I told myself he didnโt recognize me, that heย couldnโtย recognize me. It was impossibleโIโd been disguised, wearing a hat and sunglasses. โThis is Wit,โ Honey told me. โHeโs one of the groomsmen, Michaelโs brother.โ
Brother?ย I thought, because this guy looked nothing like Michael. Wit was wiry, no taller than five foot ten, and had a mop of sandy blond hair that needed a little smoothing back right now.
โTechnically stepbrother,โ Wit said without a hint of a Southern accent. โHeโs my stepbrother.โ
โOh.โ I nodded. โGotcha.โ
โHis mom and my dad got married when I was sixteen,โ he explained. โIโm from Vermont.โ
โSounds freezing,โ I commented, suddenly aware that I was double-fisting ice cream sandwiches like a little kid. How awkward. I hid my hands behind my back to drop them, hoping I could be subtle about it.
โFreezing?โ Wit tilted his head to give me a look. โArenโt you from upstate New York?โ
My spine straightened. โHow do you know that?โ
He gestured at my grandparents, who had silently disappeared and now were heading toward the deck, where Sarah and Michael were whispering to each other.ย Their announcement, I wondered again.ย When is it?
โWhat else did they tell you?โ I asked Wit in a harsher voice than Iโd intended. It just sounded like heโd been briefed or something, and though I
loved her, I wouldnโt put it past Honey to spill the whole story about Ben.
โRelax, Officer,โ he said, putting up his hands. โNot much. Youโre Meredith Fox, youโre eighteen, youโll be a freshman at Hamilton College this fall. Just the bare bones basics.โ He smiled. โThat okay?โ
I didnโt respond, instead turning away so that my body wasnโt angled directly toward his. My stomach swooped, a feeling so unfamiliar and uneasy. Because his grin was the type of imperfect crooked grin that made you want to grin back, and his eyesโฆif you looked past the dark bruise, they were straight out of one of the fantasy novels that Claire and I loved so much. The eye color of an alluring stranger you werenโt sure you should trust but soon had to share a bed with for whatever reason on the quest you were on, then eventually fell so irrevocably in love with that you would die for each other. Basically, an eye color that wasnโt supposed to exist in real life: deep turquoise with gold rings around them.
Iโm not kidding, Claire, I thought.ย Turquoise!
โHow old are you?โ I asked, crossing my arms over my chest.
โNineteen,โ Wit answered, crossing his, too. Like we were in a standoff or something.
Was he mimicking me? โSo youโre in college?โ
A nod. โI just finished my first year at Tulane.โ
โGod, what is with that school?โ I mumbled to myself. Sarah, Michael, Wit, and if everything hadnโt happened, my sister.
โRepeat that?โ Wit said.
โNo, um, nothing.โ The back of my neck prickled. โIt seems like everyone loves that place.โ
Wit was quiet for a moment. โMost people think itโs great.โ He scrubbed a hand through his hair. โBut it all dependsโโ
โHey, everyone!โ Sarahโs voice cut him off, light and lively. We turned to see her standing on one of the deckโs wood benches, Michael at her side. โIf
youโd all gather aroundโฆโ
The party migrated over, surrounding Sarah and her fiancรฉ like they were onstage. I didnโt try to stick with Wit, and he didnโt try to stick with me, so I wedged myself between Eli and Pravika. Luli and Jake were there, too. โWho was that guy you were talking to?โ Pravika asked.
โNo one,โ I answered. โA groomsman.โ
โMichaelโs stepbrother,โ Eli said at the same time, of course having all the information. โThe one who basically got his ass kicked on the ferry.โ He chuckled. โYou saw the bruise, right? Half his face is blue!โ He elbowed me. โDid he tell you who did it?โ
โHe doesnโt know,โ I said quickly, praying that was true. My neck flamed. โApparently the person was wearing sunglasses.โ
The other two nodded, and we refocused on Sarah. โMichael and I are so happy you could join us this week,โ she was saying, โto celebrate family, friends, and our marriage.โ She laughed when everyone clapped, and then her expression fell a little. โBut there is someone very special who wasnโt able to make it. My cousin Claire.โ Her voice quavered, and Michael took her hand.
Just like someone took mine.
โItโs okay,โ Eli whispered. โItโs all right.โ
I nodded and squeezed back as hard as I could.
