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Chapter no 28

One Dark Window (The Shepherd King, 1)

Providence Cards are ageless. Their magic does not fade. They do not decay with time. They cannot be destroyed.

Providence Cards are ageless.

 

Iย slipped out of Ravynโ€™s bed at dawn, careful not to wake him. I dug furiously at the clothes on the floor for my dress but found only my chemise. I might have searched longer had Ravyn not stirred behindย me, muttering something in a low growl. I froze, but he was still asleep, resting on his stomach, his broad back rising and falling in long, easy breaths. I slid my chemise over my head and tiptoed through the labyrinthine mess on his floor.

His chamber door was old, heavy. The untrustworthy kind that so often screamed on its hinges. I held my breath and pulled gently, and the door rewarded me with only a low groan. I slipped into the hallway and shut it behind me, releasing a triumphant exhale.

โ€œAn enjoyable evening, I hope.โ€ I whirled, my heart in my throat.

Jespyr stood a few doors down, already dressed for the day in Destrier black. Despite the dim light, the corridor torches not yet lit, there was no mistaking the wide, devious smile plastered across her face.

I crossed my arms over my chest, my chemise painfully sheer. โ€œYou startled me.โ€

โ€œSorry,โ€ she said, not sounding sorry at all. She looked me up and down, her eyes landing on the mess of my hair. โ€œYou lookโ€ฆ well rested.โ€

โ€œThank you,โ€ I said, slipping past her. I stopped at my door. โ€œYouโ€”you didnโ€™t hear anything, did you?โ€

She pressed her lips together. โ€œLike what?โ€ โ€œNothing. Never mind. See you at breakfast.โ€

I pushed into my room, the low rumble of her laugh following me.

The hearth in the great hall had been lit, breakfast on the table. Morette and Fenir sat with Emory, their voices low as they coaxed him with sweetbreads and bone broth. They greeted me with their usual friendliness, and I took my seat next to Jespyr, the apples of her cheeks rounding as I sat down.

โ€œWhat?โ€ I said through my teeth.

She smiled into her eggs. โ€œNothing.โ€

Elm joined us next, his auburn hair catastrophic, flailing every direction like heโ€™d slept in a windstorm. He landed in his chair with a plunk, yawning as he glanced up the table. โ€œNo Ravyn?โ€

Jespyrโ€™s fork scraped over her plate. I shot her a murderous glance.

Thistle entered the room with a fresh loaf of bread. Behind him, back in his Destrier clothes, came Ravyn.

Heat rose up my collar. Suddenly, I was very preoccupied with my plate. โ€œSmells amazing,โ€ Ravyn said, patting Thistleโ€™s back. He came up behind his parents and Emory, stealing a slice of bread off his fatherโ€™s plate.

He passed Elm, mussing his cousinโ€™s wild hair before taking a seat.

Everyone was watching him, brows high. When I looked up, Ravynโ€™s gaze was on me, his mouth upturned, his teeth tugging at his bottom lip. โ€œMorning.โ€

He looked stupidly handsome, smug to his boots. I hid behind my teacup. โ€œMorning.โ€

Next to him, Elmโ€™s face twisted in a grimace. โ€œWhat the hellโ€™s wrong with you?โ€

Ravyn took a bite of bread and leaned back in his chair. โ€œWhat do you mean?โ€

โ€œYouโ€™reย smiling.โ€ Elm looked over the table. โ€œDoes no one else find that incredibly unnerving?โ€

Jespyrโ€™s shoulders shook. She pressed a napkin to her mouth, laughter seeping out of her. โ€œWe told him he should smile more, didnโ€™t we?โ€

I kicked her under the table, which only made her laugh louder. Across

from us, Elmโ€™s eyes narrowed, jumping from Jespyr to Ravyn to me. When he noted the choke of red up my neck, paired with the unabashed grin on Ravynโ€™s face, he made a crudeย ughย sound and dropped his fork on his plate. โ€œAnd just like that, Iโ€™ve lost my appetite.โ€

Down the table, Emory coughed. When he put a cloth to his mouth, it came back red. His coughs echoed through the hall, stealing our smiles, the mood immediately turning somber, all of us remembering at once.

