Act 1, Scene 1 Messina – before Leonato’s house
(LEONATO, BEATRICE, HERO, URSULA, MARGARET, MESSENGER and NELL.)
LEONATO
I learn in this letter that Don Pedro comes this night to Messina.
MESSENGER
He was not three leagues* off when I left him.
LEONATO
How many gentlemen have you lost in this battle?
MESSENGER
Few of any sort, and none of name.
LEONATO
A victory is twice itself when the achiever brings home full numbers.
I find here that Don Pedro hath bestowed much honor on a young Florentine called Claudio.
MESSENGER
He hath borne himself beyond the promise of his age, doing in the figure of a lamb the feats of a lion.
LEONATO
He hath an uncle here in Messina will be very much glad of it.
BEATRICE
I pray you, is Signior Mountanto returned from the wars or no?
MESSENGER
I know none of that name, lady. There was none such in the army of any sort.
LEONATO
What is he that you ask for, niece?
HERO
My cousin means Signior Benedick of Padua.
MESSENGER
O he’s returned, and as pleasant as ever he was.
BEATRICE
I pray you, how many hath he killed and eaten in these wars?
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But how many hath he killed, for indeed I promised to eat all of his killing.
league – about 3 miles
LEONATO
Faith niece, you tax Signior Benedick too much. But he’ll be meet* with you, I doubt it not.
You must not sir, mistake my niece. There is a kind of merry war between Signior Benedick and her. They never meet but there’s a skirmish of wit between them.
BEATRICE
Alas, he gets nothing by that.
In our last conflict four of his five wits went halting off, and now is the whole man governed with one;
so that if he have wit enough to keep himself warm,
let him bear it for a difference between himself and his horse.
MESSENGER
I see, lady, the gentleman is not in your books.
BEATRICE
No. And he were, I would burn my study.
MESSENGER
I will stay friends with you, lady.
BEATRICE
Do, good friend.
LEONATO
Don Pedro is approaching.
(Enter DON PEDRO, DON JOHN, BORACHIO, CONRADE, CLAUDIO, BENEDICK,
BALTHASAR and soldiers.)
DON PEDRO
Good Signior Leonato, are you come to meet your trouble? The fashion of the world is to avoid cost, and you encounter it.
LEONATO
Never came trouble to my house in the likeness of your grace.
DON PEDRO
You embrace your charge* too willingly. I think this is your daughter.
LEONATO
Her mother hath many times told me so.
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BENEDICK
Were you in doubt sir, that you asked her?
be meet – get even, charge – expense and responsibility
LEONATO
Signior Benedick, no; for then were you a child.
(LEONATO and DON PEDRO draw aside in private conversation.)
BENEDICK
If Signior Leonato be her father, she would not have his head on her shoulders for all Messina.
BEATRICE
I wonder that you will always be talking, Signior Benedick; nobody marks you.
BENEDICK
My dear Lady Disdain. Are you yet living?
BEATRICE
Is it possible disdain should die while she hath such meet* food to feed her as Signior Benedick?
BENEDICK
It is certain I am loved of all ladies, only you excepted;
and I would I could find in my heart that I had not a hard heart, for truly, I love none.
BEATRICE
A dear happiness to women. They would else have been troubled with a pernicious* suitor. I had rather hear my dog bark at a crow than a man swear he loves me.
BENEDICK
God keep your ladyship still in that mind,
so some gentleman or other shall escape a predestinate scratched face.
BEATRICE
Scratching could not make it worse, and ’twere such a face as yours were.
BENEDICK
Well, you are a rare parrot-teacher.
BEATRICE
A bird of my tongue is better than a beast of yours.
BENEDICK
I would my horse had the speed of your tongue, and so good a continuer. But keep your way, in God’s name! I have done.
BEATRICE
You always end with a jade’s trick.* I know you of old.
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DON PEDRO
That is the sum of all, Leonato.
meet – suitable, pernicious – wicked; evil; fatal, jade’s trick – horse joke
Signior Claudio and Signior Benedick, my dear friend Leonato hath again invited you all. I tell him we shall stay here at least a month,
and he heartily prays some occasion may detain us longer.
LEONATO
(To DON JOHN.) Let me bid you welcome, my lord.
Being reconciled to the Prince your brother, I owe you all duty.
DON JOHN
I thank you. I am not of many words, but I thank you.
LEONATO
Please it your grace lead on?
DON PEDRO
Your hand Leonato; we will go together.
(Exeunt all except BENEDICK and CLAUDIO.)
CLAUDIO
Benedick, didst thou note the daughter of Signior Leonato?
BENEDICK
I noted her not; but I looked on her.
CLAUDIO
Is she not a modest young lady?
BENEDICK
Would you have me speak after my custom, as being a professed tyrant to their sex?
CLAUDIO
No. I pray thee speak in sober judgment.
BENEDICK
Why, methinks she’s too low for a high praise, and too little for a great praise.
Only this commendation I can afford her, that were she other than she is, she were unhandsome; and being no other but as she is, I do not like her.
CLAUDIO
Thou thinkst I am in sport. I pray thee, tell me how thou truly lik’st her.
BENEDICK
Would you buy her, that you inquire after her?
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CLAUDIO
Can the world buy such a jewel?
BENEDICK
Yea, and a case to put it into.
CLAUDIO
In mine eye she is the sweetest lady that ever I looked on.
