Time slowed, and I couldnโt make sense of what I was seeing. That Ian was no longer whole. That there was so much red everywhereโon the ground, on me. That it was his body falling, and it was his head rolling across the floor. It didnโt make sense.
Neither did the way I saw the Handmaiden lift her hand, her lips parted on a shocked gasp. Or how Prince Malik jerked back a step, the smug impassivity slipping from his handsome face as the wall around his emotions cracked just enough for me to feel the pulse of disbelief echoing through him. I didnโt understand Tawnyโs screams as she backed away, why Emilโs eyes were so wide, or how quickly the blood drained from Kieranโs face, and the silent scream that etched itself onto Vonettaโs features. I didnโt get why Naill had closed his eyes or why Casteel was wrapping his arm around my waist, trying to turn me away, but I couldnโt be moved. I wouldnโt be moved. Agony ripped into my heart and chewed its way through my skull. Images of Ian and I flashed over and over in my mind, every single memory of him rapidly taking form.
โI loved him. I loved him as if he were my own flesh and blood!โ Isbeth screamed, and then she calmed. โLook at what you made me do.โ
Everything stopped as the entirety of the kingdom seemed to close in on me. I lifted my gaze from Ian.
Casteelโs arms tightened around me. โYou vindictive bitch,โ he snarled.
Her dark eyes glistened with tears as she shuddered. โItโs not my fault.โ She turned to me. โI warned you. You didnโt listen.โ
And thenโฆand then everything sped up.
What came out of my throat was a sound Iโd never made before. My chest cracked open, and what poured out of it was pure, untapped rage. There was no thinking. There was no understanding. There would be no ultimatums. All that mattered was that sheโd taken him from meโsheโd
killed him, and I let that ancient instinct take over. It knew what to do with all the rage and pain.
I threw out my arms, breaking Casteelโs hold as the wave of energy pulsed out of me and rolled through the chamber. Casteel skidded back as Kieran turned. Royal Guards and knights rushed forward. They slammed into Tawny, where she stood frozen, her mouth open as she stared at me. I lost sight of her in the crush of men and shields and drawn swords as they circled the Blood Queen. And I saw the flicker of surprise on Isbethโs face just as the covered windows along the walls cracked and shattered. Intense silvery-white light crowded my vision and formed in my mind, a thick webbing that stretched out from me as I took a step forward. I took out the Royal Guards first, shattering their shields and swords, and in the next breath, them.
Casteel unsheathed his swords as guards spilled into the chamber, but there was no one between Isbeth and me. Drawing in the anger and fear throbbing around me, I pulled on my hatred, funneling it through the cords snapping and streaming toward her. I was going to tear apart the walls around her mind like I had wanted to do with Casteelโs father. I wouldnโt stop this time. I would peel apart her mind, one section at a time as I broke every single godsdamn bone in her body. The silvery-white light pulsed over her andโ
Isbeth laughed.
She threw back her head and laughed. I lost control of my will as Casteel whipped around, staring up at the Blood Queen. โDid you not believe what I said, dear child?โ She reached out, flicking a red-painted nail against the thrumming wall of power. The light flared and then collapsed into shimmery dust. โThat has always been one of your greatest weaknesses, Penellaphe. Your doubt in what you see with your own eyes and what you know with your heart. If you had truly believed in what I said, you wouldnโt have dared such a reckless thing. You would know that we are gods, and you donโt fight a god like that.โ
She lifted a hand. Icy-cold fingers gripped my throat, digging into my windpipe. I reached for the handsโhands that werenโt there. A razor-thin bit of air worked its way into my throat as my eyes widened and thenโฆ nothing. I stumbled back, scratching at my neck.
โPoppy!โ Casteel shouted, dropping a sword as he grasped me around the waist. I stared up at him, my mouth moving but without air to give my
words life. His head twisted toward the Blood Queen. โWhat are you doing to her?โ
โTeaching her yet another valuable lessonโโ
Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Lyra shift, heard her clothing rip. It was so fast. Sheโd been mortal one moment, wolven the next, andโฆ
Isbeth turned her head toward her.
Kieran shouted a warning, and then Lyraโs high-pitched yelp and thick, snapping and crunching sounds followed. I tried to turn my head but I couldnโt. The grip on my throat tightened.
