† Sage †
I woke in a cocoon of blankets that still smelled of charred wood and a hint of caramel. All the notes of a good glass of scotch wrapped around me like a comforting embrace. It wasn’t aftershave or cologne either.
Nope. This was one hundred percent sexy wolf-man Maddock’s scent.
Groaning, I bit my lip and buried my face into the pillow.
Last night had not gone at all like I’d planned, but when I realized I was actually feeling the wolf’s emotions, my whole world tipped off its
axis. Then the man ate with such hunger and appreciation for my food that I was drooling.
The toxic radiation mixed with Maddock’s scent and the taste of his homemade whiskey did me in. Or maybe I finally snapped from the
pressure of it all and had descended into batshit crazy territory.
But I decided we should stay.
It wasn’t my fault that it smelled so good in here.
A noise outside brought me back to my senses and I jumped out of bed, pulling my checkered pajama pants on as I raced to the window.
The first rays of the morning sun were breaking over the mountains and little bugs danced around the brook in the misty haze that lingered throughout the valley. It was breathtaking in a way I’d never seen, but that wasn’t what made me gasp.
Maddock was already in the yard. Muscles stretched the back of his thin t-shirt as he unloaded giant logs from the truck and carried them over to a pile. He’d left late last night saying he was going to his brother’s house.
By the sweat glistening on his skin, it seemed like he’d been at this for a while.
Did the man even sleep?
I shoved my feet into slippers and hurried across the cabin quietly so I didn’t wake the girls who were holed up in Coral’s temporary room.
The brisk morning air sent goosebumps along my skin. I hugged myself as I stepped into the yard.
“Good morning.” Maddock turned to smile with the giant post resting across his shoulders. His gaze drifted down to my state of half dress and the man sniffed. He seemed to like whatever he smelled. “How did you sleep?”
“Better than I ever have.” I shivered, still trying to shake the sleep from my brain. “It’s really early though. Did you get any sleep?”
His smile fell and he looked guilty all of a sudden. I had the random urge to see if I could tune into his wolf’s emotions from across the yard or if I needed to touch his skin like I’d done last night.
“I’m sorry if I woke you up. I’ll leave the rest of this for later if you want to go back to bed.”
“No please don’t. I’m fine. I was already awake,” I hurried to explain. “Let me get some warmer clothes on and I’ll help you with…”
My voice trailed off as I looked to the giant log. Maybe they’re hollow? I’d figure something out.
“No work this morning.” He winked at me and I couldn’t help but smile. “I wanted to drop these off and see what you were making for breakfast before I take you to my mother’s house. Or if you have scraps left from last night, I’ll take those too. It’s been years since I had a stew as good as yours was.”
*
When everyone was full and dressed, Maddock stood in the yard eyeing my car. I had the same wary expression, not sure if he would fit in the passenger seat even though everything was unloaded.
“Maybe we should follow you,” I offered.
He scratched the beard on his chin as he gave me a sideways grin. “I’m not sure that box of yours is high enough off the ground to make it on the back roads to Lisa’s cabin.”
I crossed my arms over my chest and moved to stand defensively in front of my vehicle. It may not have been the newest model in Ethica, but I’d earned and paid for my very reliable car when I was Coral’s age.
“If that’s the case, then I won’t be able to make the weekly trips out there. Maybe we should rethink this plan.”
“I’ll leave you the keys to the truck on Sundays.” Maddock moved to open the passenger door of his vehicle.
It was a little odd and a lot of frustrating that he always had a plan to make a complete stranger’s life less complicated.
I hesitated, looking to my car and bit back a smile as I pictured his large frame hunched over my steering wheel. “What will you drive then?”
“Shifters don’t need to drive,” Kera said as she pulled Coral up into the back of the truck bed. “We could turn into wolves and give you a ride that way if you prefer.”
“Can we do that?” Coral’s eyes brightened as she got ready for another adventure.
The color drained from my face.
As much as I wanted to explore this whole new I-can-feel-a-wolf’s- emotions-thing, riding on the back of the beast through the forest felt like it might be an intense way to start.
