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Chapter no 16

These Hollow Vows (These Hollow Vows, 1)

โ€œWHO TAUGHT YOU TO HOLDย a sword like that?โ€ Jalek asks with a sneer.

โ€œNo one.โ€ No matter how many times I adjust my grip on the bamboo training stick, I canโ€™t mirror the way the Seelie rebel grasps his sword.

After three days of waiting around the Golden Palace for Mordeusโ€™s goblin, Pretha insisted that I leave with her today. The goblin, she promised, would find me when he wanted to and not a moment sooner.

When I arrived at Finnโ€™s house this morning, I was given a change of

clothesโ€”pantsย for once, thank the godsโ€”brought to a training room in the basement, and told that I was going to learn how to physically defend myself. โ€œI have never held a sword before today.โ€

Jalekโ€™s face is grim as he surveys me. โ€œWe should have started with her physical training on her first day here,โ€ he says, speaking to Pretha without taking his eyes off me. โ€œLook at those arms. Theyโ€™re little more than twigs. She couldnโ€™t defend herself against a sprite.โ€

โ€œI canย hear you,โ€ I snap.

โ€œIf she masters her power, she wonโ€™t need swords,โ€ Pretha says, folding her arms across her chest.

โ€œI have no intention of getting into a sword fight anyway,โ€ I mutter.

Jalek studies my stance. โ€œShoulders back, chin up. Feet shoulder-width apart.โ€ He taps my training stick with his sword, and I wobble to the side. โ€œKeep your knees soft.โ€

โ€œPretha!โ€

We all spin toward the sound of her gasped name to see Finn and Tynan on the stairs. Finnโ€™s face is pale and contorted with pain. Heโ€™s slouched

sideways as Tynan holds him up with one arm.

Jalek drops his sword, and he and Pretha rush toward their prince, helping Tynan get him to a chair in the corner of the room.

โ€œI found him collapsed at the top of the stairs,โ€ Tynan says.

Finn is grasping his side, and his lids flutter like heโ€™s struggling to hold on to consciousness.

โ€œWhat happened?โ€ Pretha asks, kneeling before him.

โ€œI let my guard down,โ€ Finn whispers.

โ€œNo shit,โ€ Jalek barks. โ€œWhat the hell were you doing out there? You have something that needs taking care of, you send one of us. You sure as fuck donโ€™t go alone.โ€

โ€œI was with Kane.โ€ Finnโ€™s pants are bloody, but itโ€™s not until he leans back that I see the bright red blood coating his fingers.

โ€œKane?โ€ Jalek barks. โ€œGreat. Our entire realm in the hands ofย two

Unseelie idiots.โ€

โ€œWe got a lead,โ€ Finn says through clenched teeth, โ€œand none of you were available. Iโ€™m not going to sit on my ass until old age kills me.โ€

โ€œWhat kind of creature did this to you?โ€ Jalek asks. โ€œIs there any chance the wound is poisoned?โ€

Finn shakes his head. โ€œSwordโ€”โ€ he coughs out. โ€œKane and I were

smuggling a group out of the queenโ€™s northern camp. The sentinels posted around the perimeter were dressed like her royal guard, and we assumed

they were Seelie. Sheโ€™s never deigned to dress Wild Fae in her sacred colors before, but it appears the old hag has wised up.โ€

โ€œOne of ours did this?โ€ Tynan asks, glancing toward Pretha. Pretha sneers. โ€œDirty traitors.โ€

Tynan draws in a ragged breath. โ€œWhere is Kane?โ€

โ€œKane made it out with the group while I brought down the guards,โ€ Finn says. โ€œDara and Luna are with him. They should be back in a few hours,

after he gets the refugees through the portal.โ€

โ€œSo the bastard who did this is dead?โ€ Jalek asks, those dark green eyes blazing.

โ€œBy my own sword,โ€ Finn says.

Camps? Refugees? Traitor Wild Fae? โ€œWhy are Wild Fae more dangerous than Seelie guards?โ€ I ask, understanding nothing.

They all ignore me. Pretha shoves Finnโ€™s hands aside to study the wound.

Her expression is a study in tenderness and gut-deep worry.

