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Chapter no 14 – The Dougs

Tress of the Emerald Sea

THEย CROWโ€™S SONGย WASย a much larger ship than Tressโ€™s previous one.ย Ootโ€™s Dreamย had been a two-masted vessel, similar to what you might call a brigantine. Theย Crowโ€™s Songย was instead a full four-masted vessel, built for speed but with a spacious cargo hold and multiple decks. It was the equivalent of what youโ€™d call a small galleonโ€”and it had a rather large crew for Tressโ€™s world, consisting of sixty people.

Iโ€™m not going to ask you to remember them all. Mostly becauseย Iย donโ€™t remember them all.

Therefore, for ease of both narrative and our collective sanity, Iโ€™m going to name only the more important members of theย Crowโ€™s Song. The rest, regardless of gender, Iโ€™ll call โ€œDoug.โ€

Youโ€™d be surprised how common the name is across worlds. Oh, some spell it โ€œDugโ€ or โ€œDuhg,โ€ but itโ€™s always around. Regardless of local

linguistics, parents eventually start naming their kids Doug. I once spent ten years on a planet where the only sapient life was a group of pancakelike beings that expressed themselves through flatulence. And I kid you notโ€”one was named Doug. Though admittedly it had a very distinctive smell attached when the word was โ€œspoken.โ€

โ€œDougโ€ is the naming equivalent to convergent evolution. And once it arrives, it stays. A linguistic Great Filter; a wakeup call. Once a society reaches peak Doug, itโ€™s time for it to go sit in the corner and think about what it has done.

Anyway, there was at least one woman actually named Doug on the

Crowโ€™s Song, but I canโ€™t remember which one she wasโ€”so for the purposes of this story, theyโ€™re all Dougs.

Tress approached one and askedโ€”hesitantlyโ€”where the toilet was. The Doug pointed her toward the stairs down, explaining that the โ€œmiddle deck headโ€ was for low-ranking crew.

With Huck on her shoulder, she began to explore. The ship had four levels. The Dougs called the top oneโ€”which was exposed to the skyโ€”the โ€œupper deck.โ€ The โ€œmiddle deckโ€ contained places like the mess and the

armory, and small rooms for officers. The โ€œlower deckโ€ was a cramped place where most of the sailors made their bunks.

Beneath that was the hold, a cavernous space for the copious loot the pirates would surely acquire once they figured out how to stop sinking it all to the bottom of the ocean.

There were several toilet rooms, with working plumbing, thank the moons. She peeked into an unoccupied one and saw a toilet, but no bath. How did the crew bathe? She desperately wished she could, as she kept finding dead spores in the folds of her clothing. It made her skin writhe to think how much of it must have gotten on her.

She did her business in the cramped chamber with only a tiny porthole in the wall for light. Huck politely waited outside without being prompted, proving quite gentlemanly for a rat. Feeling a little better, Tress slipped out

and let him hop back onto her shoulder. What did they do with human waste, out here on the ocean? Save it all up for composting on islands? What about on long voyages? Dumping it overboard seemed dangerous, not to mention gross. Dangergross?

On her way back to the upper deck, she heard a voice coming from a room near the head. She lingered, peeking in to see a man behind a counterโ€”the large man with dreadlocks who had hauled her onto the deck. Now, when I

say โ€œlarge,โ€ you might have imagined him as heavyset, or perhaps beefy. He was both, yes, but neither word did justice to Fort, the shipโ€™s quartermaster.

Fort wasnโ€™t large like, โ€œHey, eat a saladโ€ or even large like, โ€œHey, do you play sports?โ€ He was large like, โ€œHey, how did you get through the door?โ€ It

wasnโ€™t that he was fat, though he did carry a few extra pounds. More, he looked like a person built using a different scale from the rest of humanity. One could imagine that the Shards, after creating him, had said, โ€œMaybe we went a little far in places,โ€ and decided to cut ten percent off all other humans to conserve resources.

Fort was holding up a ceramic cannonball that was small in his hands. His fingers on both hands were gnarled, either from some old injury or a

congenital disease. The condition had to affect his dexterity.

He was with a gangly woman in a vest and trousers, her hair cut very

short. Ann (the shipโ€™s carpenter) had a nose like a dart and carried not one, not two, butย threeย pistols strapped to various places on her person.

Fort handed Ann the cannonball, and although it looked light in his grip, the way she hefted it indicated otherwise. Then he picked up what appeared to be a wooden sign with a black front. Maybe two feet across and somewhat less tall.

โ€œYou examined each one in the armory?โ€ Ann asked.

Fort glanced at the back of his wooden board and nodded.

โ€œYou didnโ€™t find any others that were defective?โ€ Ann asked.

Fort tapped the back of the wooden sign, and words appeared on the front.

Not a single one,ย the sign said.ย Each one I inspected has a proper fuse, timed to explode before it sinks a ship, so it can be captured and looted.

