The house was unrecognizable, the entire living room taken over, rearranged around them.
The sofa and Dadโs chair had been removed to make way, the table from the kitchen now in here, extended to seat nine, four more dining chairs borrowed from Je๏ฌย and Sherryโs house. Grandpa didnโt need one, he came with his own.
Two cameras were set up, to record both sides of the elongated table. Ash was behind one of them, the smaller camera that he was trusted with,ย ๏ฌddling with the tripod legs. Flared jeans and aย ๏ฌuorescent green T-shirt covered in happy apples: happles. James was opposite, cameras strategically placed so they didnโt get each other in the shot. Bel had watched as they worked it out, enjoying when Ash was ordered around, how he carried his shoulders, how he closed one eye to study the view๏ฌnder. They hadnโt had time to say one word to each other, which wasย ๏ฌne, because it was hard to be rude to someone with just one word.
Ramsey was hovering around the softbox lights, shifting them by millimeters, seeing what no one else could. Saba was at the back with her headphones and audio equipment: everyone already miked up.
The two caterers were bustling around in the kitchen, heating up the pre-prepared meals in the oven. Rachel watched the chaos and Bel watched
her, movement and chatter everywhere,ย ๏ฌfteen people in a house meant for two.
Grandpa was already positioned at the head of the table one side, Yordan crammed in beside, to help him with his food. Grandpa looked just as lost as Bel felt.
Sheย ๏ฌddled with the new bracelet on her wrist, the chain cold and strange where it pulled against her bone. Rachel had surprised her with it, before everyone arrived. Said she had a lot of birthdays and Christmases to make up for.
โHey,โย Carter said,ย ๏ฌnding her way to Bel through the mayhem.ย โHey.โ
โOK?โย Carter nudged her, elbows clashing.ย โThings feeling more normal yet?โ
Absolutely fucking not,ย thingsย were less normal than ever, and she was even more convinced now that Rachel was a liar. But Bel couldnโt answer that, because she was wearing a live microphone, and Saba was listening in.
โSure,โย she said, which obviously didnโt sound sure enough, because Carter bristled.ย โThanks for helping pick out the bracelet.โย Bel held it out, gold chain against the paleย ๏ฌesh of her wrist. No skulls on this one, but it was a message of some kind, after Rachel slipped up about Belโs old bracelet at the mall.
Carter nodded.ย โRachel wanted to get you something she knew youโd love. And I know you best. Sheโs really trying, you know.โ
โOh, I know,โย Bel said, because whatever she had to say about Rachel, she couldnโt say she wasnโt trying. You had toย try,ย to get away with a lie like how you disappeared for sixteen years and reappeared again. It wasnโt just a bracelet, was it? It was a countermove, after Bel snooped in her room, stole back that sock. A lock to keep her out, and a bracelet to keep her quiet.
โStarters are ready,โย Ramsey called, reemerging from the kitchen.ย โEveryone please take a seat. Ash, James, letโs get rolling. Rachel, could we get you in the middle, on this side?โ
โSure.โย Rachel smiled, dropping down on the chair, bringing her glass of red wine with her.
Bel knew what was going to happen, so she moved faster than Ramsey could, taking a seat on the other side, opposite Rachel. Ramsey caught her with his widened eyes. He came over and bent down to whisper to her.
โI was thinking weโd put you next to your mum,โย he said, treading carefully.
โIโve already sat down.โย Bel beamed up at him. It was too late anyway, Rachelโs mom had already taken the seat to Rachelโs left, and Carter on her right, the rest of the family milling toward the table.
Ramsey chewed his lip.ย โOpposite works better, actually,โย he said, low and secretive, trying to take the win away from her. He moved out of Charlieโs way, already on his third beer, labels peeled o๏ฌย forย ๏ฌlming.
The chatter settled down, everyone waiting to be told what to do. Je๏ฌย was at one end of the table, then Carter, Rachel, Grandma Susan (horsefucker), Yordan and Grandpa on the other end, then Dad, Bel and Sherry.
โItโs nice to see you again, Pat,โย Rachel said, breaking the awkward silence, watching Grandpa as she took another sip of her wine.