I step forward to get a closer look at the wound. Itโ€™s deep, but yesterday I watched Riaan slice his arm open when he was training with Sebastian. It healed so quickly I could practically see the flesh knitting itself back together, but thereโ€™s no sign of that with Finnโ€™s wound. โ€œWhy arenโ€™t you healing?โ€

Finn ignores my question and lifts his chin in Jalekโ€™s direction. โ€œI have a med kit in the safe. Grab it for me.โ€ His voice is rough with pain.

โ€œFinn?โ€ I wait for him to acknowledge meโ€”my questionโ€”but he just closes his eyes and leans back.

Pretha chokes back a sob as she hovers a hand over the wound.

โ€œDonโ€™t waste your energy, Pretha,โ€ Finn says softly. He gently touches her face, and something uncomfortable twists in my chest. I scowl. I

shouldnโ€™t care about their relationship beyond how it affects my training

and my bargain with the king. โ€œThis isnโ€™t a deathblow,โ€ he whispers. โ€œIย will

heal.โ€

Pretha swallows and nods. I can practically see her pulling herself together. โ€œYouโ€™re losing too much blood.โ€

Jalek pulls a small table next to Finnโ€™s chair and puts the med kit on top of it. โ€œWe need to enlist a human healer to teach us how to use this mortal shit,โ€ he mutters, his eyes fixed on the ointments and salves.

Finn lifts his head and meets my gaze. โ€œDo you have any experience stitching up wounds, Princess?โ€

โ€œSome.โ€ Iโ€™ve stitched myself up a few times, but never anything this big. โ€œBut it will hurt, and my stitches are more likely to leave an ugly scar than a neat one.โ€

Finn grunts. โ€œYou hear that, Tynan.โ€ His words are breathy, and he

winces as if it hurts to talk. โ€œMaybe mine will be uglier than Kaneโ€™s, and heโ€™ll stop his gloating.โ€

โ€œI will never understand you males,โ€ Pretha mutters, pushing to her feet before turning to me. โ€œWhat do you need, Abriella?โ€

I sort through the pile of ointments and find a disinfecting salve, a healing salve, and a numbing salve. Unfortunately, with a wound like this, none of them can be applied until after I stitch him up.

โ€œCan you do something for his pain?โ€ I ask her. โ€œAfter the Barghest

attacked, Sebastian numbed my leg until the healer could get to me. Could you do something like that?โ€

Pretha purses her lips and shakes her head. โ€œI could try, but it wouldnโ€™t help.โ€

โ€œFinnโ€™s tough,โ€ Jalek says, showing his first hint of a smile since he spotted Finn on the stairs. โ€œHe doesnโ€™t need anything.โ€

โ€œIโ€™ll get you a drink,โ€ Tynan says, and a decanter of amber liquid and a tumbler appear on the small table. He fills it with shaking hands and passes it to Finn, who doesnโ€™t hesitate before draining the whole glass in two gulps.

โ€œDo it, Princess.โ€

I gather the thread and needle from the kit, but when I look down at my hands, I see theyโ€™re shaking as badly as Tynanโ€™s. โ€œCan you spare a bit of that for me?โ€ I ask him. โ€œJust to calm the nerves.โ€

โ€œHappily.โ€ Tynan summons another glass. He pours half the amount he poured for Finn and hands it to me.

I take one large swallow and cough as the burning liquor hits my throat. โ€œThatโ€™s enough for me,โ€ I mutter. I nod to Finn. โ€œWe need to wash the

area.โ€

Finn gingerly sits up, and Pretha returns to his side to help with the buttons and peel the shirt off him. His dark, muscular chest is covered with a smattering of rune tattoos. My mouth goes dry at the sight, and I turn

away. Bad enough to gawk at him while heโ€™s injured, but worse to do it in front of his . . . What is Pretha? His wife? His mate? Just a friend?

Am I jealous? Not of her for having him, but of the connection they have, of the trust and honesty between them that I canโ€™t have with Sebastian even if I could trust him again. Thanks to my bargain with Mordeus, I can never have that.

Nevertheless, I turn away, using the time while Pretha cleans the area to prepare the needle and thread for stitching. My mother taught me to sew, but I never took to it the way Jas did. It was only through Jasโ€™s persistence that I learned how to make strong, clean stitch lines.

