“GOOD MORNING, SLEEPY HEAD.” Nico’s melodic voice hits me like a shot of caffeine.
“Go away, Nico.” I yank my duvet overhead, shutting him out like a set of window shades. “It’s too early for all your energy right now.” I peek over the covers. He’s standing in my doorway, his signature grin stretching wider than usual. He is far too cheerful and much too shirtless after last night’s mistake. “Did you not hear me? Go away.”
The reflection of his six-pack burns my retinas. I return to my blanket cave.
Nico Navarro fingered me, and I let him.
Not only did I let him, but I indulged in every moment he spent kneeling between my legs until I was utterly, entirely, and wholly drunk on his touch. I got lost in how his hands drew constellations across my skin as he devoured me.
“We have things to discuss.” His weight slumps onto the end of my mattress.
Maybe if I stay hidden here, Nico and I can pretend nothing happened between us.
Just a casual evening with two casual friends hanging out in a casual hammock. Casually having orgasm after orgasm under the moonlight like some kind of werewolf mating session.
Casual.
Very casual.
Fuck.
I clear my throat. “You can leave my tea on the nightstand, thank you.”
How has everything changed in twelve hours, yet somehow it feels all too familiar?
“Sure, of course, I’ll set it down right here.” My mattress creaks as Nico’s weight lifts from my bed.
Aha! Easy.
In one swift pull, Nico strips the sheets off me.
“Hey,” I yelp and quickly stretch my pajama shirt over my exposed legs, wrapping both arms around my shins.
He tilts his head expectantly. “Good morning.” “We can ignore last night.”
“Not this again, Lil.” Nico sighs. “Remember when we did that with the kiss? Avoiding it isn’t the solution here.”
“There aren’t any solutions here to begin with. I’m leaving at the end of the month, and last night—”
“Well, at least you’re ready to stop pretending it didn’t happen.”
My eyes meet his in a glare. I hike up to the headboard, straightening my spine on the wood. “As I was saying, whatever happened was simply a result of terrible reasoning on my part. I let a broken vibrator and a lack of s*x cloud my judgment.” I search for another reason why last night was a mistake. “Plus, there was a full moon. Right? Maybe Mercury was in retrograde, and you definitely don’t ever want to mess with all that astrological power. Totally bad vibes.”
He smiles, leaning one of his toned arms on the bed. The same corded arm that hoisted me in the air and dropped me into a hammock.
My toes curl into the mattress.
“You’re blaming the way you came around my fingers on some kind of planetary misalignment?”
A frustrated groan rips itself out of my chest. “Something is definitely to blame.”
“Have I ever told you how pretty you look when you want to rip my throat out with your teeth or when you glare those stunning green eyes at me?” He arches his brow. “But you’re especially s*xy when you come. Speaking of—”
“No more speaking of it.”
When did we even go to sleep? All I remember is tossing and turning for hours, replaying every moment on the beach as a form of self-torture.
“I wanted to give you this.” Nico digs in the pocket of his shorts before presenting me with a woven lavender string knotted in a circle.
“What is it?”
“It’s a friendship bracelet, duh. I got one for me too.” He flashes me his other wrist. An identical bracelet wraps around his skin, stacked between the other bundles of leather, metal, and yarn.
“Huh,” I say, still staring at the gift in his hand. Now this is definitely a first for me.
“It’s to celebrate our friendship. You know, after last night, I th—” “Nico,” I deadpan. “Did you get me a fuck buddy bracelet?”
His brown eyes practically glimmer. “Interesting way to describe it.
Does that mean you’ve also been thinking about doing it again?”
My mind erupts in a circus of yeses and noes. It’s evident from the look on Nico’s face that he would love nothing more than to repeat last night’s moonlit frolicking. Especially since I’ve yet to return the favor.
But no. No.
Absolutely not. We can’t be fuck buddies with bracelets to match. This is exactly what I’ve been trying to avoid.
