Bonny calls Laurel at work on Monday. Laurel recognizes her been-around-the-block voice immediately.
โWeโve been talking,โ she begins, โabout Christmas.โ
Laurel stops herself groaning. She cannot possibly bring herself to think about Christmas even though itโs less than a week away and the world is full of lights and music and even the plumbing supplies shop has baubles in its windows. Sheโs not ready for it.
โNow, unfortunately weโre at my stepmotherโs on Christmas Day itself, sheโs eighty-four, far too frail to make it down to London, so weโll be heading up to Oxford. So what I thought is that we could do a big Christmas Eve bash here. We can do gifts and games and cocktails and what have you. And I have space for thousands, so all the children, partners, etc. And you can absolutely bring your gorgeous man and his lovely daughter.โ She pauses for breath; Laurel can hear the rattle of a cough in the bass of her breathing. โWhat do you think?โ
Laurel fingers the pendant at her collarbone.
โHave you asked Jake?โ she asks after another pause.
โYes. Yes I have.โ Thereโs a finality to this that tells Laurel immediately that Paul and Bonny are now aware of the current impasse.
โAnd is he coming?โ โHe says he thinks so.โ
โAnd what about Hanna?โ
โShe said yes. Sheโll be coming.โ
Laurelโs stomach lurches. Hanna has completely transmogrified in her mind from an ice princess destined never to thaw to a scarlet woman throwing herself at other peopleโs boyfriends with no thought for anyone but herself. Laurel no longer knows what to think about her daughter.
โWell,โ she says after a significant pause, โthat does sound lovely. Iโll ask Floyd. He did say that he and Poppy usually stay in on Christmas Eve, but Iโm sure they could be persuaded. Can I get back to you?โ
โYes, of course! Please do. But sooner rather than later, if you donโt mind. Iโll have to get my Waitrose order in by tomorrow at the very latest.โ
Waitrose orders. Laurel cannot imagine that she ever had a life that involved Waitrose orders.
She puts down her phone and sighs.
At Floydโs that night Laurel asks him how Poppy had reacted when Noelle dropped her on his doorstep and disappeared into thin air. โWas she happy?โ she says. โWas she sad? Did she miss her mum? What was it like?โ
โWell, first off,โ he replies, โshe looked awful. She was overweight, refused to let anyone brush her hair, bathe her, brush her teeth. So she was a mess. And that was basically why Noelle left her with me. Sheโd had this perfect little baby and sheโd totally fucked her up because she did not know how to parent and sheโd ended up four years later with a monster.
โAnd no, Poppy wasnโt sad. Poppy loved being here with me. When she was with me she behaved. She didnโt have tantrums. She didnโt demand chocolate spread on everything. She sat and we talked and she learned and she read and when Noelle left her here she was happy. Really happy. And of courseโโhe shrugsโโneither of us had any idea that we would never see her again after she dumped her with me. We thought sheโd be back. And by the time it was clear that she wasnโt coming back, Poppy and I were a team. I genuinely donโt think sheโs suffering because of not having Noelle in her life. I think . . .โ He glances up at her. โI think it was a blessing.โ
Laurelโs eyes flick to Floydโs and then away again. A thought passes through her head, so fast and so unpalatable that she is unable to keep hold of it.
Poppy stands at the top of the stairs. She hangs off the banister, her head tilting at an angle, her hair swinging back and forth.
โLaurel,โ she says in a stage whisper. โQuick. Come up!โ
Laurel looks at her quizzically and then says, โOK.โ
โCome in here. Quickly!โ Poppy pulls her by the hand into her bedroom. Laurel has never been into Poppyโs bedroom before.
Itโs a small square room overlooking the garden. She has a four-poster bed with white muslin curtains and the walls are painted white. Her duvet cover is white and her curtains are white with a fine gray stripe. Thereโs a chrome lamp on her white bedside table and white bookshelves are filled with novels.
โWow,โ says Laurel, stepping in, โyour room is very minimal.โ
โYes,โ she replies. โI like keeping it all simple. Sit,โ she says, pulling out a white wooden desk chair. โLook. My Christmas present for Dad arrived. Tell me what you think?โ
She opens the door of a white wardrobe and pulls out an Amazon delivery box.
Then she pulls out a large mug with the words โUNBEARABLE COFFEE SNOBโ written on it.
โOh!โ says Laurel. โThatโs fabulous! Heโll love it!โ
โBecause, he is, isnโt he? Heโs ridiculous about coffee. You know that stuff he has to have otherwise he says heโd rather drink water. Grown in Ethiopia with water from angelsโ tears . . .โ
Laurel smiles and says yes, lots of people are a bit weird about coffee these days and she really canโt tell the difference and sheโs the same with wine, it all tastes the same to her unless itโs bad and as sheโs talking her eyes pass across the detail of Poppyโs room and she stops and clasps her chest.
โPoppy,โ she says, getting to her feet, taking a few steps across the room, โwhere did you get those candlesticks?โ
Poppy glances up at the top shelf of her bookshelves where a pair of chunky geometric silver candlesticks are displayed.
โI donโt know,โ she says, โtheyโve always been there.โ
Laurel reaches to pick one up. Itโs hugely heavy in her hand, as sheโd known it would be. Because they are her candlesticks, the candlesticks taken in the burglary four years after Ellie disappeared, the candlesticks sheโs always been certain Ellie took.
โI donโt really like them,โ says Poppy. โI think they were Mumโs. You can have them if you like.โ
โNo,โ says Laurel, putting it back on the shelf, her stomach churning over and over. โNo. Theyโre yours. You keep them.โ