By the time Elena reached her locker, the numbness was wearing off and the lump in her throat was trying to dissolve into tears. But she wouldnโt cry at school, she told herself, sheย wouldnโt.ย After closing her locker, she made for the main exit.
For the second day in a row, she was coming home from school right after the last bell, and alone. Aunt Judith wouldnโt be able to cope. But when Elena reached her house, Aunt Judithโs car was not in the driveway; she and Margaret must have gone out to the market. The house was still and peaceful as Elena let herself in.
She was glad for that stillness; she wanted to be alone right now. But, on the other hand, she didnโt exactly know what to do with herself. Now that she finallyย couldย cry, she found that tears wouldnโt come. She let her backpack sag to the floor in the front hall and walked slowly into the living room.
It was a handsome, impressive room, the only part of the house besides Elenaโs bedroom that belonged to the original structure. That first house had been built before 1861, and had been almost completely burned in the Civil War. All that could be saved was this room, with its elaborate fireplace framed by scrolled molding, and the big bedroom above. Elenaโs fatherโs great-grandfather had built a new house, and Gilberts had lived in it ever since.
Elena turned to look out of one of the ceiling-to-floor windows. The glass was so old that it was thick and wavery, and everything outside was distorted, looking slightly tipsy. She remembered the first time her father had showed her that wavery old glass, when she had been younger than Margaret was now.
The fullness in her throat was back, but still no tears would come. Everything inside her was contradictory. She didnโt want company, and yet she was achingly lonely. Sheย didย want to think, but now that she was trying to, her thoughts eluded her like mice running from a white owl.
White owl โฆ hunting bird โฆ flesh eater โฆ crow, she thought. โBiggest crow Iโve ever seen,โ Matt had said.
Her eyes stung again. Poor Matt. Sheโd hurt him, but heโd been so nice about it. Heโd even been nice to Stefan.
Stefan.ย Her heart thudded once, hard, squeezing two hot tears out of her eyes. There, she was crying at last. She was crying with anger and humiliation and frustrationโand what else?
What had she really lost today? What did she really feel for this stranger, this Stefan Salvatore? He was a challenge, yes, and that made him different, interesting. Stefan was exotic โฆ exciting.
Funny, that was what guys had sometimes told Elenaย sheย was. And later she heard from them, or from their friends or sisters, how nervous they were before going out with her, how their palms got sweaty and their stomachs were full of butterflies. Elena had always found such stories amusing. No boy sheโd ever met in her life had made her nervous. But when sheโd spoken to Stefan today, her pulse had been racing, her knees weak. Her palms had been wet. And there hadnโt been butterflies
in her stomachโthere had been bats.
She was interested in the guy because he made her feel nervous? Not a very good reason, Elena, she told herself. In fact, a very bad reason.
But there was also that mouth. That sculpted mouth that made her knees weak with something entirely different than nervousness. And that night-dark hairโher fingers itched to weave themselves into its softness. That lithe, flat-muscled body, those long legs โฆ and thatย voice.ย It was his voice that had decided her yesterday, making her absolutely determined to have him. His voice had been cool and disdainful when talking to Mr. Tanner, but strangely compelling for all that. She wondered if it could turn night-dark as well, and how it would sound saying her name, whispering her nameโฆ.
โElena!โ
Elena jumped, her reverie shattered. But it wasnโt Stefan Salvatore calling her, it was Aunt Judith rattling the front door open.
โElena? Elena!โ And that was Margaret, her voice shrill and piping. โAre you home?โ
Misery welled up in Elena again, and she glanced around the kitchen. She couldnโt face her auntโs worried questions or Margaretโs innocent cheerfulness right now. Not with her eyelashes wet and new tears
threatening any minute. She made a lightning decision and quietly slipped out the back door as the front door banged shut.
Once off the back porch and into the yard, she hesitated. She didnโt want to run into anyone she knew. But where could she go to be alone?
The answer came almost instantly. Of course. Sheโd go see Mom and Dad.
It was a fairly long walk; almost to the edge of town but over the last three years it had become familiar to Elena. She crossed over Wickery Bridge and climbed up the hill, past the ruined church, then down into the little valley below.
This part of the cemetery was well-kept; it was the old section that was allowed to run slightly wild. Here, the grass was neatly trimmed, and bouquets of flowers made splashes of bright color. Elena sat down by the big marble headstone with โGilbertโ carved into the front.
โHi, Mom. Hi, Dad,โ she whispered. She leaned over to place a purple impatiens blossom sheโd picked along the way in front of the marker. Then she curled her legs under her and just sat.
