UNDER POINTED ADVICE FROM several sources, I limited myself to three fields of study in the upcoming term. I continued Advanced Sympathy with Elxa Dal, held a shift in the Medica, and continued my apprenticeship under Manet. My time was pleasantly full, but not overburdened as it had been last term.
I studied my artificing more doggedly than anything else. Since my search for a patron had come to a dead end, I knew my best chance for self-sufficiency lay in becoming an artificer. Currently I worked for Kilvin and was given relatively menial jobs at relatively low pay. Once I finished my apprenticeship, that would improve. Better still, I would be able to pursue my own projects then sell them on commission for a profit.
If.ย If I was able to keep ahead of my debt to Devi. If I could somehow continue to muster enough money for tuition. If I could finish my apprenticeship under Manet without getting myself killed or crippled by the dangerous work that was done in the Fishery every dayโฆ.
Forty or fifty of us gathered in the workshop, waiting to see the new arrival. Some sat on the stone worktables to get a good view, while a dozen or so students gathered on the iron catwalks in the rafters among Kilvinโs hanging lamps.
I saw Manet up there. He was hard to miss: three times older than any of the other students with his wild hair and grizzled beard. I headed up the stairs and made my way to his side. He smiled and clapped me on the shoulder.
โWhat are you doing here?โ I asked. โI thought this was just for the greenwood who havenโt seen this stuff before.โ
โI thought Iโd play the dutiful mentor today,โ he shrugged. โBesides, this particular display is worth watching, if only for the expressions on everyoneโs faces.โ
Sitting atop one of the shopโs heavy worktables was a massive cylindrical container about four feet high and two feet across. The edges were sealed without any bulky welds, and the metal had a dull, burnished look that made
me guess it was more than simple steel.
I let my gaze wander the room and was surprised to see Fela standing in the crowd, waiting for the demonstration to begin along with the rest of the students.
โI didnโt know Fela worked here,โ I said to Manet. Manet nodded. โOh sure. What, two terms now?โ
โIโm surprised I havenโt noticed,โ I mused as I watched her talking to one of the other women in the crowd.
โSo am I,โ Manet said with a low, knowing chuckle. โBut sheโs not here very often. She sculpts and works with cut tile and glass. Sheโs here for the equipment, not the sygaldry.โ
The belling tower struck the hour outside, and Kilvin looked around, marking the faces of everyone there. I didnโt doubt for a moment that he took note of exactly who was missing. โFor several span we will have this in the shop,โ he said simply, gesturing to the metal container that stood nearby. โNearly ten gallons of a volatile transporting agent:ย Regim Ignaul Neratum.โ
โHeโs the only one that calls it that,โ Manet said softly. โItโs bone-tar.โ โBone-tar?โ
He nodded. โItโs caustic. Spill it on your arm and itโll eat through to the bone in about ten seconds.โ
While everyone watched, Kilvin donned a thick leather glove and decanted about an ounce of dark liquid from the metal canister into a glass vial. โIt is important to chill the vial prior to decanting, as the agent boils at room temperature.โ
He quickly sealed off the vial and held it up for everyone to see. โThe pressure cap is also essential, as the liquid is extremely volatile. As a gas it exhibits surface tension and viscosity, like mercury. It is heavier than air and does not dissipate. It coheres to itself.โ
With no further preamble Kilvin tossed the vial into a nearby firewell, and there was the sharp, clear sound of breaking glass. From this height, I could see the firewell must have been cleaned out specially for this occasion. It was empty, just a shallow, circular pit of bare stone.
โItโs a shame heโs not more of a showman,โ Manet said softly to me. โElxa Dal could do this with a little more flair.โ
The room was filled with a sharp crackling and hissing as the dark liquid warmed itself against the stone of the firewell and began to boil. From my high vantage, I could see a thick, oily smoke slowly filling the bottom of the well. It didnโt behave like fog or smoke at all. Its edges didnโt diffuse. It pooled, and hung together like a tiny, dark cloud.
Manet tapped me on the shoulder, and I looked at him just in time to avoid being blinded by the initial burst of flame as the cloud caught fire. There were dismayed noises from all around and I guessed most of the others
had been caught unaware. Manet grinned at me and gave a knowing wink. โThanks,โ I said and turned back to watch. Jagged flames danced across
the surface of the fog, colored a bright sodium-red. The additional heat made the dark fog boil faster, and it swelled until the flames were licking toward the top of the waist-high lip of the firewell. Even from where I stood on the catwalk I could feel a gentle heat on my face.
โWhat the hell do you call that?โ I asked him quietly. โFire-fog?โ
โWe could,โ he responded. โKilvin would probably call it an atmospherically activated incendiary action.โ
The fire flickered and died all at once, leaving the room filled with the acrid smell of hot stone.
