The rest of the day passed in a whirlwind of new classes and unfamiliar faces. It was actually a relief to see the Waltersโ rickety house when the truck pulled into the driveway after school.
โWeโre home, Aunt Kathy!โ Lee shouted as soon as he walked through the door. โWhatโs for dinner?โ
Danny, Lee, and I had to step over a pile of boxes in the front hall. We were the only ones who actually left school at three oโclock. Alex had baseball practice; Cole caught a bus to his job at a local auto-repair shop; Nathan stayed in the music room; and Isaac never showed, which apparently was normal because we left after only a five-minute wait. I planned to join a few after-school clubs, but I decided it could wait until next week when, hopefully, I didnโt feel so weary.
โHello to you too,โ I heard Katherine call from the kitchen. The smell of something amazing was drifting down the hall. We found her standing at the counter cutting open a huge pile of buns.
โHell, yeah,โ Lee said when he lifted the top of the slow cooker. โI love me some sloppy joe.โ
โWhatโs sloppy joe?โ Whatever it was, it sounded disgusting.
Katherine, Lee, and Danny all stared at me like I was speaking an alien language.
โYouโre never had a sloppy joe before? What kind of crazy planet are you from?โ Lee asked.
โLee, be nice,โ Katherine scolded, pointing the serrated knife she was using to cut buns in Leeโs direction. โA sloppy joe is a ground-beef sandwich,โ she explained to me. โWeโre having them for dinner and you can try one then. The rest of your things arrived today, so in the meantime, why donโt you work on moving into your room? I cleared out all of the art supplies, and Danny can help you bring the boxes up and unpack.โ
โWhy canโt Lee help?โ Danny asked.
โBecause heโs going to help Parker with her math homework.โ โI am?โ
โWould you rather carry boxes up to Jackieโs room?โ
โRight. Two plus two. Iโm all over that shit,โ Lee said and left the kitchen before Katherine could change her mind.
โAll right, you two,โ Katherine said, picking up another bun. โWhy donโt you get started? I want those boxes out of the front hall by the time everyone else gets home.โ
Twenty minutes of tense silence passed as we moved my things to my room. While we worked, we hurried by each other on the stairs, trying to avoid bumping into one another or making awkward eye contact. Finally, I collapsed on my bed feeling sore and sweaty as Danny set the last box on the floor.
โThanks a bunch for your help. This would have taken forever without you.โ
Danny nodded his head and quickly turned to leave without a word, but my room was now a maze of cardboard towers. His foot connected with one of the piles, and the box teetering on the top crashed to the floor. My Shakespeare collection spilled out, and Danny dropped down to pick it up.
โSorry,โ he mumbled and scooped the books back into the box.
โDonโt worry about it,โ I said, jumping off my bed. โI can take care of it.โ I spottedย A Midsummer Nightโs Dreamย and wanted to grab it for Alex. By knocking over the books, Danny actually did me a favor because I wouldnโt have to search through all the boxes to find them. I plucked the play off the floor, and Danny stopped to examine what was in his hands.
โRomeo and Juliet?โ he asked, reading out the title. The rise in his voice revealed his surprise. โYou like drama?โ
โOf course, Iโm a New Yorker! Iโve been attending all types of different performances since I was little. I have a personal soft spot for Shakespeare, but I also admire Shaw and Millerโs work.โ When I responded, Danny clamped his mouth shut as if he just realized that he had spoken to me.
โOh, cool.โ He shoved one last book back into the box and shot to his feet. โIโll see you later.โ He was out the door before I could mutter a goodbye.
Running my hand over the cover of my favorite play, I grinned to myself. My encounter with Danny could have gone a little better, but at least now I knew we shared a similar interest. Maybe I would make more friends in the Walter house than I had originally thought. Apparently I just needed to tackle the boys one at time.
