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Chapter no 38

The War of Two Queens (Blood and Ash, #4)

I sat quietly beside Poppy as she slept under the walnut tree, having fallen asleep mere moments after placing her cheek on my rolled cloak. I didn’t want to disturb her, but I also couldn’t stop myself from touching her. It was as if I were under some sort of compulsion. I’d readjusted the cloak draped over her half a dozen times. I’d toyed with her hair, smoothing the wispy strands that had fallen on her cheek, and then waited hopefully for the breeze to undo my work so I had a good reason for touching her again.

It was all ridiculous. Perhaps even a bit obsessive, but the contact was grounding, especially in the dark and quiet. My hand shook slightly as I pulled the cloak up to her shoulder. The contact stopped the looming and panicked fear that drove my mind back to that cell.

Dragging my gaze from her, I looked over to where Malik was chained to one of the trees. His chin was down against his chest, but I knew he was awake.

And I was willing to bet that he was plotting his escape.

I didn’t know what to think when it came to Malik, but one thing was clear. He wasn’t loyal to Isbeth. It wasn’t the Blood Queen he sought to return to.

It was his heartmate.

Still, I didn’t think I could ever forgive him.

I wasn’t even sure I could forgive my parents for their lies.

Kieran drifted out of the night, coming to my side. He crouched beside me, his voice low. “I’ll watch over her.”

The fist of emotion clenched. “I don’t know if I want to speak to him.” Kieran eyed Malik, his jaw tense. “You don’t want to, but you need to,

and you should.”

“Was that supposed to be wise advice?”

“Someone has to impart wisdom around here.”

I smirked, letting my hand fall from my mouth. “Hopefully, we find a person to take on that role.”

Kieran chuckled quietly as he glanced at Poppy. “You know, she never slept like this when you were gone. She hardly slept at all. And when she did, there wer almost always nightmares. I think that’s why she sleeps so deeply now. Her body is trying to make up for the loss.”

I closed my eyes.

Hearing all of that… Fuck, it was a kick to the heart. I reached over, my fingers grazing her cheek just so I could feel her. “If I could take back any pain she suffered, I would.”

“But you wouldn’t change a thing you did.” “No.”

He let out a heavy sigh. “What Reaver said earlier…”

I turned my head to him, a faint sliver of moonlight cutting across his cheek and one eye. “The Joining?”

Kieran nodded. “Reaver wasn’t even sure if it would block a Primal curse.”

“It could, though.”

A long moment passed as he stared down at Poppy. “I don’t want either of you to feel like you have to do that for me. We’ll find Malec, and then we’ll kill that bitch.”

I studied him. The line of his jaw was hard. Set. Determined. I’d seen that expression a thousand times. Like when we left for Solis to find the Maiden. He hadn’t been on board with the idea, but he’d stood beside me the entire time. As resolved then as he was when I’d ordered him to remain in Atlantia while I went on my idiotic quest to kill the Blood Queen and King all those years ago. I knew the slight rise of his lips meant that he was reluctantly amused, something I’d seen a lot of when he was first around Poppy. I knew what he looked like when he was furious and when he’d been ripped apart by grief. I’d seen him go utterly cold. Empty. I knew his face well enough to know when he looked upon someone he cared deeply about. Those fine, barely noticeable lines of tension around his mouth disappeared. Kieran softened. He’d done that when he looked at Elashya— whenever he spoke of her. He softened in almost the same way now when he looked upon Poppy.

I reached over, clasping his shoulder. “We are not brothers of the same blood. We are not friends due to some bond,” I told him, and his gaze met mine. “We are not loyal to each other because of courtesy or tradition or title. We have always been above all that. And, in a lot of ways, we’re two halves of the same whole. Different than Poppy and me, but not that much different. You know that.”

Kieran closed his eyes.

“Poppy and I have spoken about it.”

“I figured that’s what you were off doing.” He paused. “Well, one of the things I figured you two were off doing.”

I grinned as I watched him. “When it comes to the Joining, it’s not because we feel as if we need to. It’s because we want to,” I told him. “It’s for you as much as it will be for us.”

