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Chapter no 1

Nothing More to Tell

Brynn

โ€Œโ€œDo you have a favorite crime?โ€โ€Œ

The girl sitting beside me in the spacious reception area asks the question so brightly, with such a wide smile, that Iโ€™m positive I must have misheard her. โ€œA favoriteย what?โ€ I ask.

โ€œCrime,โ€ she says, still smiling.

Okay. Did not mishear. โ€œIn general, orโ€”โ€ I start cautiously.

โ€œFrom the show,โ€ she says, a note of impatience creeping into her voice. Which is fair. I should have known what she meant, considering weโ€™re sitting in the middle of temporary office space forย Motive.

I try to recover. โ€œOh, yeah, of course. Hard to pick. Theyโ€™re all soโ€ฆโ€ Whatโ€™s the right word here? โ€œCompelling.โ€

โ€œIโ€™m obsessed with the Story case,โ€ she says, and bamโ€”sheโ€™s off. Iโ€™m impressed by all the rich detail she remembers from a show that aired more than a year ago. Sheโ€™s obviously aย Motiveย expert, whereas Iโ€™m a more recent convert to the true-crime arm of journalism. Truth be told, I wasnโ€™t expecting to land an interview for this internship. My application wasโ€ฆ unconventional, to say the least.

Desperate times and all that.

Less than two months ago, in October of my senior year, my life was fully on track. I was living in Chicago, editor in chief of the school paper, applying early decision to my dream school, Northwestern. Two of my best friends planned on staying local too, so we were already dreaming about getting an apartment together. And then: one disaster after the other. I was fired from the paper, wait-listed at Northwestern, and informed by my parents that Dadโ€™s job was transferring him back to company headquarters.

Which meant returning to my hometown of Sturgis, Massachusetts, and moving into the house my parents had been renting to my uncle Nick since weโ€™d left. โ€œItโ€™ll be a fresh start,โ€ Mom said, conveniently forgetting the part where Iโ€™d been desperate to leave four years ago.

Since then, Iโ€™ve been scrambling to find some kind of internship that might make Northwestern take a second look at me. My first half dozen rejections were all short, impersonal form letters. Nobody had the guts to say what they were really thinking:ย Dear Ms. Gallagher, since your most- viewed article as editor of the school paper was a compilation of dick pics, you are not suitable for this position.

To be clear, I neither took nor posted the dick pics. Iโ€™m just the loser who left the newspaper office door unlocked and forgot to log out of the main laptop. It doesnโ€™t really matter, though, because my name was in the byline that got screenshotted a thousand times and eventually ended up on BuzzFeed with the headlineย WINDY CITY SCHOOL SCANDAL:ย PRANK OR PORNOGRAPHY?

Both, obviously. After the seventh polite rejection, it occurred to me that when something like that is your number one result in a Google search, thereโ€™s no point trying to hide it. So when I applied toย Motive,ย I took a different tack.

The girl beside me is still talking, wrapping up an impressively in- depth analysis of the Story family saga. โ€œWhere do you go to school?โ€ she asks. Sheโ€™s wearing a cute moto jacket over a graphic T-shirt and black jeans, and it comforts me that weโ€™re dressed somewhat alike. โ€œIโ€™m a

sophomore at Emerson. Majoring in media arts with a minor in journalism, but Iโ€™m thinking about flipping those.โ€

โ€œIโ€™m still in high school,โ€ I say.

โ€œReally?โ€ Her eyes pop. โ€œWow, I didnโ€™t realize this internship was even open to high school students.โ€

โ€œI was surprised too,โ€ I say.

Motiveย wasnโ€™t on the list of internships Iโ€™d compiled with my former guidance counselorโ€™s help; my fourteen-year-old sister, Ellie, and I came across it when we were combing through Boston.com. Until we did a Google search onย Motive,ย I hadnโ€™t realized that the showโ€™s host, Carly Diaz, had temporarily relocated from New York to Boston last summer to be near a sick parent.ย Motiveย isnโ€™t a household name, exactly, but itโ€™s a buzzy, upstart true-crime show. Right now the show only airs on a small cable station, but there are rumors that it might get picked up by one of the big streamers soon.

The Boston.com article was headlinedย CARLY DIAZ MAKES AND BREAKS HER OWN RULES, accompanied by a photo of Carly in a bright pink trench coat, standing arms akimbo in the middle of Newbury Street. She didnโ€™t look like the kind of person whoโ€™d judge you for a public setback; she looked more like the kind of person whoโ€™d expect you to own it.

โ€œSo do you work for your school paper?โ€ the girl asks. Way to twist the knife, Emerson Girl. โ€œNot currently, no.โ€ โ€œReally?โ€ Her brow furrows. โ€œThen howโ€”โ€

โ€œBrynn Gallagher?โ€ the receptionist calls. โ€œCarly will see you now.โ€

โ€œCarly?โ€ย Emerson Girlโ€™s eyes widen as I scramble to my feet. โ€œWhoa.

