I flip the green chip over, studying the writing etched into the curved edge. After spending three months in AA, I feel stronger than ever. Everything seems to be going well for me. Once I show the chip to Leo, I’m ready to move on with my life and leave the will in the past.
“Are you still committed to staying sober?” My father stands next to me. The last stragglers leave the meeting room, leaving me alone with him.
“Why do you care?” “I don’t.”
I let out a soft laugh as I stand up. My head clears his by a couple of inches. “You know what I find interesting?”
His dark gaze peers out at me. “That?”
“I spent most of my life always making excuses for you. I thought if you got sober, you’d be better. Kinder _ But it turns out that you are the same miserable person with or without alcohol. And do you know why?”
His eyes narrow. “I’m sure you’ll tell me if I care or not.” “You hate yourself, and no amount of alcohol is going to change that. You are a pathetic person with equally pathetic desires who will never find happiness, whether you look for it at the bottom of a bottle or with an inheritance you don’t deserve.” With one last look at my father, I walk away, leaving him burning a hole in my back.
It wasn’t until I confronted my self-hatred that I realized my father and I shared the same problem. That he and I were two sides of the same coin, turning our self-hatred into a weapon: him against the world and me against myself.
But unlike him, I’m here because I refuse to give up. Not today. Not tomorrow. Never more.
 |
Since I’m already in Chicago for the AA meeting, I decide to stay the night and attend the board meeting the next day. As much as I want to return to Lake Wisteria, there are a few things I need to do before I can do so.
Declan sits at the head of the table, taking my father’s usual spot.
“Where’s Seth?” asks the head of product development.
“I will be standing as CEO for the time being.” Declan doesn’t look up from his phone.
“And how long is that?” someone else asks. “Indefinitely.” Declan doesn’t blink.
Rowan gives me a puzzled look. I purse my lips to stop myself from smiling. Declan wanted to surprise Rowan about the pregnancy after today’s meeting while Iris has lunch with Zahra now to share the news.
The meeting is brief. Business is good and everything works as it should, except that Seth is no longer sitting at the head of the table.
When Arnold, the Head of Acquisitions and Sales of the DreamStream Division, stands up and gives his monthly report, I keep my mouth shut. Rowan nudges me once, but I ignore him. I’ve spent the last three months talking to Arnold privately, not that my brother knows.
It turned out that the solution was not to try to fit into a company role, but to develop a role that suited me, my needs, and my interests. While I want to help the streaming company be the best version of itself, I don’t want to be in charge of the whole damn thing. Leadership is not my style. Becoming a consultant or something less mandatory is more my speed, while also giving me the ability to speak on behalf of the company and acquire new projects.
Once the meeting is over, I take Arnold aside to schedule our next meeting with his team. I don’t have an assistant or anything fancy, so I coordinate everything myself.
My brothers stay, whispering behind my back. It’s not until the room empties that I finally face them.
I turn around and cross my arms. “Have you finished talking about me?”
“What was that?” Declan gestures towards the spot Arnold just occupied.
“Don’t worry about that”.
His eyes light up. “Are you already keeping secrets from your new CEO?” Rowan’s jaw drops. “Is he official?”
Declan gives him a look. “Not until the attorney draws up the final paperwork.”
I smile “Congratulations, daddy.”
Rowan chokes on his inhale.
Declan’s eyes narrow. “Call me that again and I won’t hesitate to rip out your tongue and mount it behind my new desk like a piece of art.”
Rowan’s eyes bounce between the two of us. “Does anyone want to fill me in on what’s going on?”
Declan takes out his wallet and hands Rowan a photo of the ultrasound. “Here.”
“Holy shit. You’re going to be a dad”. Rowan traces the circle. “It looks like a jelly bean.”
“Say hello to your nephew.” Declan preens like a peacock showing off his feathers. It’s the least Declan-like behavior I’ve ever seen, which just makes me laugh.
“It could be a girl,” I joke.
Declan touches his chest. “I have a good intuition and my gut tells me that he is a boy.”
Rowan’s eyes roll. “What if she is a girl?”
“I already have a cardiologist on speed dial and every Chicago police captain on my payroll to arrest anyone who steps within six feet of her.
“You can’t arrest every guy or girl you’re interested in,” I say.
He takes the photo from Rowan’s hands as he looks at me. “Look at me.”
|
My car is packed and I’m ready to head back to Lake Wisteria when I get a call from Leo asking me to come to his office for an emergency meeting. Before taking off toward Leo’s office across town, I text Lana to let her know something came up and I’m not sure I’ll be able to make it home tonight.
I spent the entire trip restless with anxiety. When I walk into his office, my nervousness is only amplified when I find my brothers staring.
at my father from opposite sides of the living room.
Leo sits behind his desk with a neutral expression. Callahan. Please take a seat.”
He points to the only empty spot next to my father. I sit up, practically hugging the edge of the leather couch to avoid him.
“I’m glad everyone was available tonight to meet with me.” Leo opens a file.
As if we had any other option.
“What is this all about?” My father’s voice hints at his growing temper.
“I was asked to read one last letter from Brady.” “Another letter?” Rowan sits down.
Leo tilts his head in confirmation. “This one was directed at you four.”
Declan remains silent, his gaze glued to Leo removing the letter from an envelope.
“To my family,” Leo begins. “A man’s legacy should not be determined by the amount of money he made or the success he had, but by the memory he left and the way he made people feel.” Leo pauses to look up from the letter.
“That?” Declan growls.
“Sorry. Your grandfather noted that he should pause for dramatic effect.”
