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Chapter no 1 – I Get Flushed

The Chalice of the Gods

Look, I didnโ€™t want to be a high school senior. I was hoping my dad could write me a note:โ€Œ

Dear Whoever,

Please excuse Percy Jackson from school forever and just give him the diploma.

Thanks, Poseidon

I figured Iโ€™d earned that much after battling gods and monsters since I was twelve years old. Iโ€™d saved the world . . . three times? Four? Iโ€™ve lost count. You donโ€™t need the details. Iโ€™m not sure I even remember them at this point.

Maybe youโ€™re thinking,ย But wow! Youโ€™re the son of a Greek god!

That must be amazing!

 

 

 

Honest truth? Most of the time, being a demigod blows chunks.

Anybody who tells you different is trying to recruit you for a quest.

So there I was, stumbling down the hallway on my first morning of classes at a new high schoolโ€”againโ€”after losing my entire junior year because of magical amnesia (donโ€™t ask). My textbooks were spilling out of my arms, and I had no idea where to find my third-period English class. Math and biology had already melted my brain. I wasnโ€™t sure how I was going to make it to the end of the day.

Then a voice crackled over the loudspeaker:ย โ€œPercy Jackson, please report to the counselorโ€™s office.โ€

At least none of the other students knew me yet. Nobody looked at me and laughed. I just turned, all casual-like, and meandered back toward the administration wing.

Alternative High is housed in a former elementary school in Queens. That means kiddie-size desks and no lockers, so you have to carry all your stuff from class to class. Down every hall, I could find cheery reminders of the schoolโ€™s former childhoodโ€”smudges of finger paint on the walls, unicorn stickers peeling off the fire extinguishers, the occasional ghostly whiff of fruit juice and graham crackers.

AHS takes anybody who needs to finish their high school career. It doesnโ€™t matter if you are coming back from juvie, or have severe learning differences, or happen to be a demigod with really bad luck. It is also the only school in the New York area that would admit me for my senior year and help me make up all the course credit Iโ€™d lost as a junior.

On the bright side, it has a swim team and an Olympic-size pool (no idea why), so my stepdad, Paul Blofis, thought it might be a good fit for me. I promised him Iโ€™d try.

Iโ€™d also promised my girlfriend, Annabeth. The plan was that Iโ€™d graduate on time so we could go to college together. I didnโ€™t want to disappoint her. The idea of her going off to California without me kept me up at night. . . .

I found the counselorโ€™s office in what mustโ€™ve once been the school infirmary. I deduced that from a painting on the wall of a sad purple frog with a thermometer in its mouth.

โ€œMr. Jackson! Come in!โ€

The guidance counselor came around her desk, ready to shake my hand.

Then she realized I had six thousand pounds of textbooks in my arms. โ€œOh, just put those down anywhere,โ€ she said. โ€œPlease, have a seat!โ€

She gestured to a blue plastic chair about a foot too low for me. Sitting in it, I was eye level with the jar of Jolly Ranchers on her desk.

โ€œSo!โ€ The counselor beamed at me from her comfy-looking, adult-size chair. Her bottle-thick glasses made her eyes swim. Her gray hair was curled into scalloped rows that reminded me of an oyster bed. โ€œHow are you settling in?โ€

โ€œThe chairโ€™s a little short.โ€ โ€œI mean at school.โ€

 

 

โ€œWell, Iโ€™ve only had two classesโ€”โ€

โ€œHave you started on your college applications?โ€ โ€œI just got here.โ€

โ€œExactly! Weโ€™re already behind!โ€

I glanced at the purple frog, who looked as miserable as I felt. โ€œLook, Ms.โ€”โ€

โ€œCall me Eudora,โ€ she said cheerfully. โ€œNow, letโ€™s see what brochures we have.โ€

She rummaged through her desk. โ€œPoly Tech. BU. NYU. ASU. FU. No, no, no.โ€

I wanted to stop her. My temples were throbbing. My ADHD was pinging around under my skin like billiard balls. I couldnโ€™t think about college today.

โ€œMaโ€™am, I appreciate your help,โ€ I said. โ€œBut, really, Iโ€™ve kinda already got a plan. If I can just get through this yearโ€”โ€

โ€œYes, New Rome University,โ€ she said, still digging through her desk drawer. โ€œBut the mortal counselor doesnโ€™t seem to have a brochure.โ€

My ears popped. I tasted salt water in the back of my throat. โ€œThe mortal counselor?โ€

My hand drifted toward the pocket of my jeans, where I kept my favorite weapon: a deadly ballpoint pen. This wouldnโ€™t have been the first time Iโ€™d had to defend myself from an attack at school. Youโ€™d be amazed how many teachers, administrators, and other school staff are monsters in disguise. Or maybe youย wouldnโ€™tย be amazed.

โ€œWho are you?โ€ I asked.

She sat up and smiled. โ€œI told you. Iโ€™m Eudora.โ€

I studied her more closely. Her curled hairย wasย in fact a bed of oysters.

Her dress shimmered like a jellyfish membrane.

