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Chapter no 43 – Iโ€™M NOT IMMATURE, Iโ€™M GOOFY; THEREโ€™S A DIFFERENCE

Consider Me (Playing For Keeps, #1)

CARTER

โ€œI GOT ONE!โ€

โ€œWhat? Lemme see.โ€ I try to take Oliviaโ€™s fishing rod from her, but she twists away.

โ€œBack off!โ€ she yells, kicking her leg out, splashing water up at me. โ€œYouโ€™re gonna let it get away!โ€

โ€œNo Iโ€™m not!โ€ I reach for the rod again, but she dashes down the stream, reeling in her line as she goes. โ€œI know how to reel in a fish,ย Olivia!โ€

โ€œIโ€™d believe you if Iโ€™d seen you do it,ย Carter!โ€ Sheโ€™s got her tongue out, poking the corner of her mouth as she works, grunting, reeling, and when that salmon breaks the water, sheย a-haโ€™s, an arrogant beam spreading across her face. โ€œWhatโ€™s that now? Four for me, zero for you?โ€

โ€œShut up.โ€ I slosh water up at her, but she just giggles. Itโ€™s kinda maniacal and a little scary. โ€œItโ€™s โ€™cause I let you use my good rod.โ€

โ€œItโ€™s โ€™cause Iโ€™m better.โ€ She winks. โ€œAt using this rodย andย the one in your pants.โ€

โ€œOllie,โ€ I muse, half gasp, half guffaw, creeping toward her. โ€œIโ€™ve never been so attracted to you as I am right now.โ€

โ€œYouโ€™re always attracted to me,โ€ she murmurs, focused on prying the hook from her salmon.

This is true. Always.ย Always, always, always.ย Though thereโ€™s definitely something about standing in a stream, water up to her knees, her teensy denim shorts soaked through from all the splashing sheโ€™s been doing, holding a fish thatโ€™s, like, a third of her height in length that makes her especially s*xy right now.

Olivia grunts, lugging the big fish up, and when she slings it across her arms, she grins at me. โ€œCan you take a picture? So you can always

remember that I donโ€™t just kick your ass at beer pong, but at salmon fishing too.โ€

Thereโ€™s a rumble of protest in my throat, but it quickly spirals into a laugh as I snap her picture over and over again, and when Olivia sets the fish free, I wade over to a large rock and take a seat.

She sinks down beside me, sticking her head over my shoulder. โ€œDid you just add that to your secret spank bank folder?โ€

I tuck my phone into my pocket. โ€œYeah.โ€

โ€œItโ€™s a littleโ€ฆdifferentย than the normal pictures you put in there.โ€

โ€œYou look hot as fuck. Your legs are all wet and your smile is as cocky as mine.โ€ I lean into her, the tip of my nose grazing hers as my teeth press into my lower lip. โ€œI mean, if you wanna take off your clothes and let me fuck your throat right now, I can take a picture and add that one, too, pip- squeak. We donโ€™t have any outdoor pictures.โ€

โ€œThatโ€™s not true. I took a picture of you between my thighs on your balcony last week.โ€

โ€œOh yeah. Fuck. I ate like a king that day.โ€ I nudge her shoulder with mine. โ€œAnd stop calling itย mine. Itโ€™s yours too. Not just the balcony, the whole damn house.โ€

โ€œNot yet, not officially.โ€

I roll my eyes. โ€œItโ€™s been yours since you first stepped into it.โ€

Her cheeks tint pink. Itโ€™s adorable she still blushes sometimes. โ€œCarter.โ€ โ€œWhat? You belong there and you always have. Itโ€™s yours, whether or not youโ€™re waiting to officially be out of your house and never ever sleep

anywhere butย ourย bed again.โ€ โ€œNever ever?โ€

I brush a kiss across her lips. โ€œNever everย ever.โ€

For the first time, Olivia stayed at my house last weekend while I wasnโ€™t there. She was all nervous about it, but thereโ€™s something about knowing sheโ€™s puttering around my kitchen, lounging on my couches, sleeping in my bed while Iโ€™m away.

