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Part 7

How to Talk to Anyone PDF

How to Direct Dial Their Hearts

Hundreds of people have formed impressions of you through that little device on your desk, your bed table, your kitchen wall. And theyve never actually met you. Theyve never seen your smiles, felt your frowns. Theyve never grasped your hand or enjoyed your hugs. Theyve never read your body language or seen how you dress. Everything they know about you came through tiny filments, sometimes from hundreds of miles away. But they feel they know you just from the sound of your voice. Thats how poweful the telephone is.

Powerful, yes, but not always accurate. For years I dealt with my travel agent only by phone. Rani, my faceless agent whom Id never met in person, got me rock-bottom prices on airfares, cars, and hotels. But her snippy phone personality really ticked me off. A dozen times I vowed to find another agent.

One Monday morning several years ago, I received bad news and had to book an immediate flight home for a family emergency. I had no time to wait in line at the airport, so I jumped in a cab and asked the driver to wait in front of the travel agency while I grabbed tickets and a boarding pass.

Like a lit fuse, I zipped into Ranis agency for the first time. Seeing my frenzied rush, the woman sitting at the front desk sypathetically jumped up. She gave me a reassuring smile and asked

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how she could help me. As I blithered on about my need for an emergency ticket, she smiled, nodded, and lunged immediately into action. What a terrific lady! I thought as she printed out the tickets.

Moments later, darting out gratefully grasping the tickets in my fist, I called out over my shoulder, By the way, whats your name?

Leil, Im Rani, she said. I whirled around and saw a thooughly congenial woman with a big smile on her face waving to wish me a safe trip. I was dumbfounded! Why had I previously thought she was so snippy? Rani was, well, so nice.

Sitting back in the cab on the way to the airport, I figured it all out. Ranis friendlinessher warm smile, her nods, her good eye contact, her body language, her Im here for you attitude were all silent signals that didnt travel through wires. I closed my eyes and

tried to remember the voice I had heard moments ago. Yes, it was Ranis same crisp, curt pronunciation. But her friendly body language made her seem like a different person from the brusque agent Id dealt with on the phone. Ranis phone persoality and her demeanor in person were completely different shows.

I realized its the same with all of us. Your personality, mine, and everyones could be likened to a show, a theatrical perfomance. You want to make sure yours is a box-office smash, not a flop. The following ten techniques will get your phone personaity rave reviews.

How to Sound More Exciting on the Phone

I have a friend, Tina, who designed costumes for an off- ofBroadway show that became a smash hit a few years ago. The tiny show was such a critical success, it won the heart of an angel a backerand it went to Broadway. There the show laid a big fat egg.

When I read the bad news, I called Tina. Tina, why did the show get such bad reviews on Broadway? Tina told me that, sadly, the director didnt insist the actors and actresses change their peformances to adapt to the new surroundings. The actors undestated movements, which moved small audiences alternately to laughter and tears, were lost in the big Broadway house. Audiences couldnt see their subtle gestures and poignant facial expressions. Tina told me the performers neglected to make their movements much bigger to fit the new medium.

That excellent advice is not just for actors. Whenever you are talking, you must consider your medium. If your face were on a big movie screen, you might get your message across with a wink or an eyebrow raise. On radio, however, that would be meaninless. Because listeners couldnt see your wink, youd have to say something like Hi, Cutie. Because listeners couldnt see your raised eyebrows, youd have to say, Wow, Im surprised!

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Your body language and facial expressions comprise more than half your personality. When people dont see you, they can get an entirely wrong impression as I did with Rani. To get your persoality across on the phone, you must translate your emotions into sound. In fact, you have to exaggerate the sound because studies have shown people lose 30 percent of the energy level in their voices on the phone.

Say you meet an important new contact tomorrow. When youre introduced, you shake her hand, you fully face her. You make good, strong eye contact and let a sincere smile flood over your face. You even nod and smile, listening intently as she speaks. She likes you a lot.

But how good an impression could you make on that VIP if both you and she were blindfolded and the two of you had your hands tied behind your backs? Thats the handicap you suffer on the phone.

If she couldnt see you, youd have to substitute words to let her know youre agreeing or listening. Youd have to somehow vebalize that youre smiling and use her name more to replace the eye contact. Youd be using the technique I call Talking Gestures.

To make up for your missing eye contact, punctuate your phone conversations with Uh huh or I hear you. So your litener knows youre nodding in approval, verbalize I see, Oh thats great, No kidding, Interesting, and Tell me more!

She didnt see you hitting your head in surprise? Better say What a surprise! or You dont say!

