The game room at Hawthorne House sent Max into a state of nearly apoplectic joy. The room was lines with shelves, the shelves filled with hundredsโmaybe even thousandsโof board games from around the world. We started with Settlers of Catan. Grayson decimated us. We worked our way through four other games, none of which Iโd even heard of before. As
we were debating our next selection, Jameson strolled into the room.
โHow about an old Hawthorne standard?โ he suggested wickedly. โStrip bowling.โ
โWhat the shelf is strip bowling?โ Max demanded, then she looked at me, eyes sparkling.
Donโt you dare,ย I told her silently.
โNever mind!โ Max grinned. โAvery and I are in.โ
Strip bowling was exactly what it sounded like, in that it involved both bowling and, if you were unsuccessful, stripping.
โThe goal is to knock over theย leastย pins,โ Jameson explained. โBut you have to be careful, because any time your ball ends up in the gutter, you lose an article of clothing.โ
I could feel heat rising in my cheeks. My entire body felt warmโtoo warm. This was a horrible idea.
โThis is a horrible idea,โ Grayson said. For a second or two, he and Jameson engaged in a silent standoff.
โThen why are you here?โ Jameson volleyed back, waltzing over to pick out a dark green bowling ball with the Hawthorne crest on it. โNo one is forcing you to play.โ
Grayson didnโt move, and neither did I.
โSo theoretically,โ Max said, โI want to knock over either zero pins or only oneโwhichever I can manage without putting the ball in the gutter?โ
When Jameson answered, his green eyes locked on to mine. โTheoretically.โ
It became quickly apparent that excelling at strip bowling required precision and a high tolerance for risk. The first time Jameson cut things too close and his ball landed in the gutter, he took off a shoe.
Then another shoe.
A sock.
Another sock.
His shirt.
I tried not to look at the scar that ran the length of his torso, tried not to picture myself touching his chest. Instead, I focused on taking my turn. I was losingโbadly. Iโd even bowled a strike once, so determined was I to stay out of the gutter.
This time I cut things a little closer. When I knocked a single pin down, a breath left my chest. Grayson went next and lost his suit jacket. Max made it all the way down to her polka-dotted bra. Then it was Jamesonโs turn again, and the ball hung to the edge of the lane until the very endโ then toppled into the gutter.
I triedโand failedโto look away as Jamesonโs fingers reached for the waistband of his jeans.
โHelp me, Cheez-Its,โ Max murmured beside me.
Without warning, the door to the room burst inward, and Xander barreled into the bowling alley, then skidded to a halt. He was breathing hard enough to make me wonder how long heโd been running.
โSeriously?โ Xander wheezed. โYouโre playing strip bowling without me? Never mind. Focus! This is me focusing.โ
โFocusing on what?โ I asked.
โI have news,โ Xander blurted out.
โWhat kind of news?โ Max asked. Xander glanced toward her. He
definitely noticed the polka-dotted bra.
โFocus,โ Max reminded him. โWhat kind of news?โ
โIs Rebecca okay?โ Jameson asked, and I remembered Xanderโs conversation with Thea.
โFor some values of okay,โ Xander said. That sentence made sense to no one except Xander, but he plowed on. โThea was right. Rebeccaโs mom is having a rough day. There was vodka involved. She told Rebecca something.โ
โWhat kind of something?โ Jameson took his turn trying to prompt Xander into spilling. Jamesonโs pants were still in place, but the top button had been undone.
Okay, nowย Iย need to focus.
โAvery, do you remember what Rebeccaโs mom said at the fundraiser, about all of her babies dying?โ
โNash said there were miscarriages,โ I said quietly. โBefore Rebecca.โ โThatโs what Bex thought she meant, too,โ Xander said quietly.
โBut it wasnโt?โ I stared at him, having no idea whatsoever where this was going.
โShe was talking about Emily,โ Grayson said, his voice pained. โEmily,โ Xander confirmed. โAnd Toby.โ
I felt the world slow down around me. โWhat are you talking about?โ โToby was a Laughlin.โ Xander swallowed. โRebecca didnโt know. No
one did. Her parents were forty when they had Emily, but twenty-five years earlierโfor the math-minded among us, that would be forty-two years ago
โwhen Rebeccaโs mom was a teenager living in Wayback Cottageโฆโ โShe got pregnant.โ Jameson stated the obvious.
โAnd Mr. and Mrs. Laughlin covered it up?โ Grayson was intent on getting answers. โWhy?โ
Xander raised his shoulders up as high as they would go, then let them fall in the worldโs most elaborate shrug. โRebeccaโs mom wouldnโt explain
โbut she did rant to Bex, at length, about the fact that when one of the Hawthorne daughters got pregnant years later, she didnโt have to hide her pregnancy. She got to keepย herย baby.โ
Skye hadnโt been forced to put Nash up for adoption. I remembered what Rebeccaโs mother had said to Libby at the fundraiser.ย Never trust a Hawthorne. They take everything.
โDid Rebeccaโs mom want to keep her baby?โ I asked, horrified. โDid they make her give him away? And why would they force her to hide the pregnancy?โ
โI donโt know the details,โ Xander said, โbut according to Rebecca, her mother wasnโt even told that the Hawthornes were the ones adopting the baby. She thought that our grandmother really was pregnant with a little boy, and that her own baby was adopted by a stranger.โ
That was horrifying.ย Thatโs why they kept Tobyโs adoption a secret? So she wouldnโt know her baby was right there?
โBut as Toby grew upโฆโ Xander shrugged again, the motion understated this time.
โShe figured it out?โ I imagined giving up a baby and then realizing that a child youโd seen grow up was yours.
I imagined being Toby and discovering this secret.
โRebeccaโs been forbidden from seeing any of us.โ Xander grimaced. โHer mom said that the Hawthorne family takes and takes. She said that we donโt play by any rules and donโt care who we hurt. She blames our family for Tobyโs death.โ
โAnd Emilyโs,โ Grayson added roughly.
โFor all of it.โ Xander sat down, right where he was standing. The room went quiet. Max and Jameson werenโt wearing shirts, I was down one shoe, I knew instinctively that our game of strip bowling was over, and none of it mattered, because all I could think was that Rebeccaโs mom thought Toby was dead.
And so did Mr. and Mrs. Laughlin.