After Thanksgiving, the year passed in the blink of an eye. Iโd like to say my first holiday season as an engaged woman was special or memorable, but it was more stressful than anything else.
The weeks between Black Friday and New Yearโs Eve were packed with work, social obligations, and endless questions about my upcoming wedding. Dante and I stayed overnight at my parentsโ house for Christmas, and it was just as awkward as Iโd feared.
โIf Mom fusses any more over him, people will thinkย sheโsย the one marrying him,โ my sister Agnes whispered as our mother plied Dante with another drink.
We only called her Mom to each other and never to her face.
โImagine Father negotiatingย thatย arrangement,โ I whispered back. We burst into giggles.
We were in the living room after our Christmas Eve dinnerโmy mother and Dante by the fireplace; my sister and me on the couch, and my father and Gunnar, Agnesโs husband, on the other couch by the bar.
I didnโt see Agnes much now that she lived in Eldorra, but whenever we were together, we reverted to being teenagers again.
โGirls, want to share whatโs so funny?โ our father asked pointedly, looking up from his conversation with Gunnar.
Tall, blond, and blue-eyed, Gunnar was my sisterโs polar opposite looks-wise, but they shared a similar sense of humor and easygoing manner. He watched, his expression amused, as my sister and I sobered.
โNothingโs funny,โ we said in unison.
My father shook his head with an exasperated expression. โVivian, put your jacket back on,โ he said. โItโs freezing. Youโll get sick.โ
โItโs notย thatย cold,โ I protested. โThe fireplace is on.โ But I put the jacket on anyway.
Besides marriage, my parents were forever fussing at me about wearing enough layers and drinking enough soup. It was one of the few holdovers from our pre-wealth days.
When I looked over at Dante, I found him watching us with narrowed eyes. I raised an eyebrow, and he gave a small shake of his head.
I had no clue what that meant, but my curiosity over his reaction melted in the whirlwind of Christmas morning (where Gunnar announced he bought Agnes another pony for their country manor) and the Legacy Ball and wedding planning that dominated the weeksย afterย New Yearโs.
Before I knew it, it was mid-January, and my anxiety had peaked to an all-time high.
T-minus four months until the ball.
T-minus seven months until the wedding. God help me.
โYou need a spa retreat,โ Isabella said. โNothing restores the body like a weekend in the desert filled with deep-tissue massages and yoga.โ
โYou hate yoga, and you once left a retreat early because it was too โboring and woo woo.โโ
โForย me. Not for you.โ Isabella lay stomach-down on my office couch, her feet kicked up in the air as she scribbled in her notebook. Occasionally,
a.k.a. every two minutes, sheโd stop to sip her soda or nibble on a piece of dark chocolate. It was lunchtime, but she said she wasnโt that hungry, and I
hadnโt had a chance to order takeout. โYou should take Dante with you. Itโll be a couplesโ getaway.โ
I looked up from the Legacy Ball seating chart. โArenโt you supposed to be writing the next great thriller instead of providing unsolicited advice on my love life?โ
Sometimes, Isabella used my office as her office because the silence in her apartment was โtoo loud,โ which I was fine with as long as she didnโt distract me while I was working.
โIโm drawing inspiration from real life. Perhaps I can write about an arranged marriage gone terribly wrong. The wife murders her husband after having a kinky affair with her sexy doormanโฆor not,โ she added hastily when I glared at her. โBut you have to admit, sex and murder go hand in hand.โ
โOnly to you.โ I moved the sticky notes with Dominic and Alessandra Davenportโs names to the table with Kai.ย Much better. The last setup had Dominic sitting next to his biggest rival. โShould I worry about your exes?โ
โOnly the ones that pissed me off.โ โThatโs all of them.โ
โIs it?โ Isabella was the picture of innocence. โOops.โ
A smile pulled on my lips. Her dating history was a string of red flags encompassing race car drivers, photographers, models, and, in one truly spectacular lapse of judgment, an aspiring poet with a Shakespeare tattoo and a penchant for spouting lines fromย Romeo and Julietย during sex.