I explode with laughter. Rowan and Declan follow us, the three of them filling the entire room with the sounds of our fun. My father remains rigid at my side, completely emotionless.
Leo continues, his lips pulling upwards. “My way of making you four earn your inheritance was unusual. Leo warned me when I called him at two in the morning after a crazy dream, to tell him I needed to review the will. He stops again to look up. “I did. Just for the record.”
“Stop the useless talk and read the damn letter,” our father barks.
Leo doesn’t resist or break, although a small twitch appears in his jaw. He refuses to pay attention to my father as he returns to his reading. “Each of you were assigned a task that I chose based on your strengths and weaknesses. Since Leo is reading this letter instead of the other one I wrote, I assume that the four of you met the requirements asked of you to receive your inheritances.
Leo takes a second sheet of paper out of the envelope. “To my son, Seth. I gave you two options regarding your inheritance. While I expected you to accept the challenge and choose the harder path, you chose the easier option of the two.”
What two options? Were they like mine and based on contingencies, or were he given two clear paths from the beginning and it was up to him to choose?
My father’s foot trembles, his only nervous sign.
“I understand why he chose to be sober to receive his shares in the company. I really understand it. Just as I understand that I cannot hand them over in good conscience, knowing that you made that decision to benefit yourself.”
That. The actual. Shit? Are parts of our inheritance now revocable? Blood pours from Declan’s face. We look into each other’s eyes for a moment before returning our attention to Leo, who continues reading the page. “If you have truly changed, then your children will make the appropriate decision that reflects that transformation. If you have not made amends for the mistakes you have made and the damage you have caused, then you never really learned anything despite my letters and pleadings, and therefore you are not worthy of receiving your inheritance.
“Son of a bitch,” my father whispers under his breath. “Well played, dad.”
Leo ignores her comment. “To my three grandchildren. In addition to receiving your percentages of the company and your inheritance, I grant you one last thing that I denied you before. An election. “You can choose to deny your father six percent of the company’s shares and redistribute them to investors, or you can choose to give him the shares.”
Holy shit.
Holy. Damned. Shit.
My gaze darts to Rowan and Declan. They both sit with their elbows on their knees and their chins cradled on their clasped hands. “Whatever you three decide, I hope you learn from your father’s example. What can be given can easily be taken away. Fortunes. Lovers. Family. Don’t make the same selfish mistakes we made because I can guarantee you that it leads to nothing but an empty life and an equally empty heart.”
“And to my son, I hope you change out of the goodness of your heart before it’s too late for you.”
Leo folds the letter and puts it back in the envelope.
“Can I have the other letter you wrote?” my father asks, surprising us all with his question.
Leo raises an eyebrow. “It has no legal value.” “I know that.”
Leo takes out a third folded sheet of paper and hands it to my father. He does not read it in our presence, but instead chooses to keep it inside his suit with a trembling hand.
Leo puts his hands together. “Each of you will vote yes or no regarding your father’s inheritance. We will start with the oldest grandson.”
Declan stands up and buttons his suit. Instead of sharing his feelings out loud, my brother leans in to whisper something in my father’s ear. The color drains from my father’s face. I’m not sure what Declan is saying, but it looks like my dad saw a ghost.
Declan returns to his full height. “I vote no.” He leaves the room, leaving us behind to make our own decisions.
My father turns a fraction of an inch in my direction.
I’m not ready to speak my truth yet, so I stumble over my words. “Can Rowan be next?”
Leo looks at my brother.
Rowan shrugs before standing up. “Honestly, I’m disappointed that you didn’t choose the harder path. “After abusing us for years and using our weaknesses against us, it turns out that you are the weakest of us all.” Rowan shakes his head at Leo. “I vote no.” He leaves the room and closes the door behind him.
My father gets up from his seat and bends over to pick up his suitcase.
I’m not surprised by your dismissal of me. I spent the last thirty-four years of my life subjected to the same treatment, although I am better equipped to handle it now. “What happens to my vote?”
He stands tall. “It doesn’t matter.”
My blood heats beneath my skin, fueling the rage building inside me. I enter his space and look into his eyes. “Despite your attempts to treat me as if I don’t exist, I am just as important as the other two.”
“It is not personal.”
“Maybe that’s your problem. “If you really acted like a human being, maybe things could have been different.”
His jaw clenches. “Vote or get out of my way.” “Once you tell me what the first choice was.” Her right eye twitches. “Because?”
“Because I want to know, and you owe me so much.”
He looks away, his jaw working as he considers my request. Her resigned sigh fills the silence, barely heard over the loud beat of my racing heart.
“He asked me to seek forgiveness from each of you and put my actions up to a family vote like today.” My father takes a step toward the door, but I reach out to stop him.
“Why didn’t you choose that option?”
“I didn’t want to risk the stock for something I knew was impossible after everything I had done.”
“Trying and failing is better than not trying at all.” I’d rather fail over and over again than limit my options and fail anyway.
It took me a long time to think that way, but I’m done choosing the easy route. Just look at my father and what that got him.
Nothing but misery.
You will have to spend the rest of your life wondering what would have happened if you had sought help and earned our forgiveness. While we live the rest of our lives happily with our families, he will sulk at his misery and failure, knowing deep down that there was a small chance that we would have learned to forgive him if he had tried.
But I guess none of us will ever know. I look at Leo. “I vote yes.”
Leo’s eyebrows jump and my father’s eyes widen. I know my vote is out, but I’d rather screw my dad one last time, making him wonder what he could have done to win that other yes.
Kill them with kindness , Mom always said. I hope my father drops dead because of that.