โA lesson that will get worse if another single wolven whoโs eyeing me like Iโm dinner takes another step toward me. The same goes for the Atlantians,โ she said, and I wheezed pitifully, damp sweat coating my skin. โI will snap her neck.โ
โStop!โ Casteel yelled. โStand down. Now!โ
I dug at my throat, panic blossoming in my chest. I couldnโt breathe.
Pain streaked down my throat as my nails drew blood.
โLet her go,โ Casteel said, dropping his other sword as he clasped my wrist. โDamn it, let her go!โ
โI donโt think I will. You see, she needs to understand the same lesson you were so resistant to,โ Isbeth said. โShe has no choice. She never has, and I can tell she still believes otherwise. Perhaps she is a perfect fit for you, and sheโll never learn. Your brother has been far more accommodating.โ
My lungs burned as sharp, stabbing pinpricks attacked my hands and armsโmy legs. Black dotted my vision. Pressure clamped down on my skull. Those icy fingers sank into my head, into my mind. Pain sliced through meโthe kind that seized control of my entire body, and thisโoh, gods, this was what I had planned to do to her but hadnโt been quick enough or known how. It felt like she was tearing me apart from the inside, scattering my brain. I jerked, straining against Casteel as I clasped the sides of my head. I twisted, only aware that I breathed because I couldย scream.
โPoppy!โ Casteel gripped my arm as I clutched at my head, tore at my hair as those claws kept digging in. Panic filled his eyes as wet warmth gushed from my nose, from my ears. โNo. No. No.โ He pulled me to his chest as he twisted toward her. โPlease. I beg you. Stop. Please, godsdamn it.ย Stop! Iโll do anything. You want Atlantia? Itโs yoursโโ
โYou are not the true heir,โ she cut him off. โYou cannot give me what I want.โ
โShe canโt give it to you if you kill her,โ he shouted as myย teethย bled. โYou want to control her? You want me, then. Take me. I wonโt fight you. I swear. I wonโt. Just stop.ย Please.โ His voice cracked.
Consciousness was slipping away as I fell further and further into the soul-shredding pain. I could barely hear their words or understand them. I was losing the ability to makeโฆthoughts, but I heard thatโheard Casteel begging, and through the torrential pain, I shook my head. I took those screams roaring through me and all those frayed slivers of thought to form one word, over and over. โNo. No. No,โ I whispered and screamed as all the light went out around me because I would rather be dead. Iโd rather beโ
โYouโre killing her. Please,โ Casteel pleaded. โPlease, stop.โ
โYou. Oh, you have always been my favorite pet. And when she wakes, sheโll know how to keep you alive,โ she replied, her voice fading and draining away until I wasnโt sure that what I heard was real. โMalik. Retrieve your brother.โ
And then there was nothing.
My head throbbed endlessly, and there was a metallic taste in my mouth when I opened my eyes. Fragments of sunlight drifted through the thick branches of an elm.
โPoppy?โ Kieranโs face leaned over mine. My headโฆmy head was in his lap. โYou there?โ
I swallowed, wincing at the pain. โI think so.โ I started to sit up. โWhere are we?โ
โIn the woods just outside of Oak Ambler,โ Hisa answered as Kieran helped me up. I rubbed my aching head as I squinted. Hisaโs features were stark.
I kept looking as my mind slowly cleared away the fog. Delano sat beside Naill, who stood with a hand over his heart. Emil and Vonetta knelt beside theโฆbeside a prone body. โTawny?โ
โSheโs alive.โ Emil looked up quickly, his eyes haunted. โBut sheโs been wounded.โ He stepped aside, and I saw the darkness staining the rose color of her gown around the shoulder. โThe bleeding has stopped, butโฆโ
Vonetta pulled the collar of Tawnyโs gown aside, and I inhaled a shaky breath. Her veins stood out under the rich brown skin, thick and black. โI donโt know what this is.โ
I rose, unsteady. My clothing was stiff with blood. Some was mine, but most of it had belonged to Ian. โI can help her.โ
โI think you should just sit back down for a little bit.โ Kieran was on his feet beside me.
Pressing a hand to my head, I kept looking and keptโฆsearching the patchy memories. The sound of crunching, breaking bones came back to me. โLyra?โ
Kieran shook his head.