The past year had been her longest break from men since I met her. She deserved it.
Dealing with men was exhausting.
Case in point: my relationship with Dante. Trying to figure out where we stood was like trying to find my footing on a slab of particle board in the middle of the ocean.
Isabella and I lapsed into silence again, but my mind kept straying toward a certain dark-haired Italian.
Weโd kissed, and Dante had given me not one butย twoย mind-blowing orgasms, only to shut down immediately after.
Nothing beat the humiliation of asking him for sex only for him to leave me high and dry. At least Iโd successfully (I hoped) played the entire night off as a mistake.
A knock interrupted my inner turmoil. โCome in.โ
Shannon entered holding an extravagant bouquet of red roses. There mustโve been at least two dozen of them slotted into a slim crystal vase, and their scent instantly blanketed the room with cloying sweetness.
Isabella sat up, her eyes gleaming like a Page Six reporter whoโd stumbled on a juicy society secret.
โThese just came for you,โ Shannon said with a knowing smile. โWhere do you want me to put them?โ
My heart leapt in my throat. โMy desk is fine. Thank you.โ
โOh my God.โ Isabella beelined to my desk the second the door closed. โThese roses mustโve cost hundreds of dollars. Whatโs the occasion?โ
โI have no idea,โ I admitted. Surprise and pleasure warred for dominance in my chest.
Dante had never sent me flowers before. Our relationship had smoothed into one of civil cohabitation and the occasional shared late-night snack since Bali, but we still werenโt a โnormalโ couple by any means.
I couldnโt imagine why heโd be sending me roses now. It wasnโt a holiday, anniversary, or anyoneโs birthday.
โJust becauseย flowers. The best kind.โ Isabella skimmed her fingers over a velvety petal. โWho knew Dante Russo was such a romantic?โ
The pleasure edged out the surprise.
I searched the extravagant blooms until I found a tiny card with my name written on the front. I flipped it over, and my stomach plummeted.
โItโs not from Dante.โ
โThen whoโs itโฆoh.โ Isabellaโs eyes widened when I showed her the note.
Vivian,
Happy belated new year. I thought of you at midnight but didnโt have the guts to send you this until now. Hope youโre doing well.
Love, Heath.
P.S. Iโm here if you ever change your mind.
A cocktail of disappointment, unease, and confusion brewed in my stomach. Save for aย Merry Christmasย text, I hadnโt talked to Heath since the flea market. His sending me flowers made even less sense than Dante sending them.
โLove, Heath.โ Isabella wrinkled her nose. โFirst, he shows up in New York andย coincidentallyย runs into you, now this. Man needs to move on. Youโve been broken up for years, and youโโ
โWhoโs Heath?โ The black velvet voice wrenched my gaze to the entrance.
Charcoal suit. Broad shoulders. Expression as dark as his voice. My pulse skittered into overdrive.
Dante stood in the doorway, brown paper bag in hand, his eyes glinting like shards of volcanic glass against the soft roses.
His body held dangerously still, like the calm before a storm.
โUmโฆโ I slid a panicked look at Isabella, who hopped off the desk and scooped her bag up from the floor.
โWell, this was fun, but I gotta go,โ she chirped in an overly bright voice. โMonty gets cranky if I donโt feed him on time.โ
Traitor,ย my glare screamed.
Sorry,ย she mouthed.ย Good luck.
I was never letting her work in my office again.
She brushed past Dante with an awkward pat on his arm, and I watched, stomach twisting, as he walked toward me and set the paper bag next to the bouquet.
He flipped the note and read it wordlessly, his jaw ticking in rhythm with each passing second.
โItโs a New Yearโs gift,โ I said when the silence became too oppressive to bear. โLike the champagne glasses my mom bought us.โ
Tick. Tick. Tick.
I hadnโt cheated on Dante or purposely sought out Heath myself. I had nothing to feel guilty about.
Still, my nerves rattled like wind chimes in a tornado.