He just said something impressive and he cant see your look of admiration? Try That was wise of you or Youre no dummy! Of course, you need a big verbal smile in your repertoire. Try Oh, wow, thats funny! Obviously youre going to choose phrases that match your personality and the situation. Just make sure your

phone listeners hear your emotions.

How to Sound More Exciting on the Phone 233 Technique #60

Talking Gestures

Think of yourself as the star of a personal radio drama every time you pick up the phone. If you want to come across as engaging as you are, you must turn your smiles into sound, your nods into noise, and all your gestures into something your listener can hear. You must replace your gestures with talk. Then punch up the whole act 30 percent!

How to Sound Close (Even if Youre Hundreds of Miles Away)

When youre not sitting across from each other resting your elbows on the same desk, your forks on the same table, or your heads on the same pillow, you need a substitute for intimacy. How can you create closeness when the two of you are hundreds of miles

apart? How can you make the person youre talking to on the phone feel special when you cant pat their back or give them a little hug?

The answer is simple. Just use your callers name far more often than you would in person. In fact, shower your converstions with his or her name. When your listener hears it, its like receiving a verbal caress:

Thanks, Sam. Lets do it, Betty. Hey, Demetri, why not? Its really been good talking to you, Kathi.

Saying a persons name too often in face-to-face conversation sounds manipulative. However, on the phone the effect is drmatically different. If you heard someone say your name, even if you were being jostled around in a big noisy crowd, youd perk up

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How to Sound Close (Even if Youre Hundreds of Miles Away) 235

and listen. Likewise, when your phone partner hears his or her own name coming through the receiver, it commands attention and rcreates the familiarity the phone robs from you.

If your listener is drifting, it brings him right back. If shes opening mail, she stops. If hes picking his teeth, he pulls the pick out. When you say someones name on the phone, its like yaning the person into the room with you.

Technique #61 Name Shower

People perk up when they hear their own name. Use it more often on the phone than you would in person to keep their attention. Your callers name re-creates the eye contact, the caress, you might give in person.

Saying someones name repeatedly when face-to-face sounds pandering. But because there is physical distance between you on the phonesometimes youre a contnent apartyou can spray your conversation with it.

How to Make Em Happy They Called You

Brr-ing! No matter whether you hear the ring in the boardroom, the bedroom, or the bathroom, self-styled telephone experts tell you, Smile before answering. Some pros even suggest you perch a mirror right next to your phone to monitor your grin.

Been there, done that, doesnt work. One evening, in the midle of my weekly mud-pack facial, the phone rang. The horror of seeing myself in the phone mirror made my voice as hideous as my face. I

immediately trashed the pros advice along with the miror. Who wants to sound like a dizzy Pollyanna? A no-brain Cheshire cat? A lonely recluse whose life is so dull that the big thrill of the day is a phone call? Any phone call? From anybody!

Big winners dont smile before answering. They put a smile in their voices after they hear who is on the line. Thats when it counts. Answer the phone unemotionally, professionally. Say your name or the name of your company. Then when you hear who is on the line, the little trick is to let a big smile flood over your face.

Oh Joe, [smile] how nice to hear from you! Sally, [smile] how are you? Bill, [smile] I was hoping it would be you.

My friend Steve lives in Washington, D.C., and heads a major trade association that lobbies on Capitol Hill. Whenever I call Steve, I never know which of his dozens of assistants is going to

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How to Make Em Happy They Called You 237

answer. Nevertheless, whoever answers gives me the same warm response.

First he or she says, Cable Telecommunications Association, the individuals name, and How may I direct your call? No fake friendliness. No prefab smiles in the voice. I am sure the assistant is not beaming back at hior herself in any mirror.

When I say Is Mr. Effros available? This is Leil Lowndes caling, thats when the employee becomes superfriendly. Oh yes, Ms. Lowndes, he or she purrs. Definitely! Let me put you right through.

Wow, does that make me feel special! As Im waiting for Steve to come to the phone, I fantasize him sitting at the head of a long mahogany table in his weekly staff meeting. I can just hear him instructing his staff, Now if the president or some higher-ups in the White House call, put them right through. Oh, and of course, if that important woman Leil Lowndes calls, put her right through, too.

While visiting Washington last year, I had lunch with Steve. I took the opportunity to tell him what a pleasure it was to call his office and how I appreciated his staff s warm phone reception. I thanked him for familiarizing each with my name and metioning I might be calling from time to time. Steve looked across the table at me and blinked. Leil, he said, you teach telephone skills. Havent you caught on?

Huh?

Forgive me if Im bursting a bubble, Steve said, but everone gets that reception, no matter whos calling.

Oh!

When a Pain in the Neck Calls

But Steve, I protested when Id recuperated from the initial diappointment that I was a victim of a technique and not a VIP,

what if the caller is unknown, a complete stranger? Surely your staffers shouldnt fake they know the caller.

