Kell woke up in Lilaโs bed for the second time that night.
Though at least this time, he discovered, there were no ropes. His hands rested at his sides, bound by nothing but the rough blanket that had been cast over him. It took him a moment to remember that it was Lilaโs room, Lilaโs bed, to piece together the memory of Holland and the alley and the blood, and afterward, Lilaโs grip and her voice, as steady as the rain. The rain had stopped falling now, and low morning light was creeping into the sky, and for a moment all Kell wanted was to be home. Not in the shoddy room in the Ruby Fields, but at the palace. He closed his eyes and could almost hear Rhy pounding on his door, telling him to get dressed because the carriages were waiting, and so were the people.
โGet ready or be left behind,โ Rhy would say, bursting into the room. โThen leave me,โ Kell would groan.
โNot a chance,โ Rhy would answer, wearing his best princeโs grin. โNot today.โ
A cart clattered past outside, and Kell blinked, Rhy fading back into nothing.
Were they worried about him yet, the royal family? Did they have any idea what was happening? How could they? Even Kell did not know. He knew only that he had the stone, and that he needed to be rid of it.
He tried to sit up, but his body cried out, and he had to bite his tongue to keep from voicing it. His skin, his muscle, his very bones โฆ everything ached in a steady, horrible way, as if he were nothing but a bruise. Even the beat of his heart in his chest and the pulse of his blood through his veins felt sore, strained. He felt like death. It was as close as he had ever come, and closer than he ever wished to be. When the painโor at least the novelty of itโ lessened, he forced himself upright, bracing a hand against the headboard.
He fought to focus his vision, and when he managed, he found himself looking squarely into Lilaโs eyes. She was sitting in that same chair at the foot of the bed, her pistol in her lap.
โWhy did you do it?โ she asked, the question primed on her tongue, as if sheโd been waiting.
Kell squinted. โDo what?โ
โCome back,โ she said, the words low. โWhy did you come back?โ Two words hung in the air, unsaid but understood.ย For me.
Kell fought to drag his thoughts together, but even they were as stiff and sore as the rest of him. โI donโt know.โ
Lila seemed unimpressed by the answer, but she only sighed and returned her weapon to the holster at her waist. โHow are you feeling?โ
Like hell, thought Kell. But then he looked down at himself and realized that, despite his aching body, the wound at his arm, where the nail had driven through, as well as the one across his stomach from the cutthroatโs stolen sword, were nearly healed. โHow long was I asleep?โ
โA few hours,โ said Lila.
Kell ran a hand gingerly over his ribs. That didnโt make sense. Cuts this deep took days to mend, not hours. Not unless he had aโ
โI used this,โ said Lila, tossing a circular tin his way. Kell plucked it out of the air, wincing a little as he did. The container was unmarked, but he recognized it at once. The small metal tin contained a healing salve. Not just any healing salve, but one of his own, the royal emblem of the chalice and rising sun embossed on its lid. Heโd misplaced it weeks ago.
โWhere did you get this?โ he asked.
โIn a pocket in your coat,โ said Lila, stretching. โBy the way, did youย knowย that your coat is more than one coat? Iโm pretty sure I went through five or six to find that.โ
Kell stared at her, slack-jawed. โWhat?โ she asked.
โHow did you know what it was for?โ Lila shrugged. โI didnโt.โ
โWhat if it had beenย poison?โ he snapped.
โThereโs really no winning with you,โ she snapped back. โIt smelled fine. It seemed fine.โ Kell groaned. โAnd obviously I tested it on myself first.โ
โYou didย what?โ
Lila crossed her arms. โIโm not repeating myself just so you can gape and glare.โ Kell shook his head, cursing under his breath as she nodded at a pile of clothes at the foot of the bed. โBarron brought those for you.โ
Kell frowned (saints, even his brow hurt when it furrowed). He and Barron had aย businessย agreement. He was pretty sure it didnโt cover shelter and personal necessities. He would owe him for the troubleโand itย wasย trouble. Both of them knew it.
Kell could feel Lilaโs eyes hanging on him as he reached for the clean tunic and shrugged it gingerly over his shoulders. โWhat is it?โ he asked.