“It’s probably better if I learn the roads.” I hurried to the open passenger door and slipped past Maddock without touching his skin.
He grinned as he closed the door and shook his head as he walked around to the driver’s side. For someone who hadn’t gotten much sleep, he was sure in a good mood today. Yesterday he’d been all growls and deep thought. This morning he was full of open smiles that made him look younger and even more handsome.
Not that I was looking though.
I’d firmly decided that this was going to be a friend-zone situation if our living arrangements were going to work.
The air in the cab grew thick as he climbed behind the steering wheel and rested one arm on the back of the seat with his fingers inches from my neck. He drove with one hand, relaxed as he maneuvered the giant vehicle with ease.
I took one last appreciative look and then figured out there was no power button for the window. Reminding myself of the friend-zone situation, I cranked down the glass to let in some fresh air and glanced up at the rearview mirror to check on the girls.
My sister and Kera were huddled in the back and talking but their voices were lost to the wind.
“Are they going to be okay back there?”
Maddock’s eyes traveled slowly to me as if he didn’t have a care in
the world. “It’d take a lot more than a jump from a moving vehicle to hurt a
shifter, but I promise we aren’t going anywhere fast.”
“Okay.” I didn’t point out that until a few days ago my sister was
indistinguishable from a human and she hadn’t turned into a wolf yet so I wasn’t sure she had all the capabilities that came with this shifter business. There were still a lot of things we had to learn about this world. Speaking of which…
“Can we talk about Kera for a second? It’s been amazing for Coral to have her with us and I don’t mind her sticking around, but isn’t her father worried about her spending all this time away from home? Or is this another cultural difference between us?”
A dark look passed over Maddock’s face as he furrowed his brow. For the first time this morning, I felt the wolf stir. It intrigued me enough to want to lean closer and reach out to touch his skin, so I kept myself firmly pressed against the door.
Friend zone baby.
“Apollo is the Alpha of the pack and his responsibilities are heavy,” he said this to explain to me, but it seemed like he was trying to convince himself. “But to answer your question, he isn’t the best father. It’s not normal for families to ignore their pups. And since there aren’t many
shifters that are Kera’s age around here anymore, I’m happy she found a friend to confide in.”
My suspicions were confirmed, but I didn’t want to continue to press on what was clearly a sore spot. I tried to change the conversation to something lighter. “How does the Alpha thing work around here? Is there some kind of election to vote him in?”
Ethica had yearly elections for the council members, but I’d always suspected they were rigged.
“It’s a birthright,” Maddock said as he turned down a bumpy dirt road. “Cerberus pack’s Alpha and their mate have had triplet births for
hundreds of generations. Each boy has a different wolf hierarchy, an Alpha, a Beta, and a Sigma. The two others help the Alpha to run the pack when
the previous Alpha retires or passes away.”
“Like a monarchy?” I scoffed. “What if the people don’t want the Alpha triplet as their leader?”
“They’re welcome to challenge for the position.” He shrugged. “But so far, none who’ve tried it have survived.”
The brutality of the statement opened my eyes and I clenched my
hands at my sides, willing my heart to slow down. Maybe mutants…er… shifters were as blood thirsty as the stories said.
Note to self:
Don’t challenge the Alpha.
Even if he wasn’t a great father.
Still, I had to ask, “Kera mentioned something about Lennox not being supportive of the Alpha. Does that mean he’s going to challenge him?”
“Why the sudden interest in pack politics?” Maddock asked the question playfully, but the ghost of the wolf’s emotions seemed a little stronger now.
Frustration? Jealousy?
It was gone before I could understand.
“I figured I should learn more about the community we’re going to be a part of.” I feigned his casual shrug.
Maddock’s smile returned and the wolf seemed… happy. “No.
Lennox is a beta wolf and not strong enough to take on a wolf with alpha tendencies. But even if he wasn’t, he doesn’t care enough to challenge for Alpha of a dying pack.”
