot very girlfriend-like of you,โ he murmured.
โIf you canโt handle a little teasing, youโre not ready for a girlfriend,โ I whispered back.
His laughter wound through me like a ribbon of dark velvet.
I relaxed into my seat with a lingering smile.
The teasing, the joking, the opening up about his past (even if it was work-related)โฆwe almost felt like a real couple.
After dinner, Vivian took me on a tour of the penthouse while Dante and Christian discussed business.
Christianโs house was all clean lines and modern minimalism, but the Russosโ was a tasteful ode to decadence. Rich velvets, lush silks, and beautifully cut porcelain, all arranged in a manner that was extravagant but never tacky. The only thing that looked out of place was the hideous painting in their art gallery.
I had great respect for all creative works, but honestly, that piece looked like a cat had vomited all over the canvas.
โI donโt know why Dante bought that.โ Vivian sounded embarrassed. โHe usually has more discerning taste.โ
The compliment came out grudgingly, like she was reluctant to ascribe any positive qualities to her fiancรฉ.
I suppressed the urge to ask what happened between them.
It was rude to pry into other peopleโs business, especially when they were my hosts and Iโd just met them.
We almost made it back to the dining room when we heard voices drifting from a crack in Danteโs office door.
โโฆcanโt keep Magda forever,โ Dante said. โYou should be glad I didnโt throw it in the trash after the stunt you pulled with Vivian and Heath.โ
Vivian froze while my brow knit with confusion.
Who are Magda and Heath? What stunt?
โItโs a fucking painting, not a wild animal.โ Christian sounded bored. โAs for Vivian, itโs been months, and it worked out fine. Let it go. If youโre still pissed, you shouldnโt have invited me to dinner.โ
โBe glad thingsย worked out fineย with Vivian,โ Dante said
coldly. โIfโโ
He stopped when Vivian coughed, her face inexplicably red.
A second later, the door flung open, revealing a surprised Dante and an impassive Christian.
โI see youโve finished the tour early.โ Danteโs dry tone cut through the ensuing silence. A faint blush colored his cheekbones as he flicked his gaze at a silent Vivian.
โSorry.โ My own cheeks warmed at being caught eavesdropping. โWe were on our way to the dining room and heardโฆโ I trailed off, not wanting to confirm weโd been listening in on his conversation even though that was clearly what weโd been doing.
โWe were just wrapping up,โ Christian said smoothly. There was no hint of the ire Iโd heard earlier. โDante, Vivian, itโs been lovely.โ
I said my goodbyes as well, and we rode the elevator down to the lobby in silence. But when we reached the sidewalk, I couldnโt hold back anymore.
โWhatโsย Magda?โ
Now that weโd left the Russos, I didnโt bother pretending I hadnโt heard them.
Christian had said it was a painting, but I didnโt understand why Dante was holding it for him. Christian didnโt evenย likeย art.
โNothing you need to worry about.โ His curt reply was chillier than the crisp evening air swirling around us.
The warm, easygoing Christian from dinner was gone, replaced by his aloof twin once more.
I tried again. โWhat stunt did you pull with Vivian and Heath?โย Also, who the hell is Heath?
Normally, I wasnโt this nosy, but tonight was my best shot at getting Christian to open up. Heโd revealed a sliver of what he was like behind his perfect mask earlier; I just needed to dig deeper.
โAlso nothing you need to worry about.โ โThatโs not an answer.โ
We arrived at his building, which was only a few blocks from Danteโs place.
โYou know everything about me, and I know nothing about you,โ I added. โHow is that fair?โ
โYou know plenty about me.โ Christian nodded at the doorman, who tipped his hat in greeting. โWhere I live, where I work, how I take my coffee in the morning.โ
โEveryone can find those things out with a simple Google search. I just wantโโ
โDrop it, Stella.โ There was no guise of gentleness anymore, only the sharp slice of a blade shredding me into ribbons. โI donโt want to talk about it.โ
My jaw tensed.
โFine.โ Despite my cool reply, frustration bubbled hot and unchecked inside my veins.
I met Christian last year. Weโd lived together and pretended we were a couple for weeks, yet I didnโt know a single thing about him beyond the superficial.
Meanwhile, he knew things about me Iโd never shared with anyone else. My history with my stalker. My anxiety. My dreams of starting a fashion line. The small but
important bits of my life that Iโd kept secret from even my closest friends.
I trusted him, but he clearly didnโt feel the same way about me.
Something more bitter welled beneath the frustration.
Hurt.
Christian was nothing if not a master at making people believe in things that didnโt exist.
Itโs just for show. Itโs not real.
We didnโt speak again until we arrived at his apartment, where I bid him a stiffย good nightย and retreated to the guest room before he could respond.
I couldnโt sleep, so I lay there staring at the ceiling while the cool, dark silence peeled away my frustration to reveal the hurt underneath.
I was more attracted to Christian than Iโd been to any man in years. Not only that, I was starting toย likeย him. The way he comforted me after I found the note in my apartment, the way his smiles spilled butterflies in my stomach, and the unshakeable faith heโd shown in me during the photoshootโฆtheyโd all eroded my resistance so slowly I didnโt realize how much of myself Iโd bared until I felt the sting of his rejection.
It burned like acid on raw skin, and it was my fault. I never shouldโve let my guard down.
For all my aversion to relationships, I was a romantic in my most secret of hearts, and I was terrified that, like everything else Iโd kept hidden, Christian would unravel that part of me until it was impossible to put back together.
He was dangerous, not just to his enemies but to those close to him.
And the only way to save myself was to make sure I stayed as far away from him as possible.