***
At dinner I tried my first sloppy joe ever, and I immediately understood the reason behind the name. It was impossible to keep the meat on the bun. It oozed out every time I took a bite and splattered against my plate. My fingers and face were disgusting by the time I finished. I thought it made more sense to put the slop in a bowl and dip the bun in, but the Walters seemed to enjoy diving in face-first.
When everyone was full, we all had to help clean up the table, but afterward we were allowed to do whatever we wanted. Parker and the little twins rushed to the living room and battled over the remote. Jack and Jordan went to edit the footage they got of me eating my first sloppy joe. Isaac challenged Alex to a pickup game of hoops, while Lee and Nathan disappeared into their rooms. The freedom felt strange. At boarding school I was used to a strict schedule of dinnertime, homework, and lights out at nine.
Trying to keep some normalcy in my life, I climbed the stairs toward my room to do schoolwork. Although I wasnโt assigned anything in particular, I
knew I was behind in English. The class was already halfway through readingย Moby Dick, which was thicker than any of the textbooks Iโd received throughout the day. Five pages in, I shut the book in irritation and pulled out Alexโs copy ofย The Fellowship of the Ring.
Someone knocked on the door.
โJackie?โ Cole asked, poking his head inside. He hadnโt been at dinner, and judging by the Tonyโs Auto Repair jumpsuit he was wearing with his name stitched onto the breast, heโd just gotten back from work.
โMmm-hmm?โ I sat up in bed. Glancing at my clock, I realized that two hours had vanished since I started reading.
โEveryoneโs out in the backyard. Weโre going to play some night games. You want in?โ He was wearing a baseball cap backward to hide the fact that his bangs were plastered to his forehead and there was a smear of grease across his nose, but somehow just one glance at him made my pulse surge.
โWhatโs a night game?โ I asked, trying to keep my voice even.
โGames you play outside in the dark. You know, like kick the can, cops and robbers, ghost in the graveyardโฆโ Cole trailed off as he waited for me to catch on.
โSorry, but Iโve never heard of those.โ
โWhat the heck did you do for fun when you were growing up?โ
โIโve been to my fair share of Broadway shows, and my family has memberships to most of the museums.โ As soon as the words were out of my mouth, I realized my mistake. My familyย hadย memberships to most of the museums.
โSounds awful,โ Cole said. โHow about we show you what real fun looks like?โ
As nice as it was that Cole was inviting me to do something with the rest of the guys, I couldnโt bring myself to accept. The thought of hanging out with all the Walter boys was intimidating. Besides, thoughts of my family were now swirling around in my head, and I knew I would only be able to hold back the tears until Cole left. I didnโt want him to see me crying.
โIโve got some catching up to do in most of my classes. Maybe another time?โ
โCome on, Jackie. Itโs not like your teachers expect you to know everything youโve missed by tomorrow.โ
Pulling my knees up to my chest, I blinked my eyes, trying to keep them from watering up and my feelings from spilling out. โSorry, Cole, but itโs been a long first day.โ
I thought he was going to continue arguing, but he must have sensed that something was wrong. โOkay. In any case, you know where to find us if you change your mind.โ
Cole shut the door. I sat unmoving, staring at the swirling blue of the ocean waves that Katherine had painted on the wall. It reminded me of my childhood summersโwarm, sunny days spent at the beach house in the Hamptons, where Lucy and I would munch on fresh picnics spread out on our beach towels and suntan on the seashore, occasionally dipping our toes into the cold water to cool off.
I needed to hear a familiar voice, someone who could comfort me.
Grabbing my cell phone off the desk, I dialed a number I knew by heart.
Sammy picked up on the first ring. โHola, chica, whatโs up?โ
At the sound of my best friendโs voice, my lips started to tremble, and I could only manage a measly greeting without bursting into tears.
โOh my God, Jackie. Whatโs wrong? Is Colorado, like, horrible or something?โ she asked.