“You’ve said that before. That the pack is dying. Is there some kind of illness we should be worried about?” I turned to look at Coral through the back window. Her blond hair was flying in the wind, obscuring her face from view.
“The only sickness we have is boredom.” He chuckled, following my line of sight. “It’s worse for the younger ones. We’ve been isolated from the other packs for so long that most of the youth leave to find their mates and not many of them return. Sometimes we’ll get a stray or two, but the old
timers here are set in their ways. They follow Apollo because of tradition and the ones that question if he is failing the pack won’t do anything more than talk.”
Interesting. “I don’t understand why you are cut off from the others now. Kera said you used to work together and there were celebrations in town.”
His hand gripped the steering wheel tighter. “There was a situation with Apollo about seventeen years ago that earned a sort of banishment.
The other Alpha’s from the surrounding packs didn’t agree with the way things were handled.”
“Then it is Apollo’s fault that the pack is dying. He did fail them.” I didn’t mean to sound rude, but I wasn’t seeing many holes in that logic from the information he was giving.
Maddock sighed and there was a vulnerability about the sound that made my heart ache for him. “Apollo is my brother and though I may not agree with how he acts, he hasn’t been dealt the easiest hand. My job is to protect him and the pack.”
We may not even be the same species, but I felt the weight of his statement settle on my shoulders. I couldn’t walk away from my
responsibilities either.
“So what happens next? He’s going to find someone to have triplet babies with and they’ll take over the pack?”
I figured we were playing the long game here.
Maddock’s gaze lifted to the rearview mirror that reflected the girls huddled in the back. “That’s no longer an option.”
Before I could ask him to elaborate, he pulled in front of a cottage covered in vines with smoke drifting lazily to the sky from a brick chimney.
He put the truck in park. “We can talk more about it later. Now let me introduce you to the infamous half-wolf, half-witch Lisa Cerberus.”
*
I was expecting a little old decrepit woman with gnarled fingers that had trouble getting around. There were a few geriatric patients my father had treated behind closed doors that were well past life extending treatment. I remember their faces looking comfortable and worn like an old sweater instead of the taut plastic surgery faces of the elderly citizens that roamed
the streets of Ethica. A fragile patient is what I’d assumed I was needed for now.
I had about five seconds of dumb confusion while standing in the yard before a robust woman with charms in her long black hair came barreling towards me and pinned me in a bone-crushing embrace.
“It’s so good to finally meet you,” Lisa said as she released her hold to look me over with eyes the color of blueish gray that she’d given to her
son.
“Um. It’s nice to meet you too.” I really hoped my confusion didn’t
sound like disappointment as I turned to Maddock, wishing he’d answer the what-the-fuck question on my face.
“And you.” Lisa pulled back abruptly when Coral jumped down from the truck. A range of emotions changed the woman’s expressions. Her angry scowl ended with tears brimming in her eyes.
I stepped in front of my sister protectively. “Is something wrong?” “No.” Lisa’s charms jingled as she shook her head and she touched
her cheeks to dry them. “She looks just like her mother. Can I hold your hand, pup?”
“You knew my mother?” Coral asked, taking a step around me. I resisted the urge to hold her back as Coral held out her arm. There was obviously a history here with Melinda that we needed to learn more about.
“I met her a few times when she was a child before she decided to
leave our pack. She was a lovely girl and sorely missed.” Lisa caressed her thumb over Coral’s palm. “It’s a shame that she passed away, but she left
the world a precious gift. You, my dear, will go onto accomplish great things.”
Coral beamed with a humble excitement as if she very much wanted to believe those words.
I was just happy Melinda’s story didn’t sound that bad and decided I liked Lisa already.
But I still had no clue what I was doing here. Maddock had his back to me as he stared at the trees.
“Why don’t you girls go inside?” Lisa embraced her granddaughter and then shooed them both toward the house. “The tea is done brewing
now, but don’t eat all the brownies.”
I was still silently willing Maddock to turn around when Lisa put her hand on my shoulder. He turned to face us and his eyes met mine, but it was his mother who broke the awkward silence.
“Go handle it. You have a job to do.”