Itโ€™s been a month since she agreed to move in with me, and we finally listed her house last week. It sold in thirty-six hours for 25 percent over asking price because Vancouver real estate is on fire right now. It doesnโ€™t close until end of June, which means Iโ€™ve got another six-ish weeks to go of Olivia pretending like sheโ€™s only โ€œsleeping over.โ€

I canโ€™t wait to build our home together.

โ€œYou know,โ€ I say, leaning into her. โ€œCara and Emโ€™s wedding is that weekend.โ€

โ€œMhmm.โ€

โ€œSo weโ€™ll be too busy to move. And youโ€™ll be too busy hiding from Cara for at least two weeks before that.โ€

โ€œThis is true.โ€

โ€œSo maybe you should move in now.โ€

โ€œHmmโ€ฆโ€ Oliviaโ€™s lips purse, thumb skimming her chin like itโ€™s something she needs to think long and hard about it.

Ha. Long and hard. Thatโ€™s what sheโ€”no. No, Carter. Be more mature.

Oliviaโ€™s gaze narrows on mine. โ€œAre you thinking something dirty right now?โ€

Pressing my lips together, I shake my head. โ€œNuh-uh.โ€

โ€œWell, I donโ€™t know. Iโ€™m about to spend all summer with you, you know. Feels like I should soak up all this personal space before you invade it.โ€

A growl rumbles in my chest.

That thumb keeps skimming, and then she raises her palm in a half shrug. โ€œPlus, you only have seven fireplaces, and I was kinda hoping for an eโ€”โ€ Her words dissolve on my tongue as my mouth takes hers, and I lift her, setting her on my lap.

My palms scrape over her thighs, her hips, and I hug her to me. โ€œStay, please.โ€

Olivia takes my face in her hands, warm brown eyes sparkling in the sun. โ€œI donโ€™t want to rush the move itself, only because youโ€™re in the middle of play-offs. I want you to focus on that, not getting me moved out of my house. And itโ€™s the end of the school year. Iโ€™ve got exams and wrap-up to work on for these kids.โ€ She kisses the corner of my mouth, right where itโ€™s tugging down. โ€œBut Iโ€™ll stay, Carter. We can worry about moving things later, or a little bit at a time, when time permits. Okay?โ€

โ€œCompromise?โ€

She nods. โ€œCompromise.โ€

โ€œAnd I get to keep you forever? Can it start tonight?โ€ โ€œDo I have a choice?โ€

โ€œNo.โ€ I grip her waist as I leap to my feet and spin her in the air. โ€œWoo- hoo!โ€

Olivia giggles, slinging her arms around my neck. โ€œAre you ready to eat?โ€

My stomach takes its cue, growling. โ€œAlways.โ€

I carry her out of the water, where she takes a seat on the blanket we laid out earlier, right on the edge of the shore, and I start to get the fire ready in the pit.

โ€œYou know,โ€ Olivia starts, โ€œitโ€™s crazy because I grew up on a lake, but Iโ€™ve never had a shore lunch before.โ€

โ€œReally? My dad and I had them all the time.โ€ Itโ€™s why weโ€™re here after all. My dadโ€™s birthday is this week, and he used to take the entire week off work. Heโ€™d pull me from school for two days, then my sister for two days, followed by whisking my mom away for a long weekend. Weโ€™d finish on Sunday night, all of us, together at his favorite restaurant. He spent his birthday doing the things he loved most with the people he loved most. For him and me, after hockey, it was this. Hiking, fishing, lunches on the shore. I mentioned it to Olivia a week ago, how it was one of my favorite cluster of days each year, how I havenโ€™t done it since he passed, and the next morning she called me to tell me sheโ€™d taken a couple days off.

I fucking love her so much it hurts.