My heart started thumping as I slid my hand to my sore throat.ย Isbeth. โWhere is Casteel?โ
Vonetta turned back to Tawny, her shoulders tightโtoo tight. Silence.
A tremor rippled through me. The hum in my chest pushed and expanded, and my heartโmyย soulโtwisted because I already knew. Oh, gods, deep down, I already knew the answer. I cracked as I drew in a too- shallow breath.
I stumbled around in a circle. My eyes locked with Kieranโs as I felt my broken heart crack even more. โNo,โ I whispered, stepping back and then toward Tawny. I needed to help her, but I bent, doubled over. โNo. He didnโt.โ
โPoppy,โ Kieran whispered. โThere was nothing we could do. Casโฆhe handed himself over. We had to leave. Isbeth said Tawny was a giftโa sign of her goodwill. One that she said she hoped you would return.โ
โNo.โ Tears rushed my eyes as I tried to make myself go to Tawny. My stomach dropped as I jerked straight and looked at my left palm. The imprint was still there. I closed my hand and then my eyes, and I saw IanโฆI saw him falling. I heardย herย laughing. I heard him begging. โNo. No.โ I gripped the hair that had come free, pulling until I felt my scalp burn. I could hear Casteel saying: โI was nothing more than this thing without a name.โ That was what sheโd done to him. What she would try to do again. โNo. This wasnโt supposed to happen.โ
โPoppy,โ Delano said, and I hated how he said my name, how softly he spoke it. I hated the sorrow pouring into the air around him, soaking my skin. I shook my head, twisting toward Vonetta.
โWeโll get him back,โ Vonetta promised, but sheโฆshe couldnโt make that promise. โWe will, Poppy.โ
Kieran inched closer, his hands at his sides. โLook at me, Poppy. โ
Still shaking my head, I backed up. I couldnโt catch my breath. I couldnโt breathe again as my chest throbbed with eather. The pain tore through meโthe pain and fear because Ian was gone, and I knew what would happen to Casteel. I knew what they would do to himโI knew whatย sheย would do because I knew what she had already done to him, to Malik, and to Ian.
Ian.
My gaze fell on Tawny, and Iโฆ
Throwing back my head, I screamed as the rage erupted from me. Over and over, I saw Ian falling. Over and over, I heard Casteel shoutingโ begging for her to stop. Lightning ripped through the sky, heating the air. A deafening boom of thunder exploded, rattling the trees and sending birds flying in every direction. Hisa and the guards froze. Delano pressed back, bumping into Naill. They began to back up slowlyโaway from me as my fury charged the air, whipping up a storm. And in the distant parts of my mind, I realized it had always been me. It hadnโt been the gods thatโd caused the storms. It hadnโt been Nyktos. The blood rain had been them, but thisโฆthis wasย meโthe violent stir of energy colliding with the world around me. It had always been meโthis absolute power.
But IโฆI wasnโt me.
I wasnโt the Queen of Flesh and Fire.
My chest rose and fell as my fingers spread wide. I was vengeance and wrath given form, and in the moment, I was exactly what Alastir and the Unseen feared. I was the Bringer of Death and Destruction, and I would tear down the walls they sought to protect themselves with. I would rip apart their homes, scorch their lands, and fill their streets with blood until there was nowhere to run or hide.
And then I would destroy them all.
Streaks of silver-white energy crackled off my skin as I turned back to the edges of the woods, toward the city.
โPoppy. Pleaseโโ Vonetta shouted, leaping in front of me.
I threw out my hand, and she skidded through the tall grass. I stalked forward, the wind whipping overhead. Leaves snapped and fell. Trees bent under the weight of the rage pouring out of me, their limbs slamming into the ground all around me.
โPoppy!โ Vonettaโs scream was caught in the wind. โDonโt do this!โ
I kept walking, the ground trembling under my feet, the image of Ian collapsing, of Lyra being struck down, playing over and over to the sound of Casteel beggingโbeggingย her.
Kieran darted around one of the branches as it slammed down, kicking up dirt. โListen to us,โ he shouted, the force of my anger tearing at his clothing. โYou donโtโโ
I sent him back, his feet slipping out from under him as I screamed. Another pulse of energy reverberated through the forest. The trees in front of me shattered, and I saw the black wall of the smaller Rise surrounding the village outside of Oak Ambler. The guards saw me coming forwardโ coming for them. Several unsheathed swords of bloodstone as others raced through the gate. In my mind, the silvery webbing fell over the wall and seeped into it, finding those cracks Iโd seen in the larger Rise. I latched on to those weak spots and tore the wall apart from the inside. Stone exploded, mowing down the guards.