When Prethaโ€™s done prepping the area, I take her place and kneel at Finnโ€™s side. Now that heโ€™s cleaned up, the wound doesnโ€™t look as gruesome as before, but it is deep, and I hesitate before plunging the needle into his

skin.

โ€œDo it,โ€ Finn says. He flinches at the first slide of the needle, but he doesnโ€™t move.

My stomach churns at the sight of the oozing blood, but I blow out a long breath and keep stitching.ย I can do this.ย โ€œWill someone tell me about these camps of the queenโ€™s?โ€ I ask without looking away from my task.

I can sense them looking at one another as I stitch, sense that theyโ€™re having a silent conversation and deciding what to tell me.

โ€œDonโ€™t let the wordย campย confuse you,โ€ Jalek says. โ€œTheyโ€™re prisons.โ€ โ€œFor criminals?โ€ I ask.

Jalek shakes his head. โ€œTheir only crime is being caught on Seelie land with Unseelie blood.โ€

โ€œWhat do you mean by prison?โ€ I never bought into the idea that the Seelie were โ€œgood,โ€ since I never trusted any of the fae, but I have trouble believing that they would be cruel to their own kind without a good reason, even if the faeries in question were from a rival court.

โ€œThe adults are put into labor camps, forced to work eighteen hours a day with minimal provisions,โ€ Jalek says, his face so somber I canโ€™t help but believe him. โ€œTheyโ€™re executed if they donโ€™t fall in line.โ€

Does Sebastian know about this?

โ€œYour prince has tried to get his mother to end the campsโ€”at least as they are now,โ€ Finn says, grimacing through the pain and reading me like always. โ€œBut she refuses.โ€

I release a breath, and relief courses through me. Sebastian might not be the male I once believed he was, but I could not stomach a world in which the kind and caring mageโ€™s apprentice I once longed for was responsible for such atrocities.

โ€œTriedย my ass,โ€ Jalek mumbles. โ€œIf he really wanted to see the end of the cruelty, heโ€™d assassinate the queen himself, but he doesnโ€™t have the backbone. I thought heโ€™d snap when he found out about the children, butโ€”โ€

โ€œWhat about the children?โ€ I ask.

Pretha meets Finnโ€™s eyes for a beat, as if getting his permission before

she explains. โ€œThey separate the children from their parents. They say itโ€™s to discourage families from crossing into Seelie lands, but they brainwash them, feeding them propaganda about the queen and teaching them that they are, by their very birth, beneath the Seelie and therefore meant to

serve.โ€

I still my hands. I have to close my eyes for a beat at the thought of those children. I know what itโ€™s like to be without your parents and forced to

serve those who feed and shelter you. How naรฏve was I to think that all the fae led easy lives?

This time when my stomach heaves, it has nothing to do with the sight of blood.

โ€œWell, look at that,โ€ Pretha whispers.

โ€œPrincess,โ€ Finn says, and I open my eyes to see that Iโ€™ve blanketed the two of us in darkness. The only light between us comes from those

captivating silver eyes. โ€œWe find the children and get them to safety in the Wild Fae territory. Kane is transporting two dozen as we speak.โ€

I hold his gaze as I coil my power back into myself. It hisses through my blood like a wild animal flailing inside a cage. โ€œWhy do any Unseelie come here if itโ€™s so bad?โ€

โ€œBecause their existence under Mordeusโ€™s rule is so grim that the risk is worth it,โ€ Pretha says. โ€œHeโ€™s greedy and selfish, and he doesnโ€™t care about taking care of his whole kingdom. His laws favor the rich and powerful and punish the less fortunate.โ€

I let my gaze flick up to Finnโ€™s for a beat, and I canโ€™t help but think that the anguish I see on his face has less to do with the wound in his side or the needle in his skin, and more to do with the state of his kingdom.