“Are you sure?” he asked. His eyes never left mine and the intensity made my heart begin to race.
I looked away, wondering if they were aware that I’d missed half of whatever conversation took place before the words were spoken out loud.
But I didn’t want to be rude. “I’m sure we’ll be okay. If you’ve got something important to do, please don’t worry about us. We’ve taken enough time of yours as it is.”
Maddock’s face was unreadable as he crossed the distance between us and placed the truck keys in my hand. “I’ll see you at the cabin later so we can go over the blueprints.”
The touch of his skin against mine was a warm current through my veins and a low growl filled my ears.
“Your wolf is frustrated.” I laughed. “I don’t think he wants to go to work on a Sunday.”
“What’s this?” Lisa asked as she took a step back so she could look between the two of us.
“She feels my wolf.” Maddock turned to his mother. They shared a long and mirrored stare.
I was really starting to hate the pack link.
“Go.” Lisa smiled and pushed him away as she hooked her arm through my elbow. “I promise to take good care of our little witch.”
*
“About that,” I started, glancing over my shoulder to where Maddock was stripping his clothes.
Eyes forward. I turned back to our walk quickly; worried Lisa would have caught me staring.
Even if my reasons were strictly platonic. I only wanted to see what the wolf looked like without blood on his jaws.
“About what?” Lisa urged me to continue. Her face was expectant like she already knew what I was about to say.
“I don’t really know what a witch is and I don’t think I’m one. I don’t cast spells or ride on brooms.” I stopped when we approached her sprawling garden full of herbs and gorgeous ripe produce sewn directly into the earth.
Butterflies glided around the tops of green leaves as Lisa leaned down to pull a slug off a tomato plant while humming to it softly. If anyone had witchy vibes, it was definitely this woman. I was embarrassed at being lumped into a category I clearly didn’t belong in.
“My blood is pure,” I hurried to explain.
“Oh sweetheart.” Lisa stood up and brushed her hands on her pants. “What makes you think magic is something that would taint your blood or make you different? Everyone can access at least a little bit of magic.”
“I don’t access magic.” I wanted her to know the truth even if she thought less of me. “And I honestly don’t know what Maddock expected me to do here.”
Lisa laughed. The sound was light and airy like the simple chimes from the charms dangling in her hair. “My son thinks I’m lonely so you’re here to keep me company, but I think you’re exactly where you are supposed to be. Maybe it’s time that you learned more about yourself.
Magic is literally seeping from your veins and you say that you can’t access it. Why?”
“Because I can’t.” I shrugged. “I don’t even know what magic is.” “Open your eyes and look around. Magic is life. It’s everywhere.”
She spread her arms wide.
I squinted, trying to see the magic in the air like it was microscopic particles I’d somehow missed my whole life.
“I’ve got nothing.” I shook my head. “Like I said, you’ve pegged me wrong.”
“What happened to make you so closed off to your true nature?” Lisa watched me with a penetrative look that made me shift uncomfortably.
“With all the power surrounding you, the odds are that you’d go insane if you didn’t have some kind of outlet. What do you do when you are
overwhelmed? Or what brings you joy in this life?”
My list of hobbies had dwindled as Coral’s grew over the years. But one stood out. “Cooking.”
“A kitchen witch?” Lisa arched an eyebrow. “It’s been a while since I met one of those. Walk with me a while longer so I can get a read on you and tell me more about why you love to cook.”
The peaceful sounds of the forest soothed my anxiety without
conscious effort as we walked and talked about one of my favorite things. “I like when people are happy and fed. They’re much better to be
around then.”
“And what do you feed them?” Lisa chuckled.
“Everything.” I smiled. “It depends on the occasion or what foods are available.”
“Tell me about special meals.” Lisa strolled along casually, like she had all the time in the world.
I thought back to dinner parties. “I like to start with soup and my standard is a roasted butternut squash with a bit of cilantro on top.”
“Why the cilantro?” Lisa asked. “It tastes good.” I shrugged.