A cloud of grayish dust blanketed the air as screams of panic rang out, and I smiled. Screams tore through the air, and I felt something gruesome curling the corners of my lips. I stalked forward, silvery-white light crackling between my fingers.
In the thick dust, an immobile shadow took form. It was her. The Handmaiden. She was the only still thing among the smoke, the screams and panicked shouts, her dark hair hanging in a thick braid over one shoulder.
โThese people had nothing to do with what happened back there. They are innocent. Stop her.โ The young woman lifted the bow, completely unfazed by the gathering energy and the streaks of lightning. Not a single muscle trembled as she took unwavering aim at me. โOr I will.โ
I cocked my head, seeing the silvery-white light stretch out toward her
โ
โSorry,โ she said. โThat doesnโt work on me.โ
The energy recoiled from the Revenant. I pushed harder, but the eather
shrank back, crackling and spitting.
โKeep trying.โ The glow of silvery-white light shone brightly across her face. โIn the meantime, do you know what will work on you? Shadowstone, which is what each of my arrows is tipped with. I put one of them through your head, you may get back up, but it wonโt be anytime soon.โ
My chest rose and fell rapidly as I zeroed in on the tip of the arrow.
The fading sunlight reflected off the shiny black surface.
โSo, Iโll repeat myself,โ she continued, walking forward as she raised her voice. โThese people have nothing to do with what was done. They are innocent. Stop this, or I will stop you.โ
Innocent.
Behind her, people scattered into the dirty streets, rushing toward the Rise. They carried nothing but themselves and screaming, red-faced children. They were just mortals caught between the Blood Crown and me, and I could see from where I stood, that the gate to the city was closed.
And I knew that the Ascended who still remained within wouldnโt open it. They wouldโve already done that if any of them had been likeโฆlike Ian. I sucked in a broken breath as I stared at the people crowding the gates of the larger Rise, their fear a pulsing mass.
I was not what Alastir and the Unseen claimed. I was nothing like the deities they feared.
And I sure as hell wasnโt like my mother.
โIโm sorry,โ the Handmaiden said, and my gaze snapped back to her as a jagged tremor rocked me. โI really am. I knew Ian. I liked him. He wasnโt likeโฆa lot of the others.โ
Despite the grief and the rage tearing its way through me, I focused on her, opening my senses.ย Thatย ability still worked as it had before because I knew I was reading her emotions. I could taste themโthe tartness of uncertainty and the bitterness of sorrow.
โBut you need to leave. The Blood Crown has already left here. No one remains who played a role in what happened.โ
โExcept for you,โ I countered.
There was a slight wince. โDid you have a choice when you were the Maiden?โ
I stared at the Handmaiden. She couldโve struck me with one of the shadowstone arrows at any point, and I doubted she wouldโve missed. But she hadnโt. She stood between me and the villagers outside the city, the
poorest among those who called Solis home. Not between me and the Ascended.
My…Coralena had been different, hadnโt she? Sheโd been a Handmaidenโone of those Revenant thingsโbut she had taken Ian and I away from Isbeth. Sheโd loved Leopold. Iย rememberedย how theyโd looked at each other. I thought of the look on this Handmaidenโs face when sheโd been summoned to prove what a Revenant wasโthe wave of hopeless desperation and then the feeling of surrender. Emotions I had been painfully well-acquainted with. And I thought of how Prince Malik had behaved when Isbeth had called her forth. Heโd stepped forward and then seemed to stop himself. I wondered how many times sheโd been used for show and tell, and then I decided I didnโt care.