Grandpaโs eyes darkened. Yordan whispered something in his ear.
โRay-chul,โย Grandpa repeated it, hacking it into two, like it wasnโt a name at all.
The caterers appeared, holding two plates each, working from the middle out, Rachel and Belย ๏ฌrst. Goatโs cheese and red onion tart. Bel had suggested this one, didnโt think Rachel would go for it. She glanced up, caught Rachel smiling at her. Bel raised her knife and fork in response.
โDig in, everyone,โย Rachel said, like this was her house and she was the host.
Carter took theย ๏ฌrst bite.ย โItโs delicious.โ
โAnna picked it,โย Rachel said.ย โSorry. Bel. Still getting used to that.โ โOh yes.โย Sherry turned to Bel beside her.ย โI forgot you used to be Anna,
itโs been so long.โย Back to Rachel.ย โShe was about six when she insisted on Bel instead, headstrong girl. Seems like sheโs been Bel forever, honestly.โ
โWell,โย Rachel said,ย โI didnโt get the memo.โ
โNo, course not.โย Sherry smiled.ย โLots of new things to get used to. The world too, very di๏ฌerent now. Honestly, you canโt sayย anythingย these days without upsetting somebody.โย Sherryโs fork paused on the way to her mouth.ย โThatโs a nice out๏ฌt, Rachel.โย A peace o๏ฌering of some sort.
Rachelโs eyes darted down to her top.ย โThanks. AnnaโfuckโBel chose it for me.โย One of her hands balled into aย ๏ฌst, knuckles pushing out like hilltops.
Grandmaย ๏ฌinched at theย fuck.ย Oh come on, her daughter had supposedly been kept in a basement for sixteen years, and the part she found unpalatable was that four-letter word?
โNo, you look really great, Rachel,โย Sherry continued.ย โSo skinny. I guess sixteen years of captivity is the best diet there is.โ
Someone dropped a fork.
Carterโs face fell open.ย โMom,โย she hissed, eyes wounded, staring across the table at her.ย โYou canโt say that!โ
Sherry looked at the camera for a moment, then pushed out a laugh.ย โOh, donโt be silly,โย she said.ย โRachel knows Iโm only joking, donโt you?โ
Rachel grinned back, something sharp about it, Bel felt it, even though it was aimed at Sherry. Seemed the Price family had more land mines lying around, live and ticking even after sixteen years. They hadnโt evenย ๏ฌnished their starters and one had already blown up. What happened to those happy tears and hugs of a few days ago?
โAnyone for any more wine?โย Rachel grasped the neck of the bottle.ย โJe๏ฌ? Yordan? Nice to meet you, by the way, Yordan. Is it Bulgaria youโre from?โ
โCan I drink?โย Bel said, throwing out a bomb herself.ย โUm, Iโฆ,โย Rachel began, just as Dad hu๏ฌed,ย โNo.โ โMaybe another time,โย Rachel added.
โI said no,โย Charlie hardened his voice, stabbing his last piece of tart, avoiding Rachelโs eyes.
Bel remembered that thing Dad told Ramsey, about Rachel lighting up rooms for him. Well, she didnโt light them up anymore, in fact, he mostly left the room whenever she walked in. But now they were trapped together
by the whole family and two cameras, sitting on opposite sides of the table. Bel had chosen her side.
โSo, Susan,โย Charlie said, a glare in his eyes from the closest light box.ย โI wondered if you had anything to say to me and the rest of my family, now that Rachel has returned, un-murdered.โ
Grandma put her fork down delicately.ย โThat Iโm very happy, very grateful my daughter is alive and well. My only regret is that Edward didnโt live to see Rachel come home.โย Her eyes misted, patting Rachelโs shoulder.
โIs that it?โย Charlie doubled down, an incredulous smile.ย โNo apologies?โ
โDonโt bother, Dad,โย Bel said quietly.
โWhatโs going on?โย Rachel put her wine down, gazeย ๏ฌicking between the two sides of her family.
โYou can tell her, Susan,โย Charlie said.
