โIโm heading out. You need me to do anything else?โ
I look up from the paperwork and shake my head. โThank you, Serena. See you tomorrow.โ
She nods and walks away, leaving the door to my of๏ฌce open.
Allysaโs last day was two weeks ago. Sheโs due any day now. I have two other full-time employees, Serena and Lucy.
Yes. Thatย Lucy.
Sheโs been married for a couple of months now and came in looking for a job two weeks ago. Itโs actually worked out pretty well. She keeps herself busy, and if Iโm here when she is, I just keep my of๏ฌce door shut so I donโt have to listen to her sing.
Itโs been almost a month since the incident on the stairs. Even with everything Ryle told me about his childhood, the forgiveness was still hard to come by.
I know Ryle has a temper. I saw it the ๏ฌrst night we met, before we ever even spoke a word to each other. I saw it that awful night in my kitchen. I saw it when he found the phone number in my phone case.
But I also see the difference between Ryle and my father.
Ryle is compassionate. He does things my father never would have done. He donates to charity, he cares about other people, he puts me before everything. Ryle would never in a million years make me park in the driveway while he took the garage.
I have to remind myself of those things. Sometimes the girl inside of meโthe daughter of my fatherโis really opinionated. She tells me I shouldnโt have forgiven him. She tells me I should have left the ๏ฌrst time. And sometimes I believe that voice. But then the side of me that knows Ryle understands that marriages arenโt perfect. Sometimes there are moments that both parties regret. And I wonder how Iโd feel about myself had I just left him after that ๏ฌrst incident. He never should have pushed me, but I
also did thingsย Iย wasnโt proud of. And if Iโd have just left, would that not be going against our marriage vows?ย For better or for worse.ย I refuse to give up on my marriage that easily.
I am a strong woman. Iโve been around abusive situations my whole life. I will never become my mother. I believe that a hundred percent. And Ryle will never become my father. I think we needed what happened on the stairwell to happen so that I would know his past and weโd be able to work on it together.
Last week we got into another ๏ฌght.
I was scared. The other two ๏ฌghts weโd gotten into did not end well, and I knew this would be a testament to whether or not our agreement for me to help him through his anger would work.
We were discussing his career. Heโs ๏ฌnished with his residency now and thereโs a three-month specialized course in Cambridge, England, he applied for. Heโll ๏ฌnd out soon if he was approved, but thatโs not why I was upset. Itโs a great opportunity and Iโd never ask him not to go. Three months is nothing with how busy we are, so that wasnโt even what got me so upset. I became upset when he discussed what he wanted to doย afterย the Cambridge trip was over.
He was offered a job in Minnesota at the Mayo Clinic and he wants us to move there. He said Mass General is rated the second best neurological hospital in the world. Mayo Clinic is number one. He said he never intended to stay in Boston forever. I told him that would have been a good subject to bring up when we discussed our futures on the ๏ฌight to get married in Vegas. I canโt leave Boston. My mother lives here. Allysa lives here. He told me it was only a ๏ฌve-hour ๏ฌight and that we could visit as often as we wanted.
I told him it was pretty hard to run a ๏ฌoral business when you live several states away.
The ๏ฌght continued to escalate and both of us were getting angrier by the second. At one point, he knocked a vase full of ๏ฌowers off the table and onto the ๏ฌoor. We both just stared at them for a moment. I was scared, wondering if I had made the right decision to stay. To trust that we could work on his anger issues together. He took a deep breath and he said, โIโm going to leave for an hour or two. I think I need to walk away. When I get back, weโll continue this discussion.โ
He walked out the door and, true to his word, he came back an hour later when he was much calmer. He dropped his keys on the table and then walked straight to where I was standing. He took my face in his hands and he said, โI told you I wanted to be the best in my ๏ฌeld, Lily. I told you this the ๏ฌrst night we ever met. It was one of my naked truths. But if I have to choose between working at the best hospital in the world and making my wife happy . . . I choose you. Youย areย my success. As long as youโre happy, I donโt care where I work. Weโll stay in Boston.โ
Thatโs when I knew that I had made the right choice. Everyone deserves another chance. Especially the people who mean the most to you.
Itโs been a week since that ๏ฌght and he hasnโt mentioned moving again. I feel bad, like I thwarted his plans in some way, but marriage is about compromise. Itโs about doing whatโs best for the couple as a whole, not individually. And staying in Boston is better for everyone in both of our families.
Speaking of families, I look over at my phone right as a text from Allysa comes through.
Allysa: Are you ๏ฌnished up at work yet? I need your opinion on furniture. Me: Be there in ๏ฌfteen minutes.
I donโt know if itโs the impending delivery or the fact that sheโs not currently working, but Iโm pretty sure Iโve spent more time at her house this week than I have at my own. I close up the shop and head toward her apartment.
โข โข โข
When I step off the elevator, thereโs a note taped to her apartment door. I see my name written across it, so I pull it off the door.
Lily,
On the seventh ๏ฌoor. Apartment 749.
โA
She has an apartment here just for extra furniture?ย I know theyโre rich, but even that seems a little excessive for them. I get on the elevator and press the button for the seventh ๏ฌoor. When the doors open, I head down the hall toward apartment 749. When I reach it,
I have no idea if I should knock or just go inside. For all I know, someone could live here. Probably one of herย people.
I knock on the door and hear footsteps from the other side.
Iโm shocked when the door swings open and Ryle is standing in front of me.
