Joe
THERE IS PEACE THAT COMES THIS CLOSE TO THE END. I can’t open my eyes, but
I can feel Leah’s hand in mine, and I want this to be the last thing I remember, the touch of my daughter. I know they’re here, in this room. Even when death is this near, I’m not entirely convinced of heaven or my place in it. But I can feel Dad and Charlie standing in the corner, waiting on me. I don’t feel pain anymore, and my body feels light, like a child’s.
I don’t want visions of my life to unreel; I want to stay in this moment with all the people I love, sisters and brothers, ghosts, and a daughter I never deserved, all in one place, with me. I think it might sound strange for anyone else, but this just might be the happiest I’ve been since the day the crow stole my bread in a berry field in Maine.