โNothing, sweetie.โย Grandma gripped Rachelโs arm.ย โThis is meant to be a happy evening, a celebration.โ
โYou canโt do it, can you?โย Charlie laughed.ย โToo much pride to say sorry even now. I didnโt kill Rachel, did I? Sheโs sitting right there next to you.โ
โMom?โย Rachel looked at her.
Grandmaย ๏ฌddled with her lace scarf.ย โI was so sure heโd killed you. There were no other answers. It just had to be him.โย She wiped a tear that Bel couldnโt see.
โItโs OK,โย Rachel said gently.
โItโs not OK,โย Bel stepped in, less gently.
Grandpaโs eyes followed the conversation, a loaded fork hovering by this mouth, Yordan distracted too.
โIโm sorry, Charlie, OK?โย Grandma dabbed her face with the scarf.ย โYou would understand if something ever happened to Annabel, if she vanished into thin air.โ
โI wish,โย muttered Bel, and right now she did. Sheโd thought this meal would be a cease-๏ฌre, everyone on their best behavior, but course one of
three and look where they were already. Ramsey hovered by the kitchen door, watching intently; he must have been thrilled.
โItโs OK, Mom. Charlie would never hurt me,โย Rachel said, no, she announced, like he wasnโt right here. Dad tensed; Bel could feel it in the air around her. That was confusing: Rachel defending Dad. That had always been Belโs job. Always.
โNow everyone thinks Iโm the bad guy.โย Grandma blew her nose into the napkin.
โNo, they donโt.โย Rachel rubbed her momโs back.ย โIt must have been very hard for you all these years, to be around him, if thatโs what you thought happened. I understand.โ
โWell, that wasnโt much of a problem,โย Charlie said,ย ๏ฌnally drawing Rachelโs eyes.
โWhat do you mean?โ
โWe hardly ever saw your parents.โ
A shadow crossed Rachelโs face; a hurt Bel didnโt understand.ย โMom?โย Rachel said, voice rough at the edges.ย โYou never visited them? Not even for birthdays? Not even once a year?โ
Grandma pulled back from her daughter, sensing the shift, the danger.ย โIt would have been too di๏ฌcult, to see his face, when we thought heโโ
โWhat about Annabel?โย Rachel snapped. Grandmaย ๏ฌinched, but Rachel wasnโtย ๏ฌnished.
โI canโt believe this. Annabel was so young; she needed you. You should have been there for her when I couldnโt.โ
โWe thought he was a killer,โย Grandma protested.
โWell, heโs not!โย Rachel spat.ย โBut that means you chose to leave my daughter alone with the man you were sure had killed me, doesnโt it?โ
โIโm sorry. I did think about suing for custody, butโฆโย Grandmaโs head dropped, breaking eyeline. A disconnect between them, greater than sixteen years.
Bit rich of Rachel, to be mad at everyone else for abandoning Bel.
โIs everyone done?โย Je๏ฌย piped up, awkwardly rubbing his elbow.ย โFood, I mean.โ
The caterers came in to carry the plates away, the table breaking into small, tentative side conversations, Dad checking that Grandpa didnโt need to go home already. Any excuse to leave, to get away. Sherry was talking to Je๏ฌ, so Bel had no one to turn to. She unclipped the microphone from her collar, raised it to her mouth.
โI think the mealโs going really well so far,โย she whispered into it.ย โHappy families.โ
At the back corner, she saw Saba react. Ash too, hands cupped around his headphones behind camera B. He coughed, sti๏ฌing a laugh, which was good, because sheโd said it for him.
Carter was on her own too, Rachel and Grandma Susan still exchanging hissed words. She looked upset; Carter didnโt like confrontation, even when she wasnโt in it. Bel kicked her under the table, praying it was her leg and not Rachelโs. Carter jerked, looking across at her. Her frown became a smile, but it didnโtย ๏ฌx the look in her eyes.
Two huge silver platters arrived, loaded with paella, serving spoons to help themselves.
Charlie picked up one spoon and dropped a load on his plate, staring down at it.
โI did tell her,โย Bel said, under her breath.
