gentle self-talk: “i am allowed to be human”

someone once commented, “Do you have any suggestions for self- affirmations? I try to do them, but I just don’t ever believe them.” To be honest, I have conflicting feelings on self-affirmations. During my eighteen months in drug rehab they often told us to look in the mirror and say an affirmation like “I am okay today” or “I am beautiful and

people like me.” Truth be told, I never felt they helped. I hated myself and saying, “I like myself,” in the mirror felt about as effective as saying, “I believe in unicorns”—and about as juvenile. But as I have

started down the road of understanding self-compassion, I have found one—just one—affirmation that actually does work for me. And it’s this: “I am allowed to be human.”

That’s it. Humans are born with the birthright of worthiness (thanks, Brené Brown), but you know what? They are also messy, fallible, imperfect creatures who cannot and will not ever get

everything right all the time. And this messy, fallible imperfection never detracts from our inherent worthiness. I am no exception and neither are you. When I get it wrong or struggle, this simple sentence reminds me that my worthiness is not at stake. So join me next time you feel the panic of making a mistake and say, “I am allowed to be human.”

One day I just start asking, “What if I am? What if I am deserving of kindness? What if I am worthy of love? What if I am someone who

deserves a functioning space? What if I am allowed to make mistakes?”

It doesn’t matter what you think the answer is. Just start making room for the possibility you are wrong when you say you aren’t

worthy.