THE DARKNESSย in the back of this Uber is giving me more confidence than it should.
Maybe itโs the alcohol, maybe itโs the post-qualifying high, maybe itโs the way Nathanโs body responds to mine, and how heโs practically dicking down my ego by telling me Iโm the hottest thing heโs ever seen in his life.
His hand is about an inch away from making this journey home more interesting, but I tried to avoid this, in my defense. I tried to sit with Henry, whom I knew would go entirely out of his way to ensure our bodies touched as little as possible.
Shit, he probably would have forced me to sit on the floor of the passenger seat, and Iโd have been good with it. But now, I find myself dealing with the consequences of my actions, with no one to blame for my aching, wet vagina but myself.
My traitorous hips are moving of their own accord, a desperate whimper slipping from my parted lips as Nate slowly and deliberately rolls his hips forward, hand still interlocked with mine between my legs.
His other hand leaves my thigh, and my arm instinctively raises to sink my fingers into his thick, dark hair. My breathing slows as he presses his palm flat to my body and travels across my stomach, over the curve of my breast, circling my nipple but not quite adding enough pressure for me to be satisfied.
โNathanโฆโ I whimper impatiently. His chuckle is dark and devious, telling me with no words that he does not give one fuck about doing what I want. His hand moves across to my other breast, the same frustrating light
touch that has me arching into his hand just to feel more. โNathan, pleaseโฆโ
I tug with the hand still gripping his hair, trying to ignore the goose bumps spreading across my skin every time his hot breath dances across my neck.
His fingers finally pinch my taut nipples, nose nudging my head to the side, the stubble covering his jaw scraping over my hammering pulse, teeth nipping the lobe of my ear. โYou only like me when youโre drunk and horny.โ
โNot true.โ I finally let go of the hand settled between my legs, leaving his there as he strokes against the inside of my thigh gently. I twist to watch him over my shoulder, his eyes dark and heavy as they meet mine. โI donโt like you at any time.โ
Lips crash into mine and his hand moves to grip the front of my throat. Itโs rough and passionate, overwhelming and heated, and a whole host of other words my brain canโt even process right now. He squeezes my throat as his tongue explores my mouth, moaning when my teeth sink into his lip.
Itโs not enough; I want him closer, need him closer. He loosens his grip, trailing his mouth across my jaw, kissing and sucking my neck, voice rough as I roll my hips against him. โDonโt tell me you donโt like me when I can feel how wet you are all over your thighs, Anastasia.โ
โItโd be all over your hand instead if you didย something.โ
Iโm incredibly close to taking matters into my own hands, although Iโm unsure where masturbating in his lap would put us on the frenemy-ship scale. A normal person would be worried about their audience, but I could scream until the windows shattered and our exceptionally drunk friends wouldnโt notice. Drunkenness aside, Taylor Swiftโs โCruel Summerโ came on the radio, and Kris turned it to full volume.
Weโre in our own little world back here; the temperature is hotter, the air thicker, tension stealing every last bit of oxygen from my lungs.
I couldnโt even tell you how far away from Maple Hills we are or how many minutes have passed since I climbed in here and settled on Nateโs lap. His knees nudge mine farther apart, mouth descending on mine again, more possessive, more dominant. His nose brushes mine. โCan you be a good girl and be quiet?โ
I nod, prepared to finally feel his long, thick fingers easing the throbbing between my legs. Instead, he drags one finger gently over my
swollen clit, and I canโt help the huff of frustration that escapes me. โIโm so close to doing it myself. Tell me if you donโt know what youโre doing, Nathan.โ
The last time I goaded him about not being able to pleasure a woman, he proved me very, very wrong.
His free hand sinks into the hair at the bottom of my neck, tugging so I look up at him. He increases the pressure on my clit and a satisfied moan grumbles in my throat, jaw slacking as the pleasure rolls through my very tense and sexually frustrated body.
Swapping to the heel of his palm, his other hand tightens in my hair. โOne day, Iโm going to fuck your pretty little mouth, and youโre not going to be able to be such a bossy, impatient little brat.โ
He covers my mouth with his, absorbing my satisfied moan as two fingers slide into me, deliciously stretching me.
I shouldnโt have promised to be quiet.
The slick, wet noise of Nateโs fingers pumping in and out of me would be enough for everyone to know without me even saying a word. The music is still blasting, our friends paying attention to anything but us, and the familiar red-hot pleasure shoots up my spine.