“Get out.”
“Hey, no. I’m sorry. Listen.” Nico gets to his feet and paces at the foot of my bed. “I’ve been up all night thinking about…” He shrugs one of his shoulders at me. “You.”
“I have that effect on people.” I try to play it cool, but his candid admission almost loosens the rusted hinges bolted around my heart.
His face slips into a frown. “You weren’t thinking about me?” The lie jumps out. “No, I was busy sleeping.”
“I’ll take credit for your beauty sleep. An amazing orgasm always knocks me out cold.”
“When did I say it was amazing?” I shift in my seat and ignore the tenderness between my legs. The man fingered me until I was sore.
Another first for me.
“Don’t lie, Lil. You want to do it again.”
“Shut up.” My eyes fling themselves into the back of my head, running away from the truth.
“Translation: Yes. Please, Nico. Make me come again.”
My cheeks heat. “Look, we did the one thing we said we shouldn’t. It was fun, you were very respectful, and I promise, if anyone asks, I’ll tell them you live up to what you say.”
“What are you talking about? I don’t need a booty-call reference.”
“I’m leaving soon, and if we stop right now, there’s a chance that by the time the holidays roll around, we won’t want to tear each other’s clothes off.”
It can’t go further. It wouldn’t be as simple as other flings. There’s history here. Close friendships and family are at stake.
Argh. This entire thing is so messy now. Why did I let my wretched s*x drive call the shots?
“You know as well as I do that before we hooked up, I wanted to tear those little black dresses you wear off your body. Whether I should or shouldn’t have.”
I shake my head as I try to ignore him. “And, of course, I’m happy to return the favor—just once, because it’s only fair, but otherwise—”
“I didn’t taste almost every gorgeous inch of your body so you can rub one out for me, Lily. What the fuck?” His mouth hangs open, stuck somewhere between concern and shock.
“I’m not trying to make it sound like some kind of obligation.” Quite the opposite—I’d be more than happy to even out the playing field and become more acquainted with what he’s packing down there. I mean, just the one time…so it’s fair.
“I don’t want you touching me unless you want to. This isn’t some twisted orgasm-for-an-orgasm situation. I would gladly repeat last night for the rest of the trip without anything in return.”
This time, my jaw cracks open.
Did I wake up in an alternate reality?
Men have always wanted something in return.
Nico towers over the bed. “I’ll leave right now if you’re not interested in hearing me out, but we can both agree last night was fucking hot. At least, it was the hottest thing I’ve seen and done in a long, long time, and I think we should do it again. Let’s just get it out of our systems.”
The darn heat creeps up my cheeks again.
For some reason, whether it’s the lack of sleep, the sanity-draining orgasms, or the fact I’m entirely out of my element, I consider his proposal.
Pro:
- Great s*x (maybe some of the best s*x I’ll ever have).
- Inspiration for novellas (not necessary, but always a good thing to have).
- It’s Nico (no introduction period).
Con:
- Best s*x I’ll ever have (very dangerous; being dick-whipped is not an option).
- It’s Nico (self-explanatory).
I desperately search for what my gut is telling me, but the only thing she’s reporting is fuck this man now, bitch.
Ugh. I should’ve listened to Molly’s lecture on gut health.
I inhale a deep breath. “Fine, we can try it out. I was tested back in May and I’m clean.”
I can’t believe I’m agreeing to this.
“Me too. All clear since I saw you at the bar after my tux fitting, and there hasn’t been anyone since then.” He smiles wide and scoots closer to me on the bed.
“We cannot tell Luca and Avery. Ever.” This isn’t the first big secret I’ve kept from my best friend, but it’s impossible to ignore the bullet of guilt aimed at my chest.
“Done.”
“And, um, w–we need rules,” I stammer. “A plan. Very clear lines to prevent things from getting complicated.”
Nico walks over to my desk. “Of course, anything you want.” “What are you doing?”