Emory had to go back to Stone today.

 

 

Jespyr went to get the carriage ready while the rest of us walked in the garden, our steps heavy. The dawn rain had subsided to a gentle haze, but the grass was overgrown. It didnโ€™t take long before my boots and the hem of my green dress were dark with water.

Emory wanted to see the trees in the garden before returning to his gilded cage in the Kingโ€™s castle. He walked ahead of us, his gray eyes wide as he rambled through the mist. Behind him, Elm wrapped his horsehair charm around his knuckles, his gaze trained on his young cousin.

Ravyn and I followed a pace behind, far enough apart that we did not touch, but close enough for me to feel that invisible wire pulling us together. Salt stung my nose as the wind picked up, cold air brushing my cheeks as several strands of dark hair flew across my face.

The back of Ravynโ€™s hand brushed against mine. โ€œIโ€™m glad you can see him as his true self,โ€ he said, nodding at Emory. โ€œHe doesnโ€™t have many days like this anymore.โ€

Does anyone?

I jumped, the Nightmareโ€™s voice startling me. I had not heard him since the day before. Foolishly, I had let myself revel in his absence, pretending my mind belonged to me alone.

Rainwater dripped off the trees above us, wetting my head and shoulders. I could smell the water on Ravynโ€™s wool cloak. He put an arm around me and pulled me beneath the same willow tree I had hid from him under. โ€œAre you all right?โ€ he asked, brushing my damp hair out of my face.

โ€œYou were gone when I woke up.โ€

I leaned into him. โ€œI wanted to let you rest.โ€

He kissed me, his fingers tangling in the hair at the nape of my neck. โ€œI donโ€™t want rest, Elspeth,โ€ he murmured into my lips. โ€œI want you.โ€

I was in the warmth of him, his body shielding me from Blunderโ€™s autumn breeze as it caught along the reeds of the willow tree. My arms fit perfectly around his waist and I wrapped them there, content to be held and kissed and windblown.

A small, pointed cough echoed nearby. Emory peered at us through the willowโ€™s branches, his lips curled in a mischievous grin. โ€œFound them,โ€ he called to Elm. โ€œThey were kissing.โ€

I blushed down to my roots, hiding my face in Ravynโ€™s cloak.

He smiled sheepishly, taking my hand and leading us back into the garden. Elm and Emory waited for us down the path, their arms crossed over their chests. Elm rolled his eyes. โ€œTrees, we get it. No need to rub our noses in it.โ€

โ€œWhat a shame,โ€ Emory sighed, his eyes tracing me. โ€œHere I was, thinking sheโ€™d come to kiss me. Thatโ€™s how the fairy tale goes, isnโ€™t it? Beautiful maiden saves sick boy with a kissโ€”boy miraculously heals and delivers the kingdom from dark magic.โ€

โ€œAlmost,โ€ Elm said, his green eyes flickering to me. โ€œExcept, in this fairy tale, the maiden has blood on her hands.โ€

 

 

I knew what I needed to do. Leaving Ravyn and Elm to bicker behind me, I hurried ahead, familiar bramble reaching out to snag my hair. โ€œEmory,โ€ I called. โ€œWait.โ€

The gray-eyed boy lingered beneath a wide yew tree, running his fingers across twisting branches. When he turned to me, the corner of his lip curled in a half smile. โ€œYes?โ€

I struggled with the words. Damp, my hair clung to the sides of my face. When I pushed it away, my nose filled with salt. โ€œI need to ask you something,โ€ I said, peering over my shoulder.

โ€œSomething you donโ€™t wish my brother and cousin to hear?โ€

My eyes moved past him. Beyond the yew treeโ€™s branches, I caught the looming shapes of the stone ruins. There, nestled in the mist below a great yew tree, sat the chamber, the darkness fixed in its window ensnaring me.

โ€œI need your magic, Emory,โ€ I said, my voice quivering. โ€œI need you to touch me again.โ€

The Nightmareโ€™s voice ripped through my mind.ย So this is how you unlock my secrets, Elspeth Spindle? You steal them?