โYou said no one would follow you.โ
โI said no oneย could,โ corrected Kell. โBecause no one can, except for Holland.โ Kell looked at his hands and frowned. โI just never thoughtโโ
โOne is not the same thing as none, Kell,โ said Lila. And then she let out a breath and ran a hand through her cropped dark hair. โBut I suppose you didnโt exactly have all your wits about you.โ Kell looked up in surprise. Was she actually excusing him? โAnd I did hit you with a book.โ
โWhat?โ
โNothing,โ said Lila, waving her hand. โSo this Holland. Heโs like you?โ
Kell swallowed, remembering Hollandโs words in the alleyโWe may share an ability, you and I, but that does not make us equalsโand the dark, almost disdainful look that crossed his face when he said it. He thought of the brand burned into the otherย Antariโs skin, and the patchwork of scars on his arms, and the White kingโs smug smile as Holland pressed the knife into his skin. No, Holland was nothing like Kell, and Kell was nothing like Holland.
โHe can also move between worlds,โ explained Kell. โIn that way, we are alike.โ
โAnd the eye?โ questioned Lila.
โA mark of our magic,โ said Kell. โAntari.ย That is what we are called.
Blood magicians.โ
Lila chewed her lip. โAre there any others I should know about?โ she asked, and Kell thought he saw a sliver of somethingโfear?โcross her features, buried almost instantly behind the stubborn set of her jaw.
Kell shook his head slowly. โNo,โ he said, โWe are the only two.โ
He expected her to look relieved, but her expression only grew graver. โIs that why he didnโt kill you?โ
โWhat do you mean?โ
Lila sat forward in her chair. โWell, if heโd wanted to kill you, he could have. Why bleed you dry? For the fun of it? He didnโt seem to be enjoying himself.โ
She was right. Holland could have slit his throat. But he hadnโt.
Itโs really quite hard to kill Antari.ย Hollandโs words echoed in Kellโs head.
But I canโt haveโ
Canโt haveย what?ย wondered Kell. Ending anย Antariโs life might be hard, but it wasnโt impossible. Had Holland been fighting against his orders, or following them?
โKell?โ pressed Lila.
โHolland never enjoys himself,โ he said under his breath. And then he looked up sharply. โWhere is the stone now?โ
Lila gave him a long weighing look and then said, โI have it.โ
โThen give it back,โ demanded Kell, surprising himself with his own urgency. He told himself it would be safest on his person, but in truth, he wanted toย holdย it, couldnโt shake the sense that if he did, his aching muscles would be soothed and his weak blood strengthened.
She rolled her eyes. โNot this again.โ โLila, listen to me. Youโve no idea whatโโ
โActually,โ she cut in, getting to her feet, โIโm starting to get a decent idea of what it can do. If you want it back, tell me the rest.โ
โYou wouldnโt understand,โ said Kell automatically. โTry me,โ she challenged.
Kell squinted at her, this strange girl. Lila Bard did seem to have a way of figuring things out. She was still alive. That said something.ย Andย sheโd come back for him. He didnโt know whyโcutthroats and thieves werenโt usually known for their moral compassesโbut he did know that without her, he would be in a far worse state.
โVery well,โ said Kell, swinging his legs off the bed. โThe stone is from a place known as Black London.โ
โYou mentioned other Londons,โ she said, as if the concept were curious, but not entirely impossible. She didnโt faze easily. โHow many are there?โ
Kell ran a hand through his auburn hair. It stuck up at odd angles from rain and sleep. โThere are four worlds,โ he said. โThink of them as different houses built on the same foundation. They have little in common, save for their geography, and the fact that each has a version of this city straddling this river on this island country, and in each, that city is called London.โ
โThat must be confusing.โ
โIt isnโt, really, when you live in only one of them and never need think of the others. But as someone who moves between, I use color to keep them straight. Grey London, which is yours. Red London, which is mine. White London, which is Hollandโs. And Black London, which is no oneโs.โ
โAnd whyโs that?โ
โBecause it fell,โ said Kell, rubbing the back of his neck where the pendant cords had snapped. โLost to darkness. The first thing about magic that you have to understand, Lila, is that it is not inanimate. It is alive. Alive in a different way than you or I, but still very much alive.โ
โIs that why it got angry?โ she asked. โWhen I tried to get rid of it?โ Kell frowned. Heโd never seen magicย thatย alive.