It took every ounce of my self-control, but I pulled the energy back to me. The static charge of power faded from the air around me. The wind eased, and the trees stopped groaning behind me. โWhere is she taking him?โ I demanded, taking a step forward. The Handmaidenโs eyes narrowed. โIf youโre thinking about firing the arrow, youโd better aim true,โ I warned. โI donโt need eather to fight you. I imagine that regrowing sliced limbs and a head is quite the painful process.โ
Her lips twisted in a brittle, thin smile. โDonโt worry. I will strike true.โ
I returned her grin. โTell me where they are taking him. If you donโt, youโd better kill me when you take me down because I will come back. And I will kill you.โ
โDo you really think that is a threat? That I fear dying? After doing it as many times as I have?โ She laughed, and the sound was as crumbling as the grimace of a smile. โI welcome the final death.โ
โDo you welcome the death of the people you seek to protect right now?โ I challenged, ignoring the spike of empathy I felt for her. โBecause if you donโt fear your end, then maybe youโll fear theirs.โ
Her nostrils flared. โYou all are no better than them.โ
โYouโre wrong. I stopped,โ I said. โWould any of them have stopped?
Would your Queen?โ She said nothing.
โI have no desire to kill innocents. I want to help the people of Solisโ free them from the Blood Crown. That is what we wanted to do,โ I told her. โBut they killed my brother and took the one person who means the world
to me. I will do anything to get him back. No matter how badly it stains my soul.โ
โThen you know how to get him back,โ she snapped. โSubmit to her and take Atlantia in her name.โ
I shook my head.
โSo, you wonโt do anything for him, then?โ
โBecause once she has what she wants, she will kill him,โ I said. โShe will kill me.โ
โThen I guess youโre screwed.โ
โNo. Because I wonโt let either of those two things happen,โ I said. โIโm going to give her what she wants, but not in the way she thinks.โ
Curiosity flickered through the Handmaiden, but then her attention shifted just the slightest to my shoulder.
โPoppy,โ Kieran called quietly as several archers on the Rise scrambled into their nests.
Her chest rose with a shallow breath. โSheโll take him to the capital. I donโt know where. No one knows where she keeps herโฆpets.โ
A shiver of rage brushed my skin, stroking the throbbing in my chest, and her lip curled in disgust. It was brief. I wasnโt sure that she was even aware of it, but I saw it.
โBut it doesnโt matter,โ she continued. โSheโll have every Revenant on hand guarding him. Sheโll haveย himย watching over your King,โ she told me, and I knew that she spoke of the Prince. โYou wonโt get near him.โ She lowered her bow, her shoulders settling. โUnless you can bring the fire of the gods with you, none of you stands a chance.โ
A chill swept through me as I stared at her. Fire of the gods? Her gaze met mine as she took a step back. โIโm sure we will meet again,โ she said.
โWe will.โ
I sat in the wooden chair of the hunting cabin Casteel had brought me to, after heโd saved my life and risked so much in the process, and stared at the bed.
Tawny lay there, her face too pale, her breathing too shallow. Iโd tried to heal her. Iโd tried once when I went back to the woods. My gift had flared to life then, and the wound had closed, but she didnโt wake. I tried again when we stopped halfway here, after weโd mounted the horses that Hisa had brought. I placed my hands on her too-warm skin as soon as we arrived at the cabin, but she didnโt wake, and those dark veins had spread up her throat.
Weโd traveled straight through the Wastelands and had reached the hunting cabin as night descended. We had to stop. Everyone was tired, and Tawnyโฆ I didnโt know what was wrong with her or what had pierced her flesh to cause thisโfor my gift to not do much beyond closing her skin.
The arrow the Handmaiden had held resurfaced. It had been fashioned from shadowstone. The same weapon my mother had had the night the Craven came to the inn. The same kind of weapon the deities had been buried with and the skeleton soldiers had held. I couldnโt remember seeing what kind of weapons the guards had. IโdโฆIโd obliterated the ones who stood in front of me, but the Handmaiden had said it would put me down for a while. I glanced at Tawny. Could it have been shadowstone? Was that why my gifts had only worked to a certain point?
My gaze lowered to my hand. I turned it palm up and, in the glow of the candlelight, saw the marriage imprint shimmer. I closed my hand, squeezing my eyes shut against the burn.
I hadnโt cried.
I wanted to. I wanted to cry for Ian. I wanted to cry for Lyra. I wanted to cry for Tawny because I feared sheโd never open her eyes again. I wanted to cry for Casteel because I knew what he faced, even if I could imagine what he must be thinking or feeling to know that his brother had not only betrayed him but would also become one of his prison keepers.
