Seven whole weeks had passed since Gerardโs ladder had taken its maiden voyage into my tree, and we were still going strong. Better than strong. We were titanium.
Sure, our mothers had turned into a pair of tag-teaming ninjas hell-bent on foiling any and all plans of teenage debauchery, but as the saying goes, where thereโs a will, thereโs a willy, and Gerard and I had found ways of being together.
The best part of it all? Mother nature had visited me on time as per our arranged schedule for the past four years.
Every twenty-eight days for five days, she liked to stop by to let me know my eggs were capable of hatching.
The first time she visited after we were intimate was the most welcome visit of all because it reassured me that Gerardโs pierced ladder hadnโt pierced any holes in our protection. The second time was a glorious reassurance that I could have my cake and eat it, too. Not that I didnโt want to have babies with Gerard. I did. I just wanted those babies to arrive many years into the future.
Today was Wednesday, and the last day of our dress fittings before the winter ball on Friday night.
While today was technically a school day, the light dusting of snow outside meant that our school had sent out a message to parents to let them know that due to adverse road conditions, attendance was optional.
Of course, the moment we heard the good news, Gerard and I had opted to spend our snow day at the manor, building snowmen andย throwing snowballs around with our besties.
Iย lovedย when it snowed, even more when it snowed in December. It filled me with all the warm, festive fuzzies, and knowing that Christmas break was almost upon us, and I was about to spend it as Gerardโsย girlfriend, well, that just sent my good mood soaring to new heights.
โHe never asks for anything when weโre being intimate,โ I told my bestie, as we tried on our dresses for the final time. โIs that normal?โ
โI donโt know,โ Shannon replied, turning around to catch a glance of the back of her dress in the full-length mirror. We were in Edel Kavanaghโs coveted office/dressing room, surrounded by designer labels, and waiting for her to return with a measuring tape. โIโm not the best person to ask. Lizzie would probably have way better advice than me, Claire.โ
โLizzie would rather scalp herself bald and offer her hair as a sacrifice to the devil before she helped me with my relationship.โ
Since Gerard and I had gone public with our relationship, my friendship with Lizzie had cooled to the stage where it felt like there was an iceberg between us. She barely spoke to me at school anymore, she no longer sat with me in class, we rarely hung out, and if Shannon wasnโt there, she didnโt even acknowledge my presence.
I would be a liar if I said it didnโt hurt, but I would be an even bigger one if I said Gerard wasnโt worth it. Because heย was. He so epically was.
โWhen youโre with Johnny, does he have anything in particular that he enjoys you doing to him?โ
โClaire!โ
โWhat?โ I huffed. โYouโre my best friend, and best friends are supposed to dole out wisdom to each other.โ
โWhat if Edel hears?โ
โBut she wonโt, because sheโs still not back with her tape, so spill your beans, Lynch.โ
โWell.โ Shannon seemed to think about it for a long time before saying, โHeโs big into neck kisses.โ
โNeck kisses?โ
โI think Claire was hoping for something that pertained to his package, Shan,โ Aoife laughed, appearing from behind the curtain of the changing area in her dress. โWoo, I am rocking this milf look,โ she said, gazing at herself approvingly in the mirror, while adjusting her giant boobs. โI know ladies are supposed to be modest and all that jazz, but honestly, girls, if I was a cake, Iโd eat myself.โ Cackling to herself, she added, โAnd, letโs be honest, I amย noย lady.โ
โAsk Aoife,โ Shannon blurted, pointing at her sister-in-law. โBut just donโt do it while Iโm in the room, okay? Because I really donโt need to know the ins and outs of my brotherโs sex life.โ
โYour brother puts theย sexย in life, period,โ Aoife tossed over her shoulder. โMy man is gifted, girls. He puts the D in BD energy.โ
I stared blankly. โBD?โ
โBig dick,โ Aoife explained, and then, waggling her brows, she used her hands to illustrate in detail what I presumed was the length of her boyfriendโs willy, which sort of resembled that of a giant cucumber and mildly terrified me.
โOh my God.โ My eyes widened in horror. โHe could touch your appendix with that thing.โ
โI know!โ Aoife nodded gleefully, looking like the cat that caught the cream. โIโm aย luckyย girl.โ
โAnd now Iโm going to go cry,โ Shannon groaned, hurrying off with her hands over her ears.
โCome to momma, pretty girl,โ Aoife coaxed, gesturing for me to come closer. โLet me tell you how to seduce a man.โ
Armed with a world of general knowledge of the male appendage, courtesy of Aoife Molloy, and the dress of my dreams courtesy of Edel Kavanagh, I practically glided on air through the doors of Tommen the following morning.
It was still snowing outside, but it wasnโt nearly heavy enough to garner another optional snow day. Not that I minded either way. I wasย happy at school or at home. Besides, we only had today and tomorrow left and then we were free for two whole weeks.
โMorning, family,โ I called out in a lyrical voice when I pirouetted into the sixth-year common room, stopping underneath a rogue piece of hanging mistletoe to smack a loud kiss to Patrickโs cheek.
