I hug Dancer so hard his back cracks. He taps me in panic. I apologize and separate, feeling large as a Telemanus next to him. Outside the garage-turned-makeshift-o ce, the Sons of Ares warehouse rattles with industry. They brought me in through the side door and had me wait for Dancer among old engines and rusted aerlons.
Dancer pulls back from me and looks up, rusty eyes glittering with tears. Startling to think that I once considered him a handsome man. Heโs in his forties; old for a Red. Hair shot with gray. Face creased by age and hardship. His right arm still hangs limp. His foot still drags. And his smile still stretches wide enough, baring uneven, imperfect teeth.
โMy boy,โ he says, gripping my shoulder with his left hand. Itโs stronger than all the rest of him put together. He smells like tobacco. Nails are yellow. โMy bloodydamn beautiful little bastard of a boy. You look so bloody grand!โ He laughs and laughs again, shaking his head. โThere are no words. Iโm sorry I couldnโt reach you. Sorry I let Harmony use you like that. There are so many things, Darrow.โ
โStop.โ I clap the back of his neck. โWeโre brothers. No need for apologies. Weโre bound by blood and past. But please, please donโt let it happen again.โ He nods. โHow is my family, do you know?โ
โAlive,โ he says. โStill in the mines. I know. I know. But thatโs the safest place for them with this war abound. No one wants to
blow up Marsโs industry. Register?โ
He waves me to a seat. โDonโt know many Golds, but that Sevroโs a nasty little shit. When I delivered his fatherโs instructions to him out on the Rim, I thought he was going to cut me from gob to pucker.โ He lights a burner, winks at me. โNever met anyone like him.โ
โHeโs loyal as they come,โ I say. โLike you.โ
โNo! I mean he can swear better than any bloodydamn Red.โ โSevro swears?โ I smile. โGuess you get used to it. Though he
does like saying โbloodyโ a hell of a lot now.โ
โItโs a fine word. Rolls off the tongue. Done some research.โ He puffs up his chest. โBeen with us since the first ancestors, you know. The first Golds, the ones with normal eyes and gold uniforms, took most of the early recruits from the poor bastards from the Irish isles after the radiation from London turned the isles into a wasteland. The Golds took the highly skilled migratory workforce and recruited them to be the first Pioneers. Their slang just stuck around, jumbled up a bit. Historyโs fascinating, isnโt she?โ
โHarmonyโs been making up her own history,โ I say.
โThatโs right. Iโm dead!โ He shakes his head and lights another burner, flicking the other onto the floor. I pick it up and put it in the wastebasket. โShe went her own way about a year after you left. We discovered several Senators were going to be vacationing on the Gorgon Sea. So we showed up to bug their villa to see if we couldnโt get any secrets. We didnโt. tust lots of โฆ depraved shit. And that was that, we thought. But not for Harmony. On the last night, she walked in and killed the Senators and their guests. Then she left us.โ
โSo there was never a lurcher squad that raided your headquarters?โ
He shakes his head. โThey came because of her. Killed about forty Sons. But sheโd already left for Luna. Ares saved us. Came in hard with a mixed pack of Obsidians and Grays. Laid waste to those lurchers, then slipped away before reinforcements came. Itโs lucky he killed them all. No way they wouldnโt know he was a Gold after that. Had our first face-to-face that day. Manโs bloodydamn scary.โ
โNot the word Iโd choose.โ Though maybe itโs accurate considering how well he fooled me. โIt doesnโt bother you that heโs a Gold?โ
โIt doesnโt bother him that weโre Reds. Ares would die for the cause, Darrow. Shit. He started it. You know why he did?โ
I shake my head.
โItโs his story.โ Dancer traces the pitviper bites on his neck. โA man has the right to tell his own story. But his isnโt a happy one. Sad as yours. Sad as mine. Strip a man of what he loves, and what is left? tust hate. tust anger. But he was the first to know there could be something more. He found me. He found you. Who the bloodydamn are we to question him?โ
The door opens suddenly. We both turn and Mickey limps in. He looks half dead, thin as a reed, paler than before. Without a word, he hobbles over to me and kisses me full on the mouth, his affection desperate and true. Then he starts weeping like a child. Dancer and I donโt know what to do, so I just wrap my arms around him and let him cry. He whispers โThank youโ to me a dozen times.