“If we’re taking this seriously, then this seems like the kind of thing that’s going to need a contract. What better use for your emotional-support journal?” He holds up my leather book and a pen.
“No!” I go to grab it, but his arm shoots out of reach. “Definitely not what the journal is meant for.”
“I’ll get you another one if you want, but right now, we’re using it to jot down all those rules you need so much.”
“We,” I correct him. “All the rules we need.”
“Right.” He plops down in the desk chair, cracking open the spine of my journal. His pointer finger runs down the center of the page. The act is
violently erotic. I stow away the idea for a sultry librarian novella. “Do you want to be the one to write?”
“Hmm?”
“The rules.” He squints.
“Fine.” I pull the journal from his hand. “Rule number one: no sleeping together. If you’re in my bed, it better be because we’re entertaining each other. Otherwise, you sleep in your own room.”
Nico beams. “Okay.” He leans over, puckering his lips for an expectant kiss. I extend out my palm, connect it with his forehead, and push him away.
“Rule number two: no PDA. No casual kissing, hand-holding, cuddling, or touching. None of it.” The ink bleeds onto the paper as I scribble down each rule.
“What? Awful rule.” He attempts to snatch the pen from me, but I pivot away. “Give it here. You’re terrible at this.”
“Hooking up is hooking up, but the other stuff makes it too easy to fall into a domestic routine. Affectionate touches here, longing stares there, and before you know it, all the benefits become liabilities.”
“Fine.” He rolls his eyes. “I want my own rule.”
Finally. “The more, the better.”
Nico looks at me pointedly. His tongue rolls between his white teeth. “No other people.”
“I guess you’re ready to admit that you were jealous last night.”
His smirk returns. “I don’t get jealous. I simply don’t like to share.” “So, no threesomes?”
“No threesomes.”
“Really?” I eye him scrupulously. “Not even with Susana?” “Only want you.”
I laugh off his severe tone and write down the rule. “Wow. I’m impressed you can commit to one woman for a few weeks. Remind me to give you a gold medal.” When I look back up to meet Nico’s eyes, he doesn’t appear mildly amused. “I didn’t mean for that to come off harsh, but I’m not naive to the reality of the world we live in. Men don’t commit. Even when they do, their desire for monogamy slowly fades.”
A familiar voice worms its way into my head again. Just you, Little Lily.
“I’m not like anyone you’ve been with,” Nico states.
“Yeah, sure.” I roll my eyes. Until I see it, I’ll simply wait for Nico to prove me right.
“No other people.” His voice drops to an uncompromising tone.
The depths of me awaken with an unquenchable desire to piss him off so I can hear it again.
I need another boundary to control myself. To not let myself slip too far. Even the reality of what we’re doing right now is tempting enough to say fuck these damn rules and take him right here, in my bed, out on the
balcony, even on the floor.
Anywhere. “No s*x.”
Nico’s face contorts with disappointment, then anger, then maybe
frustration. “What do you call what happened last night?” “Foreplay only. Everything else is too complicated.”
Nico smacks his lips together, a tightness settling into his jaw as he watches me. I, on the other hand, put on my most pleasant smile. “Fine. My dick doesn’t need to be inside you, Lily, to make you come.”
“Speaking of being inside of me. I don’t do blow jobs.”
“That’s too bad.” The corner of his mouth lifts. “I’ve always wanted to fuck that wicked grin off of your face, but I guess I can learn to compromise and let you wrap your pretty hands around my dick instead.”
My fingers shake as I scribble down the rule. “Right,” I mumble. “You know, you’re kind of a pro at this. How many friends-with-benefits have you had before?”
Why did I ask? I have no interest in hearing about the people Nico’s had casual arrangements with. But somewhere between the horny woman and the curious writer in me, I must know.
“Never with someone like you,” he says. “What does that mean?”
He looks as though he’s expecting me to guess what he’s trying to convey, but I draw a blank. I can’t exactly read minds.
