I STARED AT MY PHONE, which I’d just half placed, half dropped onto the counter in front of me. Frustration boiled up inside of my chest as I placed a hand on either side of the phone. Then I took a step back and dropped my chin to my chest. I closed my eyes as the conversation with Shelby ran through my mind.
I hated that I had to call. I hated that Charlotte had passed away. I hated how broken this family had become.
Most of all, I hated that even after all of these years, the sound of Shelby’s voice made my heart change cadence.
It was a ridiculous reaction, especially when she was the one who’d left. She was the one who had walked away. Sure, I’d let her go. After all, what could I do? She’d had that determined fire in her gaze, and after being burned a few too many times, I learned to get out of her way.
But now, standing in the kitchen of Harmony Inn, I cursed myself for not being stronger. I was going to have to face her once more. If I had tried to fix what had broken so long ago, maybe I wouldn’t feel so anxious. If only I had enough courage to explain why I pushed Clint away like I did, I might not be here right now. But the night I walked in on Clint with Winnie and told him to shape up or ship out, I’d never expected that he would take the latter option. I thought he’d do the right thing by Shelby and stop sleeping around.
I’d been wrong.
I will never forget the anger in her eyes as she stared at me. I wanted a chance to explain myself, but she never gave it to me. I feared that bringing
her back here once more was going to be as pleasant as sticking my hand into the cage of a hungry lion. Unpredictable and would most likely leave me missing a limb.
“This is going to be a disaster,” I muttered under my breath. “I-sas-er,” echoed next to me.
I glanced over to see Belle sitting in her highchair. Her hair was slicked back from the cereal milk she was now wearing. Fruit Loops dotted her clothes and the floor, and her bowl was turned over, creating a milk ocean in her tray. Despite looking like a complete mess, she grinned up at me.
“That’s right, Belle,” I said as I grabbed a clean dishrag from the drawer next to me and flipped on the warm tap water. “This is a disaster.”
Belle shrieked with laughter and began slapping the milk puddle on her highchair tray. That caused me to quicken my pace to clean her up before the whole kitchen became a milk Chernobyl.
It took some wrangling, but I finally got her out of the high chair and wiped down. She puttered around the kitchen, opening cupboard doors, while I focused on cleaning the high chair and floor. With everything straightened out, I called for Belle to follow me as I pushed through the kitchen door and out into the inn’s dining room.
Breakfast was now over, and it was time for me to clean things up. Charlotte always emphasized how important the guest was, and even though I was still reeling from the events early this morning, there was a sort of calm that came from keeping up with old habits.
Plus, I wasn’t ready to face what Monday was going to bring to me. I’d lived the last few years with Charlotte in my everyday life, but I knew I was nowhere near prepared to visit with her granddaughter once again.
A year ago, Charlotte had moved out to the small cottage a few hundred yards from the inn after she broke her hip. It was harder for her to get around, and stairs were out of the question. Plus, there was no way she was going to allow a lift to be installed in the inn because it would ruin the ambiance she was trying to create.
Instead, she forced me to move into the keeper’s quarters while she
“took her retirement” in the new building.
It made her absence not quite as pronounced. But, even after six months of her being gone, I was still struggling with the weight of running this place by myself. Life was harder without her here, and in the sappy moments of my life, I allowed myself to admit that I missed her.
A lot.
“Belle,” I called to my daughter. She was pulling on the tablecloth, causing the dishes to slide across the dark oak table.
She giggled and moved to hide under the table. Realizing that I had a small window to actually get some work done before she emerged to wreak havoc once more, I began to gather up the dishes in a grey tub I’d stashed in the far credenza. Once they were picked up, I called for Belle to follow me as I pushed back into the kitchen.
Luckily, she was in a good mood, and a few seconds later, she followed me through the door. It didn’t take me long to get the dishes loaded and for the hum of the dishwasher to fill the air. I grabbed a granola bar from the pantry and pulled the wrapper off.
The distraction of cleaning up after breakfast gave me a break from thinking about Shelby. But now that everything was taken care of and Belle was coloring a big blob of purple on the whiteboard I’d installed to keep her from drawing on the walls—my mind returned to our conversation and the will that was going to be read in just a few short days.
That was, if she decided to come at all. I picked up my phone from off the counter and glanced down at it. No new messages. No missed calls. She hadn’t called back to cancel. I was cautiously optimistic that she might actually come.
“Give it time,” I muttered as I slipped my phone into my back pocket, bringing myself back down to reality. I knew better than to get my hopes up. Especially when it came to Shelby.
Belle glanced over at me for a moment before returning to her masterpiece.
I folded my arms and clicked my tongue a few times. Then I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. So many memories flooded my mind, and it was hard to process them all. I wanted to be stronger. I needed to be, for my daughter and for this inn. But I felt like I was failing.
