Kenji lets out a low whistle.
Castle is calling Adamโs name, asking him to slow down, to speak to him, to discuss things in a rational manner. Adam never looks back.
โI told you he was moody,โ Kenji mutters.
โHeโs not moody,โ I hear myself say, but the words feel distant, disconnected from my lips. I feel numb, like my arms have been hollowed out.
Where did I leave my voice I canโt find my voice I canโt find my
โSo! You and me, huh?โ Kenji claps his hands together. โReady to get your ass kicked?โ
โKenji.โ
โYeah?โ
โI want you to take me to wherever they went.โ
Kenji is looking at me like Iโve just asked him to kick himself in the face. โUh, yeahโhow about a warmย hell noย to that request? Does that work for you? Because it works for me.โ
โI need to know whatโs going on.โ I turn to him, desperate, feeling stupid. โYou know, donโt you? You know whatโs wrongโโ
โOf course I know.โ He crosses his arms. Levels a look at me. โIย liveย with that poor bastard and I practically run this place. I know everything.โ
โSo why wonโt you tell me? Kenji,ย pleaseโโ
โYeah, um, Iโm going to pass on that, but you know what I will do? Iย willย help you to remove yourself the hell out of this dining hall where everyone is listening toย everything we say.โ This last bit he says extra loudly, looking around at the room, shaking his head. โGet back to your breakfasts, people.
Nothing to see here.โ
Itโs only then that I realize what a spectacle weโve made. Every eye in the room is blinking at me. I attempt a weak smile and a twitchy wave before allowing Kenji to shuffle me out of the room.
โNo need to wave at the people, princess. Itโs not a coronation ceremony.โ He pulls me into one of the many long, dimly lit corridors.
โTell me whatโs happening.โ I have to blink several times before my eyes adjust to the lighting. โThis isnโt fairโeveryone knows whatโs going on except for me.โ
He shrugs, leans one shoulder against the wall. โItโs not my place to tell. I mean, I like to mess with the guy, but Iโm not an asshole. He asked me not to say anything. So Iโm not going to say anything.โ
โButโI meanโis he okay? Can you at least tell me if heโs okay?โ
Kenji runs a hand over his eyes; exhales, annoyed. Shoots me a look. Says, โAll right, like, have you ever seen a train wreck?โ He doesnโt wait for me to answer. โI saw one when I was a kid. It was one of those big, crazy trains with a billion cars all hitched up together, totally derailed, half exploded. Shit was on fire and everyone was screaming and you justย knowย people are either dead or theyโre about to die and you really donโt want to watch but you just canโt look away, you know?โ He nods. Bites the inside of his cheek. โThis is kind of like that. Your boy is a freaking train wreck.โ
I canโt feel my legs.
โI mean, I donโt know,โ Kenji goes on. โPersonally? I think heโs overreacting. Worse things have happened, right? Hell, arenโt we up to our earlobes in crazier shit? But no, Mr. Adam Kent doesnโt seem to know that. I donโt even think he sleeps anymore. And you know what,โ he adds, leaning in, โI think heโs starting to freak James out a little, and to be honest itโs starting to piss me off because that kid is way too nice and way too cool to have to deal with Adamโs dramaโโ
But Iโm not listening anymore.
Iโm envisioning the worst possible scenarios, the worst possible outcomes.
Horrible, terrifying things that all end with Adam dying in some miserable way. He must be sick, or he must have some kind of terrible affliction, or something that causes him to do things he canโt control or oh, God,ย no
โYou have to tell me.โ
I donโt recognize my own voice. Kenji is looking at me, shocked, wide- eyed, genuine fear written across his features and itโs only then that I realize Iโve pinned him against the wall. My 10 fingers are curled into his shirt, fistfuls of fabric clenched in each hand, and I can only imagine what I must look like to him right now.
The scariest part is that I donโt even care.
โYouโre going to tell meย something, Kenji. You have to. I need to know.โ โYou, uhโโhe licks his lips, looks around, laughs a nervous laughโโyou
want to let go of me, maybe?โ
โWill you help me?โ
He scratches behind his hear. Cringes a little. โNo?โ
I slam him harder into the wall, recognize a rush of some wild kind of
adrenaline burning in my veins. Itโs strange, but I feel as though I could rip through the ground with my bare hands.
It seems like it would be easy. So easy.
โOkayโall rightโgoddamn.โ Kenji is holding his arms up, breathing a little fast. โJustโhow about you let me go, and Iโll, uh, Iโll take you to the research labs.โ
โThe research labs.โ
โYeah, thatโs where they do the testing. Itโs where we do all of our testing.โ โYou promise youโll take me if I let go?โ
โAre you going to bash my brain into the wall if I donโt?โ โProbably,โ I lie.
โThen yeah. Iโll take you.ย Damn.โ
I drop him and stumble backward; make an effort to pull myself together. I feel a little embarrassed now that Iโve let go of him. Some part of me feels like I mustโve overreacted. โIโm sorry about that,โ I tell him. โBut thank you. I appreciate your help.โ I try to lift my chin with some dignity.
Kenji snorts. Heโs looking at me like he has no idea who I am, like heโs not sure if he should laugh or applaud or run like hell in the opposite direction.
He rubs the back of his neck, eyes intent on my face. He wonโt stop staring. โWhat?โ I ask.
โHow much do you weigh?โ
โWow. Is that how you talk to every girl you meet? That explains so much.โ
โIโm about one hundred seventy-five pounds,โ he says. โOf muscle.โ I stare at him. โWould you like an award?โ
โWell, well, well,โ he says, cocking his head, the barest hint of a smile flickering across his face. โLook whoโs the smart-ass now.โ
โI think youโre rubbing off on me,โ I say. But heโs not smiling anymore.
โListen,โ he says. โIโm not trying to flatter myself by pointing this out, but I could toss you across the room with my pinkie finger. You weigh, like, less than nothing. Iโm almost twice your body mass.โ He pauses. โSo how the hell did you pin me against the wall?โ
โWhat?โ I frown. โWhat are you talking about?โ
โIโm talking aboutย youโโhe points at meโโpinningย meโโ he points at himselfโโagainst the wall.โ He points at the wall.
โYou mean youย actuallyย couldnโt move?โ I blink. โI thought you were just
afraid of touching me.โ
โNo,โ he says. โI legit could not move. I could hardly breathe.โ โYouโre kidding.โ
โHave you ever done that before?โ
โNo.โ Iโm shaking my head. โI mean I donโt think I . . .โ I gasp, as the memory of Warner and his torture chamber rushes to the forefront of my mind; I have to close my eyes against the influx of images. The barest recollection of that event is enough to make me feel unbearably nauseous; I can already feel my skin break into a cold sweat. Warner was testing me, trying to put me in a position where Iโd be forced to use my power on a toddler. I was so horrified, so enraged that I crashed through the concrete barrier to get to Warner, who was waiting on the other side. Iโd pinnedย himย against the wall, too. Only I didnโt realize he was cowed by my strength. I thought he was afraid to move because Iโd gotten too close to touching him.
I guess I was wrong.
โYeah,โ Kenji says, nodding at something he must see on my face. โWell. Thatโs what I thought. Weโll have to remember this juicy tidbit when we get around to our real training sessions.โ He throws me a loaded look. โWhenever that actually happens.โ
Iโm nodding, not really paying attention. โSure. Fine. But first, take me to the research rooms.โ
Kenji sighs. Waves his hand with a bow and a flourish. โAfter you, princess.โ