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Chapter no 32

Adventures of Huckleberry Finn

When I got there it was all still and Sunday-like, and hot and sunshiny; the hands was gone to the fields; and there was them kind of faint dronings of bugs and flies in the air that makes it seem so lonesome and like everybodyโ€™s dead and gone; and if a breeze fans along and quivers the leaves it makes you feel mournful, because you feel like itโ€™s spirits whisperingโ€”spirits thatโ€™s been dead ever so many yearsโ€”and you always think theyโ€™re talking aboutย you. As a general thing it makes a body wishย heย was dead, too, and done with it all.

Phelpsโ€™ was one of these little one-horse cotton plantations, and they all look alike. A rail fence round a two-acre yard; a stile made out of logs sawed off and up-ended in steps, like barrels of a different length, to climb over the fence with, and for the women to stand on when they are going to jump on to a horse; some sickly grass-patches in the big yard, but mostly it was bare and smooth, like an old hat with the nap rubbed off; big double log-house for the white folksโ€”hewed logs, with the chinks stopped up with mud or mortar, and these mud-stripes been whitewashed some time or another; round-log kitchen, with a big broad, open but roofed passage joining it to the house; log smoke-house back of the kitchen; three little log nigger-cabins in a row tโ€™other side the smoke-house; one little hut all by itself away down against the back fence, and some outbuildings down a piece the other side; ash-hopper and big kettle to bile soap in by the little hut; bench by the kitchen door, with bucket of water and a gourd; hound asleep there in the sun; more hounds asleep round about; about three shade trees away off in a corner; some currant bushes and gooseberry bushes in one place by the fence; outside of the fence a garden and a watermelon patch; then the cotton fields begins, and after the fields the woods.

I went around and clumb over the back stile by the ash-hopper, and started for the kitchen. When I got a little ways I heard the dim hum of a spinning-wheel wailing along up and sinking along down again; and then I knowed for certain I wished I was deadโ€”for thatย isย the lonesomest sound in the whole world.

I went right along, not fixing up any particular plan, but just trusting to Providence to put the right words in my mouth when the time come; for Iโ€™d noticed that Providence always did put the right words in my mouth if I left it alone.

When I got half-way, first one hound and then another got up and went for me, and of course I stopped and faced them, and kept still. And such another powwow as they made! In a quarter of a minute I was a kind of a hub of a wheel, as you may sayโ€”spokes made out of dogsโ€”circle of fifteen of them packed together around me, with their necks and noses stretched up towards me, a-barking and howling; and more a-coming; you could see them sailing over fences and around corners from everywheres.

A nigger woman come tearing out of the kitchen with a rolling-pin in her hand, singing out, โ€œBegoneย youย Tige! you Spot! begone sah!โ€ and she fetched first one and then another of them a clip and sent them howling, and then the rest followed; and the next second half of them come back, wagging their tails around me, and making friends with me. There ainโ€™t no harm in a hound, nohow.

And behind the woman comes a little nigger girl and two little nigger boys without anything on but tow-linen shirts, and they hung on to their motherโ€™s gown, and peeped out from behind her at me, bashful, the way they always do. And here comes the white woman running from the house, about forty-five or fifty year old, bareheaded, and her spinning-stick in her hand; and behind her comes her little white children, acting the same way the little niggers was doing. She was smiling all over so she could hardly standโ€”and says:

โ€œItโ€™sย you, at last!โ€”ainโ€™tย it?โ€

I out with a โ€œYesโ€™mโ€ before I thought.