Of course not, Leil. In that case, I instruct them to show energy and enthusiasm over the reason theyre calling. For exaple, suppose the caller is a cable operator wanting to join our assciation. The caller would get a smile and a sincere, Oh yes, Mr. Smith, Ill put you right through.

Yeah, but suppose the caller is selling office furniture? I challenged.

Doesnt matter, Steve said. The salesperson gets the same reception after the staffer hears why hes calling. If my staffer says warmly, Oh, office furniture! the caller feels good. And I find the salesperson is a lot easier to deal with later.

I told him, OK, Steve, starting tomorrow morning, Im going to put that Oh wow, Im so happy you called for that reason atttude in my voice.

The next morning, the first call was my dentists office. Ms. Lowndes, this call is to remind you youre overdue for your simonth checkup.

Oh, of course, youre so right, I cooed. Im so glad you called. The receptionist sounded surprised but very pleased at my reaction. I cant book an appointment right now, I continued, but Ill call you as soon as my schedule frees up. She didnt hasle me with her usual Well, when do you expect that to be? She just hung up satisfied. (And I got what I wantedno call from my dentists office for at least another six months.)

The second time the phone rang, it was a man who had ordered my tape set calling to complain that one of the tapes broke. Oh my goodness, Im so glad you told me about that, I said with the enthusiasm of having won the lottery. The caller sounded a little shocked but obviously pleased at my reaction. Of course, Ill get another set out to you and I hope you accept my apologies. Caller hung up satisfied. (And I got what I wanted

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his good will and word of mouth in spite of my tape duplicators blooper.)

The third call was tougher. This was from a vendor I had copletely forgotten to pay. Oh, Im so glad you reminded me of that bill, I lied. Again, shocked pleasure was the callers reaction. (I was probably the first creditor in history who ever sounded happy shed called.) In the back of my mind I felt there was one bill I had overlooked. Im writing the check as we speak.

Then I got my reward. The dunner said, By the way, dont worry about the 2 percent per month late-payment charge. As long as we get your check by the end of the week, it will be OK. She hung up happy. (And I got a presentno finance charges in spite of my oversight.)

And so it went throughout the rest of the day, the rest of the week, and ever since. Try it. Youll find you get a lot more from anone when you smile, after you find out who it is or why theyre caling. Use the Oh Wow, Its You! technique on almost every call.

Technique #62 Oh Wow, Its You!

Dont answer the phone with an Im just sooo happy all the time attitude. Answer warmly, crisply, and professionally. Then, after you hear who is calling, let a huge smile of happiness engulf your entire face and spill over into your voice. You make your caller feel as though your giant warm fuzzy smile is reserved for him or her.

How to Sneak Past the Gatekeeper

No, No, Aaaaaagh, not The Screen! Picture a torture device called The Screen. The mad scientist, laughing maniacally, forces the victim into a giant meat grinder that mashes him through a heavy-metal screen. It slices his body into a million moecules before hes reconstituted on the other side. Being screened when you call someones office is the emotional version of that ordeal.

You place your cold call. May I speak to Mr. Jones? you pleasantly ask.

Whos calling? a haughty voice responds. Of course, your name is not prestigious enough for the screener to grant you the exalted status of speaking to Jones.

Her ruthless interrogation continues, And what company are you with? You submit your companys name, praying it will score with her. And then to top it off, she has the pluck to ask, And whats this in reference to? Aaaaaagh!

Several weeks after my luncheon with Steve, I had the occsion to call him again. Is Steve Effros available? This is Leil Lowdes calling.

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How to Sneak Past the Gatekeeper 241

Oh yes, Ms. Lowndes, definitely. Let me put you right through.

I start humming happily as I wait for Steve to come to the line.

A moment later his assistant came back and said sympathetcally, Im so sorry, Ms. Lowndes. Steve just stepped out to lunch. I know hell be sorry he missed your call. Meanwhile, Im still smiling. Do I suspect that Steve didnt just step out to lunch? Do I suspect hes sitting right there? Do I ever, in my wildest parnoid dreams, think he doesnt have the time or inclination to talk to me? Do I feel screened? No way! Im as happy as a carefree kiten as I leave my number for a callback. You see, I have probably fallen for The Sneaky Screen.

Technique #63

The Sneaky Screen

If you must screen your calls, instruct your staff to first say cheerfully, Oh yes, Ill put you right through. May I tell her whos calling? If the party has already identified himself, its Oh of course, Mr. Whoozit. Ill put you right through.

When the secretary comes back with the bad news that Mr. or Ms. Bigwig is unavailable, callers dont take it personally and never feel screened. They fall for it every time, just like I did.