โ€œAgain?โ€ Emory said.

You already know the truth.ย His snarl flooded my mind.ย Iโ€™ve told you the story.

I focused on Emoryโ€™s face. โ€œYou donโ€™t remember, but you touched my arm at Equinox. You told me things about myself Iโ€™d never told anyone. You saw into my mind.โ€ My eyes stung with tears. โ€œI want you to look again, Emory. Please. I need to know whoโ€”or whatโ€”he really is.โ€

โ€œHe?โ€ Emory asked, reaching out for my hand. โ€œYouโ€™ll see.โ€

When our hands clasped, Emory shut his eyes. His fingers flexed around mine, and when he spoke, his voice was strange, as if caught in a jarโ€”close and far away at once.

โ€œI see you, Elspeth Spindle,โ€ he said. โ€œI see a woman with long black hair and charcoal eyes. I see a yellow gaze narrowed by hate. I see darkness and shadow.โ€ His lips quivered. โ€œAnd I see your fingers, long and pale, covered in blood.โ€

โ€œWhat else?โ€ I pleaded. โ€œDo you see the Shepherd King? The man in gold armor?โ€

Emory shook his head, his brow creasing in concentration. โ€œI see a creature, curled around your spineโ€”as if woven into you.โ€

A chill wrapped itself around my throat. โ€œHow long do I have until he takes me over entirely?โ€

Emoryโ€™s eyes rolled behind his eyelids. โ€œNot long, Elspeth Spindle. He is close.โ€

I tried to pull my hand away, but Emory clung to it, his voice hitching. โ€œHe hunches, not animal, not man, but something between. He stands in the room he built for the Spirit of the Wood, perched upon a tall, dark stone.โ€ Emoryโ€™s face twisted, his features contorted in fear. โ€œHe whispers

something.โ€

โ€œWhat does he say?โ€ I asked, my heart in my throat.

Emoryโ€™s hand shook. When he spoke, his voice was strangeโ€”slippery. โ€œThere once was a girl,โ€ he said, โ€œclever and good, who tarried in shadow in the depths of the wood. There also was a King, a shepherd by his crook, who reigned over magic and wrote the old book. The two were together, so the two were the sameโ€ฆโ€

He did not have to say the rest. I knew it by heart. โ€œThe girl, the Kingโ€ฆโ€ I breathed.

The Nightmareโ€™s voice burned through my mind.ย And the monster they became.

Emoryโ€™s eyes shot open, all the color blanched out of his face. โ€œYour eyes,โ€ he gasped, tears streaming down his cheeks. โ€œTheyโ€™re yellow.โ€

I looked away, blinking furiously.

โ€œWhat was that?โ€ Emory asked, his voice still hitching. โ€œIt was like something out of a terrible dream.โ€

โ€œOh, Emory,โ€ I said, suddenly wrought with guilt. He was so young, so burdened by his own degeneration. To put my own worries in his hands had been more than selfishโ€”it had been wrong.

โ€œIโ€™m so sorry,โ€ I said. โ€œI shouldnโ€™t have done that to you.โ€

Beyond the yew tree, I heard the others rustling. โ€œEmory,โ€ Ravyn called. โ€œItโ€™s time.โ€

I turned to Emory with a pleading look. โ€œYou wonโ€™t say anything, will you?โ€

The boy tried to smile. โ€œDonโ€™t worry,โ€ he said, wiping the tears from his eyes. โ€œIโ€™ll forget by morning. Thatโ€™s the one mercy of my degeneration. I donโ€™t remember my nightmares.โ€ He let go of my hand, his gray eyes forlorn. โ€œGoodbye, Elspeth Spindle. Be wary. Be clever. Be good.โ€

When our fingers fell apart, my hand felt cold. I wanted to reach for him again, to tell him the fairy tale was trueโ€”that somehow, I could heal him. Not with a kiss, but with the Cards, all twelve collected, a means to save himโ€”to save myself.

But I had grown tired of pretending. So I said nothing, my spine hunching as the Nightmareโ€™s claws curled around it.

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