โNearly three centuries ago,โ he said slowly, working out the math (it seemed further away, the effect of being so long referred to as simply โthe pastโ), โthe four worlds were twined together; magic and those who wielded it able to move between them with relative ease through any one of the many sources.โ
โSources?โ
โPools of immense natural power,โ explained Kell. โSome small, discreet
โa copse of trees in the Far East, a ravine on the Continentโothers vast, like your Thames.โ
โThe Thames?โ said Lila with a derisive snort. โA source of magic?โ โPerhaps the greatest source in the world,โ said Kell. โNot that youโd know
it here, but if you could see it as it is inย myย London โฆโ Kell trailed off. โAs I was saying, the doors between the worlds were open, and the four cities of London intermingled. But even with constant transference, they were not entirely equal in their power. If true magic were a fire, then Black London sat closest to the heat.โ By this logic, White London stood second in strength, and Kell knew it must have, though he could not imagine it now. โIt was believed that the power there not only ran strong in the blood, but pulsed like a second soul through everything. And at some point, it grew too strong and overthrew its host.
โThe world sits in balance,โ said Kell, โhumanity in one hand, magic in the other. The two exist in every living thing, and in a perfect world, they maintain a kind of harmony, neither exceeding the other. But most worlds are not perfect. In Grey Londonโyour Londonโhumanity grew strong and magic weak. But in Black London, it was the other way around. The people there not only held magic in their bodies, they let magic into their minds, and it took them as its own, burning up their lives to fuel its power. They became vessels, conduits, for its will, and through them, it twisted whim into reality, blurring the lines, breaking them down, creating and destroying and corrupting everything.โ
Lila said nothing, only listened and paced.
โIt spread like a plague,โ continued Kell, โand the other three remaining worlds retreated into themselves and locked their doors to prevent the spread of sickness.โ He did not say that it had beenย Redย Londonโs retreat, its sealing off of itself, that forced the other cities to follow, and left White London pinned between their closed doors and Black Londonโs seething magic. He did not say that the world caught between was forced to fight the darkness back alone. โWith the sources restricted, and the doors locked, the remaining three cities were isolated and began to diverge, each becoming as they are now. But what became of Black London and the rest of its world, we can only
guess. Magic requires a living hostโit can thrive only where life does, tooโ so most assume that the plague burned through its hosts and eventually ran out of kindling, leaving only charred remains. None know for sure. Over time, Black London became a ghost story. A fairy tale. Told so many times that some donโt even think it real.โ
โBut the stone โฆ ?โ said Lila, still pacing.
โThe stone shouldnโt exist,โ said Kell. โOnce the doors were sealed, every relic from Black London was tracked down and destroyed as a precaution.โ
โObviously notย everyย relic,โ observed Lila.
Kell shook his head. โWhite London supposedly undertook the task with even more fervor than we did. You must understand, they feared the doors would not hold, feared the magic would break through and consume them. In their cleanse, they did not stop at objects and artifacts. They slit the throats of everyone they even suspected of possessingโof having come in contact with
โBlack Londonโs corrupted magic.โ Kell brought his fingers to his blackened eye. โIt is said that some mistookย Antariโs marks for such corruption and dragged them from their houses in the night. An entire generation slaughtered before they realized that, without the doors, such magicians would be their only way of reaching out.โ Kellโs hand fell away. โBut no, obviously notย everyย relic was destroyed.โ He wondered if that was how it had been broken, if theyโd tried, and failed and buried it, wondered if someone new had dug it up. โThe stone shouldnโt exist and it canโt be allowed to exist. Itโsโโ
Lila stopped pacing. โEvil?โ
Kell shook his head. โNo,โ he said. โIt isย Vitari. In a way, I suppose it is pure. But it is pure potential, pure power, pureย magic.โ
โAnd no humanity,โ said Lila. โNo harmony.โ
Kell nodded. โPurity without balance is its own corruption. The damage this talisman could manage in the wrong hands โฆโย Inย anyoneโsย hands, he thought. โThe stoneโs magic is the magic of a ruined world. It cannot stay here.โ
โWell,โ said Lila, โwhat do you intend to do?โ
Kell closed his eyes. He didnโt know who had come across the stone, or how, but he understood their fear. The memory of it in Hollandโs handsโand the thought of it in Athosโs or Astridโsโturned his stomach. His own skin sang for the talisman, thirsted for it, and that scared him more than anything. Black London fell because of magic like this. What horror would it bring to the Londons that remained? To the starving White, or the ripened Red, or the defenseless Grey?
