August is pregnant.
I stood in the middle of the hockey arena, my damn head pounding. I looked in the crowd to look for my lucky charm only to
remember that she wasn’t there anymore. I wasn’t ready to be a father. But I had to be one.
August broke up with me because she believed that I wouldn’t take care of the baby with her. She needed money for the basic supplies. She told my father but didn’t feel the need to tell me.
After graduation, my father wanted August and I to get married.
He was absolutely fucked in the head for that thought. A baby and a damn wife, I was going to be sick.
I was blindsided. I was distraught and I didn’t know how to face Adrianna. I wasn’t sure if I could.
Like a coward, I never did.
August came back to finally tell me, thus the reason why she thought that I needed to prove that I could be in a healthy relationship.
For God’s sake, we’re in our second year of college and she’s fucking pregnant. My father did what he did best. He schemed and he threatened. I wasn’t exactly sure if the baby was mine. She had told me it was and who was I to doubt her?
I would like to think of her as loyal during our relationship. Nevertheless.
I miss whatever Adrianna and I were. It felt nice forgetting everything for a while, to spend three months being free.
The hardest thing that I have ever fucking done was walk away from Adrianna. I didn’t want to, but I had to. We were in too deep. My father started to find out about my meetings with her and hired guards to watch where I went every day after hockey. My father let me play hockey with the rule of breaking her heart and I did.
But I would give it up, I would give up my whole future in hockey if it meant I could be with Adrianna.
But I believed that she was stronger, I believed that my father would get karma slapped on his face when the day comes.
I had to cut off all contact with her because my father would cut me off. I had to provide for a damn baby now. It wasn’t enough to stop me, of course, I wanted to see Adrianna and I tried to.
Only to be warned by a sticky note that my mother was also watching my every move.
Nothing broke me more than the empty look Adrianna had given me earlier. I had to tell her, but I didn’t know how to. She would hate it. She would hate me.
August going to my father was not a good move.
The puck gets passed to me, my body at rest and slow when I miss it. I bang my stick on the floor as Coach Livingston yells at my laziness.
I wasn’t going to lie and say I wasn’t slacking. I was, and I wasn’t even sorry for it. An hour passed as everyone skated out of the rink and walked into the locker room, Liam and Chris were inside already.
“Get your shit together man!” Neil walks up to me.
I scowl at them, my brain felt fried to have another conversation where I had to stimulate words.
Liam walks up to me with a frown, “Hey Gray, you wanna come with me to the equipment room?” He winks.
I roll my eyes, “How subtle.”
He pulls me out of the locker room with a serious face, “That was the worst fucking play I’ve ever seen.” He puts his hand on his hips with a judgmental expression.
“You’re Grayson Prince!” He exclaims.
I sigh, “I’m not Grayson Prince without her.”
Liam nods, his face a bit concerned as I pull off my skates, “You can’t have her, Grayson. You have August.”
I sigh again and I made sure that he knew it wasn’t a good sigh, “Don’t remind me.”
“You said you wanted her all along and that Adrianna was just for disposal.” He says, my body tensed. I did say that, but inside I knew I was wrong the moment she laid her honey eyes on mine.
“Yes. Well, I’m fucking stupid.”
Liam looks at me, “I think what you did was shitty.” He makes a point as I nod, I couldn’t even be mad at him, Liam’s my best friend and I never got mad at him for telling me the truth.
“I wish I could fucking take everything back. If I had to, I wouldn’t have gone near Adrianna, knowing how bad it was gonna be.”
Liam thinks.
“That statement is improbable. If you had a chance to do it over, you and Adrianna would’ve still happened not because you are way too selfish to ever give her away just to anyone. You and her are made for each other, and everyone knew it except for you two.”
I stayed silent, “I miss her so much, man.” I run my fingers through my hair.
Liam quiets down, “I don’t think August’s kid is yours.” He implies. I look at him, “Oh, you think?”
He waddles over sitting next to me, “I don’t think that you guys were involved when the baby was conceived.”
“We were dating.” I counter as he leans closer, “She could have…”
I look at him with my hand raised, “Are you telling me August possibly cheated on me?”
Liam smugly looks at me, “Yes. That’s exactly want I’m saying. August may come off to look perfect in everyone’s eyes, but no one is perfect. Everyone has a skeleton in the back of their closet.”
I send him a look of worry, “I don’t have a skeleton in my closet.” “It’s a figure of speech!”