I felt a small hand land on my leg, causing me to open my eyes. Belle was standing in front of me with her eyes wide. I shoved down my feelings and shot her a big smile. “What’s up, pumpkin?”
“Daddy sad?” she asked in her small toddler voice.
I knelt down in front of her and pulled her into a hug. “I’m not sad. Not when I have you.” I buried my face in her neck and blew a raspberry.
She shrieked and wiggled away before she wrapped her small arms around my neck and squeezed. I held her tight as I stood. When Tamara, my ex, left Belle on my doorstep three years ago, I thought my world had ended. I wasn’t the father type. I had issues of my own.
But I couldn’t just abandon Belle. Tamara said she was in no condition to raise a child and her future was up to me, and then she left. I went from a bachelor to a father overnight.
Thankfully, Charlotte saw my predicament and gave me a job and a place to stay. Even though her daughter had divorced my father years ago, she still saw me as her grandson. We’d been close before, but after Belle came into our lives, we were like a real grandmother and grandson.
Which was why I had no idea how I was going to make it through the ups and downs of fatherhood without her support. She’d been my rock, and with her gone, I was alone.
Realizing that I was spiraling, I pushed away my pain and pulled back, glancing down and giving Belle a big smile. “Wanna go for a ride in the car?” I asked as I hoisted her up.
She giggled and nodded, gripping onto my shirt as I bounced her a few times.
I locked up the small office off the side of the kitchen and left a note at the front desk for the guests. The only guests we currently had were an older couple who were here visiting their kids and a business man who spent most of his time in town. I let them know I was out and that they could call me if they needed anything.
Once Belle was buckled in her car seat, I climbed behind the wheel and started up the truck. I needed to go somewhere or I was going to go mad.
My gaze drifted over to Charlotte’s cottage as I drove past it. My throat tightened, and I cleared it as I focused my attention back onto the road in front of me. Belle needed me to be her rock, and that started with me getting my crap together.
Truth was, I’d known that Charlotte would pass away eventually. She’d been ninety-three and had numerous health issues. I just never thought that it would really happen. She was such a force in my life that death never seemed like an option for her.
Until it was.
I blinked a few times with the inn in my review mirror, clarity returning. Even though I’d never emotionally prepared for Charlotte’s passing, she
had. Her only regret, one that she mentioned on numerous occasions, was her relationship with Shelby.
I drummed my fingers on the steering wheel as Belle’s preschool songs blared on the radio. She was holding her doll by one arm and staring out the window as she bobbed her head to the beat. I smiled as I brought my attention back to the road.
Once we got into downtown Harmony, I zeroed in on Godwin’s grocery store. Belle was almost out of applesauce, and there was no way I wanted to be on the receiving end of her temper tantrum if we ran out.
I pulled into the nearest parking spot and turned off the engine. Once Belle was out of her seat and into the shopping cart, we took off toward the sliding doors. Cool air conditioning washed over me as I pushed inside. It was busy for midmorning on a Friday.
Betty Godwin was running the only open register. She looked up when I came in and gave me a wide smile.
I nodded in her direction as I pushed the cart into the produce section. “Let me know if you need anything, Miles,” she called after me.
I raised a hand to let her know I heard her, but kept my focus forward. It wasn’t until I was down the cereal aisle that Belle started to get cranky, so I used my elbows to steer the cart so I could peel her a banana.
“Ow,” a soft feminine voice followed the cart’s sudden halt.
I straightened and glanced up to see a woman, not much younger than me, standing there, rubbing her ankle. Heat pricked the back of my neck as I shot her a sheepish look. “I’m so sorry,” I said as I handed the banana to Belle. “She was desperate. I should have parked this thing instead of multitasking.”
The annoyed look in the woman’s eyes faded as she glanced over at Belle and then back to me. She shook her head. “And I was too focused on which cereal to buy to realize I was standing in the wrong lane.”
I glanced around the aisle. “Wrong lane?”
“You know.” She moved her hands in each direction like a stewardess signaling where the exits were.
“Ah.” Then I chuckled. “I guess I’ve never adhered to the rules of the road here at Godwin’s.”
Her smile was soft as she shrugged.
I glanced around. “Are you new here? I’ve never seen you around.” And then I felt stupid. That sounded like an extremely cheesy pickup line.
Which was ridiculous because I was in no shape to date anyone.
She nodded. “I’m here visiting my aunt.”
“Your aunt?” I furrowed my brow. “Who’s your aunt?”
She reached out and pulled a box of Raisin Bran down from the shelf. “Betty Lou Thompson.”