No, the stone had to be destroyed.
But how? It wasnโt like other relics. It wasnโt a thing to be tossed in a fire or crushed beneath an ax. It looked as though someone had tried, but the broken edge did not seem to diminish its function, which meant that even if he did succeed in shattering it, it might only make more pieces, rendering every shard its own weapon. It was no mere token; the stone had a lifeโand a willโof its own, and had shown so more than once. Only strong magic would be able to unmake such a thing, but as the talisman was magic itself, he doubted that magic could ever be made to destroy it.
Kellโs head ached with the realization that it could not be ruinedโit had to be disposed of. Sent away, somewhere it could do no damage. And there was only one place it would be safe, and everyone safe from it.
Kell knew what he had to do. Some part of him had known since the moment the stone had passed into his hands.
โIt belongs in Black London,โ he said. โI have to take it back.โ
Lila cocked her head. โBut how can you? You donโt know whatโs left of it, and even if you did, you said the world was sealed off.โ
โI donโt know whatโs left of it, no, butย Antariย magic was originally used to make the doors between the worlds. Andย Antariย magic would have been used to seal them shut. And so it stands to reason thatย Antariย magic could open them again. Or at least create a crack.โ
โThen why havenโt you?โ challenged Lila, a glint in her eye. โWhy hasnโt anyone? I know youโre a rare breed, but you cannot tell me that in the centuries since you locked yourselves out, noย Antariย has been curious enough to try and get back in.โ
Kell considered her defiant smile, and was grateful, for humanityโs sake, that she lacked the magic to try. As for Kell, of course heโd been curious. Growing up, a small part of him never believed Black London wasย real, or that it had ever beenโthe doors had been sealed for so long. What child didnโt wish to know if his bedtime stories were the stuff of fiction or of truth? But even if heโdย wantedย to break the sealโand he didnโt, not enough to risk the darkness on the other sideโheโd never had a way.
โMaybe some were curious enough,โ said Kell. โBut anย Antariย needsย twoย things to make a door: the first is blood, the second is a token from the place they want to go. And as I told you, the tokens were all destroyed.โ
Lilaโs eyes widened. โBut the stone is a token.โ โThe stone is a token,โ echoed Kell.
Lila gestured to the wall where Kell had first come in. โSo you open a door to Black London, and what? Throw the stone in? What on earth have you been waiting for?โ
Kell shook his head. โI canโt make a door from here to there.โ
Lila let out an exasperated noise. โBut you just saidโโ
โThe other Londons sit between,โ he explained. A small book rested on the table by the bed. He brushed his thumb over the pages. โThe worlds are like pieces of paper,โ he said, โstacked one on top of the other.โ Thatโs how heโd always thought of it. โYou have to move in order.โ He pinched a few pages between his fingers. โGrey London,โ he said, letting one fall back to the stack. โRed London.โ He let go of a second. โWhite London.โ The third page fluttered as it fell. โAnd Black.โ He let the rest of the pages fall back to the book.
โSo youโll have to goย through,โ said Lila.
It sounded so simple when she put it like that. But it wouldnโt be. No doubt the crown was searching for him in Red London, and saints only knew who else (had Holland compelled others there? Were they searching, too?), and without his pendants, heโd have to hunt down a new trinket to get from there to White London. And once he made it that farโifย he made it that farโand assuming the Danes werenโt on him in an instant,ย andย assuming he was able to overcome the seal and open a door to Black London, the stone couldnโt simply be thrown in. Doors didnโt work that way. Kell would have to go with it. He tried not to think about that.
โSo,โ said Lila, eyes glittering. โWhen do we go?โ Kell looked up. โWeย donโt.โ
Lila was leaning back against the wall, just beside the place heโd cuffed her to the woodโthe board was ripped and ruined where sheโd hacked herself freeโas if reminding him, both of his actions, and of hers.
โI want to come,โ she insisted. โI wonโt tell you where the stone is. Not until you agree to let me.โ
Kellโs hands curled into fist. โThose binds you summoned up for Holland wonโt hold.ย Antariย magic is strong enough to dispel them, and once he wakes, it wonโt take him long to realize that and free himself and start hunting us down again. Which means I donโt have time for games.โ
โItโs not a game,โ she said simply. โThen what is it?โ
โA chance.โ She pushed off the wall. โA way out.โ Her calm shifted, and for a moment Kell glimpsed the things beneath. The want, the fear, the desperation.