Ann thumped the ball onto the counter. โ€œWell, if none of the others are defective, we shouldnโ€™t have to worry about sinking someone else by

accident.โ€

Fort again tapped something on the rear of the board using his index knuckle. As he did, the words changed.

I donโ€™t like this, Ann. We were supposed to launch cannonballs that only incapacitated the ship, not sank it. I hate that we ended up killing those people, and I really donโ€™t like how the captain acted afterward. It doesnโ€™t make sense.

โ€œWhat are you saying?โ€ Ann asked.

Iโ€™m saying I donโ€™t like this at all. Itโ€™s not the kind of piracy we signed up for.

โ€œI donโ€™t like it either,โ€ Ann said. โ€œBut itโ€™s too late to change our minds.

This is better than getting conscripted, at least.โ€

Is it though? Is it really? I didnโ€™t want those peopleโ€™s deaths on my shoulders, Ann.

Ann didnโ€™t respond. Finally, she stood up straight and walked toward the door. Tress felt a moment of panic, not wanting to be discovered

eavesdropping, and scurried back into the head.

Tress listened to Ann leave up the steps outside. โ€œWhat do you make of that, Huck?โ€ she whispered.

โ€œDonโ€™t know,โ€ he said. โ€œSounds like they didnโ€™t intend to sink theย Ootโ€™s Dream, which makes sense. But after the first cannonball broke through the

hull and started the ship going down, the pirates must have decided to finish the job.โ€

Tress nodded, although she didnโ€™t know what to think about all of this.

โ€œTheyโ€™re still culpable though,โ€ Huck added. โ€œWhat did they think would happen, turning pirate and attacking? They canโ€™t simply decide to be sad for killing someoneย afterย trying to rob them. These pirates are outlaws now, Tress.โ€

โ€œDoesnโ€™t sound fair,โ€ she said. โ€œThe king would hang the quartermaster even if he didnโ€™t fire the cannon?โ€

โ€œThe law is clear. Felony murder rule, to be precise. Commit a crime and someone dies? Thatโ€™s murder. Even if you werenโ€™t intending it. The royal navy will be hunting this lotโ€”and weโ€™d best not be on board when they get caught. Just in case the officials donโ€™t believe youโ€™re a captive.โ€

It was a wise suggestion. This ship was a death trapโ€”either the captain would eventually tire of her, or sheโ€™d end up dead in the inevitable fighting. She had a job to do in saving Charlie, and couldnโ€™t waste time.

But how to escape? She couldnโ€™t exactly jump overboard. Plus, her dry throat warned her that she had other more immediate concerns. If the captain wouldnโ€™t let her eat, she wouldnโ€™t live long enough to escape.

She snuck over to the quartermasterโ€™s room again and glanced in to see that the large man had turned his back toward the door. He was arranging things in his many trunks and boxes behind the counter. Could she steal

something to eat? Or perhaps Huck could do it for her? She glanced at him. โ€œWhat?โ€ he asked loudly.

Tress glared at him, making a shushing motion.

โ€œI think heโ€™s deaf,โ€ Huck said. โ€œWhen I was prowling earlier, I heard someone mention that the quartermaster couldnโ€™t hear.โ€

Indeed, Fort continued his work, still facing away from them. He didnโ€™t notice them talking.

โ€œI met a deaf human once,โ€ Huck said. โ€œShe was a dancer, and one of the best under the moonsโ€”best Iโ€™d seen, anyway. I was enjoying the time with her, but it ended up getting interrupted in a rather abrupt way. Which is a

shame, but things happen. I also couldnโ€™t afford to talk to her, sinceโ€”you know, things relating to who and what I am. Didnโ€™t want to reveal myself.โ€

โ€œMaybe,โ€ Tress suggested, โ€œthis would be another good time to not talk. Unless you want one of the pirates to realize they have a potentially sellable loquacious rat on board.โ€

โ€œYeah, good point,โ€ he said. โ€œItโ€™s just, I spent all those weeks hiding on the smuggler ship before they grabbed me. Got kind of lonely. Itโ€™s good to have someone to chat withโ€ฆโ€

She glanced at him.

โ€œโ€ฆwhich Iโ€™ll stop doing now.โ€

Tress moved to leaveโ€”but as she did so, one of the boards creaked underfoot. Fort spun immediately in her direction, then narrowed his eyes as he saw her. He might not have been able to hear, but every quartermaster Iโ€™ve ever known has a kind of sixth sense for when people are sneaking

around near their goods.

Beneath the enormous manโ€™s glare, Tress felt like bolting. But heย hadย been the one whoโ€™d pulled her up onto the deck. She stood in place instead, until he raised his strange board from the counter.

Come here, girl,ย it read.

It wouldnโ€™t do any good to run. So, feeling like she was entering the dragonโ€™s den, Tress entered the room.

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