โSammy, itโs worse than horrible. Iโm on a ranch in the middle of nowhere. Katherine Walter has twelve kids, and I havenโt seen a Starbucks since leaving New York.โ
โHoly cupcakes! That string bean of a woman pushed twelve people out her who-ha?โ
I managed a half smile. โOnly ten of the boys are hers. Two of them are nephews.โ
Sammy gasped. โDid you just say boys plural, as inย allย twelve kids have a Y chromosome?โ
โParkerโs a girl, but she doesnโt act like it.โ
โThatโs still pretty good odds, if you ask me. Any hotties?โ
โSammy,โ I groaned. The Walters were the last thing I wanted to talk about.
โWhat? Thatโs a completely reasonable question. My best friend is completely isolated from civilization, so itโd be nice to know if she at least has some eye candy to cheer her up.โ
There might be one or two drool-worthy guys.ย As soon as the thought crossed my mind, I felt the guilt twisting in my stomach. How could I be thinking about cute boys when my family was gone? โCan we please talk about something else?โ I muttered into the phone.
โTalking about delicious boys is my version of therapy.โ โYouโre not cheering me up.โ
โThatโs totally what Iโm doing. Now spill! Whatโs his name?โ
I paused, not sure if I should tell her. One little name wonโt hurt, I decided. After all, it didnโt mean anything. A sigh escaped my lips. โItโs Cole.โ His name came out in a whisper, as if I was giving away a secret.
โHmm. I guess thatโs hot. I mean itโs no Blake or Declan, but Cole has a nice ring to it. Okay, now give me details. What does he look like?โ
I buried my face in my pillow. โThis is not how I envisioned our conversation going.โ
โYouโre making the whole process difficult with all the stalling.โ
โFine,โ I said quickly. โHeโs tall, blond, and from the sound of things, a complete pig. Besides, I canโt even think about boys right now. I just want to come home, okay?โ
โOh, Jackie,โ Sammy said, her voice soft. โI wasnโt trying to upset you. I just wanted to take your mind off the bad things.โ
โI know,โ I responded, feeling bad that Iโd snapped. โItโs just, all my stuff arrived today, and I canโt bring myself to unpack it. It would make everything feel so permanent.โ
โI totally feel you, sister. My new roommate moved in last night. It was so weird seeing someone elseโs stuff on your side of the room. And donโt
even get me started about French class. Like, I had to sit by myself.โ
The cord around my heart tightened as I thought about my old school, old dorm room, and old classes. The move to Colorado had cut me off from my old life and everything that was familiar to me, and the only remaining link to that world was my best friend. โSammy, you donโt know how good it is to hear your voice. I miss you so much. I wishโI wishโฆโ
โJackie,โ Sammy said slowly and deliberately. โEverything is going to get better, okay? Just promise me youโll make an effort to settle in. It will help. I know it.โ
โOkay,โ I told her even though I didnโt want to.
We stayed on the phone for the next hour. Talking to Sammy made me feel a little better, but as I curled up under the covers of my bed, a feeling of complete and utter loneliness kept me wide awake.
***
The next morning, getting up to run with Nathan was nothing short of torture. No matter how many times I rubbed my eyes, I couldnโt shake off the blanket of drowsiness that was draped over my entire body. Then I caught Olivia sneaking out of Coleโs room. It was such a shock, seeing her standing in the hallway with rumpled hair and wearing one of his shirts, that I was instantly snapped awake. We both stared at each other with the same deer-in-the-headlights look, and then Nathan stepped out of his room, making the situation even more awkward. Even worse, we all had to walk down the stairs together.