โ€œI know itโ€™s not the same, Carter, but are youโ€ฆโ€ She trails off, and when I glance over my shoulder, sheโ€™s fiddling with the edge of the blanket. She clears her throat. โ€œAre you having fun?โ€

My heart tugs in my chest. โ€œIโ€™m having so much fun here with you today, Ollie. It makes me feel like heโ€™s right here with us.โ€

Olivia smiles. โ€œI think he is. Always.โ€ โ€œI think so too.โ€

I get to work on lunch, filleting the salmon Olivia caught earlier this morning. She wanted to pack sandwiches in case we didnโ€™t catch anything, but I didnโ€™t let her. I was too confident. Turns out she shouldโ€™ve been the confident one.

I place the foil packets over the coals and step back, taking a look around. The small campsite is exactly how I remember it, hidden within all the greenery, plush brush and old, towering trees. The sunshine filters through the branches, making the stream sparkle, and birds sing on a continuous loop. Itโ€™s as pristine as it always was, aside from the odd camping gear left scattered and forgotten on the ground, like the fire extinguisher lying ten feet or so from the fire pit.

I pick up the narrow, white canister. The label tells me itโ€™s one that sprays water, and the gauge says itโ€™s still got some life left in it.

โ€œHey, Ollie, look.โ€ I hold the canister between my legs and aim the hose outward. When she meets my gaze, I squeeze the handle, a stream of water spraying out in a fine mist as I swivel my hips. โ€œIt looks like Iโ€™m jizโ€”โ€

โ€œYes, Carter, I know what it looks like.โ€

I set the canister down and lean against the trunk of a tree, flicking my brows up. โ€œYou wanna go back in the bushes? I can empty my load in your

โ€”โ€

โ€œFor fuckโ€™s sake, Carter. Iย knowย your dad didnโ€™t teach you this on one of your many fishing expeditions.โ€

โ€œNo, he didnโ€™t.โ€ I chuckle, taking a seat beside her on the blanket as years of memories come flooding back, memories Iโ€™ve spent years wanting to forget. I donโ€™t have a clue why, not when theyโ€™re incredible as these.

I wind an arm around Olivia, and she settles into my side. Sheโ€™s warm beneath the May sun, and she smells like coconut and lime, the sunscreen she made us both wear.

โ€œHe taught me how to set up my rod, how to knot my hooks and bait them. He taught me how to skate, how to puck-handle, how to take a slap shot. He taught me how to turn my shoelaces into bunny ears and tie them, how to make my momโ€™s favorite dinner to get her to stop being mad at me when I messed up, how to work hard and save money. He taught me how to be a good son, a brother, and a friend.โ€

โ€œAnd a partner,โ€ Olivia adds.

โ€œHe taught me how to love. I know how to love you so well because I watched him love my mom so well, love me and my sister so unconditionally. Does that make me a good partner? How much I love you?โ€

โ€œMhmm. But there are so many reasons youโ€™re a good partner, Carter. Youโ€™re fierce and loyal. Youโ€™re patient and kind and the most passionate person I know. You never give up, and youโ€™re so proud of me all the time, and it helps me be proud of myself. Iโ€™m a more confident person than I was six months ago because of the love you show me.โ€

I smile down at her, touching my lips to hers. โ€œI like that.โ€ A heaviness settles on my chest, a weight thatโ€™s been looming for years, waiting for a vulnerability to jump on. Oliviaโ€™s my vulnerability. As strong as I am, loving her makes me weak too. Our love opens up pieces of me I didnโ€™t

know existed, or maybe pieces Iโ€™d tucked away. Because Iโ€™d do anything for her, give her anything, and right now, I want to give her the truth Iโ€™ve been avoiding. โ€œIโ€™m not sure Iโ€™ve been the best son, though. Not to my dad.โ€

โ€œWhat do you mean?โ€

โ€œI havenโ€™t visited him since the funeral, the cemetery where heโ€™s buried.โ€

Olivia runs her fingers through my hair. โ€œI donโ€™t think that makes you a bad son, Carter. Things like that can be challenging. Maybe thatโ€™s not where you feel him. And thatโ€™s okay. Do you want to go back?โ€

โ€œItโ€™s always felt too hard, but maybeโ€ฆmaybe one day, if youโ€™ll come with me. Things always feel easier with you.โ€

Her smile is soft and warm, like her. โ€œHard things are always easier when weโ€™re together.โ€

Sheโ€™s right. And thatโ€™s exactly how I find myself turning right where I should be turning left two hours later.