โItโs OK, kiddo. I can pick out the shrimp.โย He smiled sadly.ย โDonโt have much of an appetite anyway.โ
Opposite, Rachel passed the platter to Carterย ๏ฌrst. Carter smiled politely, spooning two piles into a mound on her plate, rockfalls of rice and peas.
โNot too much, honey,โย Sherry said across the table.ย โRehearsals this weekend. Donโt want to give Ms. Dunn an excuse not to put you front row.โ
Carter said nothing as she passed the platter back to Rachel. Rachel returned her polite smile, an exchange, but hers seemed more forced, struggling at the corners.
โDancing this, dancing that,โย Je๏ฌย said, waiting for one of the platters to circle around to him.
โItโs important to her, Je๏ฌ,โย Sherry said sharply.ย โYou could give it more attention.โ
โI give it plenty of attention,โย he sni๏ฌed.ย โJust let her spend two hundred bucks on my credit card a couple days ago for somethingย dancing.ย What was it, Car, new leotards or something?โ
Carter stared at her plate, nodding her chin up and down in a tiny movement.
โLook, youโre putting her on the spot now and embarrassing her, Je๏ฌ.โย Sherry snatched the platter out of Belโs hands.ย โItโs an investment in her future.โ
โI didnโt say anything,โย Je๏ฌย said, laughing uncomfortably.ย โJust that if Iโd known how expensive all this dancing stu๏ฌย would be, Iโd have become a criminal mastermind on the dark web instead of working at the Sport Center. My friend Bob from Vermont, he makesโฆoh wait, cameras are on. Never mind.โ
Sherry sighed, sound like a sprung snake, turning her shoulders to abandon Uncle Je๏ฌย on the corner. No part of the table was safe from outbreaks andย ๏ฌare-ups, clearly. They were everywhere since Rachel returned, her fault though Bel didnโt quite know how yet, tension simmering just below the surface. Why were they doing this dinner, again?
Bel looked across the table; Rachel was hiding her eyes, making tracks through her paella with the underside of her fork. Good, at least she wasnโt having a good time either.
No one was really eating, except for Grandpa, slow, steady forkfuls, in his own world, unaware of the explosions going on around him. Carter was eating too, on her last mouthfuls already, maybe so she didnโt have to talk and get drawn into anything.
Rachel followed Belโs eyes to Carter and, without a word, she reached over for the serving spoon and tipped another load of paella onto Carterโs plate.
Sherryย ๏ฌinched, raising herย ๏ฌnger, trying to swallow her mouthful. But she retracted theย ๏ฌnger, didnโt say anything, just another sigh, sharper this time, two coiled snakes.
โThank you,โย Carter said to Rachel quietly, a twitch by her mouth as she dug into her food.
โNo problem, Carter.โย Rachelโs voice echoed as she lowered her face into her glass of wine.
Sherry took a large gulp of her own.
โIs anyone else getting hot?โย Je๏ฌ ๏ฌddled with the seam around his neck.ย โShould I open a window?โ
Ramsey was wide-eyed, entranced. He must have been loving this: didnโt have to direct or nudge at all, the dinner party was on a downward spiral all on its own.
โSo, Charlie.โย Rachel speared a piece of chorizo.ย โCarter tells me you had a girlfriend for two years, you havenโt mentioned her yet. Even moved her into our house for a few months?โย The words dipped up like a question, needling him on purpose. Why would Carter tell Rachel anything like that? Whose side was she on?
Charlie took a sharp swig of his beer.ย โI hadnโt found the right time to bring it up yet, inย private.โย He leaned into the word.ย โHappened a very long time ago. Bel was ten.โ
โEleven,โย Bel stepped in, eyes on Rachel, locking her elbows to put a shield up around both her and Dad, readying her acid tongue.
โApparently this woman was the head juror at your trial for my murder,โย Rachel said, chuckling to herself, a shrimp pirouetting on her fork.
Charlie put down his empty beer.ย โJust a coincidence. Ellen and I bumped into each other years later. She recognized me.โ
Ellen was nice; Bel liked Ellen. And that was the problem, because she knew she would leave eventually, everyone always did. So Bel pushed herย ๏ฌrst, told her she didnโt need or want a new mom. Kids could be cruel, and Bel could be the cruelest. Ellen packed her bags the next day.