โSoโฆโ I said once Oliviaโs car had pulled out the driveway. We were sitting on the front porch, stretching before our run. โDoes Cole normally haveย friendsย stay over?โ
Nathan pulled his ankle back behind him, focusing on his hamstring. โOccasionally, but not too often. I suppose he doesnโt want to get caught.โ
โWhy?โ
โBecause,โ he said, looking at me as if I was acting stupid, โour dad would kill him.โ
โI get that,โ I said, pulling my hair back into a ponytail. โI mean, why is he such aโโ
โA guy?โ
I must have tugged my hair tie too tight, because it snapped and my bangs tumbled down into my face. โYou know thatโs not what I meant,โ I said, sighing in frustration. โYouโre a guy. I donโt see you sleeping around.โ โI guess he wasnโt always this way,โ he said with a shrug. โBut Coleโs
never been one to share his feelings.โ โSo what changed?โ
Nathan paused and gave me a wary look. โIf I tell you, you canโt repeat any of this to Cole, all right? Heโs kind of touchy about the subject.โ
โOkay.โ
โHe lost his football scholarship last year.โ
โHow did he manage that?โ My mind immediately jumped to negatives
โdrugs, drinking, horrible gradesโso I was surprised by Nathanโs response.
โDuring a game. He was the best receiver in the state until he got tackled wrong and broke his leg,โ Nathan said. โObviously his leg got better, but I donโt think he was the same after that. Didnโt even go to tryouts this year.โ
โThatโs horrible,โ I said, feeling guilty. Maybe there was more to Cole Walter than girls and sex.
After our run, I went to shower, cranking the handle to cold in an attempt to cool off. The water did its job, and when I was done washing my hair, I hopped out with new life. Standing on the shower mat dripping wet, I looked around. The hook where my towel was supposed to be was empty. What the heck? Iโd hung it up only moments before stepping into the shower.
A sudden thought crossed my mind, and I glanced at the counter. My heart hammered against my chest as dread surged through meโthe pile of neatly folded clothes was missing. Someone must have snuck into the bathroom while I was showering and stolen my towel and clothes!
I flung open the bathroom cabinets in hopes that I would find something,ย anythingย I could use to cover myself up, but I knew that my search would be useless. The shelves were filled with toilet paper, soap, and washcloths, but nothing that could help me.
โNo, no, no!โ I muttered to myself. โThis canโt be happening.โ How in the world would I get to my room without one of the boys seeing me?
โEverything okay in there, Jackie?โ Isaac asked, knocking on the bathroom door.
โUm, not exactly,โ I said, my cheeks flaming. โThere are no towels in here.โ
โWhy didnโt you bring one in with you?โ he asked, trying to contain a snicker.
โI did! Someone took it. Do you mind running upstairs and grabbing me one?โ
โI donโt think so.โ โWhy the heck not?โ
โBecause I bet Cole five dollars that youโd rather miss school than streak through the hallways. I donโt want to lose a Lincoln, now do I?โ
What a complete pervert!
Although I wanted to avoid stepping on the boysโ toes so I could fit in more easily, there was no way I was going to let Isaac get away with this. โKATHERINE!โ I screamed at the top of my lungs. With any luck she would hear me from the kitchen. โISAAC STOLE MY TOWEL!โ
โSorry, Jackie, but my aunt took Zack and Benny to a dentist appointment, so she wonโt be able to help you. Besides, I never saidย Iย took your towel. I just said I wonโt be providing you with another one.โ
โPlease, Isaac,โ I begged, my voice jumping up in desperation. โI donโt want to miss school.โ
โHey, Iโm not stopping you. Weโre leaving in ten, so you better hurry up.โ
โIsaac!โ I shouted, pounding on the door. โThis isnโt funny.โ When there was no response, I knew heโd left me stranded in the bathroom.
I slammed my fist into the door one last time before letting my forehead rest against the smooth wood in frustration. School was importantโin fact, it was my lifeโbut there was no way I would ever run through the Waltersโ house completely nude. I was going to have to wait for Katherine to come home from the dentist, and by then the boys would already be at school.
