Maya comes out of the office after five. There are only two other cars left in the lot, and Iโm guessing hers is the purple hatchback. I lurk next to it.
She stops short when she sees me. Her car key is sticking out from between two fingers, like they always say to do to ward off would-be rapists.
โLucy.โ It comes out as a gasp, like sheโs scared. She probably is, come to think of it.
I raise both my hands in surrender. โI just want to talk.โ
She squints at me. She was a teenager last time I saw herโeighteen, just graduating from high school and getting ready to leave for college.
โI shouldnโt have told her.โ I can still see Savvy sitting on her bed in her tiny apartment with the sloped ceilings. โFuck. Sheโs still a teenager, butโฆโ โYou were a teenager when you killed him?โ Iโd guessed, and sheโd
nodded, clearly relieved I understood.
Maya stares at me. She and Savvy never looked much alike. Mayaโs hair is lighter, the kind of blond that people usually have to buy from a bottle. Her features are sharper than Savvyโs wereโthe long nose and pointed chin are different from her sister. Sheโs wearing a full coral skirt and a button-up white blouse with a rounded collar. Itโs a sweet outfit. Savvy didnโt do sweet.
But the eyes are the same. Blue, furious. Sweat trickles down my back. โCan we go somewhere?โ I ask. โItโs hot out here.โ
โI donโt have anything to say to you.โ She presses the button to unlock her car.
โPlease, Mayaโฆโ I take a step forward but then trail off, because I donโt know how to start a conversation about this.
She glares at me. โLook, I know that everyone has decided youโre innocent now, but I still donโt want to talk to you.โ
Everyoneโs decided Iโm innocent? Thatโs news to me.
โItโs not that,โ I say. She opens her car door and throws her purse inside.
I say my next words in a rush. โI know about Troy.โ
She slides into her car seat, gathering her skirt up so it wonโt get caught in the door. โI donโt know who that is.โ
I grab the door before she can shut it. โThe man Savvy killed.โ
Her head snaps to me, her face draining of color. She stares at me for a minute.
โGet in the car.โ
Maya starts driving, and then seems to think better of taking me wherever she was originally thinking. She pulls into the parking lot of a long-deserted restaurant and parks beneath some trees.
โThat was his name?โ she asks. โTroy?โ
โYes. She didnโt tell you?โ I unbuckle my seat belt so I can face her. I canโt stop noticing how her white shirt is still pristine, even though itโs the end of the workday. I would have spilled my coffee and lunch on it by now.
She chews on her bottom lip and shakes her head. โAnd I didnโt ask. I donโt think I wanted to know.โ
Iโd wanted to know. I wanted to know his name and what he looked like and what blood smells like when thereโs that much of it.
Maya looks at me quickly. โDo you know his last name? Iโve always wondered if maybe someone knew that it was Savvy and theyโre the ones whoโโ She stops as I shake my head.
โTroy Henderson. I looked into it years ago. Hired a PI, actually.โ
I didnโt have the money for it back then, but it was my only solid lead, and I refused to tell the police about him. I wouldnโt betray Savvy like that.
โNothing?โ She already looks crushed.
โNo, Iโm sorry. His body still hasnโt been found. From what my PI gathered, heโd been known to get wasted and start fights with people. The case is still open, but I donโt think anyone is looking for him all that hard. When the PI talked to his sister, she didnโt even realize he was missing. She thought heโd moved away and never called.โ
โOh.โ
โIโm sorry. I should have told you earlier, butโฆโ But she was young, and starting her freshman year of college just having lost her sister. I didnโt want to pop up like,ย Hi! Remember how your dead big sister murdered someone?
โI wouldnโt have wanted to hear from you back then anyway.โ โDo you want to hear from meย now?โ
She cocks a blond eyebrow, almost amused. โGood point.โ โI can send you the stuff my PI found, if you want.โ
She leans back in her seat, blowing out a long breath. โYou really donโt remember that night, do you?โ
โNo.โ
โMy mom never believed you, but it doesnโt make much sense to hire a PI to investigate a lead if you killed her yourself.โ She turns to meet my eyes. โAnd then not even tell us about it. That was the best defense you had, you know. Her killing Troy.โ
โI know.โ
โWould you have told someone, if theyโd actually arrested and charged you with her murder?โ
I look out the window. โMaybe.โ I liked to think I wouldnโt have, but itโs possible that the prospect of a few decades behind bars would have broken my loyalty to Savvy.
I clear my throat and look at her. โAs far as I know, Savvy never told anyone except the two of us. Right?โ
โShe said that only you knew when she told me.โ
โIโm not telling Ben,โ I say. โJust so you know. No matter what happens, Iโm not telling him.โ
โYouโre really talking to that podcaster? Like, giving him an interview?โ
โYes. Weโve already started.โ
โWow.โ She stares out the front window. โI told him some stuff about Matt, but he said he cut it out.โ
โI know.โ
โYou know?โ
โHe asked me about it. I wouldnโt confirm it, so he cut it. Legal reasons, I think.โ I have no idea whether thatโs true, but it sounds true. โMattโs already threatened to sue him.โ
โIโm sorry. I shouldnโt have said it. I regretted it after we hung up.โ
I shrug. I wish she hadnโt, but I canโt bring myself to be mad about it. โIโm glad you said something about Savvy and Matt. Youโre right that she never would have slept with him.โ
She shudders, like just the thought of it grosses her out.
โI just wanted to make sure that we were on the same page,โ I say. โAbout never telling anyone about Troy. Ever.โ
โWeโre on the same page.โ
She reaches for the shifter and then stops, pulling her hand back and meeting my gaze again. โI wish sheโd told me that you knew too.โ
โWhy?โ
โBecause I thought that you didnโt really know her. Most people didnโt really know Savvy.โ
โNo, they didnโt.โ
โI should have guessed, though. You were different than her other friends. She stopped hating Plumpton so much after you moved back. She was happier.โ
I swallow around the lump in my throat. I knew this, but it feels different, coming from Maya. Like itโs actually true, and not just a wild hope. I have to close my eyes and take a breath, because for a moment I miss Savvy so much that it physically hurts.
โI was happier too,โ I say quietly.
I look up at Maya to see her roughly wiping away tears. We share a sad smile.
She clears her throat and throws the car in reverse. โPromise me youโll do everything you can to catch the asshole who did it, okay? Savvy deserves that much.โ
โI promise.โ





