It was a trial to my feelings, on the next day but one, to see Joe arraying himself in his Sunday clothes to accompany me to Miss Havishamโs. However, as he thought his court-suit necessary to the occasion, it was not for me to tell him that he looked far better in his working-dress; the rather, because I knew he made himself so dreadfully uncomfortable, entirely on my account, and that it was for me he pulled up his shirt-collar so very high behind, that it made the hair on the crown of his head stand up like a tuft of feathers.
At breakfast-time my sister declared her intention of going to town with us, and being left at Uncle Pumblechookโs and called for โwhen we had done with our fine ladiesโโa way of putting the case, from which Joe appeared inclined to augur the worst. The forge was shut up for the day, and Joe inscribed in chalk upon the door (as it was his custom to do on the very rare occasions when he was not at work) the monosyllableย HOUT, accompanied by a sketch of an arrow supposed to be flying in the direction he had taken.
We walked to town, my sister leading the way in a very large beaver bonnet, and carrying a basket like the Great Seal of England in plaited Straw, a pair of pattens, a spare shawl, and an umbrella, though it was a fine bright day. I am not quite clear whether these articles were carried penitentially or ostentatiously; but I rather think they were displayed as articles of property,โmuch as Cleopatra or any other sovereign lady on the Rampage might exhibit her wealth in a pageant or procession.
When we came to Pumblechookโs, my sister bounced in and left us. As it was almost noon, Joe and I held straight on to Miss Havishamโs house. Estella opened the gate as usual, and, the moment she appeared, Joe took his hat off and stood weighing it by the brim in both his hands; as if he had some urgent reason in his mind for being particular to half a quarter of an ounce.
Estella took no notice of either of us, but led us the way that I knew so well. I followed next to her, and Joe came last. When I looked back at Joe in the long passage, he was still weighing his hat with the greatest care, and was coming after us in long strides on the tips of his toes.
Estella told me we were both to go in, so I took Joe by the coat-cuff and conducted him into Miss Havishamโs presence. She was seated at her dressing-table, and looked round at us immediately.
โOh!โ said she to Joe. โYou are the husband of the sister of this boy?โ
I could hardly have imagined dear old Joe looking so unlike himself or so like some extraordinary bird; standing as he did speechless, with his tuft of feathers ruffled, and his mouth open as if he wanted a worm.
โYou are the husband,โ repeated Miss Havisham, โof the sister of this boy?โ
It was very aggravating; but, throughout the interview, Joe persisted in addressing Me instead of Miss Havisham.
โWhich I meantersay, Pip,โ Joe now observed in a manner that was at once expressive of forcible argumentation, strict confidence, and great politeness, โas I hup and married your sister, and I were at the time what you might call (if you was anyways inclined) a single man.โ
โWell!โ said Miss Havisham. โAnd you have reared the boy, with the intention of taking him for your apprentice; is that so, Mr. Gargery?โ
โYou know, Pip,โ replied Joe, โas you and me were ever friends, and it were looked forโard to betwixt us, as being calcโlated to lead to larks. Not but what, Pip, if you had ever made objections to the business,โsuch as its being open to black and sut, or such-like,โnot but what they would have been attended to, donโt you see?โ
โHas the boy,โ said Miss Havisham, โever made any objection? Does he like the trade?โ
โWhich it is well beknown to yourself, Pip,โ returned Joe, strengthening his former mixture of argumentation, confidence, and politeness, โthat it were the wish of your own hart.โ (I saw the idea suddenly break upon him that he would adapt his epitaph to the occasion, before he went on to say) โAnd there werenโt no objection on your part, and Pip it were the great wish of your hart!โ
It was quite in vain for me to endeavour to make him sensible that he ought to speak to Miss Havisham. The more I made faces and gestures to him to do it, the more confidential, argumentative, and polite, he persisted in being to Me.
โHave you brought his indentures with you?โ asked Miss Havisham.
โWell, Pip, you know,โ replied Joe, as if that were a little unreasonable, โyou yourself see me put โem in my โat, and therefore you know as they are here.โ With which he took them out, and gave them, not to Miss Havisham, but to me. I am afraid I was ashamed of the dear good fellow,โIย knowย I was ashamed of him,โwhen I saw that Estella stood at the back of Miss Havishamโs chair, and that her eyes laughed mischievously. I took the indentures out of his hand and gave them to Miss Havisham.
โYou expected,โ said Miss Havisham, as she looked them over, โno premium with the boy?โ
โJoe!โ I remonstrated, for he made no reply at all. โWhy donโt you answerโโ
โPip,โ returned Joe, cutting me short as if he were hurt, โwhich I meantersay that were not a question requiring a answer betwixt yourself and me, and which you know the answer to be full well No. You know it to be No, Pip, and wherefore should I say it?โ
Miss Havisham glanced at him as if she understood what he really was better than I had thought possible, seeing what he was there; and took up a little bag from the table beside her.