โThese arenโt champagne glasses,ย mia cara.โ Dante dropped the note the way one would a diseased carcass. โNor are they from your mother, which brings me back to my question. Who is Heath?โ
I inhaled a soft breath for courage. โMy ex-boyfriend.โ Danteโs eyes sparked. โYour ex-boyfriend.โ
โYes.โ I didnโt want to lie, and Dante could probably find out who Heath was with the snap of a finger, anyway.
โWhy is your ex-boyfriend sending you roses and love notes?โ The velvety tone didnโt change, but the undercurrent of danger rippled closer to the surface.
โItโs not a love note.โ
โIt damn well looks like one to me.โ If Dante ground his teeth any harder, theyโd crumble into dust. โWhat does he mean by change your mind?โ
โI told him about our engagement a few months ago.โ If I was telling the truth, I might as well tell the whole truth. โHe showed up in New York and implied heโd be open to giving our relationship another shot. I declined. He left. The end.โ
Danteโs eyes were near-black now. โObviously not the end, given this
lovelyย bouquet he sent you.โ
โItโs just flowers.โ I understood why he was upset, but he was making it into something bigger than it was. โTheyโre harmless.โ
โSome fucker is sending you flowers, and you want to tell me itโs harmless?โ He picked up the card again. โThought of you at midnight. Hope youโre doing well. Love, Heath.โ Sarcasm weighed heavy on the recitation. โIt doesnโt take a genius to know what he was doing while he was thinking of you at midnight.โ
Frustration overrode my misplaced guilt. โI canโt control what other people do or say. I told him I wasnโt interested in getting back together, and Iโll tell him again if he persists. What do you want me to do? Get a restraining order against him?โ
โNow thatโs an excellent idea.โ โThatโs aย ridiculousย idea.โ โDo you still love him?โ
The question came from so out of left field I could only gape at him until I rustled up the only word I could find. โWhat?โ
โDo you stillย loveย him?โ The ticking jaw returned with vengeance. โWe broke up years ago.โ
โThat doesnโt answer my question.โ
I shifted beneath Danteโs heavy stare.
Did I still love Heath? I cared for him, and I missed the easy rapport we had. Our breakup had devastated me.
But I wasnโt the same person Iโd been when we were dating, and time had dulled my heartbreak into a distant echo of what it once was.
When I thought of Heath, I thought of the comfort of being loved. I didnโt necessarily think ofย him.
But if I didnโtย haveย to marry Dante, and I could go back to Heath without alienating my parents, would I do it?
My head pounded with indecision.
โIt doesnโt matter,โ I finally said. โIโm engaged to you, and Iโm not getting back together with Heath.โ
My answer only stoked the fire in Danteโs eyes. โI wonโt have my fiancรฉe pining away after another man before, during, or after the wedding.โ
โWhy does it matter?โ My frustration bubbled over into a rush of words. โYouโll get your market access and business deal either way. Stop pretending like this is a normal engagement. Itโs not. We may have kissed andโฆand gotten more intimate, but we areย notย a love match. Youโve told me that time and again. You have me. But you donโt get to dictate how I feel or who I think about. That isย notย part of the agreement.โ
Silence reigned in the aftermath of my rant, so thick I tasted it in the back of my throat.
Dante and I stared at each other, the air crackling like a frayed electric wire between us.
One wrong move, and itโll burn me alive.
I braced myself for an explosion or yelling or some kind of veiled threat.
Instead, after seconds that felt like hours, he turned and walked out without a word.
The door shut behind him, and I slumped against my desk, suddenly exhausted. I pressed the heels of my hands against my eyes, my throat tight.
Every time we made progress, we took two steps back.
One minute, I thought Dante might be developing feelings for me. The next, he shut me out like an unwanted stepchild in the cold.
The caveman in Geicoโs old commercials communicated better than him.
What had he been doing here anyway? Danteโs office was a few blocks from mine, but heโd never visited me at work before.
My eyes snagged on the paper bag heโd left behind.
After a momentโs hesitation, I opened it, and my stomach dipped in the strangest way.
Sitting at the bottom of the bag, nestled between paper-wrapped cutlery and a plethora of sauces, were two takeout boxes from my favorite sushi restaurant.