โMorning,โ everyone chorused back at me.
He laughed, wiping my lip-gloss from his cheek. โWhat was that for, Baby Biggs?โ
โCheck where youโre standing, pretty boy.โ
As soon as Patrick looked up and noticed the mistletoe, he took three safe steps to the left โ and out of danger. โThanks for the heads-up.โ Pulling on the sleeve of his jumper, he shifted around in discomfort. โThose two girls from your year have been following me around all week with the stuff.โ
โHelen and Shelley?โ I laughed. โAw, see, Pa, I tried to warn you about the trail of girls following after you.โ
โHm,โ was all he said in response.
โHowโs my second favorite mam and dad?โ I cooed when I reached Joey and Aoife who were eating toast in the kitchen area. โI would say my first, but clearly that title goes to my own mam and dad.โ
โClearly,โ Joey drawled, looking like he didnโt quite know what to make of my Christmas cheer. โYou know, youโd make a killing as one of Santaโs elves,โ he surprised me by saying. โOr kidsโ birthday parties.โ
โShe really would, right?โ Aoife laughed. โSlap a princess costume on her, give her some face paints for the kids, and she could easily make two hundred euro an appearance.โ
โI could?โ Excitement bubbled up inside of me at the thought and I bounced from foot to foot. โReally?โ
โOh, yeah.โ Nodding, Joey turned his attention back to his girlfriend. โShe would make a killing.โ
โOh my God.โ My eyes widened. โIโm going to be rich!โ
โYouโre already rich,โ they said in unison before Aoife turned herย attention to the quiet redhead sitting alone on the couch. โHey, pretty girl! Did you get your dress sorted for the ball tomorrow night?โ
Katieโs face flamed with heat from the compliment. โUh, yeah, eventually.โ
โYeah?โ Interest piqued, Aoife strolled over to the couches and sank down beside Katie. โIs it the green one you showed me in the picture?โ
The door flew open then and Gerard stalked in, grumbling about showoffs and passports, followed by a delighted-looking Shannon, who had a pair of mouse ears perched on her head. โIโm going to France!โ she practically screamed, and then she barreled towards me, waving around a pair of tickets. โFor three nights, Claire!โ
โOmigod,โ I screamed, joining her on the bouncing, as I studied the tickets in her hands. โWhoa, youโre not just going to France, Shan,โ I squealed with excitement. โYouโre going to Paris!โ
โThatโs still France,โ Lizzie said in a lifeless tone, shoving past me on her way to the kitchen area. โRead a fucking map sometime.โ
Choosing to ignore her, I smiled brighter for Shannonโs sake, and focused my attention on the mouse ears perched on her head. โThat must mean youโre going to the happiest place on earth?โ
Beaming with delight, Shannon nodded eagerly. โIโve never been on an airplane before.โ
โDonโt get the hump, Gibs,โ Johnny said when he strode into the room a moment later. โItโs my girlfriendโs Christmas present, lad. I couldnโt exactly bring you along, could I?โ
โAh, I donโt fucking see why not?โ Gerard huffed, moving to my side. โHeads up, Claire-Bear, these two inconsiderate bastards are jetting off toย Oui, Parisย without us.โ Huffing out a breath, he swiped Shannonโs mouse ears and perched them on top of his head before turning back to me. โSee this? Take a good look, baby, because unfortunately, this is the closest youโre going to get toย Mickeyย this Christmas, because unlike mister limitless cashflow over thereโโ he paused to jab a thumb in Johnnyโs direction before continuing โโyour stud muffin can only afford to take you to see Santa.โ
โAww!โ Swooning, I wrapped my arms around his neck and pressed a kiss to his cheek. โYouโre taking me to see Santa?โ
โHo, ho, ho, Claire-Bear.โ Waggling his brows, Gerard hooked an arm around my waist and pulled me closer. โAnd if youโre really good, then maybe we can โฆ โ
โOh my God!โ Releasing a furious scream, Lizzie threw the glass she was holding, causing it to smash to pieces the moment it connected with the wall. โCan you both shut the fuck up!โ
You could have heard a pin drop.
The entire room went deathly quiet.
โGibs,โ Johnny said, offering Gerard a subtle nod when he opened his mouth to speak. โNot worth it, lad.โ
โI know that,โ Gerard ground out. โSheโs the one who wonโt make peace.โ
โPeace?โ Lizzie choked out, voice thick with emotion. โYou honestly expect me to makeย peaceย with the brother of my sisterโs rapist?โ She sneered. โThe same brother with blood on his hands?โ Narrowing her eyes, she spat, โYou supported him. You backed him up when I was supposed to be your friend. I would rather slit my wrists than ever makeย peaceย with you!โ
โI didnโt back him up,โ Gerard roared, losing his cool. โBelieve me when I tell you there is no one on this planet who despises that bastard more than me.โ
โKeep telling yourself that, Thor. See if itโll help with your guilty conscience.โ
โIโm not listening to this.โ
โBecause youโre guilty.โ
โAnd youโre wrong!โ
โIโm right and you know it.โ
โFuck you, Liz.โ
โFuck you right back. I donโt care if there wasnโt enough evidence for the DPP to make a case against him. I know the truth. I read it with my own eyes. So, donโt you dare stand here and lie to my face. Unlike you,ย I have the ability to read a fucking letter, asshole.โ
Whoa.