โPip has earned a premium here,โ she said, โand here it is. There are five-and-twenty guineas in this bag. Give it to your master, Pip.โ
As if he were absolutely out of his mind with the wonder awakened in him by her strange figure and the strange room, Joe, even at this pass, persisted in addressing me.
โThis is wery liberal on your part, Pip,โ said Joe, โand it is as such received and grateful welcome, though never looked for, far nor near, nor nowheres. And now, old chap,โ said Joe, conveying to me a sensation, first of burning and then of freezing, for I felt as if that familiar expression were applied to Miss Havisham,โโand now, old chap, may we do our duty! May you and me do our duty, both on us, by one and another, and by them which your liberal presentโhave-conweyedโto beโfor the satisfaction of mind-ofโthem as neverโโ here Joe showed that he felt he had fallen into frightful difficulties, until he triumphantly rescued himself with the words, โand from myself far be it!โ These words had such a round and convincing sound for him that he said them twice.
โGood-bye, Pip!โ said Miss Havisham. โLet them out, Estella.โ
โAm I to come again, Miss Havisham?โ I asked.
โNo. Gargery is your master now. Gargery! One word!โ
Thus calling him back as I went out of the door, I heard her say to Joe in a distinct emphatic voice, โThe boy has been a good boy here, and that is his reward. Of course, as an honest man, you will expect no other and no more.โ
How Joe got out of the room, I have never been able to determine; but I know that when he did get out he was steadily proceeding upstairs instead of coming down, and was deaf to all remonstrances until I went after him and laid hold of him. In another minute we were outside the gate, and it was locked, and Estella was gone. When we stood in the daylight alone again, Joe backed up against a wall, and said to me, โAstonishing!โ And there he remained so long saying, โAstonishingโ at intervals, so often, that I began to think his senses were never coming back. At length he prolonged his remark into โPip, I do assureย youย this is as-TON-ishing!โ and so, by degrees, became conversational and able to walk away.
I have reason to think that Joeโs intellects were brightened by the encounter they had passed through, and that on our way to Pumblechookโs he invented a subtle and deep design. My reason is to be found in what took place in Mr. Pumblechookโs parlour: where, on our presenting ourselves, my sister sat in conference with that detested seedsman.
โWell?โ cried my sister, addressing us both at once. โAnd whatโs happened toย you? I wonder you condescend to come back to such poor society as this, I am sure I do!โ
โMiss Havisham,โ said Joe, with a fixed look at me, like an effort of remembrance, โmade it wery partickโler that we should give herโwere it compliments or respects, Pip?โ
โCompliments,โ I said.
โWhich that were my own belief,โ answered Joe; โher compliments to Mrs. J. Gargeryโโ
โMuch good theyโll do me!โ observed my sister; but rather gratified too.
โAnd wishing,โ pursued Joe, with another fixed look at me, like another effort of remembrance, โthat the state of Miss Havishamโs elth were sitch as would haveโallowed, were it, Pip?โ
โOf her having the pleasure,โ I added.
โOf ladiesโ company,โ said Joe. And drew a long breath.
โWell!โ cried my sister, with a mollified glance at Mr. Pumblechook. โShe might have had the politeness to send that message at first, but itโs better late than never. And what did she give young Rantipole here?โ
โShe givโ him,โ said Joe, โnothing.โ
Mrs. Joe was going to break out, but Joe went on.
โWhat she givโ,โ said Joe, โshe givโ to his friends. โAnd by his friends,โ were her explanation, โI mean into the hands of his sister Mrs. J. Gargery.โ Them were her words; โMrs. J. Gargery.โ She maynโt have knowโd,โ added Joe, with an appearance of reflection, โwhether it were Joe, or Jorge.โ
My sister looked at Pumblechook: who smoothed the elbows of his wooden arm-chair, and nodded at her and at the fire, as if he had known all about it beforehand.
โAnd how much have you got?โ asked my sister, laughing. Positively laughing!
โWhat would present company say to ten pound?โ demanded Joe.
โTheyโd say,โ returned my sister, curtly, โpretty well. Not too much, but pretty well.โ
โItโs more than that, then,โ said Joe.
That fearful Impostor, Pumblechook, immediately nodded, and said, as he rubbed the arms of his chair, โItโs more than that, Mum.โ
โWhy, you donโt mean to sayโโ began my sister.
โYes I do, Mum,โ said Pumblechook; โbut wait a bit. Go on, Joseph. Good in you! Go on!โ
โWhat would present company say,โ proceeded Joe, โto twenty pound?โ
โHandsome would be the word,โ returned my sister.