โMust have looked pretty strange, though,โย Rachel said, crunching down on the shrimp.ย โDating the woman who found you innocent of your wifeโs murder.โ
โLeastย heย waited until after you were gone,โย Sherry muttered under her breath, wiping her mouth with her sleeve. No one else at the table heard, waiting for Charlieโs response, but Bel had heard, sitting right next to her. She turned and studied her aunt, lips pressed in a tense line. What had she
meant by that? That Rachel had been with someone else before she disappeared? Thereโd been no mention of a relationship in any of the media coverage. Wouldnโt that have been huge news? A viable suspect? What had Sherry meant? Bel tucked that away, inside the knot in her gut, let it feed on her near-empty stomach.
โI was lonely,โย Charlie said, keeping his voice measured and even.ย โIโd grieved you for years. Everyone kept saying I had to move on. It was hard and it didnโt last, so Iโm not sure why you need to bring it up now.โ
โJust making conversation.โย Rachel let her fork dangle, scrape the plate.ย โThatโs what you do at dinner. Youโve hardly been in the house since I returned, so we havenโt had many opportunities to talk inย private.โย She leaned on the word the same way he had.
Dadโs hands dropped into his lap, tightening intoย ๏ฌsts, a muscle ticking in his jaw.
Bel didnโt know what to say, how to defend him, because Rachel was right, Dad was avoiding the house, but whose fault did she think that was?
โMaybe we should call it a day,โย he said, looking over at Grandpa.ย โDessertโs just coming out,โย Ramsey interrupted for theย ๏ฌrst time,
surprising the caterers, keeping Dad in his place.
He set his jaw, like he could make it through dessert, which meant Bel could too, as uneasy as she felt. That ball of tension spinning in her gut, gorging itself on all the unsaid and half-said things. What had Sherry meant?
Her plate was cleared away and another put down in front of her, apple pie with a thick dollop of cream. Another thing sheโd suggested. What was Rachelโs game?
โSo, Pat.โย Rachel turned back to Grandpa.ย โYou turn eighty-๏ฌve in a couple of weeks. I canโt believe it, where has all the time gone?โ
Yes, where exactly did all that time go, Rachel? Grandpa stared blankly ahead, like he hadnโt even heard.
โPlease stop asking him questions,โย Charlie said.ย โHe canโt remember. It will distress him.โ
โI only asked about his birthday.โ
โSomeone wants the yard, donโt they? The Realtorโฆ,โย Grandpa croaked.ย โCarter,โย Sherry hissed quietly.
Carter hesitated, put down her spoon.
โItโs good with the cream,โย Rachel said to her.ย โSherry?โย Je๏ฌย said.
The knot in Belโs gut grew, pulling tighter, the opposite of an explosion, like she might crumble and collapse around it.
โWhereโs Maria?โย Grandpa said, a switch, eyes hard and mean.ย โDad.โย Charlie rested his hand on Grandpaโs arm.ย โMom isnโtโโ โCarter,โย Sherry hissed again, or the snake inside her.
โSheโs just having her dessert, Sherry,โย Rachel said.ย โRachel, I thinkโฆ,โย began Grandma Susan.ย โMaria?โ
โDad, itโs OK.โ
Bel couldnโt take it anymore.
โHey!โย she shouted over the noise, bringing all eyes to her.ย โHey. How about a toast, everyone?โย She stood, chair scraping against theย ๏ฌoor, picking up her half-drunk glass of lemonade.
โAn excellent idea, well done,ย Bel,โย Sherry said, using her name as some kind of weapon, aiming it at Rachel.
Rachel ignored her, picking up her wineglass, smiling up at Bel.
Bel waited for them all to join in, holding their glasses, except Grandpa, who was still looking for Maria. She looked around at everyone, even those behind the cameras, and raised her glass up high, squeezing too hard.
She cleared her throat.
โTo the most fucked-up family in America. Cheers!โ