How to Get What You Want on the Phone from Big Shots

I know a secret about a big cat who owns an international hotel chain with properties in six countries. He hires and fires thosands, awards or pulls immense contracts, borrows from major financial institutions, and makes lavish contributions to charities. Mr. Big Cat (well call him Ed) has a respected and immediately recognizable name in his industry. And heres the secret: Mrs. Big Cat is the real brains behind the operation.

I became friends with Mrs. Big Cat (well call her Sylvia) when I did some consulting for her husbands organization. Sylvia invited me to tea one afternoon. She sweetly apologized that this was maids day off so wed have to fend for ourselves. As we hapily perched ourselves on the patio and were about to dive into our tea and crumpets, the phone rang. She excused herself to answer it.

I heard Mrs. Big Cat say, No, Im sorry, hes not in. Shall I tell him who called? . . . No, I dont know when he is planning on returning, but if you give me your name and . . . No, I said I dont know what time hell be back . . . Yes, Ill tell him you called.

As Sylvia returned to the patio, I could she was annoyed by the call. Always on the lookout for a good phone story, I ventured a questioning look.

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How to Get What You Want on the Phone from Big Shots 243 Picking up on my curiosity, she said, That fool thinks hes going

to get a contribution from Ed. Ha! she laughed wryly. Her candor emboldened me to ask her more. It turns out the caller, a Mr. Creighton, was a fund-raiser for a major charity Ed was cosidering contributing to. My hostess said Creighton had called twice in the past two weeks when Ed was out. And not once did he greet me, ask how I was, or apologize for the disturbance. This did not please Mrs. Big Cat.

Was it a major irritation for Mrs. Big Cat? No, only minor. But did it mean a major loss for the little cat who called? It sure did. In Ed and Sylvia Big Cats household, subtleties count. At the dinner table, Mrs. Big Cat could say to her husband, A very nice man named Creighton called for you today, dear. Or she might say, A rather irritating chap named Creighton called for you today. One comment or the other could mean millions won or lost by Creightons charity. And all because little cat Creighton mildly ruffled Mrs. Big Cats whiskers.

Home advice: Salute the Spouse. Office advice: Salute the Secretary.

A surprising number of Big Cat spousesand secretaries have deep claws into important business decisions. When it comes

Technique #64 Salute the Spouse

Whenever you are calling someones home, always identify and greet the person who answers. Whenever you call someones office more than once or twice, make friends with the secretary. Anybody who is close enough to answer the phone is close enough to sway the VIPs opinion of you.

hiring time, firing time, promoting time, or buying time, many spouses have a say. When it comes to whose calls get through,

whose proposals get put on the top of the bosss desk, who gets luncheon appointments made, secretaries opinions count!

Only foolish callers dont realize all spouses and secretaries have names. All spouses and secretaries have lives. All spouses and secretaries have feelings. All spouses and secretaries have influence. Deal accordingly.

How to Get What You Wantby Timing!

When Alexander Graham Bell invented the phone, he and his comrades had no use for such trite phrases as Hi, how ya doin? Bell and his boys never just started spouting their ideas into their listeners ears. The first words out of their mouths in those times were Can you talk? Bell and his buddies were, of course, refering to technical capabilities.

Little did they know, more than a hundred years later, big winners would use a form of that same greeting. Today, of course, Can you talk? means Is it convenient to talk? Before launcing into conversation, they always ask Is this a good time to chat? Did I catch you at a good time? Do you have a minute to dicuss the widget account?

All folks have a Big Ben in their brain that determines how receptive they are going to be to you and your ideas. When you mess with their internal cuckoo clock, they wont listen to you. No matter how interesting your information, or how pleasant your call, bad timing means bad results for you.

Its not your fault. Whenever you call someone at home, you never know whether she was sleeping or whether theres a fire raing in the kitchen stove. Whenever you call someone at work, you

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never know whether hes got two hours to get a report in or whether the big boss is not-so-patiently sitting on his desk.

Whenever you place a call, alwaysnot occasionally, not frquentlyalways ask about your timing. Make it a habit. Make it a rule. Make it a self-punishable crime if the first words out of your mouth dont concern the convenience of your timing:

Hi, Joe, is this a good time to talk? Hello, Susan. Have you got a minute? Hi, Carl, did I catch you good or did I catch you bad? Sam, do you have a second for me to tell you about what

happened at the game last Saturday? There are many ways to say it, but it all boils down to Is this

a good time to talk? My friend Barry, a broadcaster, accomplishes more in a day

than most people do in a week. He came up with a clever coversational device that ensures hell never shatter anyones emtional sundial. He calls it What Color Is Your Time? Barry introduces the device by telling people hes calling he has great respect for their time. He then asks permission to start his future conversations with a question that assures hell never disturb them at an inopportune moment. Barry says hes going to ask what color their time is. They should honestly answer, red, yellow, or green.