โThis week is not only about us,โ Sarah said. โItโs also about honoring Claireโs memory.โ She smiledโor tried her best to smile. โAnd I believe I speak for the entire Fox family when I say there is only one way to pay tribute to her.โ
Wait, I thought, heart speeding up.ย What is she talking about?
โDo yโall remember filling out your RSVPs?โ Michael asked after exchanging an almost-imperceptible nod with Sarah. โChecking those boring boxes?โ
โWell, the last one wasnโt boring,โ Sarah said, playfully slapping his chest. โI thought it was intriguing!โ She was now genuinely grinning. โDo you guys remember that one?โ
Having RSVPโd months ago, no one offered up even a nod, but I nearly gasped, the riddle suddenly solved. DO YOU WANT TO PLAY? the silver-edged card had asked, and I checked YES without thinking twice. Neither my parents nor I knew what it meant, but I didnโt want to find myself left out of anything. I wanted to be all in at this wedding.
โAssassin,โ I murmured to myself just as Sarah voiced the word to everyone else. We had unknowingly signed up to play Assassin.ย Iย had unknowingly signed up to play Assassin.
My heart sank at the thought. It was a Paqua Farm tradition. Every summer, we played a Farm-wide game of Assassin, where players used water guns to eliminate one another and become the last active killer. Each person was assigned an initial target, and when they successfully โtook care ofโ said target, they inherited their victimโs. For the couple of weeks we played, the paranoia on The Farm was unparalleled. People hesitated before going on kayak rides together, spied on their targets from the dunes, and even formed secret alliances. It was a ton of fun, and Assassin lore lived on forever.
โMichael and I will not be playing,โ Sarah said as Michael good-humoredly pouted. โWe have too many other obligations.โ She poked him in the cheek. โBut we canโt wait to see you guys battle it out to make Claire proud!โ
My sister had been the undisputed Assassin queen, our most decorated champion. She had taken Assassin so seriously that she had multiple weapons: a water handgun, a Super Soaker, and some jetpack-looking high-pressure soaker with pump action and multiple nozzles.
As I shifted from one foot to the other, Sarah and Michael handed off the torch to our โAssassin Commissioners,โ Wink and Honey.ย Of course, I
realized.ย Thatโs why they knew everything ahead of time.
My grandparents had retired from being active assassins several years ago and now oversaw the entire game as officials. They made the initial assignments, and whenever you eliminated someone, you reported the kill to them. Any disputes between competitors? Any close calls? The commissioners made the final judgment.
โFor those of you who are new to the game,โ Honey said, โthere are only three rules.โ She held up three fingers for emphasis. โNumber one: game play is twenty-four hours a day.โ
โTwenty-four hours?โ I heard someone say. โWhen are we supposed to sleep?โ
Naturally, Wink and Honey ignored this. โNumber two,โ Wink said, โgame play only occurs outdoors.โ
Michaelโs sister raised her hand, and when my grandfather pointed at her, she asked, โWhat constitutes outdoors? Porches? Decks? A patio?โ
โTen feet away from a door,โ Wink said, smirking. โMinimum.โ
โAnd number three,โ Honey said, also smirkingโthey loved this. โNothing is to interfere with official wedding events.โ
โI object!โ Sarah called out at the same time Aunt Christine went, โAbsolutelyย nothing!โ
The wedding party roared with laughter.
* * *
I thought about all Claireโs iconic takedowns as I lay in bed that night, eyes wide open. It wasnโt Dadโs snoring that was keeping me awake or Loki whining in his sleep or even the kitchen sinkโs dripping faucet. No, I could sleep through those.
But I couldnโt sleepย here, in the Annexโs bunk room, without my sister. Itโd always felt so small for two people, but now it seemed too big for only
me. Way too bigโฆandย lonely. โClaire,โ I whispered, and when she didnโt answer, I pushed back my quilt and slid down to the floor.
โMeredith?โ I heard my mom call from the other room, half asleep. Iโd landed on a creaking floorboard. โThat you?โ
โBathroom,โ I quietly called back, then slipped on flip-flops and a sweatshirt. The Vineyardโs temperature dipped at night. But instead of going through the back door toward the woods and the outhouse, I switched on my phone flashlight and crept out the front.
I didnโt know where I was going, really. Just on a walk. There was a sweet-and-salty breeze tonight, so I inhaled deeply and tipped my head back to gaze up at the stars. They were luminous.
