Whoever did this will pay.
Slowly.
Painfully.
T
HE NEXT FEW HOURS ARE SHEER, CONCENTRATED AGONY.
The mere act of breathing is an ordeal. My stomach hurts like itās about to digest itself, bruised from the inside out by a thousand wild
creatures who are having way too much fun carving their name in its lining with a rusty knife. There are several momentsāand then a single one, long, protractedāwhen Iām sure, just sure, that this is the end. No living being can sustain this level of torment, and Iām going to die.
Which is just fine. Nothing can be worse than what Iām experiencing. I welcome the blissful release of nothingness and all that good shit, but just when Iām about to tip into the void, something pulls me back.
First thereās someoneāokay, Lowe, yes, Loweāgiving orders. Barking orders. Growling orders. Or perhaps not Lowe, because Iāve never seen him any way but in control. He sounds desperate, which makes me want to crawl out of my corner of pain and reassure him that itāll be okayāmaybe not me, but everything else.
And yet, Iām unable to speak for eons. Many, many times I drift right up to the edge of consciousness, only to sink back into sweaty, suffocating darkness. And when I finally manage to drag my eyes open . . .
āThere she is.ā
Dr. Averill? I try to say, but my tongue is glued to the roof of my mouth.
I know him. The Collateralās official physician. With diplomatic passage into Human territory, where heād give me annual checkups to ensure that I remained healthy enough to . . . be killed if the alliance dissolved, I guess? His duties must have expanded, which is a shame, because he looks as ancient now as he did when I was ten. Except that thereās something weird about him. Is he experimenting with facial hair?
āLittle Misery Lark. Itās been a while.ā
āNot the mustache,ā I slur, delirious, unable to keep my eyelids up.
He clucks his tongue. āIf you have the energy to question my appearance, maybe you donāt need this painkiller,ā he mutters in the Tongue, ornery as always. I would beg my apologies, claw that syringe out of his hands and into my body, but the needle is already pushing into my arm.
The burning quiets. There are voices, from inside the room or several miles away.
āāher organism deals with the poison. Sheāll gradually slip into a healing trance. Sheāll look very still, and youāll be worried that sheās dead. But itās simply the Vampyre way.ā
āHow long?ā Lowe asks.
āSeveral hours. Days, maybe. Donāt look at me like that, young man.ā A few muttered curses. āWhat do I do?ā
āThereās nothing to do. Itās her bodyās job to combat the infection now.ā āBut what do I do? For her?ā
Dr. Averill sighs. āMake her comfortable. At some point after she wakes up, sheāll need to feedāmore than usual, in quantity and in frequency. Make sure that you have blood at her disposal, the fresher the better.ā
A long pause. I picture Lowe running a hand over his jaw. His worried gesture.
āAnd of course, thereās the matter of her father. Iāll have to inform Councilman Lark about what happened. He might see this as an act of aggression, even a war declaration against the Vampyres . . .ā
Dr. Averillās voice fades, and I fall back inside myself.
ā. . . NEED TO REST.ā
āNo.ā
āCome on, Lowe. You need to sleep. Iāll watch over her while youāā
āNo.ā
āāTAKE ANA AWAY.ā
āWe cannot be sure that Ana was the real target,ā Mick protests. āThe intended victim could have been Misery.ā
āBut what if Ana was?ā Juno points out. āWe shouldnāt risk it.ā
āAgreed,ā Cal says. āLetās move Ana to a safe place until we find out who did this.ā
āWe all know it was Emery.ā Mick.
āI know no such thing, and Iām done assuming.ā Lowe is icily, murderously angry. āMy wife was on the brink of death until hours ago. Iām going to move Ana to a safe place. This is not up for discussion.ā
āWhere will you move her?ā Mick asks. āThatās for me to know.ā
COOL LIPS PRESS A SOFT KISS INTO MY FEVERISH PALM.
āMisery, I . . .ā
I COME OUT OF THE HEALING TRANCE ALL AT ONCE, LIKE A SALMON
bursting from a stream.
I sit up in bed, clammy and breathless and utterly disoriented, and wait for the pain to make itself known. I expect it to follow its usual roads: start
from my stomach, irradiate out to my limbs, rake through my nerves like an army of knives. When nothing happens, I look down at my body in bafflement, wondering where itās gone. But there it is: colder than usual, perhaps; paler, definitely; intact, ultimately.