Kieran swallowed again. “I just wanted you to know—wanted her to know—that I don’t expect it.”

“We both know that.”

He cleared his throat. “So, you did talk about it?”

“We did.” I squeezed his shoulder. “And you know what our answer is

—what she decided.”

“I do.” Kieran’s eyes opened. “And how do you feel about that?” “You know how I feel about it.”

A grin appeared. “Intrigued?”

“I’m always in a state of constant intrigue when it comes to her,” I admitted.

“Yeah,” he breathed, looking down at her. “I bet she had so many questions.”

I grinned. “All valid ones you probably secretly wished she’d asked you so you could feel useful.”

Kieran laughed under his breath. “Yeah, I do.”

“I wanted her to take the time to make sure this is what she wants,” I told him, and he nodded. “If she still wants to do the Joining, we’ll do it when we return from the Blood Forest.”

“That’s good. I want her to be sure.”

His gaze flicked to me. “Go talk to your brother. She’ll be fine with me.”

“I know.” Giving his shoulder one last squeeze, I rose and left. When I looked back, Kieran had taken my place beside her, watchful and alert, and

that warmed my chest.

I made my way across the small clearing. Malik showed no awareness of my approach, but he was aware. All those ugly emotions crowded my chest as I knelt in front of him. I said nothing. Neither did he for several moments. When he did speak, I fucking wished he hadn’t.

“You hate me.”

Jaw clenching, I twisted my neck from side to side. Did I? Yes. No.

“Wouldn’t blame you if you did.” He stretched out a leg. “I know you looked for me this whole time. I heard what the Descenters called you. The Dark One—”

“Except you were the only Dark One that ever mattered.”

His shoulders tensed as he continued. “I didn’t want you to look for me. I wanted you to give up on it. Prayed that you did. And I kept thinking you would hear about me—about a man called Elian, who was often seen at Wayfair. That you would know, would assume, that I’d betrayed you and would give up. You didn’t. Should’ve known better. You were always a stubborn brat—”

“I don’t give a fuck about any of that. You don’t even want to know what I would do for Poppy, so I get it. You did it for your heartmate.” The moment the words were spoken, I breathed how godsdamn true they were. “It’s what I did to Poppy to free you. I lied to her. Betrayed her. And, yeah, that’s on me. Something I’ve got to work out. But it’s also what you did to her that I cannot fathom, no matter what you believed she would do as an adult. She was a child. And you—who abhorred violence of any kind— never would’ve even considered harming a child.”

Malik said nothing.

That ugly fist of emotion clenched tighter. “It doesn’t matter that you weren’t able to follow through on it. She got hurt because of you, Malik. Bad.”

“I know,” he said in a ragged way as if it hurt him to admit it. wanted to hurt him for even acknowledging it.

“Do you? Do you know the scars that none can see? How they run so damn deep in her? Your actions tormented her for years.” I lowered myself onto one knee, planting a hand in the cool grass to stop myself from planting it in his face. “You left her there to die.”

Malik’s head lifted then. Identical eyes met mine. “I didn’t. She tried to tell you that back in Stonehill. How do you think she survived that night?

Primal god or not, she hadn’t entered her Culling yet.” He leaned forward as far as the chain would allow. “You know that means she would’ve died if left there. None of the others who survived the night would’ve been able to get her out of there. I did. I took her back to Carsodonia, and that fucking

—” A tremor coursed through him, and his laugh was low. Harsh. “I didn’t leave her there.”

I stared at him. Poppy had said that he’d gotten her out of Lockswood. He’d spoken the truth. But did it matter? “Is that supposed to redeem you somehow?”

“Fuck, no. Because you’re right. I was the cause of those scars—hidden or not.” Malik slumped against the tree. “I saw Penellaphe. Not often. Isbeth kept her away from most, but I saw her before they placed her in that veil. I saw what my actions had done. And trust me when I say it should bring you a little peace to not have seen the aftermath when it was so new.”

I rose swiftly and took a step toward him, stopping short when I saw Kieran do the same across the clearing. I turned away from my brother, dragging in the cool night air until it dampened some of the rage.

