Warner still hasnโt said a single word to me.
Weโre in his room now, courtesy of Delalieu, who Warner was quick to dismiss. It feels strange and familiar to be back here, in this room that Iโve found both fear and comfort in.
Now it feels right to me.
This is Warnerโs room. And Warner, to me, is no longer something to be afraid of.
These past few months have transformed him in my eyes, and these past two days have been full of revelations that Iโm still recovering from. I canโt deny that he seems different to me now.
I feel like I understand him in a way I never did before.
Heโs like a terrified, tortured animal. A creature who spent his whole life being beaten, abused, and caged away. He was forced into a life he never asked for, and was never given an opportunity to choose anything else. And though heโs been given all the tools to kill a person, heโs too emotionally tortured to be able to use those skills against his own fatherโ the very man who taught him to be a murderer. Because somehow, in some strange, inexplicable way, he still wants his father to love him.
And I understand that. I really, really do.
โWhat happened?โ Warner finally says to me.
Iโm sitting on his bed; heโs standing by the door, staring at the wall. โWhat do you mean?โ
โWith Kent,โ he says. โEarlier. What did he say to you?โ โOh.โ I flush. Embarrassed. โHe kicked me out of his house.โ โBut why?โ
โHe was mad,โ I explain. โThat I was defending you. That Iโd invited you to come back at all.โ
โOh.โ
I can almost hear our hearts beat in the silence between us. โYou were defending me,โ Warner finally says.
โYes.โ
He says nothing.
I say nothing.
โSo he told you to leave,โ Warner says, โbecause you were defending me.โ
โYes.โ
โIs that all?โ
My heart is racing. Iโm suddenly nervous. โNo.โ โThere were other things?โ
โYes.โ
Warner blinks at the wall. Unmoving. โReally.โ I nod.
He says nothing.
โHe was upset,โ I whisper, โbecause I didnโt agree that you were crazy.
And he was accusing meโโI hesitateโโof being in love with you.โ Warner exhales sharply. Touches a hand to the doorframe.
My heart is pounding so hard.
Warnerโs eyes are glued to the wall. โAnd you told him he was an idiot.โ
Breathe. โNo.โ
Warner turns, just halfway. I see his profile, the unsteady rise and fall of his chest. Heโs staring directly at the door now, and itโs clear itโs costing him a great deal of effort to speak. โThen you told him he was crazy. You told him he had to be out of his mind to say something like that.โ
โNo.โ
โNo,โ he echoes.
I try not to move.
Warner takes a hard, shaky breath. โThen what did you say to him?โ Seven seconds die between us.
โNothing,โ I whisper. Warner stills.
I donโt breathe.
No one speaks for what feels like forever.
โOf course,โ Warner finally says. He looks pale, unsteady. โYou said nothing. Of course.โ
โAaronโโ I get to my feet.
โThere are a lot of things I have to do before tomorrow,โ he says. โEspecially if your friends will be joining us on base.โ His hands tremble in the second it takes him to reach for the door. โForgive me,โ he says. โBut I have to go.โ