Maybe Iโll go to the Big House, I thought.ย Sleep in Honeyโs hammock?ย Except for Claireโs, every bed on the Farm was taken for the wedding. Jake and Luliโs family had moved out of Moor House to make room for the Duprรฉs. Their parents had squeezed into the Camp with Aunt Julia and Aunt Rachel, while Jake and Luli were spending the week in a circle of tents with Pravika, Eli, and other cousins and friends. The Nylon Condo Complex, Eli had dubbed it. Thankfully, no one had mentioned anything about sleeping in Claireโs bed.
I wandered along the well-worn sandy roads, keeping my flashlight pointed at the ground so I didnโt come across any night critters. Nothing had ever happened to me, butย everyoneย had heard Sarah scream bloody murder the time she got skunked on her way back from a beach bonfire with her brothers.
A few minutes later, though, I heard a rustling noise.ย Tree branches swaying, I assumed, until the rustling turned into clear footsteps crunching over bits of broken seashells. I picked up my pace but was unable to tell which direction the person was coming from. All I knew was he or she was walkingย towardย me.
Blood pulsed in my ears. Iโd never beenย scaredย on The Farm before; I didnโt know how to react. My first impulse was to scream, but it was like my mouth had been sewn shut. Then I considered running off into the night, skunks be damned, but my body had gone rigid.
So what I settled on was stopping in my tracks, swallowing hard, and saying in what I hoped was a threatening tone, โI have a knife.โ
โReally?โ a male voice called back. Familiar, but one I couldnโt place after meeting so many people today. โYou have a knife?โ
โYeah,โ I lied. โI do.โ โWhat kind?โ
โSwiss Army,โ I said, thinking of a Netflix documentary Iโd watched with Ben once, all about the history of the knife company. It was random and far from romantic, but Iโd found the intricate design and construction process interesting.
โHmm, a Swiss Army knife.โ A low whistle. โImpressive.โ
I didnโt say anything. The voice sounded closer now, and it was almost unnerving how melodious it was. My toes curled in my flip-flops. Who was I talking to?
โSo I suppose this afternoon wasnโt enough,โ the guy continued. โYou gotta maul my face evenย more?โ
My breath caught in my throat. Crap.
Wit appeared in front of me like magic, the starlight shining on his wicked bruise. I couldnโt tell if it looked better or worse. โOh, um,โ I fumbled. โYou, uh, know it was, mmm, me?โ
โYes.โ
I winced. โHow?โ
โThe hat-and-sunglasses routine only works on TV, Killer.โ
โIโm sorry,โ I blurted. โIt was an accident. I wasnโt paying attention.โ I sighed. โAnd Iโd just been on the phone withโโ
โYour shithead ex,โ Wit finished for me, grinning his crooked grin. โIf Iโm quoting correctly.โ
โYou heard that, too?โ No response.
โWell, thatโs great,โ I mumbled, feeling my neck prickleโpartially out of embarrassment but also because he was still smiling. Smiling with his blond hair mussed and falling across his forehead, and wearing a fraying sweatshirt like mine. My stomach did that strange swooping thing. โWhat are you doing out here?โ I asked, hoping it would stop.
Wit shrugged. โExploring.โ โAt night?โ
โYeah, I wanted to see the stars. Thereโs no light pollution like in the city.โ He paused. โI also wanted to escape the best man and maid of honor banging in the next room.โ
โUgh,โ I said. โReally?โ
โYep.โ Wit nodded. โI mean, you know how people get at weddings.โ
โYeah.โ I nodded, too, Pravikaโs words from earlier coming to mind:
Theyโre perfect for a fling.
But not for me, I thought.ย Family and friends. Itโs all about family and friends.
The ocean drowned out whatever Wit said next, waves crashing hard on the beach. I hadnโt noticed how close to the dunes we were, so I shined my flashlight and motioned for him to follow me so we could find a nook away from the noise. My flip-flops slapped against the sand, and Witโs half-tied sneakers scuffed like he had a habit of not picking up his feet when he walked.
โSo what areย youย doing out here?โ he asked once we sat down, tall grass swishing around us but safe from the wind.