โHey!โ Johnny snapped. โDonโt fucking go there.โ
โOh, thatโs right, Captain Fantastic,โ she choked out. โProtect your lapdog.โ
โJohnny, wait. Please donโt. Sheโs hurting so bad right now,โ Shannon said, trying to plead her case, but Johnny shook his head.
โShan, I love you, baby, but Iโm not the audience for her narrative.โ
And that was that.
Our leader had taken sides.
The line was drawn in the sand and after months of trying to keep the peace and appease his girlfriend, Johnny Kavanagh had taken his rightful place beside his teammate.
โYou need to stop talking,โ Johnny warned, taking a defensive stance in front of Gerard. โAnd back off.โ
โYou started this, not him,โ I threw out there before Lizzie could change the narrative. โYou shouted, you threw the cup, andย youย brought it up.โ
โWhy are you always siding with him?โ she screamed. โIโm supposed to be one of your best friends.โ
โAnd Iโm supposed to be one of yours,โ I shouted back at her. โBut youโve spent the past two months dictating how I should live, and then talking down to me like a child for making decisions that donโt fit your perfect narrative.โ
โYou know what happened.โ
โI know it didnโt have anything to do with Gerard.โ
โMy sister is dead!โ
โSo is Gerardโs sister!โ
โYeah, but see hereโs the difference, Claire. I didnโt drown his sister, but his brother sure as hell drowned mine!โ
โGuys, can we not?โ Shannon tried to interject but it was too late to be brought down. The pot had come to the boil and confessions were spilling over the rim.
โNo,โ Lizzie cried hoarsely. โBecause Iโm never going to be okay with you going out with him.โ
โAnd Iโm never going to start asking for yourย permission!โ
Looking like a wild, cornered animal, Lizzie shook her head and bolted for the door. โYou can all go to hell.โ
โWhat the โฆ โ Hugh muttered, looking around then down at the crying girl pressed against him. โWhat happened?โ
โAsk the rapist-protector!โ
โGibs?โ Hugh asked, turning around. โWhat happened?โ
โYou know what, Liz?โ Gerard replied calmly. โOne of these days, youโre going to have to make peace with the fact that the only person responsible for your sisterโs death is yourย sister.โ
The minute he said it, Lizzie snapped. She lunged for him, and thatโs when it all went to hell.
Moving like lightning, Hugh intercepted her before she could reach Gerard.
โLet me the fuck go,โ she screamed, banging and hitting at his chest with the fury of a thousand demons. โI donโt need you to save me!โ
Hugh didnโt let go.
Ignoring her slaps, he wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her close, using his free hand to cradle her face to his chest.
Eventually, she grew limp against him, hands reaching up to clutch the fabric of his school shirt, as he talked heatedly to the boys.
โGet her out of here, Hugh,โ Johnny warned, as he kept a protective stance in front of his friend, looking less in control of his emotions than Iโd ever seen before. โGo now, lad.โ
Meanwhile, Katie stood quietly looking on, with an unreadable expression on her face.
Keeping her tucked up against his chest, Hugh continued to speak to his friends, while he doled out instructions and caught a set of flying car keys midair.
He flicked his gaze to his girlfriend, who simply nodded before turning away from the drama and packing her lunchbox into her schoolbag.
Shielding her face from the view of dozens of our peers when he opened the door to the main hallway, Hugh walked Lizzie in one direction, while Johnny steered Gerard in the other. Keeping a supportive hand on his shoulder, he walked his best friend away from the carnage.
โShe needs a doctor,โ Pierce, who was standing in the hall, came into the fray and declared. โThat girl is seriously unwell.โ
โDonโt fucking say it like that,โ Patrick snapped back. โJesus!โ
โHurt peopleย hurtย people,โ Shannon offered. โIโm not excusing it, but please donโt vilify her for not using healthy ways to cope with her trauma.โ
โShannon, we all have trauma,โ Katie replied. โNot everyone projects it on other people.โ
โI think itโs because there were so many unsaid conversations,โ Patrick offered, shifting in his seat. โOne day she was here and the next sheโโ
โWasnโt.โ
โExactly.โ
โNothing was cleared up,โ he added.
โExactly,โ Shannon agreed, nodding eagerly. โSo, for Lizzie, sheโs still living that day on repeat.โ
โKind of like the filmย Groundhog Day.โ
โYes,โ she beamed at Patrick. โJust likeย Groundhog Day.โ She turned to the rest of us. โThe years are passing by for the rest of us, but sheโs stuck in that moment.โ Shrugging, she added, โTime canโt heal when it doesnโt pass by.โ