Goose bumps swept up my arms as I stood in a puddle shivering. It looked like I was going to be stuck in the bathroom for a while, so I decided to step back into a hot shower to keep warm. I started to pull back the shower curtain when an idea came to me. The curtain had two parts: an inner layer of clear plastic to keep water from getting on the floor, and the second, a dark blue piece of fabric for privacy. Unfortunately, little silver rings were holding the fabric up. If only I could separate the fabric from the rest of the curtain. Maybe if I tugged hard enoughโฆ
Gripping the material in my hands, I yanked with all my strength, but instead of ripping down what I wanted, I felt the entire pole above the shower topple onto my head.
โDang it!โ I cursed as it clattered against the floor. Even though my head was throbbing, I quickly scooped the pole up and slid the curtain off. Then I tore the plastic section away from the rings and used the remaining blue fabric to form a makeshift towel. Since it was in the little kidsโ bathroom, a hideous pattern of monkeys and bananas covered the curtain, but it would have to do. Hopefully Katherine wonโt be mad at me, I thought, looking down at the mess Iโd made. I could always replace whatever Iโd ruined.
Instead of peeking into the hall to make sure the coast was clear, I threw open the door and rushed toward the stairs.
โIsaac, the pigeon has flown the coop! Repeat, pigeon flown coop!โ Glancing over my shoulder, I saw Jack with a walkie-talkie. Next to him was Jordan with the video camera in his hands, green light blinking.
โShe was supposed to be naked,โ Jack said as if Iโd caused him some type of inconvenience.
Not bothering to stop or even yell at the twins, I started taking the stairs two at a time, wanting to get to my room before someone else spotted me
wearing the shower curtain. Isaac appeared at the top of the landing, the second walkie-talkie in hand and a wicked grin on his face.
โI didnโt think sheโd actuallyโโ He stopped when he saw me. โOh, arenโt you clever? I didnโt even think about the shower curtain.โ
โMove,โ I said and shoved past him.
โJackie, wait!โ Jordan called, chasing me with the camera. โCan you answer a few questions for our film? For starters, do girls ever play with their boobs?โ
The twins followed me down the hall to my room, bombarding me with ridiculous questions until I slipped inside and locked the door. Leaning against the wood, I closed my eyes and slid to the floor.
โCan you explain girlsโ obsession with shoes?โ I heard Jack saying from the other side. โWhy do you need so many?โ
โAsk the bathroom question. That oneโs good.โ
โYeah, it is. Jackie, why do girls always go to the bathroom in groups?โ I realized then that I was never going to have a moment of peace again.
***
โAll right, people, listen up. I need you to partner with two friends,โ said Mrs. Hanks.
I looked around the room, biting hard on my lip. We were starting a new group project in art class, and friends were a commodity I was currently lacking. Chairs scraped across the floor, and everyone moved toward someone they knew. Knowing that no one was going to want to partner with me, I stayed in my spot, wondering which unlucky group the teacher would stick me with. I noticed the redheaded girl from the day before as she stood and made her way across the room. When she waved, it took me a second to realize that she was waving at me. I lifted my hand in a small greeting as she came to a stop at my table.
โHowdy, Jackie. My nameโs Riley,โ she said in a thick Southern accent. โWould you like to join my group?โ
โYou know my name?โ I asked in surprise.
She smiled. โEveryone knows your name. Youโre the new girl who sat with Cole Walter on her first day here.โ Riley pulled out the chair across from me and sat down. โSo how about it? Partners?โ
Thank you, Cole Walter!ย Apparently he was useful for something other than making me feel nervous. โYes, please. I was thinking I might have to work alone.โ
โOh, donโt be silly. Heather and I never wouldโve left you by your lonesome,โ Riley said, mentioning a girl I had yet to see. โSheโll be joining us soon. Probably late because sheโs flirting in the halls.โ
On cue, a girl with long sandy hair twisted up in a bun hurried into the room and headed straight for Riley.