I didnโ€™t know she was doing the interviews herself.โ€

โ€œHere goes nothing,โ€ I say. Suddenly Emerson Girl and her endless questions feel like a safe harbor, and I smile at her like sheโ€™s an old friend as I loop my messenger bag over my shoulder. โ€œWish me luck.โ€

She gives me a thumbs-up. โ€œYou got this.โ€

I follow the receptionist down a short, narrow hallway into a large conference room with floor-to-ceiling windows overlooking Back Bay. I canโ€™t focus on the view, though, because Carly Diaz gets up from her chair

at the end of the table with a megawatt smile, extending her hand toward me. โ€œBrynn, welcome,โ€ she says.

Iโ€™m so flustered that I almost sayย Youโ€™re welcomeย in return but manage to catch myself just in time. โ€œThank you,โ€ I say, grasping her hand. โ€œItโ€™s so nice to meet you.โ€ The phraseย larger than lifeย springs to mind, even though Carly would be tiny without her four-inch heels. But she radiates energy, like sheโ€™s lit from within. Her dark hair is impossibly thick and shiny, her makeup is impeccable, and sheโ€™s wearing such a simple yet elegant dress that it makes me want to throw out my entire wardrobe and start over.

โ€œPlease, have a seat,โ€ Carly says, settling back into her chair as the receptionist slips into the hallway. โ€œHelp yourself to a drink if youโ€™d like.โ€

Glass tumblers are in front of us, on either side of a pitcher thatโ€™s filled to the brim with water and ice. I weigh my slight thirst against the strong possibility of spilling the pitcherโ€™s contents all over myself or, worse yet, the laptop beside Carly. โ€œNo thanks, Iโ€™m good.โ€

Carly folds her hands in front of her, and I canโ€™t help but notice her rings. Sheโ€™s wearing one on almost every finger, all bold designs in rich gold. Her nails are glossy with dark red polish and perfectly shaped, but short. โ€œAll right,โ€ she says, smirking a little. โ€œYou know why youโ€™re here, right?โ€

โ€œFor an interview?โ€ I ask hopefully.

โ€œSure.โ€ The smirk gets bigger. โ€œWe received almost five hundred resumes for this internship. Mostly local college and grad students, but a few willing to relocate for the opportunity.โ€ My heart sinks a little as she adds, โ€œItโ€™s hard to stand out when thereโ€™s that much competition, but I have to admit, Iโ€™ve never come across an application quite like yours. One of my producers, Lindzi, saw it first and forwarded it right away.โ€

Carly presses a button on her laptop, angles the screen toward me, and

โ€”there it is. My email, all nine words of it.ย Not my best work,ย I wrote, underlined with a link to the BuzzFeed dick pic article.ย Thank you for your consideration.

My cheeks warm as Carly says, โ€œYou did some interesting things with that email. First, you made me laugh. Out loud, once I clicked the link.

Then I actually went searching for articles youโ€™d written, since you hadnโ€™t bothered to include any. I took fifteen minutes out of a very busy day to look you up.โ€ She leans back in her chair, fingers steepled under her chin as her dark eyes bore into mine. โ€œThatโ€™s never happened before.โ€

I want to smile, but Iโ€™m not entirely sure sheโ€™s complimenting me. โ€œI was hoping youโ€™d appreciate the honesty,โ€ I hedge. โ€œAnd the, um, brevity.โ€

โ€œRisky move,โ€ Carly says. โ€œBut bold, which I can respect. Itโ€™s bullshit that you got fired for that, by the way. Any idea who posted the pics?โ€

โ€œI know exactly who it was,โ€ I say, folding my arms tightly across my chest. Iโ€™d been working on a new story about rumored grade-fixing involving a few players in our state-champion basketball team. Their captain, a mouth-breather named Jason Pruitt, cornered me at my locker after English one day and said the only two words heโ€™d ever spoken to me:ย Back off.ย I didnโ€™t, and a week later the dick pics happened, at almost exactly the same time that basketball practice ended. โ€œBut the guy denied it, and I couldnโ€™t prove it.โ€

โ€œIโ€™m sorry,โ€ Carly says. โ€œYou deserved more support than that. And your work is excellent.โ€ I relax my rigid posture and almost smile, because this is all going a lot better than expected, but then she adds, โ€œI wasnโ€™t planning on hiring a high school student, though.โ€

โ€œThe job description didnโ€™t say you have to be in college,โ€ I point out. โ€œThat was an oversight,โ€ Carly says.

I deflate, but only briefly. She wouldnโ€™t have brought me in if she werenโ€™t at least considering waiving that requirement. โ€œIโ€™ll work twice as hard as any college student,โ€ I promise. โ€œI can be in the office anytime Iโ€™m not in school, including nights and weekends.โ€ย Because I have no life here,ย I almost add, but Carly doesnโ€™t need that much context. โ€œI know Iโ€™m not the most experienced person youโ€™re talking to, but Iโ€™ve been working toward becoming a journalist since I was in middle school. Itโ€™s the only thing Iโ€™ve ever wanted to be.โ€

โ€œWhy is that?โ€ she asks.

