The Hawthorne version of Chutes and Ladders wasnโt a board game. Xander promised he would explain further once I got Eve to agree to play. Focused on that task, I made my way to the Versailles wing. At the top of the east staircase, I found Grayson standing statue-still outside the wing, dressed in a silver three-piece suit, his blond hair wet from the pool.
A poolside cocktail party.ย The memory hit me and wouldnโt let go.ย Grayson is expertly deflecting every financial inquiry that comes my way. I glance toward the pool. Thereโs a toddler balanced precariously on the edge. She leans forward, topples over, goes under, and doesnโt come up. Before I can move or even yell, Grayson is running.
In one liquid motion, he dives into the pool, fully clothed.
โWhereโs Jameson?โ Graysonโs question drew me back to the present.
โProbably somewhere heโs not supposed to be,โ I answered honestly, โmaking very bad decisions and throwing caution to the wind.โ
I didnโt ask Grayson what he was doing outside the Versailles wing.
โI see that Oren put a man on Eve.โ Grayson almost managed to sound like he was commenting on the weather, but a comment never felt like just a comment coming from him.
โItโs Orenโs job to make sure I stay safe.โ I didnโt point out that under other circumstances, Grayson would have
considered that his job, too.
Est unus ex nobis. Nos defendat eius.
โOren shouldnโt be worried aboutย me.โ Eve stepped into the hall. Her hair was dry and fell in gentle waves. โYour security team should be focusing everything on Toby.โ Eve let her vibrant green eyes go from me to Grayson, and I wondered if she recognized the effect she had on him. โWhat do I have to do to convince you that I am not a threat?โ
She was looking at Grayson, but I was the one who answered the question. โHow about a game?โ
โHawthorne Chutes and Ladders,โ Xander boomed, standing in front of a pile of pillows, rope ladders, grappling hooks, suction cups, and nylon rope. โThe rules are fairly simple.โ The list of complicated things that Xander Hawthorne considered to be โfairly simpleโ was lengthy. โHawthorne House has three chutesโentrances to the passageways that involve, letโs say, a drop,โ Xander continued.
I smiled. Iโd already found all three.
โThere are slides built into the walls of your mansion?โ Max snorted. โMother-foxing rich people.โ
Xander did not take offense. โSome chutes are more advantageous than others. If another player beats you to a chute, that chute is frozen for three minutes, so everyone will need one of these.โ Xander picked one up a pillow and gave it a gentle, but somehow menacing, swing. โBattles must be waged.โ
โHawthorne Chutes and Ladders involves pillow fights?โ Max asked in a tone that made me think she was picturing all four Hawthorne brothers swinging pillows at one another. Possibly shirtless.
โPillowย wars,โ Xander corrected. โOnce you successfully claim your chute and make it to the ground floor, you exit
the House, and itโs a race to climb to the roof from the outside.โ
I surveyed the climbing supplies spread out at our feet. โWe get to choose a ladder?โ
โOne does not,โ Xander corrected me austerely, โsimply
chooseย a ladder.โ
Grayson broke the silence heโd adopted the moment Eve had stepped into the hall. โOur grandfather liked to say that every choice worth anything came with a cost.โ
Eve assessed him. โAnd the cost for climbing supplies isโฆโ
Grayson answered her assessing look with one of his own. โA secret.โ
Xander elaborated. โEach player confesses a secret. The person with the best secret gets to pick their climbing supplies first, and so on and so forth. The person with the least impressive secret goes last.โ I was starting to see why Xander had chosen this game. โNow,โ he continued, rubbing his hands together. โWhich brave soul wants to go first?โ
I eyed Eve, but Grayson intervened. โIโll go.โ He fixed his silvery eyes straight ahead. I wasnโt sure what to expect, but it definitely wasnโt him saying, with absolutely no intonation, โI kissed a girl at Harvard.โ
Heโฆ No, I wasnโt going to finish that thought. What Grayson Hawthorne did with his lips was none of my business.
โI got a tattoo.โ Max offered up her own secret with a grin. โItโs very nerdy and in a location I will not disclose. My parents canย neverย find out.โ
โTell me more,โ Xander said, โabout this nerdy tattoo.โ
Grayson arched a brow at his brother, and I tried to think of something that would make Eve feel like she had to open up. โSometimes,โ I said quietly, โI feel like Tobias Hawthorne made a mistake.โ Maybe that wasnโt a secret. Maybe it was obvious. But the next part was harder to say.
โLike he should have chosen someone else.โ Eve stared at me.
โThe old man didnโt make mistakes,โ Grayson said in one of those tones that dared you to argueโand strongly advised against it.
โMy turn.โ Xander raised his hand. โI figured out who my father is.โ
โYouย what?โ Grayson whipped his head toward his brother. Skye Hawthorne had four sons, each with a different father, none of whom sheโd identified. Nash and Grayson had discovered their fathers within the last year. Iโd known that Xander was looking for his.
โI donโt know if he knows about me.โ Xander rushed the words. โI havenโt made contact. Iโm not sure Iโm going to, and by the sacred rules of Chutes and Ladders, none of you canย everย mention this again unless I bring it up first. Eve?โ
With the rest of us still focused on Xander, Eve bent and picked up a grappling hook. As I turned to look at her, she trailed her finger along its edge. โAlmost twenty-one years ago, my mom got drunk and cheated on her husband, and I was the result.โ She didnโt meet a single personโs eyes. โHer husband knew I wasnโt his, but they stayed married. I used to think that if I could be good enoughโsmart enough, sweet enough,ย somethingย enoughโthe man we all pretended was my father would stop blaming me for being born.โ She tossed the grappling hook back down. โThe worst part was my mom blamed me, too.โ
Grayson leaned toward her. I wasnโt even sure he knew he was doing it.
โAs I got older,โ Eve continued, her voice quiet but raw, โI realized that it didnโt matter how perfect I was. I was never going to be good enough because they didnโt want me to beย perfectย orย extraordinary.ย They wanted me to be invisible.โ Whatever emotions Eve was feeling were buried too deep to see. โAnd that is the one thing that I will never be.โ
Silence.
โWhat about your siblings?โ I asked. Up until now, Iโd been so focused on Eveโs resemblance to Emily, on the fact that she was Tobyโs daughter, that I hadnโt thought about her other family membersโor what theyโd done.
โHalf-siblings,โ Eve said with absolutely no intonation. Technically, the Hawthorne brothers were half-siblings.
Technically, Libby and I were. But there was no mistaking Eveโs tone: It meant something different to her.
โEli and Mellie came here under false pretenses,โ I said. โFor you.โ
โEli and Mellie never did a damn thing for me,โ Eve replied, her voice hoarse, her head held high. โChristmas morning when I was five, when they had presents under the tree and I didnโt? The family reunions that everyone got to go to but me? Every time I got grounded for existing just a little too loudly? Every time I had to beg a ride home from something because no one bothered to pick me up?โ She looked down. โIf myย siblingsย came to Hawthorne House, it sure as hell wasnโt for me. I havenโt spoken a word to either of them in two years.โ Shining emerald eyes made their way back to mine. โIs that personal enough for you?โ
I felt a needleโs stab of icy guilt. I remembered what it was like coming to Hawthorne House as an outsider, and I thought suddenly about my mom and the way she would have welcomed Tobyโs daughter with open arms.
About what she would say if she could see me cross- examining her now.
Ballots were passed out. Secrets were ranked. Supplies were chosen.
And then the race was on.