โYou will never believe what I just found out,โ she exclaimed, pulling out the chair next to her friend. โYou know that new girl Jackie who was sitting with Cole the other day? Apparently her dad was some New York businessman worth billions and her mother was a famous fashion designer. Her whole family just died in a car accidentโโ
โHeather?โ Riley hissed, trying to cut her off.
โโand there was a whole article about it on that one gossip website I like. You know, the one that posted nude pictures of that hot British actor I was telling you about? Anyway, can you imagine being that rich?โ
โHeather!โ Riley said again, this time with more force. She pointed in my direction.
Heather followed Rileyโs finger with her eyes. โHoly heck,โ she said when she noticed me.
โWhat she means is, โSorry,โโ Riley said, giving her friend a look. When Heather said nothing, Riley elbowed her in the side.
โOh, right! Iโm super sorry. That was so tactless of me. I didnโt realize you were sitting there.โ Heather didnโt look the least bit sorry. Her lips twitched as she tried to contain a smile that was threatening to break across her face. Instead of embarrassed, she looked thrilled to see me.
โItโs fine,โ I responded, my shoulders stiffening.
A minute of uncomfortable silence passed as Heather danced on the edge of her seat. The girl looked like she was about to explode, and finally she couldnโt contain her questions any longer.
โSo how do you know Cole? Are you related or something?โ The words burst from her mouth, the last part sounding hopeful.
โNo, we just met a few days ago.โ
โAnd he just invited you to sit with him?โ Heatherโs forehead crinkled in disbelief.
โYes.โ
โUgh, Iโm so jealous.โ
โWhy would you be jealous?โ
โBecause,โ Heather said, rolling her eyes, โCole doesnโt let just any girl sit with him at lunch. Only girls heโsย interestedย in.โ
Cole was the furthest thing from being interested in me. In the parking lot this morning, heโd snatched Olivia by the waist and swirled her around before dipping down into a kiss. Nothing says โI want youโ like being romantic with another girl, right? But then Nathanโs words came back to me in a rush, about how Cole liked to bounce from girl to girl. I laughed nervously. โYouโre wrong. Heโs just being nice.โ
โOh my lord, you are so toast,โ Riley said, sounding sympathetic as she shook her head. โCole Walter doesnโt do nice unless heโs getting something out of it. Thatโs boyโs gonna eat you alive, and you wonโt see it coming.โ
โI wouldnโt mind if he ate me alive,โ Heather said, her eyebrows waggling.
โWould you keep your dirty thoughts to yourself?โ Riley wrinkled her nose in disgust. She turned back to me. โJackie, you should sit with us at lunch today. Weโll fill you in on everything you need to know โbout that boy.โ
I nodded eagerly. Riley was sweet, and I could use as much education as possible about Cole Water if I was going to figure him out. On top of that, it was the perfect excuse to avoid Erin and her hateful glares. โThat sounds great.โ
Heather squealed and clapped her hands. As brazen as she was, I decided I liked her. She reminded me a bit of Sammy and somehow that made me relax, even though I wasnโt completely comfortable.
โPerfect,โ Riley said, leaning forward on the table. โI canโt wait.โ
***
Just like the day before, Cole walked me to the cafeteria after math class. This time when we reached the front of the lunch line, I grabbed my own tray. After paying for my food, I stood on my tiptoes, scanning the tables for Riley, and finally spotted a flash of bright red hair.
I started off in her direction, but Cole reached out and grabbed my shoulder. โHey, where you going, Jackie? The table is this way.โ He pointed to where we sat yesterday, and I noticed Erin watching me.
โSorry, Cole. I promised my new friend Riley that I would sit with her.โ Cole hesitated, almost as if he was surprised. โOkay then, Miss Popular,
but you have to promise youโll join me tomorrow.โ โMaybe I can pencil you in,โ I joked.
โFine,โ he said, laughing. โAt least let me walk you to your table.โ โSure.โ
I led the way through the crowded room, Cole following me. The rows between the tables were so congested that sometimes Coleโs elbow bumped into mine as people shoved by us, sending goose bumps up my arm.