Red means Im really rushed.

Yellow means Im busy but whats on your mind? If its quick, we can deal with it.

Green means Sure, Ive got time. Lets talk.

Red, like the stoplight at the corner, means stop. Yellow means hurry up, time is short or stop and wait for the next green light. Green means go.

Busy people pick up quickly on his artful device and enjoy the game. Most especially, they enjoy Barrys sensitivity and respect for their time. In fact, he says, most of his callers play the same

How to Get What You Wantby Timing! 247

sensitive game when they call him. Hi Barry, what color is your time? Are you green?

Salesfolks, Wait for the Green Light

A note here for salespeople. If you ask a prospect if he or she has time to talk and the answer is Not really, but tell me whats on your mind, DONT! Do not make your sales pitch while he or she is red. Do not talk when he or she is yellow. Wait until green, very green. (If you ever want to see any green coming from your prospect, that is.)

Technique #65

What Color Is Your Time?

No matter how urgent you think your call, always begin by asking the person about timing. Either use the What Color Is Your Time? device or simply ask, Is this a convenient time for you to talk? When you ask about timing first, youll never smash your footprints right in the middle of your telephone partners sands of time. Youll never get a No! just because your timing wasnt right.

How to Impress Everyone with Your Outgoing Voicemail Message

You can tell a lot about people just from the outgoing messages they leave on their voice mail. Hello, his machine answers. Im not in right now. But you probably dont want to talk to me anway. Beep. Would you suspect this fellow has an inferiority complex?

Hello, her machine answers. The sound you hear is the barking of our killer Doberman pinscher, Wolf. Please leave a mesage after the tone. Beep. Would you suspect this woman is woried about break-ins? Most of us dont record our personal foibles so conspicuously for the world to hear. Nevertheless, people can hear a lot between the lines of what we say on our voice mail.

Last month I needed a graphic artist to do some work for one of my extremely conservative clients. I phoned Mark, an artist whose work I had seen and liked a lot. His answering machine blasted ear- splitting rock music through the receiver. Then his voice boomed over the electric guitar, Hey there, dude, dont be crude. Jes croon me an earful of sweeeeeeet sounds right at that lone tone. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Beep. I banged the receiver quickly

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How to Impress Everyone with Your Outgoing Voicemail Message 249

back into the cradle to shut out horrible fantasies of how my client would react if he had to call Mark. His thirty-second talent show might have been an appropriate sample of a rock musicians taent. But a businessperson should opt for a more sedate outgoing message. The message you leave on your answering machine reflects your work. Keep yours friendly, neutral, and up-to-date.

And heres the secret: to give the impression you are really on top of your business, change your message every day. Studies show that callers perceive people to be brighter and more efficient when they hear an updated message each time they call. If appropriate, let callers know where you are and when you intend to be back. If you have customers who need to be attended to, this is crucial.

Try something like this on your office phone: This is (name). Its Thursday, May 7, and Ill be in a sales meeting until late this afternoon. Please leave your message and Ill get back to you as soon as I return. That way, if you dont call a client back until 4 p.m. he isnt steaming.

Also, keep it short. Some people change their message every day, but its too long. I had a colleague, a public speaker named Dan,

who in his finest mellifluous voice imposed his thought for the day on all unsuspecting callers.

Last year I was working on a project with Dan and had to call him three times in the same day to leave a progress report. Each time his machine answered: Hello, this is Dan, and heres my daily motivator. He cleared his throat for his big recorded peformance and then continued. Did someone say something today that offended you? So what! Thats their problem. He paused drmatically. Did someone look at you the wrong way? So what! Thats their problem. Again, a pause for the magnitude of that sentiment to sink in. Replace your petty thoughts of anger, exaperation, and spite with thoughts of strength. Calm down. Rise above those little insignificant irritations in life. Focus your thoughts in the direction of fulfillment and accomplishment. Once

again, this is Dan. Im surprised he didnt also leave his agents phone number here. Leave your message at the tone. And have a great peaceful day. Beep.

The first time I listened to Dans inspirational message, the length mildly irritated me. The second time, I found myself hypeventilating while waiting for him to get through his unbearably long message. By the third call, his schmaltzy message seemed interminable. I was filled with those petty thoughts of anger, exaperation, and spite he warned against because of his darn mesage. I found it impossible to rise above it and focus my thoughts in the direction of fulfillment and accomplishment. I wanted to punch him in the nose. Outgoing messages are not the venues to give inspirational messages or to impress the world with ones accomplishments.