Sheโd come here often after the accident. Margaret had been only one at the time of the car crash; she didnโt really remember them. But Elena did. Now she let her mind leaf back through memories, and the lump in her throat swelled, and the tears came easier. She missed them so much, still. Mother, so young and beautiful, and Father, with a smile that crinkled up his eyes.
She was lucky to have Aunt Judith, of course. It wasnโt every aunt who would quit her job and move back into a little town to take care of two orphaned nieces. And Robert, Aunt Judithโs fiancรฉ, was more like a stepfather to Margaret than an uncle-to-be by marriage.
But Elena remembered her parents. Sometimes, right after the funeral, she had come out here to rage at them, angry with them for being so stupid as to get themselves killed. That was when she hadnโt known Aunt Judith very well, and had felt there was nowhere on earth she belonged anymore.
Where did she belong now? she wondered. The easy answer was, here, in Fellโs Church, where sheโd lived all her life. But lately the easy answer seemed wrong. Lately she felt there must be something else out there for her, some place she would recognize at once and call home.
A shadow fell over her, and she looked up, startled. For an instant, the two figures standing over her were alien, unfamiliar, vaguely menacing.
She stared, frozen.
โElena,โ said the smaller figure fussily, hands on hips, โsometimes I
worryย about you, I really do.โ
Elena blinked and then laughed shortly. It was Bonnie and Meredith. โWhat does a person have to do to get a little privacy around here?โ she said as they sat down.
โTell us to go away,โ suggested Meredith, but Elena just shrugged. Meredith and Bonnie had often come out here to find her in the months after the accident. Suddenly, she felt glad about that, and grateful to them both. If nowhere else, she belonged with the friends who cared about her. She didnโt mind if they knew she had been crying, and she accepted the crumpled tissue Bonnie offered her and wiped her eyes. The three of them sat together in silence for a little while, watching the wind ruffle the stand of oak trees at the edge of the cemetery.
โIโm sorry about what happened,โ Bonnie said at last, in a soft voice. โThat was really terrible.โ
โAnd your middle name is โTact,โโ said Meredith. โIt couldnโt have been that bad, Elena.โ
โYou werenโt there.โ Elena felt herself go hot all over again at the memory. โItย wasย terrible. But I donโt care anymore,โ she added flatly, defiantly. โIโm finished with him. I donโt want him anyway.โ
โElena!โ
โI donโt, Bonnie. He obviously thinks heโs too good forโfor Americans. So he can just take those designer sunglasses and โฆโ
There were snorts of laughter from the other girls. Elena wiped her nose and shook her head. โSo,โ she said to Bonnie, determinedly changing the subject, โat least Tanner seemed in a better mood today.โ
Bonnie looked martyred. โDo you know that he made me sign up to be the very first one to give my oral report? I donโt care, though; Iโm going to do mine on the druids, andโโ
โOn the what?โ
โDroo-ids. The weird old guys who built Stonehenge and did magic and stuff in ancient England. Iโm descended from them, and thatโs why Iโm psychic.โ
Meredith snorted, but Elena frowned at the blade of grass she was twirling between her fingers. โBonnie, did you really see something yesterday in my palm?โ she asked abruptly.
Bonnie hesitated. โI donโt know,โ she said at last. โIโIย thoughtย I did then. But sometimes my imagination runs away with me.โ
โShe knew you were here,โ said Meredith unexpectedly. โI thought of looking at the coffee shop, but Bonnie said, โSheโs at the cemetery.โโ
โDid I?โ Bonnie looked faintly surprised but impressed. โWell, there you see. My grandmother in Edinburgh has the second sight and so do I. It always skips a generation.โ
โAnd youโre descended from the druids,โ Meredith said solemnly. โWeโll, itโs true! In Scotland they keep up the old traditions. You
wouldnโtย believeย some of the things my grandmother does. She has a way to find out who youโre going to marry and when youโre going to die. She told me Iโm going to die early.โ
โBonnie!โ
โShe did. Iโm going to be young and beautiful in my coffin. Donโt you think thatโs romantic?โ
โNo, I donโt. I think itโs disgusting,โ said Elena. The shadows were getting longer, and the wind had a chill to it now.
โSo who are you going to marry, Bonnie?โ Meredith put in deftly.
โI donโt know. My grandmother told me the ritual for finding out, but I never tried it. Of courseโโBonnie struck a sophisticated poseโโhe has to be outrageously rich and totally gorgeous. Like our mysterious dark stranger, for example. Particularly if nobody else wants him.โ She cast a wicked glance at Elena.