โHey, girls,โ I said and set down my tray. Riley and Heather both stared up at Cole without responding.
โSee you after school, New York,โ Cole told me. He nodded in Riley and Heatherโs direction. โLadies.โ He flashed them a grin before walking away.
As soon as he was out of earshot, Riley began to babble. โOh, my word!
That boy just walked you to lunch. I canโt believe it.โ โCanโt believe what?โ I asked.
The two girls looked at me like I was clueless, which I probably was, but it was only my second day. They needed to give me a break.
โThe god of all guys is flirting with you,โ interjected a boy who appeared out of nowhere and dropped his tray on the table. โAnd not just casual flirting. More likeย I want you in my pantsย flirting.โ
The new boy was wearing a crisp blue shirt with a red bow tie. His flawless blond hair was combed to the side, and by flawless I mean like Fabio,ย Baywatch, or Ford models. โYou must be Jackie,โ he said. โIโm Skylar, Valley View Highโs fashion expert. I run the style blog for the school newspaper. If youโre interested in an editing position, Iโd love to work with you. Your East Coast look is so chic.โ
โWhat? No business card?โ Riley said, laughing.
Skylar rolled his eyes and turned to me. โShe loves making fun of me, but at least I donโt look like a hick,โ he mocked in a terrible Southern accent.
โWould you two stop?โ Heather said as she flipped the page of the
Peopleย magazine in front of her. โI wanna hear juicy details about Cole.โ Everyone turned to me.
โWhat?โ I asked, looking back at them. I hadnโt realized they were expecting something from me. I barely knew the guy.
โSo?โ asked Skylar. โWhat happened?โ
Why did everyone care so much about Cole? He was just one guy.
โHeโs in my class before lunch, so he walked me to the cafeteria,โ I responded, not knowing what else to tell them. I wasnโt good with all this boy gossip, and I could tell right away that Heather wasnโt happy with my answer.
โBut what did you guys talk about?โ she demanded. To show she was dedicated to the conversation, she pushed her magazine off to the side. โDid he compliment you? Maybe he touched your arm?โ
โAre you talking about Walterย again?โ asked another girl who plopped down onto the bench next to Skylar. โSorry Iโm late. I got caught up in the computer lab.โ
โThis is our pet nerd, Kim,โ Riley said, introducing her to me. Kim was a slender girl whose long, flowing hair and flawless skin reminded me of an
elf. โAs long as you donโt make fun of her little computer game or whatnot where she battles mythical creatures, she wonโt bite.โ
โItโs called a massively multiplayer online role-playing game, Riley.โ Kim flipped her hair over her shoulder. โBesides, I donโt battle mythical creatures. Iย amย a mythical creature. My avatar is a dwarf.โ
โAvatar?โ I couldnโt follow anything Kim was saying.
โItโs a graphic representation of my character, a reflection of my personal self,โ she explained for me, even though I didnโt understand a word. I wasnโt quite sure how a three-foot-tall creature could symbolize her tall, willowy frame, but I nodded my head like it made sense.
โHi, you must be Jackie.โ Kim extended a hand to me across the table. โWow, does everyone already know my name just because of Cole?โ I
asked.
She shook her head. โActually, Iโm a friend of Alex Walter. He mentioned you just moved in.โ
Heatherโs spoon fell from her hand. โWhat did you just say?โ
โThat Alex and I are friends? You already knew that,โ Kim said, frowning at Heather.
โNo, the other part,โ Heather said. Her spoon was back in her hand, and she was waving it wildly. โAbout moving in.โ
โOh,โ Kim said, pulling a soda out of her paper-bag lunch. โJackie just moved in with the Walters. Right, Jackie?โ
Three heads whipped around to look at me.
โUm, yes. I live with them,โ I said uneasily, afraid of how the group would react.