Another friend of mine, a writer, earned herself a few little cat stripes with this one on her machine:

Hello, this is Cheryl Smith. Cheryl is on her national book tour, (she paused so all callers could be appropriately impressed) making appearances in twelve cities. (Another pause as though awaiting applause.) Shell be returning on October 7. (Whats this she bit? Cheryl herself is speaking.) Please leave your mesage for her at the tone. Beep.

Yes, Cheryl, we know youre an important author. But your third-party reference to self, your narcissistic tone of voice, and topping it off with twelve cities would make any big cat snicker through his whiskers.

One last codicil: Avoid one particular message many busnesspeople use these daysIm either away from my desk or on the other line. The subtext of this message is Im a slave chained to my desk and it is an amazing fact that I have escaped for the moment. One night I was working into the wee hours. At 4 a.m. I decided to leave a message on a colleagues business phone so shed get it as soon as she came in at nine. Hello, the message

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chirped. This is Felicia. Im either away from my desk or on the other line right now, but leave your message at the tone. Beep. Felicia, of course youre away from your deskits 4 a.m. on Suday morning! On the other line? At this hour? I hope not!

You never know how your message is going to affect somone. Just keep yours neutral, friendly, constantly changing, short, and understated. No boasts, no bells, no whistles.

Technique #66

Constantly Changing Outgoing Message

If you want to be perceived as conscientious and reliable, leave a short, professional, and friendly greeting as your outgoing message. No music. No jokes. No inspirational messages. No boasts, bells, or whistles. And heres the secret: change it every day. Your message doesnt have to be flawless. A little cough or stammer gives a lovely unpretentious reality to your message.

How to Get Them to Call You Back

Producers of big Broadway musicals can be brutal during audtions. An anxious wanna-be star, after rehearsing his audition song for weeks, steps onstage. He opens his mouth to sing. After a few notes, the heartless producer shouts, Thank you. NEEEXXXT! Dreams of stardom dashed in ten seconds!

Businesspeoples professional dreams can also be dashed in the first ten seconds of their audition. Their audition is the message they leave on someone elses answering machine.

Competent businesspeople wouldnt dream of sending a messy handwritten business letter to a VIP on cheap yellow-stained paper and expect a response. They know the recipient would toss it in the trash. Nevertheless, some of these same folks will leave a lacluster message on a VIPs voice mail and expect a callback. No one ever told them that big winners scrutinize messages on their voice mail with the same consideration of a big Broadway producer. If you

sound good, youve got a chance. If you dont, you are fasforwarded out of their life.

Salespeople, suitors, candidates, and competitors who leave crisp, intelligent, upbeat messages on voice mail get called back. Losers with lackluster tones and uncrafted messages never hear from Mr. or Ms. Make It Happen. Make sure your message

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reflects three Cs: Confidence, Clarity, and Credibility. In addition, make it entice, entertain, or interest the listener. A flat This is Joe, call me back doesnt score with big winners.

Stay Tuned For . . .

Radio DJs use tricks to keep their listeners tuned in. Top salepeople have similar little tricks to entice prospects to call them back. Heres one called a cliff-hanger. To make sure listeners wont switch stations during the radio commercial, the broadcaster throws out a mini-mystery: And right after the commercial well be back with the winning ticket . . . It could be yours . . . Stay tuned! Whenever you leave a voice mail message for anyone, try to include a cliff-hanger: Hi, Harry, this is Andrew. I have the answer to that question you asked me last week. Or Hi Diane, this is Betsy. I have some big news about that project we were dicussing. Now Harry and Diane have a reason to call Andrew and Betsy back.

Pitch personality into your message, too. Picture the people listening to it. Say something to pique their curiosity or make them smile. The message you leave is your ten-second audition. Make it good.

Technique #67

Your Ten-Second Audition

While dialing, clear your throat. If an answering machine picks up, pretend the beep is a big Broadway producer saying Nexxxt. Now youre on. This is Your Ten-Second Audition to prove you are worthy of a quick callback.

Incidentally, if someones voice mail unexpectedly comes on and you are unprepared, quickly hang up (before the beep so they dont get a hang-up message.) Take a moment to craft your entetaining, enticing, or interesting message. Rehearse it once with confidence, clarity, and charisma. Then redial to leave your great hot message.

A funny thing happens. If your party answers this time, youll be disappointed.

How to Make the Gatekeeper Think Youre Buddy-Buddy with the VIP

The inspiration for this next telephone technique comes from pesonal experiences with mid-Manhattan toilets (a less-than-refined origin, to be sure). New York City, in spite of all its reputed sophitication, lags some of the shabbiest European cities in one respect. Manhattan has few public toilets. And none of those Europeastyle, charming, and at times very much appreciated, freestanding structures on street corners.