What did they do to him? Never mind. I know the things the Grays are trained in to get information. He says he told them nothing. Still, I have to discover what the tackal learned from this. What deductions heโs made from finding Mickeyโs lab.
I look over Mickeyโs head to see Fitchner standing there, smiling sadly. After a long moment, Mickey pulls back. โI tried to warn you, when you came to us on Luna,โ he says apologetically. โWanted to say to run. But she would have killed me if I said any more. I was afraid you would believe her over me.โ
โI would have believed you, Mickey.โ
โYou would have?โ He snimes. โI knew youโd come for me. I said my darling boy was too kind to forget about Mickey, but she spat on me. Said I was a slaver.โ He hangs his head, sni ng and so vulnerable, drained and nearly mad from what must have been done to him in the tackalโs torture chambers. โShe was right. I am. I am wicked. I hurt the girls and boys. I sold them even when I loved them. Of course she was right. Why would you come? Why would you do anything for wicked little Mickey?โ
โBecause youโre my friend.โ I bring his hands to my lips, kissing them gently as he looks up at me with hopeful eyes. โWeird as you are, wicked as you were. I know you want to be better. You want to live for more. We all do. And thereโs not a place they could take one of my friends that I would ever abandon them.โ
It feels good to speak the truth.
โThank you, my prince,โ he says quietly. He draws himself up after that, strong enough to turn and walk out of the o ce. Fitchner closes the door.
โWell, that was emotional.โ
I nod. This is the man Iโd rather be. Not constantly on guard. Not lying through my teeth. I suppose I didnโt even know how much affection I felt for Mickey till now. Itโs not because he helped make me. Itโs that heโs always loved me so much. Even if it was a strange sort of love, it was real. And I do believe he wants to be a man he thinks I would respect. tust like I want to be a man Eo and Mustang would respect. And thatโs the good sort of love.
โWe need to talk, Fitchner,โ I say. We didnโt have a chance earlier. Sevro came to me with Dancerโs planโcall a meeting, attach the Sons to my ship, let them infiltrate the building. All I did was suggest Sun-hwa as the scapegoat, and let them know Victra was not to be harmed.
โIโll leave you two to it,โ Dancer says, pushing back his metal chair.
โNo, I want you to stay,โ I say. โIโve too many secrets from too many people. I wonโt have any more between the three of us.โ
โLearn to count, shithead,โ Sevro says, coming around a rusted engine block. The cheap metal door to the outside slams behind him. Smells like autumn even in Ageaโs oil-stained manufacturing district. He hops onto the rusted chassis of an old fighter and sits with his legs dangling. โHey, look, itโs all pricks for once. Letโs tell sexist jokes.โ
Chuckling, I turn to Fitchner. โSo youโre Ares.โ
โMan comes out of a coma and heโs a genius!โ Fitchner barks. He claps his hands, but his eyes stay deadly serious. โMost call
me Bronzie. Students call me Proctor. Some call me Rage Knight. The Sovereign calls me traitor. My son calls me shithead.โฆโ
โYou are a shithead,โ Sevro chimes in.
โโฆ My wife called me Fitchner. But the Golds made me Ares.โ Before now I would not know what that meant. He is Gold.
How could the Golds do anything to him? But now Iโve peeked behind the curtain. โWhy didnโt you tell me who you were from the start?โ
โAnd put my life in the hands of a teenagerโs acting ability?โ he cackles. โI think not. If you were found out and they tortured you โฆ bad news. I had alternate plans, other irons in the fire. You just happened to be my favorite. But we mustnโt be biased.โ
โWho was your wife?โ I ask, already suspecting the answer. โFull or short story?โ he asks.
โFull.โ
โI was liaising for a terraforming company on Triton,โ he begins grumy. โI didnโt have a glamorous job like you. No razors. No armor. tust construction management. Contract was leased by a Silver. I was running one of the last Lovelock Engines on their north pole when an eruption from one of that moonโs damn geysers caused an earthquake. Cracked the ice crust. Spilled the whole engine into the subterranean sea. Three thousand souls drowned.