โWell, then,โ said Joe, โItโs more than twenty pound.โ
That abject hypocrite, Pumblechook, nodded again, and said, with a patronizing laugh, โItโs more than that, Mum. Good again! Follow her up, Joseph!โ
โThen to make an end of it,โ said Joe, delightedly handing the bag to my sister; โitโs five-and-twenty pound.โ
โItโs five-and-twenty pound, Mum,โ echoed that basest of swindlers, Pumblechook, rising to shake hands with her; โand itโs no more than your merits (as I said when my opinion was asked), and I wish you joy of the money!โ
If the villain had stopped here, his case would have been sufficiently awful, but he blackened his guilt by proceeding to take me into custody, with a right of patronage that left all his former criminality far behind.
โNow you see, Joseph and wife,โ said Pumblechook, as he took me by the arm above the elbow, โI am one of them that always go right through with what theyโve begun. This boy must be bound, out of hand. Thatโsย myย way. Bound out of hand.โ
โGoodness knows, Uncle Pumblechook,โ said my sister (grasping the money), โweโre deeply beholden to you.โ
โNever mind me, Mum,โ returned that diabolical cornchandler. โA pleasureโs a pleasure all the world over. But this boy, you know; we must have him bound. I said Iโd see to itโto tell you the truth.โ
The Justices were sitting in the Town Hall near at hand, and we at once went over to have me bound apprentice to Joe in the Magisterial presence. I say we went over, but I was pushed over by Pumblechook, exactly as if I had that moment picked a pocket or fired a rick; indeed, it was the general impression in Court that I had been taken red-handed; for, as Pumblechook shoved me before him through the crowd, I heard some people say, โWhatโs he done?โ and others, โHeโs a young โun, too, but looks bad, donโt he?โ One person of mild and benevolent aspect even gave me a tract ornamented with a woodcut of a malevolent young man fitted up with a perfect sausage-shop of fetters, and entitled TO BE READ IN MYย CELL.
The Hall was a queer place, I thought, with higher pews in it than a church,โand with people hanging over the pews looking on,โand with mighty Justices (one with a powdered head) leaning back in chairs, with folded arms, or taking snuff, or going to sleep, or writing, or reading the newspapers,โand with some shining black portraits on the walls, which my unartistic eye regarded as a composition of hardbake and sticking-plaster. Here, in a corner my indentures were duly signed and attested, and I was โboundโ; Mr. Pumblechook holding me all the while as if we had looked in on our way to the scaffold, to have those little preliminaries disposed of.
When we had come out again, and had got rid of the boys who had been put into great spirits by the expectation of seeing me publicly tortured, and who were much disappointed to find that my friends were merely rallying round me, we went back to Pumblechookโs. And there my sister became so excited by the twenty-five guineas, that nothing would serve her but we must have a dinner out of that windfall at the Blue Boar, and that Pumblechook must go over in his chaise-cart, and bring the Hubbles and Mr. Wopsle.
It was agreed to be done; and a most melancholy day I passed. For, it inscrutably appeared to stand to reason, in the minds of the whole company, that I was an excrescence on the entertainment. And to make it worse, they all asked me from time to time,โin short, whenever they had nothing else to do,โwhy I didnโt enjoy myself? And what could I possibly do then, but say Iย wasย enjoying myself,โwhen I wasnโt!
However, they were grown up and had their own way, and they made the most of it. That swindling Pumblechook, exalted into the beneficent contriver of the whole occasion, actually took the top of the table; and, when he addressed them on the subject of my being bound, and had fiendishly congratulated them on my being liable to imprisonment if I played at cards, drank strong liquors, kept late hours or bad company, or indulged in other vagaries which the form of my indentures appeared to contemplate as next to inevitable, he placed me standing on a chair beside him to illustrate his remarks.
My only other remembrances of the great festival are, That they wouldnโt let me go to sleep, but whenever they saw me dropping off, woke me up and told me to enjoy myself. That, rather late in the evening Mr. Wopsle gave us Collinsโs ode, and threw his bloodstained sword in thunder down, with such effect, that a waiter came in and said, โThe Commercials underneath sent up their compliments, and it wasnโt the Tumblersโ Arms.โ That, they were all in excellent spirits on the road home, and sang, O Lady Fair! Mr. Wopsle taking the bass, and asserting with a tremendously strong voice (in reply to the inquisitive bore who leads that piece of music in a most impertinent manner, by wanting to know all about everybodyโs private affairs) thatย heย was the man with his white locks flowing, and that he was upon the whole the weakest pilgrim going.
Finally, I remember that when I got into my little bedroom, I was truly wretched, and had a strong conviction on me that I should never like Joeโs trade. I had liked it once, but once was not now.