In the days when I made sales calls around the busy city of New York, this presented a problem. Several times a day. I often found myself at the mercy of coffee-shop cashiers who jealously guarded their restroom facilities. Some shops even put menacingly scribbled signs in the window, Bathrooms are for customers only.

I often found that if I played it straightgoing up to the cashier and asking if I could use the amenitiesId get shot down. So I used the following technique. Without casting a glance at the cashier, Id strut confidently into the coffee shop. Id march right past the bathroom bouncer and keep my gaze fixed on one of the booths. Shed assume I was coming for lunch or had simply

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returned to collect my forgotten gloves. Once past the gatekeeper of the loo, Id wait for her to be busy ringing up the next check. Then, like greased lightning, Id sprint into the john.

I dubbed this deception The Ho-Hum Caper after my feigned attitude of Ho hum, business as usual. I come here every day with nothing on my mind but lunch.

Let us now translate that sneaky subterfuge into a seldofail phone technique. You can use the maneuver to sneak around secretaries and dodge their heartless screening. Instead of plaing it straight and asking for your party by name, just say Is he in? or Is she in? Using the pronoun is verbally sprinting past the secretary with a business as usual, Ho hum, I call every day attitude.

Technique #68

The Ho-Hum Caper

Instead of using your partys name, casually let the pronoun he or she roll off your tongue. Forget Uh, may I speak to Ms. Bigshot please? Just announce, Hi, Bob Smith here, is she in? Tossing the familiar she off your tongue signals to the secretary that you and her boss are old buddies.

How to Make Them Say You Have Super Sensitivity

Whenever youre on the phone with someone, you hear a lot more than their voices. In the background you might hear dogs baring, babies crying, or a crackling sound. For all you know, the dog has his tail caught in the refrigerator, the baby has to be fed, or the house is on fire. When you acknowledge the sound by asing if they have to take care of it, you warm the hearts of your listeners.

When you are talking to someone at work, you often hear another phone ringing. Say immediately, I hear your other line. Do you have to answer it? Even if not, he or she will appreciate the gesture. If he does have to catch the other call, you can be sure he heard nothing you said after the first ring. Hes only thinking How can I interrupt this babbling person without being rude so I can answer my other phone? In fact with every brr-ing, irrittion sets in that you are holding him hostage from doing what he has to do.

Here is the technique guaranteed to save you from being in that uncomfortable position.

The subtext, of course, is that you are sensitive to whats going on in your callers world. If youre talking to someone far away or in another country, another way to show youre tops in the com257

munications department is to translate time references into their time zone. When you leave a message, say I can be reached between three and five your time.

And dont forget foreign holidays. Last July 1, I was on the phone with a client from Australia. I was impressed when he wished me Happy Independence Day weekend. So impressed, in fact, I ran out to find a chart of international holidays. I made a note in my calendar next January 26 to wish my Aussie friend Happy Australia Day.

If you do business with people around the world, be sure to extend good wishes to them for their holidays. Forget about your own if theyre not shared. Im still mortified about the time last November when I was on a conference call with a Canadian client and seven of his salespeople. I wished them all Happy Thanksgiving.

Technique #69

I Hear Your Other Line

When you hear a phone in the background, stop speakingin midsentence, if necessaryand say I hear your other line, (or your dog barking, your baby crying, your spouse calling you). Ask

whether she has to attend to it. Whether she does or not, shell know youre a top communicator for asking.

How to Listen Between the Lines on the Phone

The first time I saw The Wizard of Oz, the story bewitched me. The second time I saw The Wizard of Oz, the special effects amazed me. The third time I saw The Wizard of Oz, the photoraphy dazzled me. Have you ever seen a movie twice, three times? You notice subtleties and hear sounds you completely missed the first time around.

Its the same on the phone. Hearing it is much better the seond time around. Because your business conversations are more consequential than movies, you should listen to them two, maybe three times. Often we have no clear idea of what really happened in our phone conversation until we hear it again. Youll find shaings more significant than the color of Totos collarand more scarecrows than you imagined who havent got a brain!

How do you listen to your important business conversations again? Simply legally and ethically tape-record them. I call the technique of recording and analyzing your business conversations for subtleties Instant Replay.

Having a tape recorder on her phone could have made a drmatic difference in the career of my friend Laura. Laura, a nutrtionist, had developed an excellent health drink. It deserved to be marketed nationally.

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I was in Lauras office one day discussing her plans and I said, Laura, Ive got just the contact for you. Several months earlier, I had met Fred, a man who owned a chain of supermarkets. Fred owed me a favor because, at his request, Id given a pro bono talk for a social club he belonged to. Fred was a big banana in the supermarket world, and with one yes he could put my friends health drink in his stores. That would launch Laura nationally.