I nodded. “I know Miss Thompson. She tried to swindle me into buying her antique table set.” I leaned forward. “I know a knockoff when I see one.”
The woman dropped her jaw as her eyes widened. Her eyes sparkled as she let out a soft gasp. “Are you calling my aunt a swindler?”
Heat warmed my cheeks. “No, no…” I swallowed. “That’s not what I meant.”
The woman chuckled as she stepped closer to me. “That’s okay. I once found an IKEA sticker in her garbage, so…”
I quirked an eyebrow. “Really?”
She pinched her lips together and nodded as she pulled back. “But you didn’t hear it from me.” Then she pretended to lock her lips.
“Mum’s the word,” I said as I brought my finger to my lips.
A silence fell between us, but neither of us moved. I wasn’t sure what I was doing. I had no interest in dating anyone right now. But there was something about being noticed by a woman that had me glued to my spot. My life had become taking care of Belle and the inn. I was slowly losing myself and the things that I liked.
I wanted to feel like a man again, and the way this woman was looking at me made my heart pound in my chest.
“I didn’t catch your name other than you’re Miss Thompson’s niece.”
She dropped her box of Raisin Bran into her basket and then stepped forward, extending her hand. “Laura Smith,” she said.
I took her hand. Her skin was soft and warm, and it shocked me. It had been years since I’d touched a woman…and I missed it. “Miles Lachlan,” I replied when she raised her eyebrow as if she were expecting a response.
“It’s nice to meet you, Miles.” She slipped her hand from mine, and then I felt stupid when I realized I hadn’t let it go. Luckily, she had already turned her attention to Belle. “And who is this?”
Belle was halfway through eating her banana, but the sudden attention from a stranger had her lifting her arm up and shielding her face. She turned her body away from Laura.
“This is Belle,” I said when Laura turned to look at me. Her eyes were wide with worry, and I didn’t want her to think she’d done something wrong. “She’s my suddenly shy daughter.” I reached out to poke Belle in the rib. She squirmed but remained hidden.
“Oh, your daughter?” Laura asked, her gaze dropping down to my ring finger.
“I’m not married,” I blurted out. Then I mentally punched myself.
Might as well have loser at love tattooed on my forehead.
Laura met my gaze and smiled. “Ah,” she said. Then she leaned closer. “Neither am I.”
There was a softness to her features and a look in her eye that got my heart racing. I raised my eyebrows, not sure what to say. And then, “Oh, nice,” emerged before I could police it.
Laura giggled and straightened. “Maybe two unattached people can meet up for drinks sometime?”
I wanted to say yes. I wanted a night away from the inn. To feel like myself once more. But I knew that was a pipe dream. I was a father and a business owner. I didn’t have time for dating.
“I’m super—”
Laura held up her hand. “Don’t finish that sentence.” She set her basket down on the floor and opened her purse. “Here’s my business card. If you decide that you’re tired of saying no, give me a call. I’m around for the week and would love to help you relieve some stress.” Her gaze raked down my body. “Whatever that might take.”
My brain fell into autopilot. Somehow, I managed to grab her card, slip it into my back pocket, mutter something halfway intelligible, and head down the aisle without much thought.
Once I rounded the corner, I blew out my breath. Belle had emerged from her hiding place and was staring at me. I was pretty sure she had no idea what had just happened, but I couldn’t help but feel like she was judging me. I squeezed the shopping cart handle with both hands and rolled my shoulders.
It had been a while since any woman had shown me that kind of attention. Once I moved in with Charlotte, most of the women I talked to were silver haired. They always told me, “I have a granddaughter I’d love for you to meet.”
But to be here, in Godwin’s of all places, flirting with a woman?
It shook me.
“All done,” Belle said as she dropped the rest of her banana, which had turned to mush, onto the ground.
I snapped out of my trance a little too late as I dove for the food, but it hit the floor before I could stop it. I growled as I picked it up and searched for a garbage, reality hitting me in the face.
This was why I didn’t date. This was why I avoided the opposite s*x. My life was too complicated. There was no way a woman would want to walk into this mess. If I didn’t even know how to sort my own crap out, how was I going to bring someone else into it?
The business card felt like a brick in my back pocket as I finished up my shopping and headed for the checkout lane. Thankfully, I didn’t run into Laura while Betty rang up my items. I focused my attention on bagging them as she pushed them down the conveyor to me. When I was all rung up, I took the receipt and bid her farewell.
Once Belle and the groceries were safely packed into my truck, I returned the cart and climbed into the driver’s seat. I slammed the door and gripped the steering wheel in front of me, vowing that when I got home, I was going to toss Laura’s business card.
Dating and I had never mixed in the past, and I was fairly certain we wouldn’t mix well now.
I was never going to find love again.