Thatโ€™s how I find myself gripping the steering wheel as I stare down the long path that winds through the cemetery, the simple thought of walking through it daunting.

Thatโ€™s how I find myself clutching Oliviaโ€™s hand as she walks alongside me, and still as she stands next to me while I stare down at the words carved in marble before us.

Theodore โ€˜Theoโ€™ Beckett

LOVING HUSBAND & DEVOTED FATHER BEST FRIEND

โ€œRemember me as I lived: full of love, laughter, and passionโ€

Thereโ€™s a strange ache in my chest. Itโ€™s tight and a little painful, but itโ€™s not heavy. And when Olivia squeezes my hand, when she turns into my side and presses a kiss to my arm, the pain starts to retreat.

I donโ€™t know how long we stand there in silence, but when Iโ€™m ready to leave, Olivia presses a kiss to my lips.

โ€œJust a second, Carter. Thereโ€™s something I want to do first.โ€

I watch Olivia approach my dadโ€™s grave, and when she kneels in front of it, head bowing, my throat constricts. Her head lifts after a moment, and she lays her hand over his name before she stands and makes her way back

to me. I donโ€™t know what to say, but she doesnโ€™t ask me to talk, so we ride in silence, her hand in mine in the center console.

โ€œCarter,โ€ Olivia says as we drive through downtown. โ€œI hate to do this, but would you mind stopping? I need to use the bathroom and Iโ€™m not sure I can wait.โ€

โ€œSure, baby. Where do you want me to stop?โ€

She points at the building up the street. โ€œJust at your condo.โ€ โ€œWe canโ€™t go there.โ€

โ€œIโ€™ll be quick.โ€

โ€œI sold the condo, Ollie.โ€

Olivia blinks at me. โ€œWhat? When?โ€

โ€œUh, you know the first time I came to see you at work? The Monday after I brought you to the condo? I dropped the keys off to my real estate agent that morning and asked her to take care of it. It was gone by the end of the week.โ€

It was a bonus years ago when I re-signed with Vancouver after my initial contract was up. I had no intention of going anywhere else, but everybody who could afford me wanted me, and Vancouver wanted to make sure I stayed, so they threw everything they could at me. I only lived there for one season before I bought my house, and instead of selling it, I kept it. I wanted that part of my life separate from the rest of it, the most personal parts of me. I wasnโ€™t lying when I said Olivia was the first woman Iโ€™d had in my bed at home, and sheโ€™ll be the only.

โ€œCarterโ€ฆโ€

โ€œIt was never my home, Ollie. Not without you.โ€

My home is wherever Olivia is. When weโ€™re lying on the balcony an hour later, freshly showered and wasting away the rest of the afternoon, the warm breeze tickling our skin, this is where I feel it the most, where I could stay forever, so long as itโ€™s with her.

My fingers dance across Oliviaโ€™s shoulders, kissed pink and sprinkled with tiny freckles from the sun. โ€œYouโ€™re so beautiful, Ollie.โ€

โ€œYou just like my sundresses.โ€ Her words kiss my neck.

โ€œI fuckingย loveย your sundresses.โ€ Winter lasted for-fucking-ever here, a colossal shitstorm Vancouver hasnโ€™t seen in ages and hopefully never sees again, but spring came roaring in like a lion. April was warm and rainy, and Mayโ€™s been every bit an early summer. That means Oliviaโ€™s traded in her sweaters for these adorable sundresses that show off her legs, her shoulders,

and I get to be touching her all the time, feeling how warm her skin is beneath my lips, or my cheek on her shoulder. โ€œIโ€™m thinking we should relocate to San Jose or Tampa, somewhere itโ€™s always warm. Youโ€™ll never have to wear pants again.โ€

โ€œMmmโ€ฆand you know what comes with no pants, Carter?โ€ โ€œWhat?โ€

Olivia crawls on top of me, straddling my hips, her flowery yellow sundress riding up. She takes my hand, running it up her creamy thighs, and dips my fingers. I think I might cry when I meet that pool of heat.