โOh,โ I said, hiding my hands in my sweatshirt pocket. โJust thinking.โ
Wit was silent for a second, pulling up the hood of his own sweatshirt. I thought it was more than obvious what I was thinking about, but he didnโt say Claireโs name, and I was grateful for it. โAssassin, right?โ he eventually guessed. โGearing up for tomorrow?โ
โPerhaps,โ I replied, an attempt at coyness. Wit didnโt need to know how hesitant I was to play. That I hadnโt even opened my envelope yet to find out my first targetโtheyโd been left in each houseโs mailbox earlier. MEREDITH FOX, one was labeled, and inside would be a laminated slip of paper with a single name on it.
โThe rules seem simple enough,โ Wit commented, and I nodded. โBut strategyโฆthere must be a ton of strategy involved. Type of water weapon, if you want to play offense or defense, that kind of thing.โ He shifted so that his leg brushed mine, his striped pajama bottoms against my floral-patterned ones. Was it on purpose? โAlso alliances,โ he added as goose bumps blossomed under the thin fabric. โI bet a ton of alliances form.โ
I stayed silent, realizing where he was going with this. Almost immediately after the announcement had been made, Luli had created a group chat that included Eli, Pravika, Jake, and me.ย Tubing on the Oyster Pond tomorrow, sheโd texted.ย Noon. Tell no one, invite no one. Business to discuss.
Whether I liked it or not, it appeared that I was part of an alliance.
Wit let a beat pass. โIโm assuming you have one already,โ he said. โBeing a skilled veteran and allโโ
โI wouldnโt call myself โskilled,โโ I cut in, turning toward him. Our knees knocked again. โThe best Iโve ever done is five days, and most of that was spent in hiding. My cousin Peter followed me to the old tractor yard one day and shot me before I made it through the barn door.โ I shrugged. โI always take a defensive stance.โ
โSeriously?โ Wit said. โI wouldโve thought the opposite.โ I snorted. โWhyโs that?โ
He laughed, lyrical like his voice. โBecause you threatened to pull a knife on me?โ
โWell, you shouldnโt have snuck up on me like that!โ I said, flustered. My cheeks heated. โYou shouldโve announced yourself!โ
โOkay, yes, I shouldโve said something,โ he conceded, โbut swinging back to alliancesโโ
โI canโt betray mine,โ I told him, because focusing on my friends this week involved staying loyal to them. If Luli needed me to lead her target into a trap, I would do it. Iโd been MIA for over a year, blown off my friendsโ concerned texts and calls, and the fact that they seemed willing to forgive and forgetโฆI couldnโt mess with that.
โI wasnโt asking you to,โ Wit replied. โBut I was wonderingโฆโ He casually flicked some sand at me, and I flicked some back. โโฆif youโd be interested in forming a pact.โ
My ears pricked up.
A pact?
โThink about it,โ Wit said. โWe could really help each other. Youโre on the brideโs side, and Iโm on the groomโsโthere are so many people I donโt know that you do and vice versa.โ
A lump formed in my throat. It was dawning on me that Wit was approaching Assassin exactly like Claireโoffensively and astutely, already planning and plotting. He wouldnโt be searching The Farm for a good hiding spot anytime soon.
โSo instead of you sniffing around and asking everyone and their mother who Michaelโs uncleโs daughter is,โ he continued, โIโd be your go-to source.โ
โAnd instead of solving the mystery of Honeyโs brotherโs third wife,โ I said, liking this more and more, โIโd lay out her entire schedule for you, tell you her favorite Pilates studio in Vineyard Haven.โ
โExactly,โ Wit said. โWeโd keep the information between us, so no rumors about betrayals would flare upโwe wouldnโt tip anyone off.โ He released a deep breath. โWhat do you say?โ
My stomach stirred with excitement. โI think itโs brilliant.โ
โExcellent.โ He smiled and held out his hand. โNow we shake on it.โ
โWait,โ I said before we did, hands hovering inches apart. I could feel the warmth radiating off Witโs skin. โOne more thing.โ
โGo.โ
โIf we hear each otherโs names going around, weโll let the other person know.โ
Wit considered for a moment, then nodded. โDeal.โ I nodded back. โDeal.โ
And so we shook.
* * *
Before sneaking back into the Annex that night, I visited the ancient oak tree on the edge of the lawn and ran my fingers over the notches carved into the trunk. Summer after summer, Claire used an ax to keep track of her victories. โIโm going to win,โ I whispered once Iโd reached the final mark. โIโm going to win this thing.โ