โHow in heavenโs name did you forget to mention something like that?โ Riley gasped, her mouth hanging open in surprise.
โOh my God!โ Heather squealed. โYou are like the luckiest girl in this whole school.โ
โDebatable,โ I mumbled to myself. What was so cool about living with a bunch of wild, crazy, childlike boys? Besides, itโs not like I wanted to be
living in Colorado. Had Heather already forgotten the gossip she told Riley about my familyโs accident?
โShe didย notย just say that!โ Heather cried, turning to Kim.
โJackie, Jackie, Jackie,โ Riley said, shaking her head. โHavenโt you noticed that the Walter boys are just perfect?โ
โNo, theyโre better than perfect. Theyโre gods,โ Heather said, dreamily staring off into space.
โThat did not just come out of your mouth,โ Kim scoffed. โThatโs so creepy.โ
โIs not! Itโs the truth. Jackie has crash-landed in boy heaven. I mean, think about it. It doesnโt matter what type of boy sheโs into because thereโs one of everything. First thereโs Danny, who has the whole mysterious brooding thing going on. Isaac is the classic, sexy bad boy. Next is Alex, your typical geeky, shy guy.โ Heather was ticking off the boys on her fingers. โNathan is the laid-back musician. Leeโs the edgy skater, and then thereโs Coleโthe golden boy.โ
Everyone sighed and nodded in agreement when she said his name.
โI donโt get it,โ I said, looking across the cafeteria to the table where Cole was eating his lunch. Erin was sitting in his lap and playing with his hair. โThere are plenty of guys who are good looking. What makes him so special?โ
โIf he isnโt so special, then why canโt you take your eyes off him?โ Skylar asked, his eyebrow arching up in question.
โI can too,โ I said, quickly looking away. โBesides, Iโm not looking for a boyfriend. I need to concentrate on my schoolwork.โ
The entire table started to laugh at me, and when they finally started to calm down, Skylar said, โSure, whatever.โ
โLook, Iโm just trying to understand it,โ I said, frustrated. If I could figure out what made Cole so special, then maybe I could eliminate the twisting in my stomach every time I saw him. โI mean, look at her. Whatย makesย her do that?โ I said and shook my head at Erin. She was diligently hand-feeding Cole grapes.
โThereโs just something about him,โ Heather said with a shrug, as if that explained everything. โSome extra aspect that no sane girl can ignore.โ
โWhat is it?โ
โYou canโt define it, Jackie.โ She leaned across the table toward me, hair spilling out in front of her as if she were revealing a trade secret. โItโs what I like to call the Cole effect.โ
โBut if everyone likes him, there has to be some common variable,โ I said, trying to think logically.
โThatโs my pointโthere isnโt! The fact that you canโt put your finger on it, whatever it is, is what makes him so swoon-worthy.โ
โThatโs ridiculous.โ
โAnd yet you feel it, donโt you?โ Heather said with a knowing smile. โDonโt feel embarrassed, Jackie,โ Riley said, and when I glanced at her a
little too sharply, she added, โWeโve all been swept away by a Cole Walter crush.โ
โI donโt like him,โ I said firmly, as everyone rolled their eyes. โIโll admit heโs attractive, but thatโs it. I hardly know him.โ
โDeny it all you want, girl,โ Riley said, putting a hand on my shoulder. โBut I know a lovesick puppy when I see one.โ
I wanted to argue again, to let Riley know that she was wrong. I knew I wasnโt lovesick, and yet I kept my mouth closed. The nausea burning inside my stomach held me back. Heather and Riley made it sound as if no girl had the ability to resist Cole, which made my lack of experience with boys that much more disconcerting.
How would I stand a chance? I couldnโt fall for him. Not after what Nathan told me, and especially not after what had happened to my family. It wouldnโt be right. It was too soon. I needed to do well in school so I could follow in my dadโs footsteps.
I couldnโt do that with a boy like Cole Walter distracting me.