I laugh, “You learned that from Margo, didn’t you?”
“Don’t change the damn subject, Prince.” He breathes out, “This chick is ruining your happy ending with Adrianna. I think that if you find probable evidence that you aren’t the father then you’re off the hook.”
I look at him, “And if she did cheat, how are we going to prove that?” I counter.
He shoots me a scheming look, “Just leave it up to me.” He smirks.
I laugh, “I don’t think so.”
“Do you want Anna back or no?”
I roll my eyes, “Of course, I want her back.”
“Then we are going to dig for this information like no one’s fucking business.”
I get up brushing hm off, “You’re crazy.”
Liam runs up to me, “You still taking her to the Winter Charity Ball?” He asks.
I groan, “Father’s orders.”
“I can get some men there to figure it out for me.” He gives me a thumbs up.
“You hear if Adrianna is coming?” I pry as he looks over to Margo’s office.
“She’ll be there.”
I couldn’t help frowning. She didn’t want to talk to me, but I did. So, fucking terribly.
“You do know that she will never talk to you right? I’m pretty sure that she’s made a point to ignore you. That’s what Margo told me at least.”
“I know.” I look up at Liam, “She can hate me all she wants. She can fucking curse at me for hours, but I’ll get her back,” I took off my jersey, “I have to get her back.”
I couldn’t stop thinking about her. I’ve been talking to myself for the past week about her and the different ways I could’ve approached her. But instead, I didn’t, I was a damn coward and I fucking couldn’t.
She’s a once in a lifetime girl and I missed my damn chance. I looked up at Liam once more with a sorrowed expression, “That kid is most definitely not mine.”
There had to be something more to it, August was lying to me, and I needed to know why she would.
I picked up my phone looking for her contact, my eyes paused at Adrianna’s…
17 MISSED CALLS.
8 MISSED MESSAGES.
I click on August’s contact typing…
Dinner tonight 7?
Sure!
READ 4:22 P.M.
I wasn’t sure what my plan exactly was, but all I knew was that I needed to get out of this torment. It’s only been a fucking week and I was miserable without Adrianna.
My damn world was crumbling right beneath me, and I couldn’t do anything about it. But I had to try. August and I were a closed book never to be opened if this baby wasn’t mine… I would leave her instantly.
Margo was right when she said that I was ridden with guilt, it was not love.
“Just because you want to be with them because you made a mistake doesn’t mean you loved them at all. It means you’re selfish and you want to make yourself feel better.”
I plead fucking guilty.
 |
I picked up August and we went to a hibachi restaurant. I got dressed and then picked her up from her house. She was supposed to move in with us, but the problem was that Amelia hated her.
She forced Amelia to bake a batch of cookies yesterday and I’ve never
seen Amelia wanting so badly to lock herself in a damn oven.
“This is nice.” She sits on the passenger seat of a brand-new car I bought; I couldn’t bring myself to take her on my favorite car. Adrianna’s belongings were still there. Untouched.
They will remain there.
I ignore her as she puts her hand on top of mine. I stiffen, pulling away. “Grayson what’s wrong?” She turned to me as I kept my eyes on the
road, pulling into the parking lot.
“Don’t act like we are on a fucking date August.” I sneer as she looks back in front of her.
“I thought it was.”
I laugh gently, “I’m taking you because I want fucking answers.” I place the car on park, “And I needed to get away from my damn father.”
She tenses as we both get out of the car, and get seated her face falls, “Grayson, I don’t know what you want from me.”
“I want you to be honest with me, damn it.” I let out with force as she flinched.
“I have been honest Grayson!”
I breathe out with an annoyed expression, “I don’t think you fucking are. August, I’m not really sure what to fucking do if you really are telling me the truth.”
She looks at me with a blank expression, “You said you loved me and that you wanted me back.”
I shake my head, “Yes, but I didn’t mean I wanted to have a fucking child!”
She bends closer, “Well you fucking do, and you have no choice but be there for it because your father said so.” She makes a point.
I laugh, “So that’s why.” “What?”
“You went to my damn father because you knew he would force me to stay with you.” I place my elbows on the table, her eyes searching mine, “What happened from you telling me you would do anything to be with me now?”
I swallowed; I didn’t even need to answer the question. She knew exactly what happened. “Adrianna is a high-class bitch.”
“Which is what you’re going to become when you marry me.” I grit out, “And don’t ever fucking talk about her.”