“Did Alastir ever tell anyone that he saw me?” I turned to him.

“Because he did.” Holy fuck. “No.”

Malik’s eyes closed. “He saw and recognized me. I don’t know if I should feel relieved or not that he kept that to himself.”

But had he? Or was that something else our parents had lied about? Was that why they’d believed Malik gone to them? To Atlantia? Why they’d pushed so hard for me to take the throne?

“That night, when I looked into Penellaphe’s eyes and saw the Consort, I believed Cora then. You know, that she was right,” he said after a moment. “That Penellaphe would end the Blood Crown. But over the years, I realized that it didn’t matter who Penellaphe was in her heart. All that mattered was whether Isbeth found a way to exploit her power.” His eyes opened. “And you know she will. You saw it at Stonehill. In Oak Ambler. Isbeth stokes her anger, and Poppy responds with rage.”

“Shut up.”

“And when she completes her Culling, it won’t be rage she responds with. It will be death. It will be exactly what Isbeth is counting on. Something—”

I shot forward, closing my hand around Malik’s throat. “Poppy will never destroy a kingdom, let alone a realm. No matter what Isbeth does,” I told him, aware that Kieran had risen again but remained at Poppy’s side. “She, unlike her mother and me, is able to control her anger.”

“Do you know how badly I want to believe that?” His voice broke.

I went cold as I held his gaze. “If you even think of harming her now, I swear to the gods I will tear you apart, limb from limb.”

“If I wanted to try something, I would’ve made a move when she was younger and returned to Wayfair,” he bit out. “I haven’t. Neither has Millicent.”

“Yeah, that’s right. Millicent said it had to be me once she finishes the Culling.”

“And that wasn’t easy for her to say to you.”

“She didn’t appear to struggle that much with the words.”

“Millie doesn’t know her sister, but she wouldn’t choose that kind of end for her. She’s just trying to protect the people.” He held my stare. “And I hate that you even had to hear that. I do. To carry that kind of knowledge…that it will soon only be you who can stop her.”

“Don’t feel too badly for me, brother.” I dug my fingers into his windpipe just enough to cause him to flinch. “For I won’t lose one second of sleep to it because I would never do such a thing, nor would she give me a reason to.”

“And if you’re wrong?” he forced out.

“I’m not.” I let go of his throat and backed off before I did something I might regret. “We’re going to find Malec. We’re going to bring him to Isbeth.”

“But what the draken said about the Joining—”

“We haven’t done it.” I stared up at the sky, unsure of why I’d even admitted that.

“Fuck. For real? You’re married to your heartmate and haven’t Joined? You? Kieran? Hell…” A little of the old Malik I knew slipped in then. “I just assumed you had. Apparently, so did the draken.” He paused. “Will you? It might not work against a Primal curse, but—”

“That’s none of your fucking business. But, Joined or not, I won’t risk it.” I faced him. “Neither will Poppy.”

Malik glanced over at Kieran. He had returned to Poppy’s side, sitting in a way that had him bent over half her body as if he were shielding her. “You

sure you aren’t Joined?”

“Yes,” I said wryly. “Positive.” “Huh,” he murmured.

Several long moments passed as I stared down at him. “Why didn’t you ever try to take her life again when she was young and vulnerable?” I asked, even though I wasn’t sure I should know. Because as I’d said, Poppy was far better at controlling her anger than I was. “Why didn’t Millicent if she too believed in the prophecy?”

Malik gave another shake of his head. “That’s her sister. Millie couldn’t do it. Didn’t matter that Penellaphe was never supposed to know about her.”

“And you? You stopped believing in what Cora said.”

“I…I just couldn’t do it. And by the time she was old enough that I no longer saw her as a child, they sent her to Masadonia,” he said, his eyes thin slits. “And by the end, I’d heard of the Dark One. You. And I figured…”

I tensed. “You figured what?”

“That you would kill her to get back at the Blood Queen.”

Cursing under my breath, I looked away. There was a brief time when I would’ve done just that. Before I met Poppy. When I knew her only as the Maiden. Those brief moments, though, fucked with my head, even now.