โ€œMany choose to flee rather than to stay in such conditions,โ€ Jalek says, continuing for Pretha. โ€œBut the Unseelie land is surrounded by vast and treacherous seas on every side except the one that borders the Seelie lands. Like Finn said, the Wild Fae will take in refugees, but the Unseelie have to get thereโ€”either by trekking through the whole of the Seelie territory or by finding a portal.โ€

I continue stitching, but I have to focus to keep the rage inside me from filling the room with darkness. โ€œWhy donโ€™t they use goblins to transport them?โ€

Jalek grunts, clearly disgusted. โ€œThose creatures are more selfish than Mordeus. Thereโ€™s nothing the refugees can offer thatโ€™s worth getting on the bad side of both Mordeus and Arya.โ€

โ€œAnyway,โ€ Pretha says, โ€œa goblin can transport only two at a time at best. The easiest path to Wild Fae territory for groups of any significant size is a portal.โ€

Tynanโ€™s been so quiet, Iโ€™m almost surprised when he speaks. โ€œThe Wild Fae king and queen have been doing their best to welcome the displaced Unseelieโ€”temporarily only, just until Finn can take his rightful place on the throne. But for their own border security, they canโ€™t allow portals

directly from Mordeusโ€™s land to theirs. The usurper would use it against them and send his nastiest creatures through to torture Wild Fae innocents.โ€ The webbing on his forehead glows brighter and pulses until he rolls his neck and draws in a deep breath. โ€œWeโ€™ve been setting up portals near the Seelie border and trying to get the Unseelie through before the queenโ€™s guard catches them.โ€

โ€œThe portals have to be opened, closed, and moved frequently to dodge Aryaโ€™s guard,โ€ Pretha says, pouring herself a drink. โ€œItโ€™s draining on our forces, but itโ€™s the best solution weโ€™ve come up with for the time being.โ€

I finish the final stitches, and when I lift my gaze to Finnโ€™s again, heโ€™s watching me. I donโ€™t bother trying to hide my devastation from him. I quietly apply the necessary salves across the stitches, but my mind is reeling.ย The children.

โ€œIs he going to die?โ€ The tiny, tear-stained question comes from the

stairs. I wonder how long the childโ€™s been standing there and whether she saw the extent of Finnโ€™s wound. I instinctively stand and step toward her.

I donโ€™t get far before Tynan scoops her into his arms. โ€œNah, kiddo. Heโ€™s going to be just fine. See?โ€ He carries her to Finn, who reaches up and tickles her bare foot. She giggles and wipes away her tears.

If she were human, Iโ€™d guess her to be five or six years old. She has light brown skin and silky dark hair like Prethaโ€™s. On her forehead, she has the beginnings of the silver webbing that Pretha and Tynan both have, but her big eyes are silver, and her smileโ€”itโ€™s just like Finnโ€™s.

โ€œLark, I told you to stay upstairs when we have guests,โ€ Pretha says, glancing at me. Her meaning is clear. We might be helping each other, but Iโ€™m not to be trusted with knowledge of her child. Never mind that I just stitched up herโ€”whatever Finn is to her.

โ€œBut I saw her in a fire,โ€ Lark says, and points to me. She cocks her head, as if trying to put together a puzzle. โ€œYour sister isnโ€™t in there.โ€

โ€œLark, stop!โ€ Pretha pulls the child from Tynanโ€™s arms and buries her face in her hair. โ€œWhat did Mommy say about using your sight?โ€

โ€œPretha,โ€ Jalek says, his voice gentle, โ€œwe might need to know about this fire ifโ€”โ€

โ€œThen find a seer,โ€ she snaps. There are tears in her eyes. โ€œNot my daughter.โ€

โ€œIโ€™m sorry, Mommy.โ€ Lark puts her little hands on her motherโ€™s cheeks. โ€œI donโ€™t try. I justย see.ย And I donโ€™t want her to die in the fire. She did that already.โ€

My heart squeezes hard at the worry in this sweet childโ€™s voice. โ€œI didnโ€™t.โ€ I hold out my arms. โ€œSee? I was in a fire a long time ago, but I survived.โ€

Lark isnโ€™t paying attention to me. She looks at her mom when she says, โ€œNext time she dies, it has to be during a bonding ceremony. Otherwise,

sheโ€™ll never be queen.โ€

My blood chills.ย Next time she dies . . . โ€œQueen?โ€ย Jalek barks.

โ€œPlease stop, baby.โ€ Tears stream down Prethaโ€™s cheeks. Sheโ€™s beyond distressed.