“I don’t know how you could ever like someone like her! You used to make fun of her Grayson, hate whatever she fucking did.”
While I do admit that Adrianna and I didn’t start off with the best intentions, we built ourselves up to where we wanted to be, and it was perfect for the months it lasted.
“Am I really this child’s father August?” I ask kindly.
She looks at me with tears in her eyes, “Yes Grayson, and it hurts me to think I would have cheated on you.”
“You fucking dated another guy recently!”
“You think I would have sex with him that easily?” She screams at me as I look around, everyone staring.
“I don’t fucking know.”
“I can help you provide for the child. Just please tell me if it’s really mine.”
She sighs, “It’s really yours.”
I felt my heart drop a second time, my body tense as she looked at me wholeheartedly.
I didn’t believe her. “You’re getting a paternity test.” Her face held shock, “No!”
My eyes narrow, “You said it’s mine so we can make fucking sure of it.” I take a look at the waiter; he comes closer for us to order.
As the waiter walks away to get our order in the kitchen, I notice a familiar raven-haired vixen sitting on the other side of the restaurant, only she wasn’t alone.
She was with a boy who also looked fucking familiar, and I wasn’t about to be happy when I find out who it fucking was.
As August talked, I got up and walked over to Adrianna who simply saw me and never sneaked another glance. Her eyes had never looked so damn dark.
“Cassian.” I address her as she only looks up. She was with no one other than Darius fucking Sawyer. The blood in my veins pumped so fucking hard I was ready to throw a damn table at him. But he sat there looking like a damn priest.
Acting like he wasn’t only with Adrianna because he wanted to bang her like he fucking told me. “Grayson!” Darius addresses me as I ignore him.
“What the hell is he doing here?” I look at her as she stays silent.
I deserved this. I knew what I was fucking gambling when I broke her heart, but I still did it.
There was nothing I wanted to do more than hold her and tell her I’m sorry for everything, but I couldn’t. I had to figure things out first before I told her. I just wish that she’ll still be available to speak to me after.
I was fucking wishing to the damn Gods that she would still be on the other side at the end. But it was a risk.
“We are on date.” He speaks.
I turn my head to look at him, “I don’t think so.”
Adrianna finally speaks. It wasn’t much but it was something, “We are on a date.” She smiles with a distasteful look.
“And it looks like so are you!”
I look back to August who only stared.
“He’s fucking using you.” I seethe, the words come out of my mouth with such force.
Darius got up from him seat, his eyes blazing on to mine, “Might think about disrespecting me again, Prince.”
I laugh, squaring up, I was at least three inches taller than him, “You finally cashing in the ticket that lets me break your other arm?”
I lick my lips as he backs up, “You’re lucky I didn’t do it last game.” Darius smiles coyly, a malicious one as Adrianna looks at the security. I’m sure he hadn’t forgotten our last interaction.
“Take a punch.” I whisper, “I fucking dare you.”
His fists form as I smile back, catching his punch before it reached my face, turning his wrist in such an uncomfortable way that I heard it crack.
He takes his other fist and attempting to smashing it against my cheek but misses terribly, I take a punch, hitting him square on the fucking nose.
Adrianna pulls him off as August did the same for me.
“What the fuck is wrong with you? Smashing your fist into my date’s face!” She looks at me with utter annoyance, I later notice that I am indeed out of line.
“So, this is how it’s gonna be?” She asks.
August stood next to me, “He’s fucking using you.” I counter again, sounding like a broken record.
“And you weren’t?” She lets out as I swallow.
Didn’t she remember what I told her about Sawyer? Or was she just trying to piss me off?
I land next to August who I looked at, I hit her belly on accident, “Are you okay?” I spilled out seeing Adrianna’s expression.
“Darius didn’t fucking do anything to you, you made up lies just for me to not like him Grayson, so please never bother us again.” Adrianna said it so vigorously that I backed away.
“Again?” I say quietly, I wasn’t sure it projected well at all. My eyes find hers that were now a hue of red. That’s when it comes to my head, Adrianna was dating around, and I couldn’t stop it this time. I couldn’t say much about it because I was the cause of her broken heart.
I was her heartbreak, and I could feel her pull away from me. The feeling in my chest of being stomped on.
“Come on babe, let’s go to another place. This one is infested with roaches.” I hear August say as I walk over to the table, security staring at me intently. I would love to smash my fist in all of their faces.
August looks at me, full of sorrow, “ I’m still willing to take fifty percent of you Grayson.”