โHey,โ I say, confused. โWhat are you doing here?โ
He grins and leans against the doorframe. โI live here. What areย youย doing here?โ
I glance at the pewter number plate next to the door and then back at him. โWhat do you mean you live here? I thought you lived with me. Youโve had your own apartment this whole time?โ I would think an entire apartment would be something a husband would bring up to his wife at some point. Itโs a little unnerving.
Actually, itโs ludicrous and deceptive. I think I might be really angry at him right now.
Ryle laughs and pushes off the doorframe. Now heโs ๏ฌlling up the entire doorway as he lifts his hands to the frame over his head and grips it. โI havenโt really had a chance to tell you about this apartment, considering I just signed the paperwork on it this morning.โ
I take a step back. โWait. What?โ
He reaches for my hand and pulls me inside the apartment. โWelcome home, Lily.โ
I pause in the foyer.
Yes. I saidย foyer. There is aย foyer.ย โYou bought an apartment?โ
He nods slowly, gauging my reaction. โYou bought an apartment,โ I repeat.
Heโs still nodding. โI did. Is that okay? I ๏ฌgured since we live together now we could use the extra room.โ
I spin in a slow circle. When my eyes land on the kitchen, I pause. Itโs not as big as Allysaโs kitchen, but itโs just as white and almost as beautiful. Thereโs a wine cooler and a dishwasher, two things my own apartment doesnโt have. I walk into the kitchen and look around, scared to touch anything.ย Is this really my kitchen? This canโt be my kitchen.
I look in the living room at the cathedral ceilings and the huge
windows overlooking Boston Harbor.
โLily?โ he says from behind me. โYou arenโt mad, are you?โ
I spin and face him, realizing that heโs been waiting on me to react for the past several minutes. But Iโm completely speechless.
I shake my head and bring my hand up to cover my mouth. โI donโt think so,โ I whisper.
He walks up to me and takes my hands in his, pulling them up between us. โYou donโtย thinkย so?โ He looks worried and confused. โPlease give me a naked truth, because Iโm starting to think maybe I shouldnโt have done this as a surprise.โ
I look down at the hardwood ๏ฌoor. Itโs real hardwood. Itโs not laminate. โOkay,โ I say, looking back up at him. โI think itโs crazy that you just went and bought an apartment without me. I feel like thatโs something we should have done together.โ
Heโs nodding and it looks like heโs about to spit out an apology, but Iโm not ๏ฌnished.
โBut my naked truth is that . . . itโs perfect. I donโt even know what to say, Ryle. Everything is so clean. Iโm scared to move. I might get something dirty.โ
He blows out a rush of air and pulls me to him. โYou can get it dirty, babe. Itโs yours. You can get it as dirty as you want.โ He kisses the side of my head and I donโt even say thank you yet. It seems like such a small response to such a huge gesture.
โWhen do we move in?โ
He shrugs. โTomorrow? I have the day off. Itโs not like we have a whole lot of stuff. We can spend the next few weeks buying new furniture.โ
I nod, trying to run through tomorrowโs schedule in my head. I already knew Ryle was off tomorrow, so I didnโt have anything planned.
I suddenly feel the need to sit down. There arenโt any chairs, but luckily, the ๏ฌoor is clean. โI need to sit down.โ
Ryle helps me to the ๏ฌoor and then he lowers himself in front of me, still holding my hands.
โDoes Allysa know?โ I ask him.
He smiles and nods his head. โSheโs so excited, Lily. Iโve been thinking about getting an apartment here for a while now. After we decided to stay in Boston for good, I just went ahead with it to
surprise you. She helped, but I was starting to worry sheโd tell you before I had the chance.โ
I just canโt wrap my head around this. I live here? Me and Allysa get to be neighbors now? I donโt know why I feel like this should bother me, because I really am excited about it.
He smiles and then says, โI know you need a minute to process everything, but you havenโt seen the best part and itโs killing me.โ
โShow me!โ
He grins and pulls me to my feet. We make our way through the living room and down a hallway. He opens each door and tells me what the rooms are, but doesnโt even give me time to go in any of them. By the time we make it to the master bedroom, Iโve concluded that we live in a three-bedroom, two-bath apartment. With an of๏ฌce.
I donโt even have time to process the beauty of the bedroom as he pulls me across the room. He reaches a wall covered by a curtain and he turns and faces me. โItโs not a ground that you can plant a garden in, but with a few pots, it can come close.โ He pulls the curtain aside and opens a door, revealing a huge balcony. I follow him outside, already daydreaming about all the potted plants I could ๏ฌt up here.
โIt overlooks the same view as the rooftop deck,โ he says. โWeโll always have the same view we had from the night we met.โ
It took a while to sink in, but it all hits me in this moment and I just start crying. Ryle pulls me to his chest and wraps his arms tightly around me. โLily,โ he whispers, running his hand over my hair. โI didnโt mean to make you cry.โ
I laugh between my tears. โI just canโt believe I live here.โ I pull away from his chest and look up at him. โAre we rich? How can you afford this?โ
He laughs. โYou married a neurosurgeon, Lily. You arenโt necessarily strapped for cash.โ
His comment makes me laugh and then I cry some more. And then we have our very ๏ฌrst visitor because someone begins pounding on the door.
โAllysa,โ he says. โSheโs been waiting down the hall.โ
I run to the front door and swing it open and we both hug and squeal and I might even cry a little more.
We spend the rest of the evening at our new apartment. Ryle orders Chinese takeout and Marshall comes down to eat with us. We have no tables or chairs yet, so the four of us sit in the middle of the living room ๏ฌoor and eat straight out of the containers. We talk about how weโll decorate, we talk about all the neighborly things weโll do together, we talk about Allysaโs impending delivery.
Itโs everything and more.
I canโt wait to tell my mother.