Jalek spins on me. โ€œYouย doย love the golden prince.โ€ He mutters a curse. โ€œYou mustย tell usย before you promise him anything.โ€

I ignore Jalek and pretend I donโ€™t notice Finnโ€™s piercing silver gaze on me. โ€œI didnโ€™t die,โ€ I tell Lark. โ€œAnd Iโ€™m not going to be the Seelie queen.โ€

She giggles. โ€œYou could never be the Seelie queen.โ€

This should be a relief. And yet the words are a little splinter in the

wistful part of my heart that I keep hidden from the worldโ€”from myself. The part that wants Sebastian, the part that wants to be good enough to be

. . .

No. Iย donโ€™tย want that.

Jalek gives Finn a hard look before turning back to study the childโ€™s face. โ€œYou mean theย Unseelie queen,ย Lark?โ€

Pretha shoots him a glare so angry, everyone in the room withers under it, but Lark smiles. โ€œShe could if she wanted, but she wonโ€™t have a chance if

she dies in the fire.โ€

โ€œTynan,โ€ Pretha says, passing her daughter into his arms. โ€œTake Lark to her room, please.โ€

Tynan nods, and Lark wraps her arms around his neck. โ€œYou promised youโ€™d teach me how to play your card game. Can we do that now?โ€ Tynan asks as he starts up the stairs.

โ€œOkay, but Iโ€™m really good,โ€ she says. โ€œYou canโ€™t get mad if I win.โ€ โ€œI promise to be a good sport,โ€ he says, and their voices fade away. โ€œWell, that was . . . enlightening,โ€ Jalek says.

Pretha glares at him.

โ€œLark canโ€™t help it,โ€ Finn says softly. โ€œHer magic isnโ€™t like yours, Pretha.

Thereโ€™s no on and off. It justย comes.โ€

โ€œAre we going to talk about what she saw?โ€ Jalek asks.

โ€œRight, the fiery death.โ€ Finn looks at me, and his brows disappear into his mop of curls. โ€œThoughts, Princess?โ€

โ€œI think sheโ€™s just a kid and it doesnโ€™t mean anything.โ€ I hold my arms out to my sides. โ€œSee? Iโ€™m not dead. Humans donโ€™t get to keep walking around after we die.โ€

Jalek grunts. I have no idea what that means.

Pretha wipes away her tears and drags in a breath, composing herself before she turns to Finn. โ€œAsk your spies in the Unseelie Court if they know anything about an attack on the Golden Palace. Maybe something with fire or explosives.โ€ She turns to me and forces a smile. โ€œAnd you? Stop, drop,

and roll, okay?โ€

I barely refrain from rolling my eyes. โ€œCan we go back to the situation with the camps and the refugees?โ€ Finn looks more ragged and tired than

Iโ€™ve ever seen him, but I need to know. โ€œThis would stop if you were on the Throne of Shadows?โ€ I ask him.

โ€œI canโ€™t change Seelie law,โ€ Finn says, โ€œbut I could make life better in my court. I would do everything in my power to make it so my people didnโ€™t need to run. Everything I do I do to protect my people and give them a safe home.โ€ His eyes lock on mine, so intense youโ€™d think I alone had the power to give him his fatherโ€™s throne. โ€œThat is a kingโ€™s true responsibility.โ€

I need Jas back, and that has to remain my first priority, but I canโ€™t stop thinking of those Unseelie children, stuck in veritable prisons and being told theyโ€™re less worthy because of their birth. If Finn overthrows Mordeus, the bargain would be moot. Finn would give my sister back. I know he

would. โ€œTell me how I can help.โ€

Finnโ€™s face goes cold, and he turns to Jalek. โ€œHelp me to my room?โ€ โ€œThe girl wants toย help,โ€ Jalek says.

Finn pushes out of the chair and flinches in pain as he straightens. โ€œOr Iโ€™ll get there by myself.โ€

โ€œFine.โ€ Jalek studies me for a long beat before helping his prince up the stairs.

โ€œDid I say something wrong?โ€ I ask Pretha.

She shakes her head. โ€œI think that was enough excitement for the day.

Letโ€™s head back to the castle early.โ€

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