Because itโ€™s the only thing Iโ€™ve ever been good at.

Iโ€™m from one of those families where people are effortlessly talented. Dad is a brilliant research scientist, Mom is an award-winning childrenโ€™s book illustrator, and Ellie is practically a musical prodigy on flute. All of them knew from birth, pretty much, what they wanted to do. I flailed around for most of my childhood trying to find myย thingโ€”the talent that would define meโ€”while secretly worrying that I was another Uncle Nick. โ€œHe just doesnโ€™t know what he wants out of life,โ€ my dad would sigh every time his much younger half brother switched majors yet again. โ€œHe never has.โ€

It seemed like the worst possible trait for a Gallagher, to not know what you want. As much as I love Uncle Nick, I didnโ€™t want to be the family slacker, part two. So it was a relief when I reached eighth grade and my English teacher singled me out for my writing. โ€œYou should work on the school paper,โ€ he suggested. I did, and for the first time, I found something that came naturally to me. Itโ€™s been my identity ever sinceโ€”โ€œBrynn will be anchoring CNN one of these days,โ€ my parents like to sayโ€”and it was terrifying to lose that last fall. To see something that Iโ€™d worked so hard for, and been so proud of, turned into a joke.

I donโ€™t know how to explain that in an interview-friendly sound bite, though. โ€œBecause you can make a real difference with every story, and give a voice to people who donโ€™t have one,โ€ I say instead.

โ€œWell stated,โ€ Carly says politely. For the first time since we sat down, though, she looks a little bored, and I flush. I gave what I thought was a safe response, but that was probably a mistake with someone like Carly. She didnโ€™t bring me in here because my application wasย safe.ย โ€œYou do realize weโ€™re not theย New York Times,ย though, right? True-crime reporting is a very specific niche, and if you arenโ€™t passionate about itโ€”โ€

โ€œI am, though.โ€ Itโ€™s a risk to interrupt her, I know, but I canโ€™t let her dismiss me. The more I looked intoย Motive,ย the more I realized that it was exactly the kind of opportunity I neededโ€”one where I could do more than just check a box on my college applications. โ€œThatโ€™s something I wanted to talk to you about. Iโ€™ve done all the things you mentioned in the job posting

โ€”social media, copyediting, fact-checking, et cetera. I have an actual

resume I can show you, plus references. But also, if youโ€™re interested, I have a story idea.โ€

โ€œOh?โ€ Carly asks.

โ€œYeah.โ€ I dig into my messenger bag and pull out the manila folder I carefully assembled in preparation for this interview. โ€œAn unsolved murder from my hometown.โ€

Carly raises her brows. โ€œAre you pitching me right now? In the middle of an interview?โ€

I freeze with the folder half-open, unable to tell from her tone whether sheโ€™s impressed, amused, or annoyed. โ€œYes,โ€ I admit. โ€œIs that okay?โ€

โ€œBy all means,โ€ she says, lips quirking. โ€œGo on.โ€ Amused. Could be worse.

The clipping Iโ€™m looking for is right on top. Itโ€™s a photo from theย Sturgis Times,ย captionedย Saint Ambrose Students Brynn Gallagher and Noah Talbot Win Statewide Eighth-Grade Writing Competition.ย My thirteen-year-old self is standing between two other people, smiling widely and holding up the Olympic-style medal around my neck.

โ€œAw, look at how cute you were,โ€ Carly says. โ€œCongratulations.โ€ โ€œThanks, but I didnโ€™t hang on to this because of the award. I kept it for

him.โ€ I tap my finger on the man in the pictureโ€”young, handsome, and smiling. Even in two-dimensional photo form, heโ€™s brimming with energy. โ€œThis was my English teacher, William Larkin. It was his first year teaching at Saint Ambrose, and he was the one who insisted I enter the writing contest. He also got me started on the school paper.โ€

My throat thickens as I hear Mr. Larkinโ€™s voice in my head, as clear today as it was four years ago.ย You have a gift,ย he said, and I donโ€™t think he realized how much those words meant to me. I never told him, which is something Iโ€™ll always regret. โ€œHe was constantly trying to get students to live up to their potential,โ€ I say. โ€œOr see it, if they didnโ€™t think they had any.โ€

I look up to make sure I have Carlyโ€™s full attention before adding, โ€œTwo months after this picture was taken, Mr. Larkin was dead. Bludgeoned with a rock in the woods behind Saint Ambrose. Three of my classmates

found the body.โ€ This time, I tap the boy in the picture, whoโ€™s wearing a medal identical to mine. โ€œIncluding him.โ€

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