โIn addition to being highly corrosive,โ Kilvin said, โin its gaseous state the reagent is flammable. Once it warms sufficienctly, it will burn on contact with air. The heat that this produces can cause a cascading exothermic reaction.โ
โCascading huge Goddamn fire,โ Manet said.
โYouโre better than a chorus,โ I said softly, trying to keep a straight face.
Kilvin gestured. โThis container is designed to keep the agent cold and under pressure. Be mindful while it remains in the workshop. Avoid excessive heat in its immediate vicinity.โ With that, Kilvin turned and headed back into his office.
โThatโs it?โ I asked.
Manet shrugged. โWhat else needs to be said? Kilvin doesnโt let anyone work here unless theyโre careful, and now everyone knows what to be careful of.โ
โWhy is it even here?โ I asked. โWhatโs it good for?โ โScares the hell out of the first-termers.โ He grinned. โAnything more practical than that?โ
โFear is plenty practical,โ he said. โBut you can use it to make a different type of emitter for sympathy lamps. You get a bluish light instead of the ordinary red. A little easier on the eyes. Fetch outrageous prices.โ
I looked down into the workshop, but couldnโt see Fela anywhere in the milling bodies. I turned back to Manet. โWant to keep playing dutiful mentor and show me how?โ
He absently ran his hands through his wild hair and shrugged. โSure.โ
I was playing at Ankerโs later that night when I caught the eye of a beautiful girl sitting at one of the crowded tables in back. She looked remarkably like Denna, but I knew that to be nothing more than my own fancy. I hoped to see her enough that I had been catching glimpses of her out of the corner of my eye for days.
My second glance told me the truthโฆ.
Itย wasย Denna, singing along with half the folk in Ankerโs to โDroverโs Daughters.โ She saw I was looking in her direction and waved.
Her appearance caught me so much by surprise that I completely forgot what my fingers were doing and my song fell to pieces. Everyone laughed, and I took a grand bow to hide my embarrassment. They cheered and booed me in equal amounts for a minute or so, enjoying my failure more than they had the song itself. Such is human nature.
I waited for their attention to drift away from me, then made my way casually to where Denna was sitting.
She stood to greet me. โIโd heard you were playing on this side of the river,โ she said. โBut I canโt imagine how you keep the job if you fall apart every time a girl gives you a wink.โ
I felt myself flush a little. โIt doesnโt happen that often.โ โThe winking or the falling apart?โ
Unable to think of a response, I felt myself flush redder, and she laughed. โHow long will you be playing tonight?โ She asked.
โNot much longer,โ I lied. I owed Anker at least another hour.
She brightened. โGood. Come away with me afterward, I need someone to walk with.โ
Hardly believing my good luck, I made a bow to her. โAt your service certainly. Let me go and finish up.โ I made my way to the bar where Anker and two of his serving girls were busy pulling drinks.
Unable to catch his eye, I grabbed hold of his apron as he hurried past me. He jerked to a stop and barely avoided spilling a tray of drinks onto a table of customers. โGodโs teeth boy. Whatโs the matter wโye?โ
โAnker, Iโve got to go. I canโt stay till closing tonight.โ
His face soured. โCrowds like this donโt come for the askinโ. They ainโt goinโ to stay without a little song or summat to entertain โem.โ
โIโll do one more song. A long one. But Iโve got to go after that.โ I gave him a desperate look. โI swear Iโll make it up to you.โ
He looked at me more closely. โAre ye in trouble?โ I shook my head. โItโs a girl then.โ He turned his head at the sound of voices calling for more drinks, then waved me away, briskly. โFine, go. But mind you, make it a good, long song. And youโll owe me.โ
I moved to the front of the room and clapped my hands for the roomโs attention. Once the room was moderately quiet I began to play. By the time I struck the third chord everyone knew what it was: โTinker Tanner.โ The oldest song in the world. I took my hands from the lute and began to clap. Soon everyone was pounding out the rhythm in unison, feet against the floor, mugs on tabletops.
The sound was almost overwhelming, but it faded appropriately when I
sang the first verse. Then I led the room in the chorus with everyone singing along, some with their own words, some in their own keys. I moved to a nearby table as I finished my second verse and led the room in the chorus again.
Then I gestured expectantly toward the table to sing a verse of their own. It took a couple of seconds for them to realize what I wanted, but the expectation of the whole room was enough to encourage one of the more tipsy students to shout out a verse of his own. It gained him thunderous applause and cheers. Then, as everyone sang the chorus again, I moved to another table and did the same thing.
Before too long folk were taking initiative to sing out their own verses when the chorus was over. I made my way to where Denna waited by the outer door, and together we slipped out into the early evening twilight.