“What’s that supposed to mean, Nico?”
“You know. You’re a one-of-a-kind woman.” His wicked brow rises without further explanation. “Have you done this in the past? Seems like you’re good at coming up with all of these rules.”
“No. I don’t do long-term things.”
“Ever?”
I knew this question was going to come up eventually. I don’t want to tell him. I don’t feel like explaining the result of my only long-term relationship to anyone.
But Nico isn’t just anyone. I guess I can try to share the easy part.
“No, never. I had an asshole boyfriend when I was younger. No long- term things since then.”
“What happened?” “He hurt me.”
The dreaded look of pity appears on Nico’s face. “Explains a lot.” “Rude.”
“I don’t mean anything malicious by it.” He raises his hand defensively, and I almost regret telling him. “You’re just…ruthless sometimes.”
“Am I?” I shift around.
“Only occasionally. Last summer, you discarded your hookups left and right.”
“If I were a guy, it would be no different. I mean, you have casual hookups all the time.”
“Of course, Lil. I’m not saying you can’t or shouldn’t. It’s fucked up that we live in a world where women are shamed for wanting s*x. As though the people judging have forgotten they’re usually the ones sleeping with them.”
“Correct. But it’s typical of you to think a man made me the way I am.” “I’m only assuming here, but did younger Lily have a trail of broken
hearts following her around?” Quite the opposite.
Ten years ago, I was soft, naive, and easy to break. Chuck may have been the catalyst for my evolution, but he’s not the only reason. I’ve worked hard to grow into the woman I am today.
“Not that many.” I don’t elaborate on the question any further. “Did younger Nico ever fuck anything up?”
“No,” he says. “Breaking hearts isn’t my thing. I don’t date without being clear about the situation.”
“Okay, what’s your version of clarity?”
“I don’t really stick around, not because I don’t want to or am afraid to, but because something inside me never settles. I’m respectful and patient. Hell, sometimes I get with a woman and it’s enough to enjoy her company.”
My heart sinks into my stomach for no apparent reason. “I just make sure to be very clear that I don’t anchor.”
“Well, then it’s good that this is temporary,” I remind him as much as myself.
It’s safer this way.
“I know you don’t want me to ask any more questions about the fuckface who hurt you, but thanks for telling me.” He looks at me with an almost sympathetic expression, setting me on edge. I skip away from the unnecessary pity.
“Yeah…”
“I guess it’s settled.”
I cross two Xs on the page, beneath our stack of rules, and sign on the line before handing the journal and pen over to him.
“We’ll go back to normal after this month,” I say. “No fucking up the friendship or ruining the family dynamics.”
He signs his name. “Easy.” His pupils widen again, and the predatory look returns. It’s a stare that’s becoming all too familiar.
I blink at him. “And, Nico, do me a favor.” “Anything, pretty girl.”
“Don’t become obsessed with me.”
He laughs with his whole body. “Done.” “I’m serious. I’m like a drug.”
Nico lifts me into his chest and presses me close enough to hear the racing rhythm of his heartbeat. “Don’t worry, princesa, I won’t fall in love with you. Promise.”
 |
June 12th
HI, my lovers,
What do you get when you mix a hot surf instructor, one broken vibrator, a jealous friend, and a nice new tan? A friends-with-benefits situation with someone who has proven to be very skilled with his hands.
I always like to say inspiration can come from anywhere, and it so happens this time inspiration came not once, not twice, but four different times.
To celebrate, I come bearing exciting news.
Coastal Fling made it onto the USA bestseller list. If you haven’t already seen the article from Ever Printing, you can read it here. For my international friends, when I get back from vacay, I’ll be sure to get the book uploaded for your enjoyment as well. I can’t wait to take Coastal Fling worldwide.
Leave a comment below with your juicy friends-with-benefits stories.
Kisses from me to you, Zoe Mona
