Witness Interview (Continued)
5IM:ย I feel stupid now.
ZARA:ย I donโt suppose thatโs a new feeling for you.
5IM:ย If Iโd known you ran a bank, obviously I wouldnโt have said that. Well, I mean, I shouldnโt have said it anyway. Iโm not really sure what to say now.
ZARA:ย In that case, perhaps I can just leaveแนข
5IM:ย No, hold on. Look, this is all a bit embarrassing. My wife has often told me that I should just keep my mouth shut. Iโll stick to my questions from now on, okayแนข
ZARA:ย Letโs give it a try.
5IM:ย Can you describe the robberแนข Anything at all that you can remember about him, anything you think could be helpful to our investigation.
ZARA:ย You already seem to know the most important thing.
5IM:ย And that isแนข
ZARA:ย You said โhim,โ so you evidently know he was a man. That explains a lot.
5IM:ย I have a feeling Iโm likely to regret asking this, but whyแนข
ZARA:ย You lot canโt even piss without missing the target. So obviously things are going to go wrong if you get hold of a pistol.
5IM:ย Can I interpret that as meaning you donโt remember any details about his appearanceแนข
ZARA:ย If someoneโs wearing a mask and pointing a pistol at you, a psychologist would probably compare the trauma to almost being run down by a truck: youโd be unlikely to remember the number on the license plate.
5IM:ย I have to say, thatโs a very insightful observation.
ZARA:ย Thatโs a relief, because what you think really matters to me.
Can I go nowแนข
5IM:ย Not yet, Iโm afraid. Do you recognize this drawingแนข
ZARA:ย Is that what it isแนข It looks like someoneโs knocked over a urine sample.
5IM:ย Iโll interpret that as a no to the question of whether or not you recognize the picture.
ZARA:ย Very clever of you.
5IM:ย Where in the apartment were you when the bank robber came inแนข
ZARA:ย By the balcony door.
5IM:ย And where were you during the rest of the hostage dramaแนข
ZARA:ย What difference does that makeแนข
5IM:ย Quite a lot of difference.
ZARA:ย I canโt imagine why.
5IM:ย Look, youโre not a suspect. Not yet, anyway.
ZARA:ย Sorryแนข
5IM:ย Well, look. What Iโm trying to get you to understand is that you need to try to understand that my colleague is convinced that one of the hostages helped the bank robber to escape. And it seems odd that you were there at all, to put it bluntly. To start with, you had no reason to want to buy the apartment. And you donโt appear to have been frightened when the bank robber aimed his pistol at you.
ZARA:ย So now you suspect thatย Iย helped the bank robber to escapeแนข
5IM:ย No. No, not at all. Look, youโre not a suspect at all. Well, not yet, anyway. I mean, youโre not a suspect at all! But my colleague thinks
it all seems a bit odd.
ZARA:ย Reallyแนข Do you know what I think your colleague seems likeแนข
5IM:ย Can you tell me what happened in the apartment, pleaseแนข So I can record itแนข Thatโs my job here.
ZARA:ย Sure.
5IM:ย Great. How many prospective buyers were there in the apartmentแนข
ZARA:ย De๏ฌne โprospective buyers.โ
5IM:ย I mean: How many people were there who wanted to buy the apartmentแนข
ZARA:ย Five.
5IM:ย Fiveแนข
ZARA:ย Two couples. One woman.
5IM:ย Plus you and the real estate agent. So seven hostages in totalแนข
ZARA:ย Five plus two is seven, yes. Youโre very smart.
5IM:ย But there were eight hostagesแนขย ZARA:ย You havenโt counted the rabbit.ย 5IM:ย The rabbitแนข
ZARA:ย You heard.
5IM:ย What rabbitแนข
ZARA:ย Do you want me to tell you what happened or notแนข
5IM:ย Sorry.
ZARA:ย Do you seriously think one of the hostages helped the bank robber to escapeแนข
5IM:ย You donโt think soแนข
ZARA:ย No.