โYour pussy is so perfect,โ he rasps into my ear. โSo wet and tight.โ
My hips are bucking against his hand, incoherent pleads and moans slipping from my lips. My knees try to close, my body trying to shy away from the building feeling in my core.
He pins my legs open with his, and Iโm about to fall headfirst into oblivion. โYou gonna come for me? Come all over my fingers, Anastasia, show me what itโs gonna feel like when Iโve got my dick buried inside of you.โ
Releasing my hair, his hand clamps over my mouth to smother my cries as the orgas*m rips through me, and I give being so loud the windows shatter my best attempt.
Every bit of me is physically shaking, pleasure spreading through my entire body until my eyes roll back in my head and my back arches off him. He keeps pumping his fingers until the spasming stops, and I slump into a sticky, satisfied mess on his chest.
He gently pulls out his fingers and presses his lips against my damp forehead. โOpen your mouth,โ he tells me, a curious glint in his eyes as I look up at him, confused.
I do as Iโm told, too content to argue, and wait with an open mouth. He presses his two wet fingers against my tongue, and I immediately taste the heady, salty-sweet taste. โSuck. See how fucking good you taste,โ he whispers.
โNaโโ
The music cuts off abruptly, and my entire body freezes, eyes widening as Nathan quickly pulls his fingers from my mouth and unpins my legs so I can close them.
โDoes anyone want McDonaldโs?โ
I PROMISEย myself the remaining ten minutes in the car back to Maple Hills will be uneventful.
Sabrina shoots me a suspicious glare over her shoulder as she drops the window. โItโs, uh, too hot. Need fresh air.โ
Looking up at Nathan, feeling a mixture of drunk, sleepy, sated, I wait until he looks down at me before whispering. โDoes it smell like sex?โ
He snorts and presses his lips to my nose affectionately. โAll I can smell is your shampoo. Iโm going to be getting hard over honey and strawberry because itโll remind me of this. Very impractical, Allen.โ
Nate is right; it is very impractical, but right now I donโt mind. He holds me close, keeping me chatting and laughing until we pull up in front of his house.
Everyone charges toward the door, some carrying full McDonaldโs bags and others attempting to carry each other.
I follow Sabrina into the house while Nate helps grab Robbie and JJ, who are so drunk theyโre fast asleep. As soon as weโre out of earshot of the other guys, she tugs my arm and drags me to the kitchen corner. โDid you have sex in the Uber?โ
Her voice says outrage, but her face says pride. So, so, so much pride. โNo, I did not!โ Technically not lying.
โYou did something, Anastasia Allen.โ
Large arms wrap around my waist from behind, and I feel his mouth kiss my shoulder. โBrin, Robbie said to tell you to go and get your chicken nuggets.โ
Her eyes widen and she probably forgot all about them, knowing Sabrina. When she runs off in the direction of the living room, Nate turns me in his arms so weโre facing each other, a pleased smirk on his face. He pushes my hair behind my ears. โDo you want to go to bed?โ
โSo badly.โ
Grabbing a couple of water bottles from the fridge, he threads his fingers through mine, navigating us toward the staircase through his drunk teammates littering the living area.
He lets me go first, his hand gripping my waist tightly to ensure I donโt lose my balance in these ridiculously tall heels. โStop looking at my ass, Hawkins.โ
โStop having an ass that looks like that.โ
We finally reach his door and I press in the code, frowning when the keypad flashes red instead of green. I do it again. Red. โYour door is broken,โ I grumble, trying one more time.
โIt worked a few hours ago. Are you putting in the right code?โ
โYeah!โ I punch in the numbers again. โTwo-five-three-nineโฆItโs red.โ โThat isnโt my code,โ he says, shuffling me out of the way to put in four
different digits. The keypad immediately flashes green.
โWhat do you mean it isnโt your code? Have you changed it?โ He shakes his head, ushering me through the door. Iโm adamant Iโm right, until the tequila fog clears for a split second, and I realize Iโm not right. โNo, sorry, tequila brain. Itโs the code for Ryanโs room.โ
Itโs like the room temperature chills as I watch almost every emotion sweep across his face at once. Uncapping one of the water bottles, he takes a large swig, nodding to himself like heโs having a conversation Iโm not invited to.
He kicks off his shoes, pulls off his socks, and unbuttons his jeans, dragging them down over his muscular thighs, reaching over his shoulder to pull his T-shirt off his body.
