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Chapter no 30

Ignite Me (Shatter Me Book 3)

Warner still hasnโ€™t said a single word to me.

Weโ€™re in his room now, courtesy of Delalieu, who Warner was quick to dismiss. It feels strange and familiar to be back here, in this room that Iโ€™ve found both fear and comfort in.

Now it feels right to me.

This is Warnerโ€™s room. And Warner, to me, is no longer something to be afraid of.

These past few months have transformed him in my eyes, and these past two days have been full of revelations that Iโ€™m still recovering from. I canโ€™t deny that he seems different to me now.

I feel like I understand him in a way I never did before.

Heโ€™s like a terrified, tortured animal. A creature who spent his whole life being beaten, abused, and caged away. He was forced into a life he never asked for, and was never given an opportunity to choose anything else. And though heโ€™s been given all the tools to kill a person, heโ€™s too emotionally tortured to be able to use those skills against his own fatherโ€” the very man who taught him to be a murderer. Because somehow, in some strange, inexplicable way, he still wants his father to love him.

And I understand that. I really, really do.

โ€œWhat happened?โ€ Warner finally says to me.

Iโ€™m sitting on his bed; heโ€™s standing by the door, staring at the wall. โ€œWhat do you mean?โ€

โ€œWith Kent,โ€ he says. โ€œEarlier. What did he say to you?โ€ โ€œOh.โ€ I flush. Embarrassed. โ€œHe kicked me out of his house.โ€ โ€œBut why?โ€

โ€œHe was mad,โ€ I explain. โ€œThat I was defending you. That Iโ€™d invited you to come back at all.โ€

โ€œOh.โ€

I can almost hear our hearts beat in the silence between us. โ€œYou were defending me,โ€ Warner finally says.

โ€œYes.โ€

He says nothing.

I say nothing.

โ€œSo he told you to leave,โ€ Warner says, โ€œbecause you were defending me.โ€

โ€œYes.โ€

โ€œIs that all?โ€

My heart is racing. Iโ€™m suddenly nervous. โ€œNo.โ€ โ€œThere were other things?โ€

โ€œYes.โ€

Warner blinks at the wall. Unmoving. โ€œReally.โ€ I nod.

He says nothing.

โ€œHe was upset,โ€ I whisper, โ€œbecause I didnโ€™t agree that you were crazy.

And he was accusing meโ€โ€”I hesitateโ€”โ€œof being in love with you.โ€ Warner exhales sharply. Touches a hand to the doorframe.

My heart is pounding so hard.

Warnerโ€™s eyes are glued to the wall. โ€œAnd you told him he was an idiot.โ€

Breathe. โ€œNo.โ€

Warner turns, just halfway. I see his profile, the unsteady rise and fall of his chest. Heโ€™s staring directly at the door now, and itโ€™s clear itโ€™s costing him a great deal of effort to speak. โ€œThen you told him he was crazy. You told him he had to be out of his mind to say something like that.โ€

โ€œNo.โ€

โ€œNo,โ€ he echoes.

I try not to move.

Warner takes a hard, shaky breath. โ€œThen what did you say to him?โ€ Seven seconds die between us.

โ€œNothing,โ€ I whisper. Warner stills.

I donโ€™t breathe.

No one speaks for what feels like forever.

โ€œOf course,โ€ Warner finally says. He looks pale, unsteady. โ€œYou said nothing. Of course.โ€

โ€œAaronโ€”โ€ I get to my feet.

โ€œThere are a lot of things I have to do before tomorrow,โ€ he says. โ€œEspecially if your friends will be joining us on base.โ€ His hands tremble in the second it takes him to reach for the door. โ€œForgive me,โ€ he says. โ€œBut I have to go.โ€

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