5IM:ย Why notแนข
ZARA:ย They were all idiots.
5IM:ย And the bank robberแนข
ZARA:ย What about the bank robberแนข
5IM:ย Do you think he shot himself intentionally or by accidentแนข
ZARA:ย What are you talking aboutแนข
5IM:ย We heard a pistol shot from the apartment, after you were released. When we got inside the apartment the floor was covered in blood.
ZARA:ย Bloodแนข Whereแนข
5IM:ย On the carpet and floor in the living room.
ZARA:ย Oh. Nowhere elseแนข
5IM:ย No.ย ZARA:ย Okay.ย 5IM:ย Sorryแนข
ZARA:ย Excuse meแนข
5IM:ย When you said โokay,โ it sounded as if you were about to say something more.
ZARA:ย De๏ฌnitely not.
5IM:ย Sorry. Well, my colleague is convinced it was there in the living room that he shot himself. That was what I was going to say.
ZARA:ย And you still donโt know who the bank robber isแนข
5IM:ย No.
ZARA:ย Listenโif you donโt explain soon how on earth you suspect I might be involved in this, youโll end up wishing Iย hadย called my lawyer.
5IM:ย No one suspects you of anything! My colleague would just like to know why you were there in the apartment, if you werenโt there to buy itแนข
ZARA:ย My psychologist told me I needed a hobby.
5IM:ย Viewing apartments is your hobbyแนข
ZARA:ย People like you are more interesting than you might imagine.
5IM:ย People like meแนข
ZARA:ย People in your socio-economic bracket. Itโs interesting seeing how you live. How you manage to bear it. I went to a few viewings, then a few more, itโs like heroin. Have you tried heroinแนข You feel disgusted with yourself, but itโs hard to stop.
5IM:ย Youโre telling me youโve become addicted to viewing apartments owned by people who earn far less than youแนข
ZARA:ย Yes. Like when kids catch baby birds in glass jars. The same slightly forbidden attraction.
5IM:ย You mean insectsแนข People do that with insects.
ZARA:ย Sure. If that makes you feel better.
5IM:ย So you were at this apartment viewing because itโs your hobbyแนข
ZARA:ย Is that a real tattoo on your armแนข
5IM:ย Yes.
ZARA:ย Is it supposed to be an anchorแนข
5IM:ย Yes.
ZARA:ย Did you lose a bet or somethingแนข
5IM:ย What do you mean by thatแนข
ZARA:ย Was someone threatening your familyแนข Or did you do it voluntarilyแนข
5IM:ย Voluntarily.
ZARA:ย Why do people like you hate money so muchแนข
5IM:ย Iโm not even going to comment on that. Iโd just like you to tell me, so that weโve got it on tape, why the other witnesses say you didnโt seem at all afraid when you saw the bank robberโs pistol. Did you think it wasnโt realแนข
ZARA:ย I understood perfectly well that it was real. Thatโs why I wasnโt frightened. I was surprised.
5IM:ย Thatโs an unusual reaction to a pistol.
ZARA:ย For you, maybe. But Iโd been contemplating killing myself for quite a long time, so when I saw the pistol I was surprised.
5IM:ย I donโt know what to say to that. Sorry. Youโd been contemplating killing yourselfแนข
ZARA:ย Yes. So I was surprised when I realized that I didnโt want to die. It came as a bit of a shock.
5IM:ย Did you start seeing your psychologist because of those suicidal thoughtsแนข
ZARA:ย No. I needed the psychologist because I was having trouble sleeping. Because I used to lie awake thinking that I could have killed myself if only I had enough sleeping pills.
5IM:ย And it was your psychologist who suggested that you needed a hobbyแนข
ZARA:ย Yes. That was after I told her about my cancer.
5IM:ย Oh. Iโm very sorry to hear that. How sad.
ZARA:ย Okay, lookโฆ
