APRIL 12TH 2004 JOEY
I WAS in over my head.
What had started with a kiss had developed into several months’ worth of kisses, with a whole heap of heavy petting thrown into the mix.
Basically, what Molloy and I had going on was casual sex – minus the sex and multiply the feelings.
Yeah, I’d fucked around and caught feelings. I was a real genius.
I never wanted to be in a relationship.
I never wanted another person to depend on me for something that I couldn’t give, and that’s where it got fuzzy, because, somehow, Molloy had become exactly that.
Hearing everyone at school whisper about how we wouldn’t last longer than a week, or how my head would turn, only made me more determined to stick with the girl – to stand over my decision to be with her.
Their lack of faith in me only strengthened my determination to not
fuck this up, whatever the hell this was.
I’d been with girls before Molloy, but I was no hardcore fuck boy like I knew the girls at school made me out to be.
Like I knew she thought I was.
It wasn’t like I’d fucked my way through the entire female population at our school.
Only a handful.
And besides, that wasn’t what was happening between us.
When we were together, it wasn’t because I was out of my mind and trying to float away in the moment.
Being with her made me want to keep a clear head, because I wanted to remember her.
I wanted to be in the moment with her, and not just float through it. Because she was Molloy.
My friend.
Maybe even my best friend.
“Are you going to do something about that?” Podge asked, dragging me back to the present, as he waved a spoon in front of us, gesturing to where Molloy looked to be in a heated discussion with Ricey.
“I’m not her keeper, lad,” I replied, leaning back in my chair, as I studied the jam-packed canteen. Molloy was standing in line for the tuck shop, with Ricey breathing down her neck. “She can handle herself.”
“You’re a better man than him,” Podge said. “Because if the shoe was on the other foot, and you were trying your arm with her like that, he would flip.”
“That was his mistake,” I said, eyes glued to her fucking peachy her ass, barely concealed by her scrap of a skirt. “He thought that he could put her in a cage, and slap a label on top saying look, don’t touch.” I shook my head. “That girl is her own person, lad. Believe me. Nobody’s going to cage her.”
“Except for you,” he chuckled.
“No, lad,” I corrected, feeling my heart roar to life when she smiled across the room at me. “Especially not me.”