Elena refused the bait. โWhat about Tyler Smallwood?โ she murmured innocently. โHis fatherโs certainly rich enough.โ
โAnd heโs not bad-looking,โ agreed Meredith solemnly. โThat is, of course, if youโre an animal lover. All those big white teeth.โ
The girls looked at each other and then simultaneously burst into laughter. Bonnie threw a handful of grass at Meredith, who brushed it off and threw a dandelion back at her. Somewhere in the middle of it, Elena realized that she was going to be all right. She was herself again, not lost, not a stranger, but Elena Gilbert, the queen of Robert E. Lee. She pulled the apricot ribbon out of her hair and shook the hair free about her face.
โIโve decided what to doย myย oral report on,โ she said, watching with narrow eyes as Bonnie finger-combed grass out of her curls.
โWhat?โ said Meredith.
Elena tilted her chin up to gaze at the red and purple sky above the hill. She took a thoughtful breath and let the suspense build for a
moment. Then she said coolly, โThe Italian Renaissance.โ
Bonnie and Meredith stared at her, then looked at each other and burst into whoops of laughter again.
โAha,โ said Meredith when they recovered. โSo the tiger returneth.โ Elena gave her a feral grin. Her shaken confidence had returned to her.
And though she didnโt understand it herself, she knew one thing: she wasnโt going to let Stefan Salvatore get away alive.
โAll right,โ she said briskly. โNow, listen, you two. Nobody else can know about this, or Iโll be the laughingstock of the school. And Caroline would just love any excuse to make me look ridiculous. But Iย doย still want him, and Iโm going to have him. I donโt know how yet, but I am. Until I come up with a plan, though, weโre going to give him the cold shoulder.โ
โOh,ย weย are?โ
โYes,ย weย are. You canโt have him, Bonnie; heโs mine. And I have to be able to trust you completely.โ
โWait a minute,โ said Meredith, a glint in her eye. She unclasped the cloisonnรฉ pin from her blouse, then, holding up her thumb, made a quick jab. โBonnie, give me your hand.โ
โWhy?โ said Bonnie, eyeing the pin suspiciously. โBecause I want to marry you. Why do you think, idiot?โ โButโbutโOh, allย right.ย Ow!โ
โNow you, Elena.โ Meredith pricked Elenaโs thumb efficiently, and then squeezed it to get a drop of blood. โNow,โ she continued, looking at the other two with sparkling dark eyes, โwe all press our thumbs together and swear. Especially you, Bonnie. Swear to keep this secret and to do whatever Elena asks in relation to Stefan.โ
โLook, swearing with blood is dangerous,โ Bonnie protested seriously. โIt means you have to stick to your oath no matter what happens, no matterย what,ย Meredith.โ
โI know,โ said Meredith grimly. โThatโs why Iโm telling you to do it. I remember what happened with Michael Martin.โ
Bonnie made a face. โThat was years ago, and we broke up right away anyway andโOh, all right. Iโll swear.โ Closing her eyes, she said, โI swear to keep this a secret and to do anything Elena asks about Stefan.โ
Meredith repeated the oath. And Elena, staring at the pale shadows of their thumbs joined together in the gathering dusk, took a long breath and said softly, โAnd I swear not to rest until he belongs to me.โ
A gust of cold wind blew through the cemetery, fanning the girlsโ hair out and sending dry leaves fluttering on the ground. Bonnie gasped and pulled back, and they all looked around, then giggled nervously.
โItโs dark,โ said Elena, surprised.
โWeโd better get started home,โ Meredith said, refastening her pin as she stood up. Bonnie stood, too, putting the tip of her thumb into her mouth.
โGood-bye,โ said Elena softly, facing the headstone. The purple blossom was a blur on the ground. She picked up the apricot ribbon that lay next to it, turned, and nodded to Bonnie and Meredith. โLetโs go.โ
Silently, they headed up the hill toward the ruined church. The oath sworn in blood had given them all a solemn feeling, and as they passed the ruined church Bonnie shivered. With the sun down, the temperature had dropped abruptly, and the wind was rising. Each gust sent whispers through the grass and made the ancient oak trees rattle their dangling leaves.
โIโm freezing,โ Elena said, pausing for a moment by the black hole that had once been the church door and looking down at the landscape below.
The moon had not yet risen, and she could just make out the old graveyard and Wickery Bridge beyond it. The old graveyard dated from Civil War days, and many of the headstones bore the names of soldiers. It had a wild look to it; brambles and tall weeds grew on the graves, and ivy vines swarmed over crumbling granite. Elena had never liked it.
โIt looks different, doesnโt it? In the dark, I mean,โ she said unsteadily. She didnโt know how to say what she really meant, that it was not a place for the living.