โThat was cleverly done,โ she said as we began to stroll away from the tavern. โHow long to you think theyโll keep it up?โ
โThat will all depend on how quickly Anker manages to pull down drinks for the lot of them.โ I came to a stop at the edge of the alley that ran between the back of Ankerโs tavern and the bakery next door. โIf you will excuse me a moment, I have to put my lute away.โ
โIn an alley?โ she asked.
โIn my room.โ Stepping lightly, I moved quickly up the side of the building. Right foot rain barrel, left foot window ledge, left hand iron drainpipe, and I swung myself onto the lip of the first story roof. I hopped across the alley to the roof of the bakery and smiled at her startled intake of breath. From there it was a short stroll upward and I hopped back across to the second story roof of Ankerโs. Tripping the latch to my window, I reached through and set my lute lightly on my bed before heading back down the way I had come.
โDoes Anker charge a penny every time you use his stairs?โ she asked as I neared the ground.
I stepped down from the rainbarrel and brushed my hands against my pants. โI come and go at odd hours,โ I explained easily as I fell into step beside her. โAm I correct in understanding that you are looking for a gentleman to walk with you tonight?โ
A smile curved her lips as she looked sideways at me. โQuite.โ โThat is unfortunate,โ I sighed. โI am no gentleman.โ
Her smile grew. โI think that you are close enough.โ โI would like to be closer.โ
โThen come walking with me.โ
โIt would please me greatly. Howeverโฆโ I slowed my walk a bit, my smile fading into a more serious expression. โWhat about Sovoy?โ
Her mouth made a line. โHeโs staked a claim on me then?โ
โWell, not as such. But there are certain protocols involvedโฆ.โ โA gentlemanโs agreement?โ she asked acidicly.
โMore like honor among thieves, if you will.โ
She looked me in the eye. โKvothe,โ she said seriously. โSteal me.โ
I bowed and made a sweeping gesture toward the world. โAt your command.โ We continued our walk, the moon was shining, making the houses and shops around us seem washed and pale. โHow is Sovoy anyway? I havenโt seen him for a while.โ
She waved a hand to dismiss the thought of him. โI havenโt either. Not for lack of trying on his part.โ
My spirits rose a bit. โReally?โ
She rolled her eyes. โRoses! I swear you men have all your romance from the same worn book. Flowers are a good thing, a sweet thing to give a lady. But it is always roses, always red, and always perfect hothouse blooms when they can come by them.โ She turned to face me. โWhen you see me do you think of roses?โ
I knew enough to shake my head, smiling. โWhat then? If not a rose what do you see?โ
Trapped. I looked her up and down once, as if trying to decide. โWell,โ I said slowly. โYouโll have to forgive us men. You see, itโs not an easy thing to pick a flower to fit a girl, if youโll excuse my expressionโฆ.โ
She grimaced. โPick a flower.ย Yes, Iโll excuse it this time.โ
โThe trouble is, when you gift a girl with flowers your choice can be construed so many different ways. A man might give you a rose because he feels you are beautiful, or because he fancies their shade or shape or softness similar to your lips. Roses are expensive, and perhaps he wishes to show through a valuable gift that you are valuable to him.โ
โYou make a good case for roses,โ she said. โThe fact remains I do not like them. Pick another flower to suit me.โ
โBut what suits? When a man gives you a rose what you see may not be what he intends. You may think he sees you as delicate or frail. Perhaps you dislike a suitor who considers you all sweet and nothing else. Perhaps the stem is thorned, and you assume he thinks you likely to hurt a hand too quick to touch. But if he trims the thorns you might think he has no liking for a thing that can defend itself with sharpness. Thereโs so many ways a thing can be interpreted,โ I said. โWhat is a careful man to do?โ
She cast a sidelong look to me. โIf the man is you, Iโd guess he would spin clever words and hope the question was forgotten.โ She tilted her head. โIt isnโt. What flower would you pick for me?โ
โVery well, let me think.โ I turned to look at her, then away. โLetโs run down a list. Dandelion might be good; it is bright, and there is a brightness about you. But dandelion is common, and you are not a common creature.
Roses we have dealt with and discarded. Nightshade, no. Nettleโฆperhaps.โ She made a face of mock outrage and showed me her tongue.
I tapped a finger to my lips as if reconsidering. โYou are correct, except for your tongue it doesnโt suit you.โ
She huffed and crossed her arms.
โWild oat!โ I exclaimed, startling a laugh from her. โItโs wildness suits you, but it is a small flower, and bashful. For that as well as other,โ I cleared my throat, โmore obvious reasons, I think weโll pass the wild oat by.โ
โPity,โ she said.