She grabbed me and hugged me tight; and then gripped me by both hands and shook and shook; and the tears come in her eyes, and run down over; and she couldnโ€™t seem to hug and shake enough, and kept saying, โ€œYou donโ€™t look as much like your mother as I reckoned you would; but law sakes, I donโ€™t care for that, Iโ€™mย soย glad to see you! Dear, dear, it does seem like I could eat you up! Children, itโ€™s your cousin Tom!โ€”tell him howdy.โ€

But they ducked their heads, and put their fingers in their mouths, and hid behind her. So she run on:

โ€œLize, hurry up and get him a hot breakfast right awayโ€”or did you get your breakfast on the boat?โ€

I said I had got it on the boat. So then she started for the house, leading me by the hand, and the children tagging after. When we got there she set me down in a split-bottomed chair, and set herself down on a little low stool in front of me, holding both of my hands, and says:

โ€œNow I can have aย goodย look at you; and, laws-a-me, Iโ€™ve been hungry for it a many and a many a time, all these long years, and itโ€™s come at last! We been expecting you a couple of days and more. What kepโ€™ you?โ€”boat get aground?โ€

โ€œYesโ€™mโ€”sheโ€”โ€

โ€œDonโ€™t say yesโ€™mโ€”say Aunt Sally. Whereโ€™d she get aground?โ€

I didnโ€™t rightly know what to say, because I didnโ€™t know whether the boat would be coming up the river or down. But I go a good deal on instinct; and my instinct said she would be coming upโ€”from down towards Orleans. That didnโ€™t help me much, though; for I didnโ€™t know the names of bars down that way. I see Iโ€™d got to invent a bar, or forget the name of the one we got aground onโ€”orโ€”Now I struck an idea, and fetched it out:

โ€œIt warnโ€™t the groundingโ€”that didnโ€™t keep us back but a little. We blowed out a cylinder-head.โ€

โ€œGood gracious! anybody hurt?โ€

โ€œNoโ€™m. Killed a nigger.โ€

โ€œWell, itโ€™s lucky; because sometimes people do get hurt. Two years ago last Christmas your uncle Silas was coming up from Newrleans on the oldย Lally Rook, and she blowed out a cylinder-head and crippled a man. And I think he died afterwards. He was a Baptist. Your uncle Silas knowed a family in Baton Rouge that knowed his people very well. Yes, I remember now, heย didย die. Mortification set in, and they had to amputate him. But it didnโ€™t save him. Yes, it was mortificationโ€”that was it. He turned blue all over, and died in the hope of a glorious resurrection. They say he was a sight to look at. Your uncleโ€™s been up to the town every day to fetch you. And heโ€™s gone again, not moreโ€™n an hour ago; heโ€™ll be back any minute now. You must a met him on the road, didnโ€™t you?โ€”oldish man, with aโ€”โ€

โ€œNo, I didnโ€™t see nobody, Aunt Sally. The boat landed just at daylight, and I left my baggage on the wharf-boat and went looking around the town and out a piece in the country, to put in the time and not get here too soon; and so I come down the back way.โ€

โ€œWhoโ€™d you give the baggage to?โ€

โ€œNobody.โ€

โ€œWhy, child, itโ€™ll be stole!โ€

โ€œNot whereย Iย hid it I reckon it wonโ€™t,โ€ I says.

โ€œHowโ€™d you get your breakfast so early on the boat?โ€

It was kinder thin ice, but I says:

โ€œThe captain see me standing around, and told me I better have something to eat before I went ashore; so he took me in the texas to the officersโ€™ lunch, and give me all I wanted.โ€

I was getting so uneasy I couldnโ€™t listen good. I had my mind on the children all the time; I wanted to get them out to one side and pump them a little, and find out who I was. But I couldnโ€™t get no show, Mrs. Phelps kept it up and run on so. Pretty soon she made the cold chills streak all down my back, because she says:

โ€œBut here weโ€™re a-running on this way, and you hainโ€™t told me a word about Sis, nor any of them. Now Iโ€™ll rest my works a little, and you start up yourn; just tell meย everythingโ€”tell me all about โ€™m all every one of โ€™m; and how they are, and what theyโ€™re doing, and what they told you to tell me; and every last thing you can think of.โ€

Well, I see I was up a stumpโ€”and up it good. Providence had stood by me this fur all right, but I was hard and tight aground now. I see it warnโ€™t a bit of use to try to go aheadโ€”Iโ€™dย gotย to throw up my hand. So I says to myself, hereโ€™s another place where I got to resk the truth. I opened my mouth to begin; but she grabbed me and hustled me in behind the bed, and says:

โ€œHere he comes! Stick your head down lowerโ€”there, thatโ€™ll do; you canโ€™t be seen now. Donโ€™t you let on youโ€™re here. Iโ€™ll play a joke on him. Children, donโ€™t you say a word.โ€

I see I was in a fix now. But it warnโ€™t no use to worry; there warnโ€™t nothing to do but just hold still, and try and be ready to stand from under when the lightning struck.