โWe could go the long way,โ said Meredith. โBut that would mean another twenty minutes of walking.โ
โI donโt mind going this way,โ said Bonnie, swallowing hard. โI always said I wanted to be buried down there in the old one.โ
โWill you stop talking about being buried!โ Elena snapped, and she started down the hill. But the farther down the narrow path she got, the more uncomfortable she felt. She slowed until Bonnie and Meredith caught up with her. As they neared the first headstone, her heart began beating fast. She tried to ignore it, but her whole skin was tingling with awareness and the fine hairs on her arms were standing up. Between the
gusts of wind, every sound seemed horribly magnified; the crunching of their feet on the leaf-strewn path was deafening.
The ruined church was a black silhouette behind them now. The narrow path led between the lichen-encrusted headstones, many of which stood taller than Meredith. Big enough for something to hide behind, thought Elena uneasily. Some of the tombstones themselves were unnerving, like the one with the cherub that looked like a real baby, except that its head had fallen off and had been carefully placed by its body. The wide granite eyes of the head were blank. Elena couldnโt look away from it, and her heart began to pound.
โWhy are we stopping?โ said Meredith.
โI just โฆ Iโm sorry,โ Elena murmured, but when she forced herself to turn she immediately stiffened. โBonnie?โ she said. โBonnie, whatโs wrong?โ
Bonnie was staring straight out into the graveyard, her lips parted, her eyes as wide and blank as the stone cherubโs. Fear washed through Elenaโs stomach. โBonnie, stop it. Stop it! Itโs not funny.โ
Bonnie made no reply.
โBonnie!โ said Meredith. She and Elena looked at each other, and suddenly Elena knew she had to get away. She whirled to start down the path, but a strange voice spoke behind her, and she jerked around.
โElena,โ the voice said. It wasnโt Bonnieโs voice, but it came from Bonnieโs mouth. Pale in the darkness, Bonnie was still staring out into the graveyard. There was no expression on her face at all.
โElena,โ the voice said again, and added, as Bonnieโs head turned toward her, โthereโs someone waiting out there for you.โ
Elena never quite knew what happened in the next few minutes. Something seemed to move out among the dark humped shapes of the headstones, shifting and rising between them. Elena screamed and Meredith cried out, and then they were both running, and Bonnie was running with them, screaming, too.
Elena pounded down the narrow path, stumbling on rocks and clumps of grass root. Bonnie was sobbing for breath behind her, and Meredith, calm and cynical Meredith, was panting wildly. There was a sudden thrashing and a shriek in an oak tree above them, and Elena found that she could run faster.
โThereโs something behind us,โ cried Bonnie shrilly. โOh, God, whatโs happening?โ
โGet to the bridge,โ gasped Elena through the fire in her lungs. She didnโt know why, but she felt they had to make it there. โDonโt stop, Bonnie! Donโt look behind you!โ She grabbed the other girlโs sleeve and pulled her around.
โI canโt make it,โ Bonnie sobbed, clutching her side, her pace faltering.
โYes, you can,โ snarled Elena, grabbing Bonnieโs sleeve again and forcing her to keep moving. โCome on.ย Come on!โ
She saw the silver gleam of water before them. And there was the clearing between the oak trees, and the bridge just beyond. Elenaโs legs were wobbling and her breath was whistling in her throat, but she wouldnโt let herself lag behind. Now she could see the wooden planks of the footbridge. The bridge was twenty feet away from them, ten feet away, five.
โWe made it,โ panted Meredith, feet thundering on the wood. โDonโt stop! Get to the other side!โ
The bridge creaked as they ran staggering across it, their steps echoing across the water. When she jumped onto packed dirt on the far shore, Elena let go of Bonnieโs sleeve at last, and allowed her legs to stumble to a halt.
Meredith was bent over, hands on thighs, deep-breathing. Bonnie was crying.
โWhat was it? Oh, what was it?โ she said. โIs it still coming?โ
โI thought you were the expert,โ Meredith said unsteadily. โFor Godโs sake, Elena, letโs get out of here.โ
โNo, itโs all right now,โ Elena whispered. There were tears in her own eyes and she was shaking all over, but the hot breath at the back of her neck had gone. The river stretched between her and it, the waters a dark tumult. โIt canโt follow us here,โ she said.
Meredith stared at her, then at the other shore with its clustered oak trees, then at Bonnie. She wet her lips and laughed shortly. โSure. It canโt follow us. But letโs go home anyway, all right? Unless you feel like spending the night out here.โ
Some unnameable feeling shuddered through Elena. โNot tonight, thanks,โ she said. She put an arm around Bonnie, who was still sniffling. โItโs okay, Bonnie. Weโre safe now. Come on.โ
Meredith was looking across the river again. โYou know, I donโt see a thing back there,โ she said, her voice calmer. โMaybe there wasnโt
anything behind us at all; maybe we just panicked and scared ourselves. With a little help from the druid priestess here.โ
Elena said nothing as they started walking, keeping very close together on the dirt path. But she wondered. She wondered very much.