โYou want out,โ he said, โbut you have no idea what youโre gettingย into.โ โI donโt care,โ she said. โI want to come.โ
โYou canโt,โ he said, pushing to his feet. A shallow wave of dizziness hit him, and he braced himself against the bed, waiting for it to pass.
She gave a mocking laugh. โYouโre in no shape to go alone.โ
โYouย canโtย come, Lila,โ he said again. โOnlyย Antariย can move between the worlds.โ
โThat rock of mineโโ โItโs not yours.โ
โIt is right now. And you said yourself, itโs pure magic. Itย makesย magic. It will let me through.โ She said it as if she were certain.
โWhat if it wonโt?โ he challenged. โWhat if it isnโt all-powerful? What if itโs only a trinket to conjure up small spells?โ But she didnโt seem to believe him. He wasnโt sure he believed himself. He had held the stone. He had felt its power, and it felt limitless. But he did not wish for Lila to test it. โYou cannot know for sure.โ
โThatโs my risk to take, not yours.โ Kell stared at her. โWhy?โ he asked. Lila shrugged. โIโm a wanted man.โ โYouโre not a man.โ
Lila flashed a hollow smile. โThe authorities donโt know that yet. Probably why Iโm still wanted instead of hanged.โ
Kell refused to let it go. โWhy do you really want to do this?โ โBecause Iโm a fool.โ
โLilaโโ
โBecause I canโt stay here,โ she snapped, the smile gone from her face. โBecause I want to see the world, even if itโs not mine. And because I will save your life.โ
Madness, thought Kell. Absolute madness. She wouldnโt make it through the door. And even if the stone worked, even if she somehow did, what then? Transference was treason, and Kell was fairly certain that law extended to people, particularly fugitives. Smuggling a music box was one thing, but smuggling a thief was quite another.ย And smuggling a relic of Black London?ย chided a voice in Kellโs head. He rubbed his eyes. He could feel hers fixed on him. Treason aside, the fact remained that she was a Grey-worlder; she didnโt belong in his London. It was too dangerous. It was mad, and heโd be mad to let her try โฆ but Lila was right about one thing. Kell did not feel strong enough to do this alone. And worse, he did not want to. He was afraidโmore afraid than he wanted to admitโabout the task ahead of him, and the fate that waited at its end. And someone would need to tell the Red throneโtell his mother and father and Rhyโwhat had happened. He could not bring this danger to their doorstep, but he could leave Lila there to tell them of it.
โYou donโt know anything about these worlds,โ he said, but the fight was
bleeding out of his voice.
โSure I do,โ countered Lila cheerfully. โThereโs Dull London, Kell London, Creepy London, and Dead London,โ she recited, ticking them off on her fingers. โSee? Iโm a fast learner.โ
Youโre also human, thought Kell. A strange, stubborn, cutthroat human, but human all the same. Light, thin and watered down by rain, was beginning to creep into the sky. He couldnโt afford to stand here, waiting her out.
โGive me the stone,โ he said, โand Iโll let you come.โ
Lila bit back a sharp laugh. โI think Iโll hold on to it until weโre through.โ โAnd if you donโt survive?โ challenged Kell.
โThen you can raid my corpse,โ she said drily. โI doubt Iโll care.โ
Kell stared at her, at a loss. Was her bravado a front, or did she truly have so little to lose? But she had a life, and a life was a thing that could always be lost. How could she fear nothing, even death?
Are you afraid of dying?ย Holland had asked him in the alley. And Kell was. Had always been, ever since he could remember. He fearedย not living, feared ceasing to exist. Lilaโs world may believe in Heaven and Hell, but his believed in dust. He was taught early that magic reclaimed magic, and earth reclaimed earth, the two dividing when the body died, the person they had combined to be simply forfeit, lost. Nothing lasted. Nothing remained.
Growing up, he had nightmares in which he suddenly broke apart, one minute running through the courtyard or standing on the palace steps, the next scattered into air and ash. Heโd wake sweat-soaked and gasping, Rhy shaking his shoulder.
โArenโt you afraid of dying?โ he asked Lila now.