โThey fished me out of the sea and I spent the next months recovering in the arctic hospital. I was in the highColor wing. We had the good food. Better showers. Newer beds. But the lowColors had the window that looked at the northern lights. And she had the bed beside that window.โ
He looks up at Sevro. โShe was the most beautiful woman Iโve ever met. And she was pretty to look at too. She lost a leg in the accident. And they werenโt going to give her a new one. They could. Itโs simple bionics. Not cost-effective, said the Coppers. Shittiest Color ever made, I swear onโโ
Sevro clears his throat. โWe know.โ
Fitchner throws a piece of trash at Sevro and continues. โWhen I left, I took her with me. Iโd saved up money enough to leave Triton. Couldnโt live in the Core. Too expensive. So I chose Mars. We lived just outside New Thebes for a year. We wanted a child
more than anything. But our DNA wasnโt compatible. So we went to a Carver to see if we couldnโt make some magic. We did. Cost me almost everything I owned, but nine months later, this little Goblin squirmed out.โ
Sevro waves from his perch as he examines the trash to see if it isnโt edible.
โTwo years later, the Board of Quality Control busted the Carver for some work he did on some Obsidian gladiator and he ratted us out, fastlike, for a reduced sentence. They came to our home when I was away with Sevro. Found my wife, took her in for questioning. Their doctors saw her fallopian tubes had been modified so that she would be compatible to sire a Gold child. Then they disposed of her. Says so right in the records: โdisposed.โ Gassed her with achlys-9, put her in an oven, pumped her ash into the sea. They didnโt even give her a name, just a number. Not because she was a thief or a murderer or had violated any manโs or womanโs rights, but because she was a Red who dared love a Gold. My selfish love killed her.
โIt wasnโt like your wife, Darrow. I didnโt watch mine die. I didnโt see Golds come into my world and ruin it. Instead I felt the coldness of the system swallow the only thing I lived for. A Copper pressing buttons, filling out a spreadsheet. A Brown twisting a knob to release gas. They killed my wife. But they wonโt ever think so. Sheโs not a memory in their mind. Sheโs a statistic. Itโs as if she never existed. Some ghost I loved but no one else ever saw. Thatโs what Society doesโspread the blame so there is no villain, so itโs futile to even begin to find a villain, to find justice. Itโs just machinery. Processes. And it rumbles on, inexorable till a whole generation rises that will throw themselves on the gears.โ
โWhat was her name?โ
โHer name? Why does it matter?โ he asks warily. โBecause I want to remember her.โ
โBryn,โ Sevro says from above. โMy motherโs name was Bryn. She was twenty-two when they killed her.โ Only a year older than I am now.
โBryn,โ I repeat the word and see Fitchner rock slightly on his feet. A shortness of breath.
โSo youโre half Red,โ I say to Sevro.
Sevro nods. โFound out couple days ago. Weird as shit, righto?โ โWeird as shit. Youโll make a good Ruster.โ
โI like to think Iโm an endangered species.โ
Dancer rolls a match through his fingers. โWe all are.โ โYou knew about Titus,โ I say to Fitchner.
โBut Dancer didnโt. Donโt blame him for that. I thought youโd be brothers at the Institute. A natural affection for your own race. But he went dark, and there was no way to reel him in. I met with himโjammer, ghostCloakโlike I met with you. But his mind broke under the strain. I didnโt want to see you break.โ
โI did break.โ I look over at Sevro, Dancer. โI just had friends to piece me back together. Why didnโt you tell Titus and me about each other?โ
โThen his mistakes would have been yours and yours would have been his. In a storm, you donโt tie two boats together. Theyโll drag each other down.โ He clears his throat.
โI always knew a Gold couldnโt lead this rebellion. It has to be from the bottom up, boyo. Red is about family. More than any other Color, it is about love amid all the horror of our world. If Red rises, they have a chance to bind the worlds together. MidColors wonโt. Pinks, Browns, canโt. Obsidians have failed before. And if they succeeded alone, theyโd break the worlds instead of freeing them.โ
โSo whatโs the plan?โ I ask. โI squabbed up your position next to the Sovereign.โ
โYouโre hard to manipulate, Darrow, so Iโll just cut to it.