I dragged a hand over my face. I still didn’t know if Malik having a change of heart mattered. Or if it ever would. I knelt once more. “Do you or do you not want to defeat Isbeth and the Blood Crown?”

Malik’s eyes hardened into chips of amber. “I want to see them burn.” “What about Millicent?” I asked.

“She wants the same.” His gaze fell to where Poppy slept and then returned to mine. “She wants to be free of her mother. To finally be able to live.”

“If that’s what you really want, you won’t run back to the capital and get yourself killed. You’ll fight beside us. You’ll help us find Malec and then kill Isbeth. You will help us end this.”

“I will help you,” Malik said. “I won’t try to escape.”

I took that in, wanting to believe what he claimed as badly as he wanted to believe what I said about Poppy. Problem was, that faith wasn’t gained by words. Faith was earned by actions. “There’s something else I need to know about that night in Lockswood. What in the hell was up with that rhyme?”

“What?” He frowned. “What rhyme?”

“The pretty poppy one. Pick it and watch it bleed.” I searched his features.

“If that’s a rhyme, it sounds about five levels of fucked up,” Malik said. “But I have no idea what you’re talking about. I’ve never even heard anything like that.”

 

 

The battlements of the Rise surrounding Padonia came into view as we crested the rocky hill the following morning. Anticipation and resolve rose swiftly, as did a bit of awe. The Wisteria Woods I’d seen the night before now crowded the earthen road and the city of Padonia itself, their trailing limbs of varying shades of blue and purple giving way to the deep crimson of the outer edges of the Blood Forest.

Poppy was clearly taken with the beauty, her gaze crawling over every inch of the landscape. I hoped it helped her forget that we’d passed the road to Lockswood no more than an hour ago. Her shoulders hadn’t relaxed until the wisterias became more visible. Still, she’d been quiet most of the morning.

Shifting in the saddle, I glanced over at Malik. Between our conversation last night and the upcoming reunion with our father, I was caught up in my head and hoping to the gods that I wasn’t making a huge- ass mistake by removing the bone chain from his wrists and allowing him to ride freely.

I just hadn’t wanted our armies’ first sight of their Prince to be one of him in chains.

Poppy folded a hand over the arm I’d encircled her waist with as she turned to the side, looking up. “Are you okay?”

“Not sure,” I admitted, glancing down at her. “Been thinking about what I’m going to say to my father.”

“What have you come up with?”

“Nothing that’s suitable for repeating,” I said with a dry laugh.

She glanced forward as the bridge over the River of Rhain became visible through the twining vines of bluish-purple. “We can delay this if you

need more time.”

“We don’t need to do that.” I kissed the top of her head. “It’s best if I get this over with.”

The tops of many of the tents became visible, and it looked as if the bulk of the armies had camped outside the Rise. A risky move, but one that had most likely been decided in favor of not destroying the fields inside.

From the town, a low, rumbling roar gained our attention. I slowed the horse as Kieran stopped alongside us, the sound of hooves and paws reaching our ears. “We’re about to have company.” I squeezed her hips and then dismounted. I reached for her, and she placed her hand in mine without question or hesitation. The horse we rode was only now getting used to Kieran in his wolven form, and I had a feeling we were about to be swamped by many more. I didn’t want him throwing Poppy.

Her lips pursed. “I still cannot believe I don’t have better hearing or vision. Ridiculous.”

“Or shift into anything,” I reminded her as the noise grew louder, closer. “That, too.”

“You’re perfect as you are.” I bent, kissing the corner of her mouth. “Average hearing and all.”

“That was corny,” she said, grinning as she peered at me through a fringe of lashes with those fractured green-and-silver eyes. “But cute.”

A white wolf was the first to burst through the wisteria vines, racing straight toward us. There was no stopping my smile as Delano all but launched himself in my direction.

“Oh, dear,” Poppy murmured, calming the nervous horse.

I caught the damn wolven, laughing as I stumbled back. Delano wasn’t the largest wolven by any means, but he was still heavy as an ox and strong as one, too. I ended up on one knee and tried to—well, calm the furry, wiggling mass that was Delano as he pressed his head into mine.