She looked at him as if it were a strange question. And then she shook her head. โDeath comes for everyone,โ she said simply. โIโm not afraid of dying. But I am afraid of dyingย here.โ She swept her hand over the room, the tavern, the city. โIโd rather die on an adventure than live standing still.โ
Kell considered her for a long moment. And then he said, โVery well.โ Lilaโs brow crinkled distrustfully. โWhat do you mean, โvery wellโ?โ โYou can come,โ clarified Kell.
Lila broke into a grin. It lit up her face in a whole new way, made her look young. Her eyes went to the window. โThe sun is almost up,โ she said. โAnd Hollandโs likely looking for us by now. Are you well enough to go?โ she asked.
Itโs really quite hard to kill Antari.
Kell nodded as Lila pulled the cloak around her shoulders and holstered her weapons, moving with brisk, efficient motions, as if afraid that if she took too long, he would revoke the offer. He only stood there, marveling.
โDonโt you want to say good-bye?โ he asked, gesturing at the floorboards and somewhere beneath them, Barron.
Lila hesitated, considering her boots and the world below them. โNo,โ she said softly, her voice uncertain for the first time since theyโd met.
He didnโt know how Lilaโs and Barronโs threads were tangled, but he let the issue lie. He did not blame her. After all, he had no plans to detour to the palace, to see his brother one last time. He told himself that it was too dangerous, or that Rhy would not let him go, but it was as much the truth that Kell could not bring himself to say good-bye.
Kellโs coat was hanging on the chair, and he crossed to it and turned it inside out from left to right, exchanging the worn black for ruby red.
Interest flickered like a light behind Lilaโs eyes but never truly showed, and he supposed sheโd seen the trick herself when she went searching through his pockets in the night.
โHow many coats do you suppose there are inside that one?โ she asked casually, as if inquiring about the weather, and not a complex enchantment.
โIโm not exactly sure,โ said Kell, digging in a gold-embroidered pocket and sighing inwardly with relief as his fingers skimmed a spare coin. โEvery now and then I think Iโve found them all, and then I stumble on a new one. And sometimes, old ones get lost. A couple of years ago I came across a short coat, an ugly green thing with patched elbows. But I havenโt seen it since.โ He drew the Red London lin from the coat and kissed it. Coins made perfect door keys. In theory, anything from a world would doโmost of what Kell wore came from Red Londonโbut coins were simple, solid, specific, and guaranteed to work. He couldnโt afford to muddy this up, not when a second life was on his hands (and it was, no matter what she claimed).
While heโd been searching for the token, Lila had emptied the money from her own pocketsโa rather eclectic assortment of shillings, pennies, and farthingsโand piled them on the dresser by her bed. Kell reached out and plucked a halfpenny off its stack to replace the Grey token heโd lost, while Lila chewed her lip and stared down at the coins a moment, hands thrust into the inner pockets of her cloak. She was fiddling with something there, and a few moments later she pulled out an elegant silver watch and set it beside the pile of coins.
โIโm ready,โ she said, tearing her eyes from the timepiece.
Iโm not, thought Kell, shrugging on his coat and crossing to the door. Another, smaller wave of dizziness hit, but it passed sooner than the last as he opened the door.
โWait,โ said Lila. โI thought weโd go the way you came. By the wall.โ
โWalls arenโt always where they ought to be,โ answered Kell. In truth, the Stoneโs Throw was one of the only places where the wallsย didnโtย change, but that made it no safer. The Setting Sun might have sat on the same foundation in Red London, but it was also the place where Kell did business, and one of the first places someone might come looking for him.
โBesides, we donโt know whatโor whoโโ he amended, remembering the attackers under their compulsion, โis waiting on the other side. Better get closer to where weโre going before we go there. Understand?โ
Lila looked as though she didnโt, but nodded all the same.
The two crept down the stairs, past a small landing that branched off down a narrow hall studded with rooms. Lila paused beside the nearest door and listened. A low rumbling snore came through the wood. Barron. She touched the door briefly, then pushed past Kell and down the remaining stairs without looking back. She slid the bolt on the back entrance and hurried into the alley. Kell followed her out, stopping long enough to raise his hand and will the metal lock back into place behind them. He listened to theย shhkย of metal sliding home, then turned to find Lila waiting, her back purposely to the tavern, as if her present were already her past.