Mom: I miss you. When am I going to see you?
I stare at the text. Itโs been two days since Ryle found out Iโm pregnant. I know itโs time to tell my mother. Iโm not nervous about telling her Iโm pregnant. The only thing that scares me is discussing my situation with Ryle with her.
Me: Miss you, too. Iโll come over tomorrow afternoon. Can you make lasagna?
As soon as I close out the text to her, I get another incoming text.
Allysa: Come upstairs and eat dinner with us tonight. Itโs homemade pizza night.
I havenโt been to Allysaโs in a few days. Since before Ryle came home. Iโm not sure where heโs staying, but I assume itโs with them. The last thing I want right now is to have to be in the same apartment as him.
Me: Who all will be there?
Allysa: Lily . . . I wouldnโt do that to you. Heโs working until 8 tomorrow morning. Itโll just be the three of us.
She knows me way too well. I text her back and tell her Iโll come over as soon as I ๏ฌnish up with work.
โข โข โข โWhat do babies eat at this age?โ
Weโre all seated around the table. Rylee was asleep when I got
here, but I woke her up so I could hold her. Allysa didnโt mind; she said she doesnโt want her wide awake when sheโs ready to go to bed.
โBreast milk,โ Marshall says with a mouthful. โBut sometimes I stick my ๏ฌnger in my soda and put it in her mouth so she can taste it.โ
โMarshall!โ Allysa yells. โYou better be kidding.โ
โTotally kidding,โ he says, although I canโt tell if he really is.
โBut when do they start eating baby food?โ I ask. I ๏ฌgure I need to learn this stuff before giving birth.
โAround four months,โ Allysa says with a yawn. She drops her fork and leans back in her chair, rubbing her eyes.
โYou want me to keep her at my place tonight so you guys can get a full night of sleep?โ
Allysa says, โNo, itโs ๏ฌne,โ at the same time Marshall says, โThat would be awesome.โ
I laugh. โReally. I live right downstairs. I donโt work tomorrow so if I donโt get any sleep tonight I can just sleep in tomorrow.โ
Allysa looks like sheโs contemplating it for a moment. โI could leave my cell phone on in case you need me.โ
I look back down at Rylee and grin. โDid you hear that? You get to have a sleepover with Aunt Lily!โ
โข โข โข
With everything Allysa is throwing in her diaper bag, it looks like Iโm about to take Rylee on a trip across the country. โSheโll let you know when sheโs hungry. Donโt use the microwave to heat the milk, just put it in . . .โ
โI know,โ I interrupt. โIโve made her like ๏ฌfty bottles since sheโs been alive.โ
Allysa nods and then walks over to her bed. She drops the diaper bag down beside me. Marshall is in the living room feeding Rylee one last time, so Allysa lies down beside me on the bed while we wait. She props her head up on her hand.
โDo you know what this means?โ she asks. โNo. What?โ
โI get to have sex tonight. Itโs been four months.โ I crinkle up my nose. โI didnโt need to know that.โ
She laughs and falls down on her pillow, but then sits straight up. โShit,โ she says. โI should probably shave my legs. I think itโs been four months since I did that, too.โ
I laugh, but then I gasp. My hands move quickly to my stomach. โOh my God! I just felt something!โ
โReally?โ Allysa puts her hand on my stomach and weโre both quiet for the next ๏ฌve minutes as we wait for it to happen again. It does, but itโs so soft, itโs almost unnoticeable. I laugh again as soon as it happens.
โI didnโt feel anything,โ Allysa says, pouting. โI guess itโll be a few more weeks before you can feel it from the outside, though. Is this the ๏ฌrst time you felt it move?โ
โYeah. Iโve been scared I was growing the laziest baby in history.โ I keep my hands on my stomach, hoping to feel it again. We sit quietly for a few more minutes, and I canโt help but wish my circumstances were different. Ryle should be here. He should be the one sitting beside me with his hand on my stomach. Not Allysa.
The thought almost takes away all the joy Iโm feeling. Allysa must notice because she puts one of her hands on mine and squeezes. When I look at her, she isnโt smiling anymore.
โLily,โ she says. โIโve been wanting to say something to you.โ Oh, God. I donโt like the sound of her voice.
โWhat is it?โ
She sighs and then forces a gloomy smile. โI know youโre sad that youโre going through this without my brother. No matter how involved he is, I just want you to know that this is going to be the best thing youโve ever experienced in your life. Youโre gonna be a great mom, Lily. This baby isย reallyย lucky.โ
Iโm glad Allysa is the only one in here right now, because her
words make me laugh, cry, and snot like a hormonal teenager. I hug her and tell her thank you. Itโs amazing how hearing those words gives me back the joy I was feeling.
She smiles and then says, โNow go get my baby and take her away from here so I can have some sex with my ๏ฌlthy rich husband.โ
I roll off the bed and stand up. โYou sure know how to bring levity into a situation. Iโd say itโs your strong point.โ
She smiles. โThatโs what Iโm here for. Now go away.โ