I had just one little glimpse of the old gentleman when he come in; then the bed hid him. Mrs. Phelps she jumps for him, and says:

โ€œHas he come?โ€

โ€œNo,โ€ says her husband.

โ€œGood-nessย gracious!โ€ she says, โ€œwhat in the warld can have become of him?โ€

โ€œI canโ€™t imagine,โ€ says the old gentleman; โ€œand I must say it makes me dreadful uneasy.โ€

โ€œUneasy!โ€ she says; โ€œIโ€™m ready to go distracted! Heย mustย a come; and youโ€™ve missed him along the road. Iย knowย itโ€™s soโ€”something tells me so.โ€

โ€œWhy, Sally, Iย couldnโ€™tย miss him along the roadโ€”youย know that.โ€

โ€œBut oh, dear, dear, whatย willย Sis say! He must a come! You must a missed him. Heโ€”โ€

โ€œOh, donโ€™t distress me any moreโ€™n Iโ€™m already distressed. I donโ€™t know what in the world to make of it. Iโ€™m at my witโ€™s end, and I donโ€™t mind acknowledging โ€™t Iโ€™m right down scared. But thereโ€™s no hope that heโ€™s come; for heย couldnโ€™tย come and me miss him. Sally, itโ€™s terribleโ€”just terribleโ€”somethingโ€™s happened to the boat, sure!โ€

โ€œWhy, Silas! Look yonder!โ€”up the road!โ€”ainโ€™t that somebody coming?โ€

He sprung to the window at the head of the bed, and that give Mrs. Phelps the chance she wanted. She stooped down quick at the foot of the bed and give me a pull, and out I come; and when he turned back from the window there she stood, a-beaming and a-smiling like a house afire, and I standing pretty meek and sweaty alongside. The old gentleman stared, and says:

โ€œWhy, whoโ€™s that?โ€

โ€œWho do you reckon โ€™t is?โ€

โ€œI hainโ€™t no idea. Whoย isย it?โ€

โ€œItโ€™sย Tom Sawyer!โ€

By jings, I most slumped through the floor! But there warnโ€™t no time to swap knives; the old man grabbed me by the hand and shook, and kept on shaking; and all the time how the woman did dance around and laugh and cry; and then how they both did fire off questions about Sid, and Mary, and the rest of the tribe.

But if they was joyful, it warnโ€™t nothing to what I was; for it was like being born again, I was so glad to find out who I was. Well, they froze to me for two hours; and at last, when my chin was so tired it couldnโ€™t hardly go any more, I had told them more about my familyโ€”I mean the Sawyer familyโ€”than ever happened to any six Sawyer families. And I explained all about how we blowed out a cylinder-head at the mouth of White River, and it took us three days to fix it. Which was all right, and worked first-rate; becauseย theyย didnโ€™t know but what it would take three days to fix it. If Iโ€™d a called it a bolthead it would a done just as well.

Now I was feeling pretty comfortable all down one side, and pretty uncomfortable all up the other. Being Tom Sawyer was easy and comfortable, and it stayed easy and comfortable till by-and-by I hear a steamboat coughing along down the river. Then I says to myself, sโ€™pose Tom Sawyer comes down on that boat? And sโ€™pose he steps in here any minute, and sings out my name before I can throw him a wink to keep quiet? Well, I couldnโ€™tย haveย it that way; it wouldnโ€™t do at all. I must go up the road and waylay him. So I told the folks I reckoned I would go up to the town and fetch down my baggage. The old gentleman was for going along with me, but I said no, I could drive the horse myself, and I druther he wouldnโ€™t take no trouble about me.

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