Anger had grown with each mile we got closer to Atlantia. If we had known the truth about who the Queen really was, we couldโve better prepared. We wouldโve known it was impossible for her to be an Ascended. We wouldโve known that anything was possible. Instead, weโd gone into the meeting hobbled by lies. No part of me believed for even one second that Eloana hadnโt known the truth. Possibly even Valyn had known. The knowledge theyโd withheld couldโve changed everything.
Because it already had.
A soft knock drew me from my thoughts. I rose and stiffly walked to the door.
Kieran stood there. โCanโt sleep. None of us can.โ Beyond him, I saw several shapes sitting around a small fire. He looked over my shoulder. โHow is she?โ
โStill asleep.โ
โI know you havenโt slept.โ
I shook my head as I stepped out into the cool night air, closing the door behind me. I glanced over at the bent and bowed trees as I walked with Kieran over to where the others sat.
Vonetta glanced up as I sat beside her. She offered me a flask, but I shook my head. Iโd apologized to her and to Kieran, but I felt like I needed to do it again. I opened my mouth.
โDonโt,โ she cut me off. โI know what youโre going to say. Itโs not necessary. I understand. We all understand.โ
There were several murmurs of agreement from around the fire. My gaze briefly met Hisaโs and then Delanoโs and finally Naillโs. โHeโs still alive,โ I said roughly. โShe wonโt kill him. Not when she thinks she can use him to control meโcontrol Atlantia.โ
They nodded, but I sensed relief. They had needed to hear that. Iโd needed to say that. โDoes anyone know anything about shadowstone? That was what the Handmaiden had.โ
โI heard what she said,โ Kieran said.
โDo you think that could be whatโs causing Tawnyโs injuries?โ I asked. โI donโt know.โ Hisa dragged a hand over her head. โSheโs mortal. Iโve never seen a mortal wounded by shadowstone before. A lot of Healers in
Evaemon and some of the older Elders may have seen something like this.โ I thought of Willa and then her diary, and the next breath I tookย hurt. โWhat is the plan?โ Emil asked as Vonetta handed him the flask. He
took a drink.
We hadnโt really spoken on the ride away from Oak Ambler. Not about anything, but I had done a lot of thinkingโabout what Isbeth had said, what even the Duchess had claimed in Spessaโs End, and what the Handmaiden had told me.
Even though Iโd refused Isbeth, she believed that everything was falling into place. She had the Prince and now the King of Atlantia. She had found a way to control me, and in her mind, she therefore controlled
Atlantia. Just like Duchess Teerman had claimed, I would succeed where the Queen had failed.
But they were wrong.
I looked down at my handsโat the marriage imprint.ย You always had the power in you. That was something I had also thought about. I now knew where Iโd first heard it. The silvery-blonde Iโd seen when I had been so close to dying. That is what she had said to me.
You always had the power in you.
And it was what Nyktos had said. A part of me wondered if the woman Iโd seen was his Consort. That, in her sleep, sheโd reached out to me, to either warn or help me. It would make sense that she would.
After all, I was her granddaughter, if she was who I believed.
My fingers curled into my palms. The center of my chest hummed with powerโthe eather of the King of Gods. The kind that shouldโve been powerful enough to destroy whatever the hell Isbeth believed she was. But I hadnโt been prepared. I hadnโt fought like a god because I did not believe I was one.
But Casteel had, hadnโt he? Did he ever really believe I was a deity? I exhaled roughly. โShe was right.โ
Vonetta looked over at me. โWho?โ โThe Queen. I am a god,โ I stated.
Her brows rose as she glanced over at Emil and Naill. โUmโโ
โNo. Wait.โ Kieran rose, understanding flickering through him. โIf what she claimed is true and Malec is one of Nyktos and his Consortโs sons
โand youโre their grandchildโyou are a god,โ he reiterated what Iโd just been thinking.
Delano nodded slowly. โIt doesnโt matter what in the hell Ileanaโ Isbethโis. You are the grandchild of Nyktosโof a Primal God.ย Thatย is why your bloodline is so potent. You are a god, not a deity.โ
โShit,โ Emil muttered, taking another drink before Vonetta snatched the flask from him.
โThatโs what Nyktos meant,โ I said, swallowing. โI never needed his permission.โ
โFor what?โ Naill asked.
โTo use his guards,โ I said, knowing thatโs what the Handmaiden had meant by the fire of the gods. โTo summon the draken.โ