It feels unfair to witness this for the first time not stone-cold sober. Iโm scared Iโve missed a muscle or an ab, perhaps a freckle somewhere on his chest. Heโs unbelievable, and heโs not even reacting as I shamelessly stare at him as he walks around his room in tight, gray boxers.
He grabs a black T-shirt from a drawer, the Titans logo visible near the neck, and hands it to me. He sighs, finally saying something. โRyan, yeah, I forgot about Ryan somehow. The guy youโre fucking.โ
I should have seen this conversation coming. โWeโre not hooking up.โ
Following him with my eyes, I watch as he sits on the bed, shoulder muscles tense. โYou told Henry youโre fucking him. I even got to see him in your bed.โ
He doesnโt sound mad. He sounds, I donโt know. I donโt know how he sounds; I donโt know whatโs going through his head.
โWeโve had a friends-with-benefits thing for a while. He wants to date Olivia, so weโve stopped.โ I shrug, hoping my brief explanation is enough, but I can tell by his face itโs not. โWe didnโt even do anything the other night; we watched a movie and went to sleep. Heโs my best friend, Nate, and it isnโt any of your business. Why are you jealous?โ
He ignores my questions, tugging my hips until Iโm directly in front of him. I expect him to say something now, but again, he doesnโt.
Reaching to my feet, he unbuckles each heel and instructs me to step out of them. The relief of pressing my feet against the flat, hard floor after hours of torture is arguably better than the orgasm Nate gave me earlier, but I donโt feel like now is the right time to bring that up.
He runs his hands up the back of my thighs gently. โIโm jealous because I want you all to myself, Stassie, and Iโm jealous of any guy you freely give your attention to. Iโm even jealous of Henry, for fuckโs sake, and I love that kid.โ
โRyan and I worked so well because we didnโt get jealous. We didnโt care what the other did outside of our arrangementโฆโ
โThatโs swell,โ he says sarcastically. โBut Iโm not Ryan.โ
He grips the back of my thighs and pulls them forward so my knees fall on either side of his hips, straddling him. Iโm painfully aware of the no-panty situation when my dress begins to ride up, stopping only when his large hands squeeze my ass, and he uses his grip to grind my pussy against him.
โI donโt wanna share you with some other guys. You know I can keep you perfectly satisfied all on my own, in every way you need.โ
This feels dangerously close to exclusive territory, something I do not want. I brush his hair back from his face and press my lips against the corner of his mouth gently. โStop overthinking and fuck me. Itโs not that serious.โ
Rolling me onto my back, Nate climbs between my legs, applying pressure exactly where I want it. My fingers sink into his back to pull his
body on top of mine so I can feel every breath. I need more friction, more pressure, more him. โDo you have a condom?โ
His nose brushes against mine, once, twice. A garbled moan rumbles in his throat when I roll my hips against where heโs straining against his boxers. โI fucking hate myself right now, but weโre not having sex.โ
Of all the things I was expecting him to say, that was somewhere right near the bottom. โWhat?โ
โI donโt want to have sex with you. No. Shit, I do, but not right now.โ He presses his forehead against mine, lowering his voice. โI want you to want me when youโre sober, Anastasia. I canโt do another week of you avoiding me. I fucking hate it.โ
The sting of rejection sinks to my stomach, and itโs like I canโt breathe. โOh, okay. Thatโs fine. C-could you get off me, please?โ
โI didnโt mean it the way it came out; Iโm sorry. I just donโt want to be another drunken hookup. Put the T-shirt on; we can talk or sleep, whatever you wanna do.โ
What heโs saying makes sense, but somehow it doesnโt soothe the embarrassment Iโm feeling. My lip wobbles, despite my attempts to concentrate on him saying he does want me. It sounds like he only wants me if I offer him more, which I canโt do. The need to please him and escape him are battling against each other in my brain, suffocating me.
โStassie, please donโt cry, fuck. I want you so badly; I just donโt want the first time we have sex to be something you regret.โ
Saying nothing further, I reach for the Titans T-shirt and head toward the bathroom. When Iโve changed out of my dress, cheeks still pink and eyes threatening to water, heโs already in the bed, so I climb in beside him.
He leans over and presses his lips to my temple, kissing repeatedly. โDo you want to cuddle?โ
I rest my head against the pillow. โIโm not a cuddler.โ He chuckles, kissing me one more time. โGood night.โ I wait until heโs fast asleep before requesting the Uber.