 

 

Itโ€™s weird how the Mist works. Even for demigods, who see supernatural stuff all the time, you have to concentrate to pierce the barrier between the human world and the godly one. Otherwise, the Mist just kind of plasters over what you see, making ogres look like pedestrians or a giant drakon look like the N train. (And believe me, itโ€™s embarrassing trying to board a drakon when one rampages into the Astoria Boulevard station.)

โ€œWhat did you do with the regular counselor?โ€ I asked.

Eudora waved her hand dismissively. โ€œOh, donโ€™t worry about her. She couldnโ€™t help you with New Rome. Thatโ€™s whyย Iโ€™mย here!โ€

Something about her tone made me feel . . . not reassured, exactly, but at least not personally threatened. Maybe she only ate other guidance counselors.

Her presence felt familiar, tooโ€”the salty tingle in my nostrils, the pressure in my ears as if I were a thousand feet underwater. I realized Iโ€™d encountered someone like her before, when I was twelve years old, at the bottom of the Mississippi River.

โ€œYouโ€™re a sea spirit,โ€ I said. โ€œA Nereid.โ€

Eudora chuckled. โ€œYes, of course, Percy. Did you think I was a dryad?โ€ โ€œSo . . . my father sent you?โ€

She raised an eyebrow, as if she was starting to worry I might be a bit slow on the uptake. Weirdly, I get that look a lot.

โ€œYes, dear. Poseidon. Your father? My boss? Now, Iโ€™m sorry I canโ€™t find a brochure, but I know youโ€™ll need all the usual human requirements for New Rome University: test scores, official transcripts, and an up-to-date psychoeducational evaluation. Those arenโ€™t a problem.โ€

โ€œThey arenโ€™t?โ€ After all Iโ€™d been through, it mightโ€™ve been too early to judge on that last one.

โ€œBut youโ€™ll also need a few, ah, special entry requirements.โ€

The taste of salt water got sharper in my mouth. โ€œWhat special requirements?โ€

โ€œHas anyone talked to you about divine recommendation letters?โ€ She looked like she really wanted the answer to be yes.

โ€œNo,โ€ I said.

She fiddled with her jar of Jolly Ranchers. โ€œI see. Well. Youโ€™ll need three letters. From three different gods. But Iโ€™m sure for a demigod of your talents

โ€”โ€

 

 

โ€œWhat?โ€

Eudora flinched. โ€œOr we could look at some backup schools. Ho-Ho-Kus Community College is very nice!โ€

โ€œAre youย kiddingย me?โ€

The Nereidโ€™s face started to glisten. Rivulets of salt water trickled from her oyster-bed hair.

I felt bad about getting angry. This wasnโ€™t her fault. I knew she was only trying to help me because my dad had ordered her to. Still, it wasnโ€™t the kind of news I wanted to deal with on a Monday morning. Or ever.

I steadied my breathing. โ€œSorry. Itโ€™s just . . . Iย needย to get into New Rome. Iโ€™ve done a lot of stuff for the gods over the years. Canโ€™t I just, like, e-mail them a recommendation form . . . ?โ€

Eudoraโ€™s eyebrows knotted. Her dress was now sloughing off sheets of seawater. A pool of it spread across the green-tile floor, seeping ever closer to my textbooks.

I sighed. โ€œUgh. I have to doย newย quests, donโ€™t I?โ€

โ€œWell, dear, the college admissions process is always challenging, but Iโ€™m here to helpโ€”โ€

โ€œHow about this?โ€ I said. โ€œIfย my fatherย really wants to help, maybe he should explain this to me himself, rather than sending you here to break the bad news.โ€

โ€œOh. Well, that would be, umโ€”โ€ โ€œOut of character,โ€ I agreed.

Something buzzed in Eudoraโ€™s hairdo (shell-do?), making her jump. I wondered if maybe sheโ€™d gotten an electric eel stuck in her oyster bed, but then she plucked out one of the shells. โ€œExcuse me. I have to take this.โ€

She put the shell to her ear. โ€œHello? . . . Oh, yes, sir! I . . . Yes, I understand. Of course. Right away.โ€

She set the shell on the desk and stared at it, as if afraid it might ring again.

โ€œDad?โ€ I guessed.

 

 

She tried for a smile. The saltwater lake was still spreading across the office floor, soaking my textbooks, seeping through my shoes.

โ€œHe thinks you might be right,โ€ Eudora said. โ€œHeโ€™ll explain this to you in person.โ€

She saidย in personย the way most teachers sayย in detention.

I tried to act cool, like I had won an argument, but my dad and I hadnโ€™t talked in . . . a while. He usually only brought me to his underwater palace when a war was about to start. I was hoping maybe heโ€™d give me a week or so to settle in at school before he summoned me.

โ€œGreat. So . . . I can go back to class?โ€ โ€œOh, no, dear. He meansย now.โ€

Around my feet, the water swirled into a whirlpool. The tiles began to crack and dissolve.

โ€œBut donโ€™t worry,โ€ Eudora promised. โ€œWeโ€™ll meet again!โ€

The floor dropped out from under my chair, and I plunged into a churning maelstrom with a thunderousย FLUSH!

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