โDaisy is a good one,โ I bulled ahead, not letting her distract me. โTall and slender, willing to grow by roadsides. A hearty flower, not too delicate. Daisy is self-reliant. I think it might suit youโฆ. But let us continue in our list. Iris? Too gaudy. Thistle, too distant. Violet, too brief. Trillium? Hmmm, thereโs a thing. A fair flower. Doesnโt take to cultivation. The texture of the petalsโฆโ I made the boldest motion of my young life and brushed the side of her neck gently with a pair of fingers. โโฆsmooth enough to match your skin, just barely. But it is too close to the ground.โ
โThis is quite a bouquet youโve brought for me,โ she said gently. Unconsciously, she raised a hand to the side of her neck where I had touched her, held it there a moment, then let it fall.
A good sign or a bad one? Was she wiping my touch away or pressing it close? Uncertainty filled me more strongly than before and I decided to press ahead with no more blatant risks. I stopped walking. โSelas flower.โ
She stopped and turned to look at me. โAll this and you pick a flower I donโt know? What is a selas flower? Why?โ
โIt is a deep red flower that grows on a strong vine. Its leaves are dark and delicate. They grow best in shadowy places, but the flower itself finds stray sunbeams to bloom in.โ I looked at her. โThat suits you. There is much of you that is both shadow and light. It grows in deep forests, and is rare because only skilled folk can tend one without harming it. It has a wondrous smell and is much sought and seldom found.โ I paused and made a point of examining her. โYes, since I am forced to pick, I would choose selas.โ
She looked at me. Looked away. โYou think too much of me.โ I smiled. โPerhaps you think too little of yourself.โ
She caught a piece of my smile and shone it back at me. โYou were closer early in your list. Daisies, simple and sweet. Daisies are the way to win my heart.โ
โI will remember it.โ We started walking again. โWhat flower would you bring me?โ I teased, thinking to catch her off guard.
โA willow blossom,โ she said without a secondโs hesitation. I thought for a long minute. โDo willows have blossoms?โ She looked up and to the side, thinking. โI donโt think so.โ
โA rare treat to be given one then.โ I chuckled. โWhy a willow blossom?โ โYou remind me of a willow.โ She said easily. โStrong, deep-rooted, and hidden. You move easily when the storm comes, but never farther than you
wish.โ
I lifted my hands as if fending off a blow. โCease these sweet words,โ I protested. โYou seek to bend me to your will, but it will not work. Your flattery is naught to me but wind!โ
She watched me for a moment, as if to make sure my tirade was complete. โBeyond all other trees,โ she said with a curl of a smile on her elegant mouth, โthe willow moves to the windโs desire.โ
The stars told me five hours had passed. But it seemed hardly any time at all before we came to the Oaken Oar where she was staying in Imre. At the doorway there was a moment that lasted for an hour as I considered kissing her. I had been tempted by the thought a dozen times on the road as we talked: when we paused on Stonebridge to watch the river in the moonlight, underneath a linden tree in one of Imreโs parksโฆ.
At those times I felt a tension building between us, something almost tangible. When she looked sideways at me with her secret smile, the tilt of her head, the way she almost faced me made me think she must be hoping for me to doโฆsomething. Put my arm around her? Kiss her? How did one know? How could I be certain?
I couldnโt. So I resisted the pull of her. I did not want to presume too much, did not want to offend her or embarrass myself. Whatโs more, Deochโs warning had made me uncertain. Perhaps what I felt was nothing more than Dennaโs natural charm, her charisma.
Like all boys of my age, I was an idiot when it came to women. The difference between me and the others is that I was painfully aware of my ignorance, while others like Simmon bumbled around, making asses of themselves with their clumsy courting. I could think of nothing worse than making some unwelcome advance toward Denna and having her laugh at the awkwardness of my attempt. I hate nothing more than doing things badly.
So I made my good-byes and watched her enter the side door of the Oaken Oar. I took a deep breath and could hardly keep from laughing or dancing about. I was so full of her, the smell of the wind through her hair, the sound of her voice, the way the moonlight cast shadows across her face.
Then, slowly, my feet settled to the ground. Before I had taken six steps I sagged like a sail when the wind fades. As I walked back through the town, past sleeping houses and dark inns, my mood swung from elation to doubt in the space of three brief breaths.
I had ruined everything. All the things I had said, things that seemed so
clever at the time, were in fact the worst things a fool could say. Even now she was inside, breathing a sigh of relief to finally be rid of me.
But she had smiled. Had laughed.
She hadnโt remembered our first meeting on the road from Tarbean. I couldnโt have made that much of an impression on her.
Steal me,ย she had said.
I should have been bolder and kissed her at the end. I should have been more cautious. I had talked too much. I had said too little.