Augustus is going to adopt you. Youโre not surprised.โฆโ
โIt would make sense. He wants to tie my fate to his family. Probably make me marry Mustang. Itโll fracture my alliance with the tackal if I become an heir, though.โ
โDoes the tackal care about that?โ Sevro asks. โSeems like heโs abandoned hope of ever gaining approval. Bloody bastardโs building his own empire.โ
โIโll have to see,โ I say.
Fitchner continues. โDispose of the tackal or make him part of the plan, it doesnโt matter. Augustus will adopt you as his heir. And he will use you as a Praetor in his armada. And if you defeat
the Sovereign, he wonโt settle for being King of Mars. Heโll want to be Sovereign himself. Help him be. And a year into his reign, Sevro will kill him and pin it on a rival, maybe the tackal.โฆโ
My turn to rock on my feet.
โYou want me to inherit the empire,โ I guess. โThe entire Society.โ
I gawk at him. At Dancer. How can they look so serious?
โYes,โ Fitchner says. โAfter he dies, all will look to the strongest. Be the strongest. Win the game of succession and you can be Sovereign just as you were Primus. tust as you are Praetor. Itโs all games. Except this time weโre helpingย youย cheat. We will feed you information, guard you against assassination attempts. With me on your side, you will have a spy network even the tackal and Sovereign cannot rival. We will bribe who we need to bribe and kill who we need to kill.โ
I sit reflectively looking at my hands. โI thought the lies were nearly over. I want to declare what I am. I want to declare war.โ
โWe canโt yet. You know that.โ
I do, but I donโt want to leave these people. โI wonโt be in the dark again. We will communicate. We will plan. No more gray areas. Do you understand? I canโt be alone like before.โ
โSay yes, Fitchner,โ Sevro says. โOr Iโm not going either.โ โWeโll communicate every day, if you need. I canโt come with
you. Thereโs a ghost war being fought that I have to manage. But in my stead, Iโll send some of my best agents. Youโll have a cabal you can trust. Spies. Assassins. Courtesans. Hackers. All with perfect covers. All willing to die to break the chains. You are no longer alone.โ
Relief fills me. But thereโs something I know I canโt do. โI have to go back.โ
โYes. Theyโll be wondering where you are,โ Fitchner agrees. โNo.โ I say. โI have to go home.โ
โHome?โ Dancer asks. โTo Lykos?โ
โWhy?โ Fitchner asks. โWhatโs left for you there?โ
โMy family. Itโs been four years. I need to see them before this begins.โ I look each man in the eyes, each so scarred and so wounded in his own way. โYou have to understand that. Things are about to break apart in ways we canโt predict. We pretend we
know what weโre doing, pushing these Golds to war. Planning our own. Like we can control it, but we canโt. Weโre just mortals opening Pandoraโs box. And before everything turns upside down, I need to remember what Iโm fighting for. I need to know itโs worth it.โ
โYou want their blessing,โ Dancer says. โHer blessing.โ He knows my heart better than Fitchner. If Iโm to let Augustus adopt me, then I must go home first.
โYou canโt tell them what you are. They wonโt understand.โ Fitchner steps forward, suddenly cautious of my temper. โYou know that.โ
โHow much easier would this have all been if you and I had conspired the whole way through?โ I say. โLies breed lies. We have to trust.โ I look at Sevro. โIโm taking her to Lykos.โ
โHer?โ Dancer asks. โMustang,โ Sevro murmurs.
โNo,โ Fitchner almost yells. โAbsolutely not. No. Itโs not worth the risk. Youโre set up now. Sheโs in love with you! Donโt lose that leverage because of a guilty conscience.โ
โAnd what if I love her too?โ
โShit,โ Fitchner curses. โShit. Shit. Shit. Youโre serious? I thought this was part of your gorydamn game. Shit. Boyo, youโll ruin everything. Gorydamn idiot. Shit.โ
โThisย isย everything,โ I say. โShe loves me. I wonโt use her
anymore. I wonโt leverage her. If I canโt trust her, Gold canโt change, and Titus and Harmony were right. Hell, the Society is right. You and I know that itโs not about our Color; itโs about our hearts. Now letโs put that to the test.โ
โAnd if youโre wrong? If she rejects you for them?โ I donโt have an answer.
Sevro hops down from his perch. โThen I put a bullet in her head.โ