“You’re going to have to think harder than that.” Lisa stopped walking to look at me. The intensity of her eyes wasn’t as strong as her son’s, but it made me squirm just the same.
I looked away. “I guess the soup aids in digestion of the main course and cilantro seems to help with that.”
“It does.” Lisa continued on the path. “Cilantro also is used for love spells and for cleansing the aura.”
“Is that why people love my soup?” I tried a lame joke that only earned me half a smile.
Tough crowd.
“Tell me more about the herbs you use when you cook.”
I think I was smart enough to see where this was going. “I use herbs for more than cooking. Lavender is calming so I make infused oils that help with anxiety. I also make a great chamomile and honey ice cream to serve at the end of a hard day.”
“So you do have a working knowledge of witchcraft.” She nodded. “It’s scant and has holes that need to be filled, but it’s there. Yet you still don’t think you’ve been accessing the power of the earth to do your bidding and I agree that it doesn’t seem like enough. The power that surrounds you is stronger than common herbal magic. I still wonder what your calling is.
Tell me why you didn’t belong with the purists.”
“My sister has Lycan DNA. She wasn’t allowed to live in Ethica and we had to leave.” I thought that was pretty obvious.
“That explains why your sister is here. Not you.” Lisa paused to let a beam of sunlight shining through the branches overhead warm her face. “It also doesn’t explain why you walk as if you’ve been unchained for the first time in your life.”
I looked at my feet, surprised we’d come this far without me noticing.
“Before we enter grade school, we have to take aptitude tests to see where our placements will be and which parts of our personality need adjusting so we can live in a peaceful society. My father tested me early
because I had some issues as a young child. I was highly sensitive to emotions and it could be overwhelming. It started causing…”
It felt strange speaking the truth out loud, but I took a deep breath and committed to it. “Episodes. My hands would grow warm and my body would shake. Sometimes it would get so bad that I’d black out. He taught me ways to calm myself without needing their medications. We spent
months practicing with ice water on my hands until I could mentally
recreate the sensation. I learned to keep a level balance to squeak by on the tests. There were a few things I couldn’t hide like above standard results in empathy. He was able to alter those scores though so I didn’t stand out. But I’ve looked over my shoulder my whole life, and now I’m free from that worry.”
“Your father kept you from your magic?” Her face twisted into a mask of disgust and pity.
I didn’t want her sympathy.
She couldn’t understand the world we lived in, not when her world was as free as this.
I raised my chin with the need to protect him even in his death. “No.
My father saved me.”
Lisa was silent for a moment and then she shook her head. “Well,
this gives us more information. Although every person can learn to harness the magic, true witches are born as a special conduit. It’s as if nature breathed a whisper of a kiss at their birth, choosing each one to be a vessel of the energy of the earth. We’ll have to figure out your unique calling, but people like you and I don’t have a choice to shut off our power. I assume that’s why you have those episodes as you call them. You were rejecting your basic nature and it was harming you.”
“I think I learned to turn it off pretty well since I’ve never used it.” My sarcasm fell on deaf ears.
“You blacked out because you tried to block it.” Lisa watched me expectantly, waiting for me to draw my own conclusions.
Alright then.
I picked apart her words to look for the science, or magic, based facts in order to make sense of it all.
“You’re saying that magic is an energy or life force of nature and some people feel it more strongly. Like how emotions can be felt more intensely by certain people.”
“Smart girl.” She touched the tip of her nose. “Now imagine what you could do with your power if you learn how to use it since you don’t have to hide anymore.”
The breeze picked up around us, lifting the leaves and dancing
across my skin. Even though my heart felt lighter, a deep tired settled into my bones.
I was too old for fanciful notions and daydreams. If it didn’t involve protecting Coral, why should I care?
But a nagging thought called to me on the wind that this all had to mean something so maybe I needed to try and understand. “Okay. What do we do now?”
“Now we head back before the tea gets cold and the girls eat all the brownies.” Lisa reached for my hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze as
she guided us back the way we came. “Then you’ll come visit me next week and we’ll start working through these blocks you built that are stopping you from reaching your full potential.”