Healed? I pull back the covers to test that theory. The large white T-shirt Iām wearing doesnāt belong to me, but the pretty lace underwear is mineā courtesy of the wedding stylist. I havenāt worn it since the ceremony, and I refuse to wonder how it ended up on me. Instead I stand. Even though Iām wobblier than a newborn calf, my legs are functional. I push through the exhaustion and force myself to walk.
The clock on the wall says one thirty in the morning, and the house is dead silent, but Iām fairly sure that more than a few hours have passed since I first lost consciousness. Did I skip a day? I have no phone to check, so I do the pre-technology thing: head outside to ask someone.
Hopefully not the person who poisoned my peanut butter.
I open the door to a dimly lit hallway and almost stumble on the pile of clothes right outsideāAna giving her dolls another makeover, I bet. I hold on to the wall and weakly step around it, but the pile moves.
It uncurls. Then gets up. Then stretches, very much like a cat would. Then it opens its eyes, which happen to be a very beautiful, very pale, very familiar green.
Because itās not a pile at all. Itās a wolf. Curled outside my room.
Guarding my door.
A huge white wolf.
A fucking gigantic white wolf.
āLowe?ā My voice is unused and rusty. I may have been out more than just one day. āIs that you?ā
The wolf blinks at me, still enjoying his stretch. I blink back, hopefully stumbling on the Morse code for pls pls pls donāt eat me.
āI donāt want to assume, but the eyes look like yours, and . . .ā
He trots to me, and I scurry back in a blast of panic, plastering myself to the wall. Oh, shit. Oh, shit. Heās just so much larger than Cal, so much larger than I thought wolves could be. I squeeze my eyes shut, not wanting
a high-def view of my duodenum getting ripped out of my abdominal cavity and then eaten.
And then something soft and damp pokes me in the hip. I crack one eyelid open, and there it is: a muzzle, pressing against my skin. Pushing gently, but firmly. Like heās herding me. Back inside the room.
āYou want me to . . . ?ā He doesnāt reply, but he radiates satisfaction when I take a few steps back, and when I stop, he nudges me again, even more insistent. āOkay. Iām going.ā
I march back where I came from. The wolf follows at my heels, and once weāre both in the room, angles his body and closes the door with more ease than anyone without opposable thumbs should display.
āLowe?ā I just want to be sure. The eyes seem proof enough, but . . .
God, Iām exhausted. āIt is you, right?ā He pads to me.
āYouāre not Juno? Or Mick. Please, tell me youāre not Ken Doll.ā A soft, rumbly noise rises from the back of his throat.
āI guess I expected your fur would be dark. Because your hair is.ā I let him prod me toward the bed. āYes, Iām going back to sleep. I feel like total shit, but not the bed, please. The closet.ā
He understands, because he closes his very impressive jaws around a pillow and carries it to the closet. And then does the same with a blanket, under my bemused stare.
āGod, youāre just so fluffy. And . . . sorry, but youāre kinda cute. I know you could murder me in less time than it takes to stick a straw in a blood bag. But youāre soft. And your coat is not even sparkly pink. I donāt know what you were embarrassed about, you majestic fluffballāyes, fine, Iām going.ā
He all but drags me to the closet, and doesnāt stop bossing me around until Iām lying down in my favorite spot. I wonder how he managed to find it. Might be a scent thing.
āFYI, your Alpha tendencies are even worse in this form.ā His tongue darts out and licks at my neck.
āEw, gross,ā I giggle. His teeth close around my arm. A joking, playful warning that could shatter my ulna. But wonāt.
āCan I pet you?ā
His head turns to butt under my hand. Yes, please.
āWell, then,ā I half laugh, half yawn, scratching him behind the ears, luxuriating in the beautiful, comforting feeling of his coat. Itās not hard to ask, not when heās in this form, a fierce hunter who loves a cuddle: āDo you want to stay? Sleep with me?ā
Apparently, itās not hard to say yes, either. Lowe doesnāt hesitate before curling right next to me.
And when I inhale deeply, the smell of his heartbeat is all itās always been: familiar, spicy, rich.
I fall asleep twined with him, feeling safer than ever before.