“Missed you, my man.” Clasping the sides of his head, I held him tightly until a fawn-colored wolven identical to Kieran but smaller in weight and height nudged him out of the way.

My chest warmed as I embraced Netta. She was a little less sedate in her eagerness, only nearly toppling me on my ass once. “Missed you, too.”

“What about me?” came a drawl.

I smoothed a hand over the top of Netta’s head as I said, “Didn’t think about you once, Emil.”

“Ouch,” the Atlantian said with a laugh, and then in a softer voice, I heard him say, “I knew you would get him.”

Looking up, I saw the auburn-haired bastard take Poppy’s hand in his and hold it to the gold and steel armor adorning his chest. For once, I didn’t want to punch his throat through his spine. Only because the adoration in his stare was that of respect.

And because he released her hand quickly.

Other wolven surrounded me, and I gave up, remaining on my knee as they each came to either brush against me or push their head against mine. I gladly waited. For a wolven to do such a thing was a sign of respect, and I was honored to be on the receiving end.

When I was finally able to rise, another emotion rocked me. It was seeing Poppy greeted in the same way—watching her turn to bury her face in the fur of Delano’s neck and then hold Netta tightly to her. Hearing her laughter as the wolven pressed into her. Her acceptance of them—that shining love in her bright eyes—and their clear worship of her did something to my chest and my fucking eyes.

That was my wife. My heartmate.

Godsdamn.

Clearing my throat, I looked at the tall Atlantian standing before me. “Held back,” Naill said thickly. “Didn’t want to get trampled.”

Laughing, I closed the distance between us, embracing him. “Good to see you.”

“As it is to see you.” His arm hung around my shoulders. “Hasn’t been right without you.”

I blew out a ragged breath. “But I’m back now.” “I know you are. Just don’t leave us again.” “Don’t plan on it.”

Naill gave me one last squeeze before stepping back. He caught my left wrist. The glance was brief, but his amber eyes turned hard. “We’re going to make them pay for this.”

“We are.” I clasped our hands with my other.

When Naill moved to the side, Perry quickly replaced him and pulled me in for a one-armed embrace. The armor he wore dug into my chest, but I didn’t care. Neither of us spoke for a long moment, and then he said roughly, “You look good.”

“Feeling that way,” I told him. “You’ve been keeping an eye on Delano?”

“Always. It’s like a twenty-four-hour assignment.” Perry laughed, leaning back, his amber eyes shining. “Not once did any of us doubt that Kieran and our Queen would find you. Not for one damn second.”

My throat thickened. “Neither did I.”

Exhaling slowly, Perry stepped back and finally looked to where Malik stood. The arm around my shoulders tensed. “Gods, it’s really him.”

“Yeah.” I watched Delano approach Malik. The other wolven watched closely, cautiously. Their uncertainty regarding the Prince hung heavy in the air.

“He looks…” Naill joined us, and I noticed a muscle flexing in Perry’s jaw.

“He looks nothing like I expected,” Emil finished.

In other words, he didn’t look like the messy pile of flesh and bones I had when I returned from several decades of captivity.

Emil clasped my hand, and I pulled the fucker in for a close, tight embrace. “Delano said Malik didn’t want to return?” he asked quietly.

Perry glanced at us. “And that Poppy told him it was complicated.”

“It is.” I turned, slipping an arm around Poppy as she came to stand beside me, but I didn’t take my gaze off my brother.

Malik knelt in front of Delano as Kieran crept close, eyeing both of them. My brother spoke, but even I couldn’t pick up on the words. Whatever he said, though, Delano responded with a slight nudge of his head against Malik’s hand.

The act sent a small shudder through Malik and didn’t go unnoticed by the other wolven. The tension thickening the air eased. Poppy pressed against my side, her palm resting just below my chest as Malik placed a trembling hand on the top of Delano’s bowed head. Malik’s eyes closed as Poppy’s fingers curled into my shirt, his features pinching as he turned his head, dragging his shoulder along his cheek. I knew what Poppy had to be sensing. The emotion was clearly etched into Malik’s face. Sorrow.

Preela, Malik’s bonded wolven, had been Delano’s sister.

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