I knock on the door to the Annexe but wait until I’m invited in. Mia opens it; Sonny’s head rests on her shoulder. At face value, this looks perfectly normal. But she can’t fool me. Her posture is statue-stiff, as if it’s the first time she’s ever held a baby and she’s frightened she might drop him.
Finn told me last night Mia thinks Dave’s been keeping secrets about that house and she’s been poking around our garage. It’s time for me to take charge of the situation before it escalates.
‘How are you?’ I ask. ‘I’ve not seen either of you much the last couple of days.’
‘We’re okay,’ she says.
‘Are you sleeping any better?’ ‘A little.’
The bags under her eyes tell a different story. ‘Can we talk?’
She invites me to sit on the sofa opposite her. I spot pillows and a folded duvet on the floor and I feel for my poor son, kicked out of his own bedroom.
‘Has Finn asked you to come?’ She can’t hide the anxiety in her voice.
‘No, but he’s told me you two are going through a difficult patch and about your doubts over Dave.’ Her face reddens. ‘Finn is worried about you, Mia, as we all are.’
‘I’m getting better.’
‘But you’re not, are you, darling? With the greatest respect, you can’t kid a kidder. You may have your baby in your arms, but he’s not in your heart, is he?’
‘I love him,’ she protests and clutches him like an expensive handbag.
‘But is that enough? Finn told me you left Sonny in the kitchen unattended yesterday while you were in our garage trying to disprove what Dave told you. Why would you do that to your child?’
‘I was only next door.’
‘Mia, he is so low down your list of priorities that you forgot him. Can you not see that isn’t normal behaviour for a new mum? He’s supposed to be your life. Perhaps we expected too much of you . . .’ I turn away and shake my head as if it’s my fault.
She knows I’m right, I can sense it, but she isn’t ready to admit it. I turn back around to face her. ‘I hoped I was helping you out by taking care of Sonny when you were struggling, and that you and I had drawn a line under the way things once were between us. But it feels like Dave and I have done something to upset you. Nobody is keeping secrets from you, Mia. Ask me anything and maybe we can put this behind us.’
She’s hesitant. With her free hand she rubs her fingers together.
‘Did . . . did Dave tell you the truth about going to school with one of the kids in our house, and her friend?’
‘Of course he did. He’s my husband. We tell each other everything.’
‘They why didn’t either of you mention it to us or the police?’
‘Tell me one good thing that has come out of you learning about this.’
‘It was our house. We had a right to know.’
‘Dave didn’t tell you because it bears no relevance to anything that’s happened in the past or present. And we
were concerned that in your current mindset, you might read more into it than there is. And we were right. Let me tell you something, Mia, that you might not know. My husband didn’t have the world handed to him on a plate. Neither of us was born with a silver spoon in our mouths like you were. We had to work hard for everything we have. He had a terrible childhood so of course he doesn’t want to be reminded of it. In the end, Dave went against the low expectations of him to become who he is now. My husband is a proud man, a devoted dad and a wonderful grandfather, but he is ashamed of what he was. It’s hurtful when you rake up the past and accuse him of God knows what.’
‘The skirting board . . .’ she says, more quietly this time. ‘It was his writing. I’m sure of it.’
‘He’s dyslexic. His handwriting looked like that of a much younger child’s back then, so it could easily have belonged to one of those seven children in the attic. I’ll say this once and once only: I swear on Finn’s life that Dave never set foot in that house before you bought it. I’m begging you to stop this vendetta against him. There’s enough pressure on this family already without you making everyone’s lives more miserable. May I offer you some advice, woman to woman? Perhaps you should pay more attention to your marriage instead of coming up with these silly accusations. Dave and Finn are working their fingers to the bone to provide for us while you’re busy searching for trouble where there is no trouble.’
Now Mia’s face is filled with doubt. She looks away but not quickly enough for me not to witness her shame. I need to take advantage of the moment. ‘What do you want from us, Mia?’ I ask gently. ‘We love you but it’s clear that’s not reciprocated by you. You took the house we wanted from under our noses and I didn’t complain. You don’t like living with us but you didn’t care to accept our offer to help you buy somewhere else. I’m at a loss to know what else we can
do. I know that we can’t all go on living like this. So what will it take to make you happy?’
She hesitates before she whispers, ‘I don’t know.’
I have her on the ropes. I have waited months, years in fact, to have this conversation. ‘Our offer still stands,’ I say. ‘We can remortgage the house to help you find somewhere of your own.’
‘We can’t take that money from you.’
‘I think you’ll admit, things have changed for us all. So we aren’t offering it to you both any more. We are offering it to you only.’ Her eyebrows knit. ‘We will give you every penny of that money to buy yourself somewhere new. But it’s on the condition that you leave my son and your marriage.’
‘What?’ she asks, thinking she’s misheard or misunderstood me.
‘I want you to leave Finn.’ I place my hand gently on her forearm. ‘I’m sorry to say it, but you bring nothing but unhappiness here. You are like a cancer in our family, Mia, eating away at us. Finn would be much happier if he had the chance to start afresh. I want nothing but the best for him, and the best does not involve you. So I’m begging you to take the money, move away and start again.’
A period of stunned silence follows before she speaks again. ‘You are so desperate for us to split up that you’d pay me off?’
‘I’m doing this for my own family, which you could have been a part of but have rejected every step of the way. If you knew anything about motherhood, you’d understand why I’m trying to protect my boys.’
‘What does Dave say about this?’
‘He is behind me one hundred per cent,’ I lie. This is my own idea.
‘And Finn? What’s he going to say when I tell him?’
‘I know my son better than you know your husband. In the end, he’ll understand this is for the best.’
‘You are unbelievable.’ Mia rises to her feet still clutching Sonny and turns her back to me. I spot tufts of Sonny’s dark hair and I’m desperate to feel them against my fingers. ‘You pretend to be my friend when all you want is to control us all.’
‘I might be unbelievable, but you haven’t turned me down, have you? You haven’t said no.’
She opens her mouth but she is unable to find the words. And in that moment, I realise that she is actually considering this. It was a long shot, but now I’m wondering if my plan just might work. I try to contain my excitement.
‘Just take it, Mia,’ I press. ‘Admit it, you hate it here. You think you can do better than Finn and us. You’re never going to like me, and Finn is never going to choose you over us. So this vicious circle of you and I trading blows is going to continue forever, if you let it. I’m giving you the power to change it all. Think about your old life in London – your friends, the buzz you got out of living and working there. You could use our money as a deposit on a flat. Start going back to your glamorous parties and celebrity clients. Be honest with yourself: you miss it all, don’t you? So why not make it easy on yourself – on all of us – and leave?’
Now she is facing me. ‘Just like that?’
‘Just like that. We are perfectly capable of muddling on without you. We did it before you arrived and we can do it again. And when he’s older, Sonny will understand.’
‘Understand what?’
‘Understand why his mum left him with his dad.’ ‘What did you say?’
‘You don’t expect us to let you take him with you, do you? Part of the condition of you moving away is that you leave my grandson behind.’