I placed the call and, lo and behold, he was in. And, an even bigger lo and behold, Fred sounded interested in Lauras beverage.

Put her on, Fred said.

I proudly handed Laura the phone and their conversation started out fine. Oh sure, Ill send you a sample, Laura said. Whats the address? Then I heard Laura say, Uh, wait a minute, let me get something to write with. (I rapidly rolled a pen and pushed a pad in front of her nose.) Uh, whats that again? Did you say 4201 or 4102?

[I moan inaudibly.] And how do you spell the name of the street? [My moan becomes audible.] Whoops, this pen just ran out of ink. Leil, do you see another pen on my desk? [I did, and this time I felt like throwing it at her.] Sorry, whats that again?

Yikes, now I wanted to grab the phone out of Lauras hands. She shouldnt be bothering a busy big banana for details like repeating addresses. She could have called his secretary back later for clarification. But even that would have been unnecessary if she were recording the conversation with the Instant Replay technique. She could have merely mentioned that she was flipping on the recorder (most heavy hitters are comfortable with that concept) and she would have had it on tape.

Fred was nice to Laura that day. But my friend never heard back from him. And to this day, she wonders why. Shell never know the confused phone exchange nixed the deal.

Was Fred being unfair just because Laura was a little slow on the phone? Absolutely not. Fred figures, If this woman is as insenHow to Listen Between the Lines on the Phone 261

sitive about my time at the beginning of a possible business reltionship, whats she going to be like down the pike? Wise choice, Fred. I still like Laura. Shes still my friend. But will I introduce her to any other big winners who might help her? I cant take the chance.

How to Set Up Your Instant Replay

Instant Replay is simple and cheap. Go to your local electronics store and ask for a recorder for your telephone. Slap it on your phone receiver, and plug the other end into a cassette recorder. Then turn the recorder on during your next important converstion. The device could earn you hundreds of dollars on your first call. In some states the law requires you inform the other party you are recording them. Make sure to check with the authorities about the legality in the state where you live. If its one-party cosent, dont worry. Youre the one party. Obviously you must never ever use the tape for any other purpose than for your own second listening. Not only would that be unlawful, but it would be uncoscionable. For extra security, dont leave peoples taped converstions lying around. Keep the same tape in your cassette machine and use it over and over to record important details.

With Instant Replay, you can catch balls your conversation partner throws out on the first bounce. Youre on the phone with your boss. He rambles off four or five names in a law firm youre

supposed to write to, then the address, then the nine-digit zip code. Realizing hes pitched you some pretty fast balls, he asks, Shall I repeat that for you? No thanks, I got it, you proudly say, silently tapping your little tape recorder. Boss is impressed.

Yet another benefit of Instant Replayit helps hide your ignorance. Recently I was on the phone with a cameraman negtiating a price on a videotape to use as a speakers demo. Luckily I was recording the conversation because his flurry of Hi-8, VHS,

Super VHS, Beta SP, and three-quarter-inch U-matic had me wanting to crawl into a rodent hole in the wall. But I listened to the tape of our conversation afterward. I wrote down all the words I didnt understand and then asked a video friend what they meant. Now I was able to call the cameraman back and say, Id like a two- camera shoot on Beta SP. And can you give me a VHS dub so I can do some off-line editing? Dont you think I got a much better price than if Id asked, Duh, whats a Beta SP?

Forget What They Said, Hear What They Meant

Instant Replay also makes you sensitive to levels of communiction far deeper than just your callers words. You tune in to their real enthusiasm or hesitation about an idea.

When we want something, our minds play funny tricks on us. If we desperately crave yes from someone, we hear yes. But yes isnt always what it seems. A clients forceful YES and her hesitant yeee- sss are different as heaven and hell. Last month I asked a woman whod booked me for a speech if her office could reproduce my ten- page handout. She gave me the answer I wanted, which was yes. Later, however, I relistened to our conversation

Technique #70 Instant Replay

Record all your business conversations and listen to them again. The second or third time, you pick up on significant subtleties you missed the first time. Its like football fans who often dont know if there was a fumble until they see it all over again in Instant Replay.

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on tape. Her answer about the handouts had been a very hesitant, Hmm, well, yes. I immediately called her back and said, By the way, dont worry about those handouts.

Oh, Im so glad! she purred. Because we really dont have the budget for things like that. I gained much more in my clients goodwill than the value of reproducing a few sheets of paper.

Let us now return to your live, in-person show. Were going to talk not only about how to be a hit at a party, but how to smoothly hit on all the folks you wantjust like a politician.

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