BENEDICK
I can see yet without spectacles and I see no such matter. There’s her cousin, and if she were not possessed with a fury,
exceeds her as much in beauty as the first of May doth the last of December. But I hope you have no intent to turn husband, have you?
CLAUDIO
I would scarce trust myself, though I had sworn to the contrary, if Hero would be my wife.
BENEDICK
Is it come to this? Hath not the world one man but he will wear his cap with suspicion?* Shall I never see a bachelor of threescore* again?
Look, Don Pedro is returned to seek you.
(Re-enter DON PEDRO.)
DON PEDRO
What secret hath held you here, that you followed not to Leonato’s?
BENEDICK
I would your Grace would constrain* me to tell.
DON PEDRO
I charge you on your allegiance.
BENEDICK
You hear count Claudio. I can be secret as a dumb man, I would have you think so, but on my allegiance–mark you this–on my allegiance, he is in love.
With who? Mark how short his answer is; with Hero, Leonato’s short daughter.
DON PEDRO
Amen, if you love her, for the lady is very well worthy.
CLAUDIO
You speak this to fetch me in my lord.
DON PEDRO
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By my troth,* I speak my thought.
wear his cap with suspicion – for fear he has horns under it because his wife has made him a cuckold,
threescore – sixty, constrain – force, troth – truth
CLAUDIO
And in faith, my lord, I spoke mine.
BENEDICK
And by my two faiths and troths, my lord, I spoke mine.
CLAUDIO
That I love her, I feel.
DON PEDRO
That she is worthy, I know.
BENEDICK
That I neither feel how she should be loved, nor know how she should be worthy, is the opinion that fire cannot melt out of me. I will live a bachelor.
DON PEDRO
I shall see thee, ere* I die, look pale with love.
BENEDICK
With anger, with sickness, or with hunger, my lord, not with love.
Prove that ever I lose more blood with love than I will get again with drinking,
pick out my eyes with a ballad maker’s pen and hang me up at the door of a tavern for the sign of blind Cupid.
DON PEDRO
Well, if ever thou dost fall from this faith, thou wilt prove a notable argument.*
BENEDICK
If I do, hang me in a bottle like a cat and shoot at me;
and he that hits me, let him be clapped on the shoulder and called Adam.
DON PEDRO
Well, as time shall try.*
Good Signior Benedick, repair to Leonato’s.
Commend me to him and tell him I will not fail him at supper.
BENEDICK
I leave you.
(Exit BENEDICK.)
CLAUDIO
Hath Leonato any son, my lord?
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DON PEDRO
No child but Hero; she’s his only heir. Dost thou affect* her, Claudio?
ere – before, notable argument – famous example, as time shall try – we shall see, affect – desire
CLAUDIO
My lord, when you went to fight this battle, I looked upon her with a soldier’s eye, that liked, but had a rougher task in hand* than to drive liking to the name of love.
But now I am returned and war-thoughts having left their places vacant,
in their rooms come thronging soft and delicate desires, all prompting me how fair young Hero is.
DON PEDRO
If thou dost love fair Hero, cherish it, and I will break* with her and with her father, and thou shalt have her. Was it not to this end that thou began’st to twist so fine a story?
CLAUDIO
How sweetly you do minister to love.
DON PEDRO
I know we shall have revelling tonight.
I will assume thy part in some disguise and tell fair Hero I am Claudio, and in her bosom I’ll unclasp your heart. Then after to her father will I break,* and the conclusion is, she shall be thine.
In practice let us put it presently.
(Exeunt.)
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rougher task in hand – the coming battle, break – broach the subject
Act 1, Scene 3 Leonato’s house
(DON JOHN and CONRADE.)
CONRADE
Why are you thus out of measure* sad?
DON JOHN
I cannot hide what I am.
I must be sad when I have cause, and smile at no man’s jests; eat when I have stomach, and wait for no man’s leisure; laugh when I am merry, and claw* no man in his humor.
And though I cannot be said to be a flattering honest man, it must not be denied that I am a plain-dealing villain.
CONRADE
Yea, but you must not make the full show of this till you may do it without controlment.* You have of late stood out against your brother, and he hath taken you newly into his grace,
where it is impossible you should take true root but by the fair weather that you make yourself.
DON JOHN
I had rather be a canker* in a hedge, than a rose in his grace.
If I had my mouth, I would bite; if I had my liberty, I would do my liking; in the meantime let me be that I am, and seek not to alter me.
(Enter BORACHIO.)
What news, Borachio?
BORACHIO
I came yonder from a great supper, and I can give you intelligence of an intended marriage.
DON JOHN
Will it serve for any model to build mischief on?
What is he for a fool that betroths himself to unquietness?
BORACHIO
Marry, it is your brother’s right hand.
DON JOHN
Who, the most exquisite Claudio?
BORACHIO
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Even he.
DON JOHN
And who? And who? Which way looks he?
out of measure – excessively, claw – flatter, controlment – restraint, canker – wild dog-rose (despised as a weed)
BORACHIO
Marry, on Hero, the daughter and heir of Leonato.
DON JOHN
A very forward March-chick.*
This may prove food to my displeasure.
That young start-up hath all the glory of my overthrow.* If I can cross him any way, I bless myself every way.
You are both sure, and will assist me?
CONRADE
To the death, my lord.
DON JOHN
Let us to the great supper. Their cheer is the greater that I am subdued. Would the cook were of my mind.*
Shall we go prove what’s to be done?
BORACHIO
We’ll wait upon your lordship.
(Exeunt DON JOHN, BORACHIO and CONRADE.)
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