She bends, lips meeting my jaw. โ€œNo panties.โ€

No fucking panties.

She tugs on my shorts, shifting them down, and I hiss when her hand wraps around my cock. He kicks in her tight grasp and I fumble for my phone, snapping a picture at the exact moment she swallows me in her mouth.

I gather her damp curls in my fist. โ€œI fucking love you.โ€

Fuck, you ever seen the most beautiful girl in the world smile at you with her mouth full of your cock?ย Jesus Christ, itโ€™s a sight. I take one more picture before I yank her head back.

โ€œI need you to sit on me, baby. Right fucking now.โ€

Olivia presses herself overtop of me, rocking, letting my cock slide through her sopping slit, and when she lifts, lining the head up, I stop her.

โ€œWait. I just want to sayโ€ฆthank you. Thank you for today, Ollie. Spending the day doing something my dad and I used to do together, going with me to see himโ€ฆit means a lot to me. Thank you.โ€

Her smile is tender and a little bit bashful, and she sits back on my thighs. โ€œI was thinking maybe next year we could do a whole week for your dadโ€™s birthday, the way he always did, with you and your sister and your mom. Do the things you guys did together. And Hank as well. We could do something he and Ireland loved to do. Maybe it would be a nice way to remember them.โ€

I donโ€™t know how I found her, but Iโ€™m pretty sure it was fate, the same way I walked into the same bar Hank was in that night.

โ€œCan I ask you something, Ollie? What did you say? To my dad? When you knelt downโ€ฆโ€

โ€œThank you.โ€ โ€œThank you?โ€

โ€œI thanked him for bringing me another family, trusting me with loving them. I thanked him for raising the man I love, and for bringing him to me.โ€ Her hand glides along my jaw. โ€œI thanked him for you, Carter.โ€

My chest constricts, a lump in my throat forming thatโ€™s impossible to swallow, but I try anyway. When that doesnโ€™t work, I look to the sky, and a single tear drips from my eye. Oliviaโ€™s lips trap it, stopping it in its track, and when she whispers how much she loves me, I bury myself to the hilt in the best thing thatโ€™s ever been mine.

 

โ€œYouโ€™re going to burn my steak if you donโ€™t stop looking at me.โ€

I grin at Olivia, hitting her with a wink. Sheโ€™s lounging on a blanket on the grass, feet in the air as she reads a book, curls piled on top of her head. I donโ€™t know how anybody can be expected to take their eyes off her, but sheโ€™s picky about her steak and I like to please her, so I manage.

Todayโ€™s been perfect, a glimpse at the summer to come, days on end to spend together, and I donโ€™t want it to end. Itโ€™s been a welcome reprieve from the constant need to be on, always thinking about the next play-off game. Breaks are few and far between, but weโ€™re one win away from heading to the Conference Finals, and I managed to surprise Olivia by flying her parents to Winnipeg for the game we played there two nights ago. Itโ€™s been a hectic month, and with the finals looming and Oliviaโ€™s move, June is shaping up to be even more crazy.

โ€œIs that your phone?โ€ Olivia calls, head cranking in the direction of the patio door.

My ears perk, and when I hear my ringtone, I shut the lid on the barbecue and jog to the door. My phone sits on the kitchen countertop, and the number is one I donโ€™t recognize.

โ€œAm I speaking with Carter?โ€ the voice on the other end asks. โ€œThis is Carter.โ€

โ€œHi, Carter. My name is Dr. Murphy. Iโ€™m a doctor at Vancouver General Hospital. Youโ€™re listed as Hank De Vriesโ€™s emergency contact.โ€

The barbecue tongs in my hands clatter to the floor, and I barely register Oliviaโ€™s voice calling out to me.

โ€œThereโ€™s been an accident.โ€

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