Today was every hell my father had ever described. I stumbled from one fire to the next. A raid. A betrayal. Kazi pinned beneath the body of a raider, soaked in a pool of blood. The memory punched me again and again. And I still had more business to address.
There will be times you wonโt sleep, Jase. Times you wonโt eat.
Times youโll have a hundred decisions to make and not enough time to make just one. Times a choice will make you feel like your flesh is being peeled from your bones. Times youโll be hated for the decisions youโve made. Times you will hate yourself.
Youโll be torn a hundred ways. Youโll doubt your decisions and whom you trust, but above it all, you must always remember that you have a family, a history, and a town to protect. It is both your legacy and your duty. If the job ofย Patreiย were easy, I would have given it to someone else.
Now I understood my fatherโs anguish as he lay on his deathbed passing his duties on to me. It was as much a burden as it was an honor.
I burst into Caveโs End, and Beaufort jumped up from the divan to welcome me, a full goblet in one hand and a bottle in the other.
โWhat the hell did you think you were doing?โ I said.
โWell, this wasnโt the greeting I expected. Especially not whenโโ
โWe had an agreement that youโd stay out of sight. One of the Rahtan soldiers staying with us spotted you going into Darkcottage. I had to make
up a story about you being a groundsman.โ
Beaufort sneered. โWhy are they still here? I feel like a caged animal! I thought I told you to get rid of them!โ
I looked at him. Looked through an arched doorway at the rest of them sprawled around the โcageโ as he called it, stocked with fine wines, tobaccos, ridiculous amounts of imported Gitos olives and Gastineux fish eggs, andย heย was giving theย Patreiย orders now? I already saw myself throwing the whole lot of them out the gates of Torโs Watch in the middle of the night, weapons be damned.
He realized his mistake. โPatrei,ย Patrei, Iโm forgetting myself. Forgive me. Come in. Can I pour you a drink?โ
He explained that with so many of us away and Torโs Watch so quiet, he had thought it was safe to go to Raehouse and speak to Priya about more supplies, but then our caravan rolled into Greyson Tunnel, creating a flurry of activity. He waited until dusk when things quieted to return to Caveโs End.
More supplies?ย โWe just filled a large order for you.โ
โThereโs a lot of waste with experimentation Iโm afraid, but now with the formula and craft perfected, weโre ready to go into production.โ
I couldnโt deny I was happy to finally hear this news. Whoever was behind Fertig and his gang would crawl back to their hole and never bother Hellโs Mouth again.
โAnd the fever cure?โ
He shrugged. โGetting closer.โ
The same answer. Three children in Hellโs Mouth had died last winter with fever. Three children too many. Beaufort had shown me the scholarsโ stacks of notes and the strange flasks and dishes that they experimented with, but the calculations meant nothing to me.
โFind it,โ I said. โBefore winter comes.โ
โOf course,โ Beaufort answered. โIโm sure weโll have it by then.โ
He set his goblet down and yelled toward the other room. โSarva! Kardos! Bahr! All of you! Get out here and help me show theย Patreiย what his money has bought!โ He put his arm over my shoulder, the rest of his sordid crew following after us, including the scholars, Torback and Phineas. โThis way,โ he said. โLetโs look at the final product.โ
We stood in the shelter of the sky cap, the part of the cave that extended over the house and a good portion of the grounds, but the winds were fierce and we were still pelted with rain. At least the storm and thunder would disguise the sound.
โLike this?โ I said, holding the launcher to my shoulder the way Kardos had shown me. He, Bahr, and Sarva were former soldiers. Sarva had once been a metalsmith, and he fashioned the launcher based on the scholarsโ designs.
โKeep it snug,โ Bahr warned. โThe mount will absorb a lot, but be prepared for kickback. Eye your target as if you were shooting an arrow. Now keep it steady while you pull the lever back.โ
A loud crack sounded and a flash lit up the end of the launcher, punching it into my shoulder and sending me back a step, but the noise was nothing compared to the explosion when it hit the target two hundred yards away. The surrounding mountains reverberated with the concussion.
There were cheers all around.
โThat going to take care of your problems?โ Bahr asked.
โYes,โ I answered. โAnd then some.โ I couldnโt wait to see the Candoran ambassadorโs reaction to it. He wouldnโt be yammering about development anymore, and no one would be touching arena caravans again.
โYou can get four shots out of each load,โ Sarva said. โThough I doubt youโll have anything to shoot at after the first.โ
โYou have all the specs written down?โ I asked. โCarefully documented?โ
โOf course we do,โ Beaufort answered.
โWhat about storage?โ I asked. โAny dangers there? Weโre close to the family homes.โ
โNone,โ Kardos said. โThough I wouldnโt throw the loads into the kitchen oven.โ They laughed like they were schooling a boy on the basics of safety.
โYou donโt need to worry about those details now,โ Sarva said. โWeโll go over it all when we deliver your first shipment.โ
I smiled, likeย shipmentย was the only word he needed to utter to send me on my way. โIn two weeks?โ
Beaufort nodded. โThatโs right.โ
โGood,โ I said. I turned the weapon over in my hands, examining it again. โIโll take this one in the meantime.โ I slung the launcher strap over my shoulder.
โHold on,โ Sarva ordered. โYou canโt take that.โ He reached out for me to hand it over.
I stared at him. I had almost been expecting his response but was still surprised. โWhy not, Sarva? Itโs mine, remember? I paid for it. For almost a year, Iโve been paying for it. And you have all the specs written down to make more.โ
He and Kardos exchanged glances, uncertain what to do.
Beaufort stepped forward, smiling, a forced chuckle in his throat, trying to tamp down the tension. โYes, of course we do, butโโ
โThen thereโs no problem here. I want to start training some of my men up in the lumber camps to work as caravan escorts. They always need the winter work.โ I reached over and swept the stacks of loads from the table into a canvas bag. โAnd Iโll take these too.โ
Sarvaโs mouth hung open as I turned away. There was still plenty more he wanted to say. As I left, Zane strolled out of the main drawing room into the foyer, eating a chicken leg. He was as surprised to see me as I was to see him. โWhat are you doing here?โ I asked. โItโs late for a delivery.โ
He hissed out a frustrated breath and shook his head. โI know. I came up the back way to drop off goods.โ He rolled his eyes. โMore wine and olives. The storm hit and now Iโm stuck.โ
โWe can put you up at Riverbend if youโd rather?โ
โThatโs all right. Iโve already got my stuff stowed. Hopefully, the storm will pass by morning.โ
He eyed the launcher on my shoulder. โYou taking that with you?โ โThatโs right.โ
He shrugged. โWant me to deliver it somewhere for you? As long as Iโm here? I canโโ He reached out to take it from me.
โNo,โ I said, walking away, โIโve got this one.โ
* * *
My hand rested on the door, just as it had several nights ago, debating whether to knock. I was soaked through, and my hair dripped onto the floor.
Kazi.ย I still wasnโt sure how this happened. When we were alone, when the world wasnโt looking over our shoulders, everything was easy. All I wanted was to be with her, hold her, listen to her voice, listen to her laugh,ย You donโt even know half of my tricks yet. I wanted to know them all. She might not commit to tomorrows, but I knew she wanted them as much as I did. It was late, probably too lateโ
The door swung open as if she had sensed I was out there.
โLook at you! Youโre drenched,โ she said and grabbed my hand, pulling me inside. โYou need a dry shirt andโโ
โI only need you, Kazi, thatโs all I need.โ